Sunday, September 11, 2011
I set my September goals and was really fired up about them and stuck to them for many days. Well, stuck to most of them. I'm having a heckofatime sticking under my calorie limit lately. For some reason, I feel more hungry, eat a little bit more than usual. It's no wonder I'm not losing! Especially when you consider I'm also struggling with my running (ZERO stamina).
As a refresher, here are my goals for September:
1) Lose 8 pounds . This is highly unlikely now. I'll be happy to lose 4!
2) Stick with my running/workout plans (alternating days). I am still sticking with it!
3) Eat within my SP range each day. This has been tough. I guess the thing is to just DO IT even if it means being hungry. What's so bad about that?
4) Tone every day. I was doing great with this until I went to yoga class on Wednesday, which was a major ab workout. I was so sore, I decided to give my abs a rest the next day, which led to two, then three... "Terrifying slide into obesity" (if you can identify that quote, I'll send you a SparkGoodie).
5) Meditate every day. Oooh, I was doing great with this one too.
6) Make vegetarian meals for the whole family. We are doing well with this one too. Hubby made veggie spaghetti the other night and it was delish.
7) Go to yoga class once a week. YES! Is this the one goal I can say I am doing perfectly on? There's only been one class since the start of September. I love yoga. It combines toning and meditation in such a peaceful, relaxing way.
I guess you could say I'm mildly frustrated because I'm so close to sticking to everything, and the little bit that I've been going over seems like such a little bit that I wish it didn't make a difference. Alas, wishes... Yeah. Reality and wishes don't so much go together.
So I keep thinking about my eating and where I need to cut back. Obviously the lunch-time dessert must go. We get free lunch at work, and it comes with a cookie or brownie. No one is shoving it in my mouth. Well, yes, I am! Time to X this habit or make it a once a week treat.
You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to print out my goals and hang them around the house and carry one in my purse. I think lots of times I plain forget to do some of these things. I'll be in bed, drifting off to sleep, when I remember that I forgot to meditate and tone that day. Duh!
Here's to better goal achievement in the remaining days of September!
Saturday, September 03, 2011
There's something about starting a new month or a new year or a new goal... I just love it! It feels all shiny new and achievable.
My goals for this month are:
1) Lose 8 pounds
2) Stick with my running/workout plans (alternating days)
3) Eat within my SP range each day
4) Tone every day
5) Meditate every day
6) Make vegetarian meals for the whole family
7) Go to yoga class once a week
So far I'm doing great! I'm sticking with the eating and exercising goals. I absolutely need to have goals well-defined in order to stick with them.
Hurrah, new month! Day 3 and going strong!
Sunday, August 28, 2011
I woke up this morning with my mind heartily fastened to the concept of choice, the many ways we make our paths in this world, the small choices we make every day that lead to our future comforts or difficulties, the more significant choices that we hope are well reasoned, the emotions that come into play with some choices. Sometimes it's hard to tell what is the right choice. Sometimes it's painfully obvious to everyone else, but not to you.
It's clear that eating healthfully and exercising regularly are the right choices if you want to have a healthy body. And yet, for many of us, we struggle to make those choices. We choose the over-large meal and the fifth cookie. We choose a night of television instead of a good long walk. What are we really choosing? If those are the choices day after day and night after night, then yes, we are choosing to be fat. We are choosing the consequences those unhealthy choices will inevitably reap.
It's a powerful thing, choosing. We really do get to choose what we eat, what we do with our time and our money, who we spend time with, and most importantly of all, our attitudes. That's what it all boils down to. Attitude is the starting point. It almost feels like a miracle to realize this: You get to choose even your attitude!
Sometimes the choices are hard. You forgo salon pampering and cable television to save for a dream vacation or to pay for your kids' piano lessons. You hold your tongue or walk away rather than getting drawn into someone's drama. You decide that someone else's needs are greater than your own. You skip a social event to stick to your workout plans. It's not always easy, but it gets you to your goal. It gives you peace of mind because your choices are in line with what you really want and value in life.
A few years ago, a small reading group that I'm involved in read a bunch of books about choice, starting with 7 Habits, and including Man's Search for Meaning and How We Choose to Be Happy. I can't tell you how many times, since we read those books, I have reminded myself "I choose." When life seems tough and my attitude is going down the crapper, I have to remind myself that I still get to choose!
We face so many struggles over the course of our lives. Some small, some self-invented, some really monumental. Losing my dad has been so incredibly hard. It's knocked me down and pushed me to think about a lot of stuff I probably wouldn't have otherwise. Regrets. What do you do with regrets? I could wallow in them and let them destroy me. I could avoid them and pretend they're not even there. But they are. And I choose to acknowledge them for what they are. Face them head on, analyze them, and forgive myself for my shortcomings. I know Dad would. I wish I had made more time for my family in the last few years. We used to visit so often, but in recent years, with busy kids, we just didn't. I can't change that now. I can't change the past, but I can change the present. I am visiting more now, as much as I can. I think Dad would like that. Oh how I wish he were here with us! But if we can get anything positive to come from this, let us learn something. Turn a regret into better choices NOW.
The same can be said about physical fitness. I regret that I don't look like Cindy Crawford (she's about my age). If I had been fit all my life, I could, even at this ripe middle-age, have a decent figure. But I didn't take care of my body. I regret that and I know that even if --WHEN -- I lose another 20 pounds, I will not have a Cindy Crawford-like body. I'll have a post-fat body. Post-30-years-of-fatness body. I can't change my history. I chose to overeat and be inactive. But I can change my present and my future body. I can choose to be fit and healthy NOW.
Monday, August 22, 2011
It's becoming obvious to me that I am in a state of flux with regard to my dedication to my fitness efforts and my grieving. It's not steady progress.
This I know about dieting and exercising, from a lifetime of yoyo dieting. It was all or nothing. This year was different. I actually stuck with it for 4 months and got myself in better shape. Now, oh boy, am I having a hard time sticking with it for more than a few days at a time. Thank God I haven't gained it all back! As soon as I go up a few pounds, I panic into "behaving" again. Maybe it's just going to continue to be this hard while I'm going through this emotional time.
But that's the other thing. I think I foolishly believed that over time I was going to become less of an emotional wreck, that somehow I was going to be able to cope with losing my dad and be stronger or something. As if it's a steady improvement. I can go a few days without breaking down, though of course he is on my mind all the time. I'm functioning. And then WHAM I have another very weepy, difficult day, and I realize this is how it's going to be. It's not constant improvement until I'm normal again. This is the new normal.
Normal. Such a bizarre concept.
The challenge for me, then, is to finally learn this lesson I've never gotten before. The emotional eating. The stress eating. How to stay healthy through hard times. I think I have the knowledge on how to do this. I'm just not putting it into practice consistently. This week. Can this be the week I stick with it? A whole week of sticking to my August goals. I'm going to give it my best shot again.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
A few people have asked what's up with my Eiffel Tower picture. Am I French? Do I live in Paris? Am I in love with the Eiffel Tower?
The story is simple. When choosing a picture, I didn't feel like putting my face up for the world to see. I have had a fascination with France for a long time and quite like this particular vintage photograph. So that's why I chose it. No great mystery.
I lived in France for one semester while I was in college and ever since then have been wanting to take a trip back there. Someday..... Until then, I soak up Frenchy stuff when I can and try to revive my French language skills.
Vive la France!
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