Tuesday, November 01, 2011
I have been doing a lot of thinking over the past few weeks, and I am ashamed to say that I have had every excuse in the book to have gained all this weight. My first excuse was pregnancy, and of course this can be a valid excuse, but my pregnancy didn't get me to eat cheese fries and cake ever so often. After pregnancy my next excuse was a car accident, and then a slip and fall and back injuries. Granted all of these are fair assessments of part of the reason I am over three hundred pounds now, but I have to stand up and realize that my back injury didn't make the wrong food choices. You know I pride myself in saying that I don't eat fast food, and never really did, but I didn't realize an order of cheese fries from Outback is just as bad as an order of fries from Wendys. In some cases it is worse. I know now that I am over weight, because I just didn't care about myself to make the right food choices. There is no reason for me to have lived my life like this, and to top it off I did this to my eight year old son. Boy if you ask him his favorite food he will tell you it is Outback cheese fries and steak.
Now is the time for me to make the change for the rest of my life, and it is not like I can never treat myself with some of the goodies I once loved, but it is the time to say when and how much. October 12,2011 was the first day of the rest of my life; tomorrow will be three weeks in, and my weight loss will be about ten pounds. I know that this is going to be a long hard journey and recovery, but I hope and pray to God that I have the strength and will power to remain on this path.
Remember it is never to late to try and make a change for your life, and believe me if you look for an excuse why you weigh more than you want then you will find one, but until you realize none of the excuses are the actual blame you want be ready to change your life. My husband has been working out with me and eating healthy, and it has been fantastic to do it with my partner, but sometimes very frustrating to see him closer to his goals than myself. I forget he only has about forty pounds to lose compared to my two hundred.
On a positive note since I have cut out most of the garbage in my life, and been working out as a family my son has even lost a few pounds. He is not fat, but he was on the wrong direction that is for sure. My family did a mile walk together last night, and it was so nice. I hope that I can get to three miles soon.
Have a great day everyone.
Monday, October 24, 2011
Wow I can't believe I have been doing this for almost two weeks. I think I have done very well watching what I eat and exercising between three and five days a week. I was so sick yesterday, so I didn't log any exercise in, but I ate a healthy amount of food without going over any fat calories carbs etc. I am hoping to be in good enough shape come January where I can walk around USF without wearing myself out. It is such a big campus, and I will be walking all around the campus. When I went on Friday for orientation I thought oh my goodness I am never going to make it. I have lost about four pounds, which I should be proud about, but I think I was hoping for bigger results. I am trying to stay focused on the healthier aspect of eating right and exercising not the results I see on the scale. I don't want to get depressed, because sometimes if I think I should be losing weight faster than I am and don't I fall back into the phase of well who cares. My husband keeps telling me how proud he is of me, and has also been trying to get in shape. We try and compete with each other, which is kind of fun, but I have to remind myself that he is in better shape than me, so he can do more than I can. For now that is. I am hoping to stay motivated and keep my spirits high until I don't have to stress about if I make a mistake and eat one thing wrong. I want to make myself ok with eating, and not eat out of depression or boredom, which I have been known to do, but only eat when I am hungry. Well thanks for reading my blog. I think this helps keep me on track when I write.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Wow my first week of my new diet and exercise plan is over! I am so proud of myself for completing one week. I did have one day where I thought this was pointless, and didn't know if I could make it, but I never gave up. For the whole week the only negative thing I ate was one chocolate chip cookie, but on the positive side I did stay in my means of calories and fat and carbohydrates every day. I have exercised or recorded it at least four days in the seven. My husband has finally decided to join me on this life long journey. I know I can do this; I just have to remember it doesn't happen over night. I think that is the hardest thing for me to remember, because it feels like I put the weight on over night. I have talked to some wonderful people here, and I know this is a great community to be apart of. You know it is crazy, because gaining all this weight has been real hard on me. When I was pregnant with my son, I was extremely ill, and wound up on bed rest. Well because of that I gained almost a hundred pounds in the last two months of my pregnancy. I was devastated to say the least. Eventually after having my son I tried to start exercising again, and well wound up in two sever accidents, and again was put out of commission for a long time. Doctors didn't know if I would be able to walk let alone exercise, but I over came that. Now that I am almost two hundred pounds over weight, and I have nobody to blame but myself I am ready to make a change. I know that it is going to be a long hard process, but I think I am ready to make this change. One of the positive things is that my eating habits (well when I actually eat) are good I love fruits and vegetables, and can't stand fast food. Today I did forty five minutes or aerobics, and I feel awesome. I hope I can keep up this stretch of feeling good about myself.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Wow loosing weight is hard; woke up this morning not knowing if I can do this. When I was younger I was very anorexic, which is why I was so slender. Now that I am trying to eat a few times a day I feel like I am going to get fatter. I have not been anorexic since being pregnant with my son, but sometimes I see me slipping down that path. I don't want to eat, because I am afraid to gain more weight. My sister in law keeps telling me i have to eat or I am going to get so sick, but it is hard. I feel like no matter what I do I am going to be fat for ever. I felt so good about myself after the first few days, but now I am not feeling so hot. I hope I can over come this demon I am feeling, and find some motivation fast! I am going to go make myself a healthy smoothie for breakfast, and maybe do some exercising I hope that helps my mood today. The only thing i have eaten unhealthy for myself in the last five days was one chocolate chip cookie, and i feel really bad about that now tooo!
Saturday, October 15, 2011
I am so proud of myself; I was so nervous to go out and eat, because the food is so tempting and fatty. I ordered myself a salad with a little grilled chicken; I put the ranch dressing on the side and only had about a tablespoon of it, because I didn't really eat much! Now I know if I can get through today I can get through any day. It has been four days, and I haven't slowed my pace. My husband says he is so proud of me, and knows that I can do it!
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