Sunday, March 30, 2014
This morning I woke up ready to see what results I have for this month. The first thing I thought of was stepping on the scale to see how my weight had changed. It is exactly the same as it was at the beginning of the month. I won't lie to you, I was a little upset with myself. So then I started thinking -- why is this the one thing that I let be the measure of my progress for my life? After all haven't I just spent a whole month focusing on what it means to love myself?
This isn't an "ah ha" moment for me. It is something that I have been working on for a long time. Clearly the "working on it" is not working. What if I were to just let go and forget about the number on the scale? I don't know the answer to this question, however I am willing to give it a try. I think this is an important step in my life journey. I am constantly telling myself that I love myself just as I am and that I accept myself just as I am. In reality I still judge myself by the number on the scale.
I have always loved this saying about love and I think that I strive to live my life this way in regards to the other people in my life, and now it is time for me to apply these principles to loving myself.
It has been a really interesting month for me. I have read books like Eat, Pray, Love - that has a theme of finding oneself. I have exercised and eaten healthy. I retired from work that I didn't really enjoy for several years. So I think I have really be nourishing myself - body, mind, and soul. This has been a month long self awareness project. And I have enjoyed it very much. If nothing else I have come to realize that it isn't that easy to just stop the negative self talk - and that it will be another one of those lifestyle changes of self awareness. Another thing that I learned was that there are a lot of things that I say that I love, but it is really the feeling that these things bring to my life that I love. And with all this talk of love I am ready to spend next month focusing on joy and happiness.