Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Tomorrow is weigh-in day. So far, so good. I went out to dinner with a sales rep tonight. I didn't know we were going until late in the day, so I couldn't do any advance planning. I finished tracking and went a little over my calorie range, but not too bad. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I am trying to be brutally honest about this.
Also I have been using a pedometer for about a week now. I actually walk quite a bit more than I thought I did. My parking lot is about a 10 minute walk from my office, and I often have to go to other buildings. I had to be out and about a little more than normal and logged over 9,500 steps! Cool!
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Where I work there are lunches put on by students who are in a cooking class. They have to come up with the menu and it's a pretty big deal. I signed up to go on Tuesdays with one of my co-workers. I think this goes on for 5 or 6 weeks. The meals are almost always delicious, but we don't know what the menu is until we get there. Last week I didn't like it so much so I didn't have any trouble leaving some food on my plate.
Well, today's lunch was absolutely delicious. Normally I never finish everything so I don't worry that I'm going over my calorie range. But not today! Everything was so good and I even ate all the dessert. I had already tracked breakfast, but I was so afraid to track lunch and dinner. I fell into the old mindset of "why bother, you know you really blew it today. Might as well go to town." But I did track it anyway, to the best of my ability. And you know what? I didn't blow it! I have been at the bottom of my calorie range and that's what I've gotten used to. So, I ate a little less for dinner, and I just tracked my dinner and I'm well within my range for the day. So, lesson learned. Even when I'm sure that I've messed up I won't throw in the towel. You never know, maybe it's not as bad as you think!
Monday, November 08, 2010
I walked 30 minutes today and my knee didn't hurt a bit. This is amazingly good. I have a lot of things going on at work this week, but I am making it a priority to actually take a lunch hour so I can take a walk. It clears my head a lot, but it also helps me organize my thoughts for the rest of the day. It's definitely not good to eat at the desk every day!
I used to walk every day. Sometimes in the summer I would walk at lunch and then again after work. It's been years since I've done that. It's supposed to be nice here later in the week, so I need to take advantage of that while I can. It won't be long before winter gets here and it's already dark when I leave work now.
Sunday, November 07, 2010
I was a little down the other day because it's tough living with a spouse who is trying to quit smoking. I quit myself about 25 years ago, so I know it's a struggle and it takes usually several attempts before success. The same has been true for me with weight loss. It takes a long time to acquire bad habits, although with tobacco I don't know.. there's not much debate about the chemical addiction of nicotine and other chemicals in cigarettes. But I digress.
I have been in denial or sublime ignorance for so many years! To start, I was always really skinny as a child and through college. I was the pickiest eater there was. I was such an embarrassment to my mom when we'd go someplace to eat. I remember when we went for Thanksgiving Dinner to relatives house my mom would make me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because I wouldn't eat anything else. My mom and relatives are great cooks, I just had very limited tastes. Even through college this persisted. The things I liked then were limited to peanut butter, hamburgers, ice cream, cookies, candy, etc. Really bad I know, but added to my dislike of anything good for me, I was a rather nervous person and when I got stressed out at school or home (which was all the time) I literally couldn't eat and dropped more weight. My mom and sister have always been pretty heavy, so I was really the exception in my family.
So what happened? I keep asking myself this. It wasn't one thing, it was a lot of things. This is what I think now.
(#1) For one thing, because I could eat anything I wanted to growing up (I just didn't WANT to eat anything) I never learned anything about nutrition or portion size or any of that. I continued to just eat anything I wanted.
(#2) When I got married and finished school, I wasn't as stressed out as before, so continuing the same eating habits was a huge mistake. All those high calorie high fat foods started to hang around.
(#3) I married a man who loves to cook. In fact, he cooks for a living. Growing up the menu was pretty bland, but my husband introduced me to many new foods. Unfortunately, I developed a taste for most them. Things like cheesecake. I never had cheesecake until our honeymoon because I thought the name sounded like it would taste awful.
(#4) No portion control. My husband served up food and I ate it... ALL of it. He's a man and he's a foot taller than I am. (We also have two sons who were very active in sports.) I didn't really realize this as an issue until I went to visit my parents for a few days last summer and my mom served dinner. The servings were way smaller and I was plenty full. In fact, I had no idea what a proper portion size was. Holy cow, Batman! What an epiphany! How could someone who considers herself reasonably intelligent miss the obvious for so long?
OK. So here I am. Since the boys are on their own now, my husband and I are both trying to deal with our bad habits -- him with smoking; me with eating. It's tougher for him I think because he doesn't have support like I do. We have started going to the farmer's market and we're even dabbling with organic produce and meat. Yes, I actually like vegetables now. My husband is being much more sensitive about letting me fill my own plate, and I sometimes use a dessert plate instead of a dinner plate. There are definitely struggles and we're both just getting started. The other really good thing that has happened is that my husband and I are spending a lot more quality time together. We have fun going shopping together and finding recipes that taste great and are more healthy. My husband really is an excellent cook and he tweaks things to make them more healthy for us.
So, it's all good...
Friday, November 05, 2010
My husband gave up smoking yesterday. He has stopped smoking basically from November to the beginning of April for the last 2 years. As anyone who has lived with someone trying to quit smoking for good or done it yourself (I have), you know that it is very trying for those around you. My husband gets very mean and it is during the first few weeks that he can become quite cruel. I try to take it in stride because I know firsthand how difficult it is to quit smoking, but sometimes it just hurts so much! Just as I know he doesn't like to smoke, he knows that I don't choose to be obese. Does he think I WANT to look like this? Also, I think it is harder for people to try to lose weight because it's not like we can give up eating altogether, right?
Things will get better in a few weeks, but right now I'm trying to calm down. I know it's going to be a rough weekend, and this is why I am so glad I have this site to come to. I can feel all the positive energy from kindred spirits every time I come here. There is definitely strength in numbers and I know I can stay positive about myself even though my journey will be a long one and I'm just getting started. I know the support I get here will pull me through.
(Don't get me wrong, my husband really is a good guy. He's just going through withdrawal right now so he's not himself.)
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