Wednesday, October 05, 2011
I have never been the one to really care about what I look like. I know I am overweight but I knew one day I would lose it and get back down the way I was before. DH doesn't mind the way I look. I really never cared about what anyone else thought. But lately, as I am getting dressed I would look at myself in the mirror and I am just plain disgusted. I cannot stand my "muffin top" any more. I am sick of finding a shirt that I like in my size but fits me weird because I am shaped like a pear. (We did some shopping this weekend). I just can't take it anymore. I should use this to motivate me but I just feel so tired this week (from that evil visitor). I have no energy. I hope I will have more energy next week. I will have to double up on my workout to get that 1000 monthly fitness minutes that I want to badly.
I know next week will be easier since DH will b back to work. I always get so much more done when he is not around. Plus my little visitor will be gone so I won't feel so drained.
I am ready to be a size 5 again. Even a 6, 7, 8, 9...a single digit!!!!! I wish I wasn't so short. That just makes it look even more worse.
So many things going on in my head! School, house stuff, weight, looks, even my face is breaking out again. I am really sick of that. I thought after a certain age your face starts clearing up??!! The dark circles around my eyes! I did a thing on Olay.com and it gave me recommendations based on my answers. I am going to get what they said.
I don't know why I am caring so much about my looks lately. I never cared before. I think it is starting to affect me that I feel older than I really am. Maybe my emotions are just getting the best of me this week. Oh well I guess I look on the brightside, at least it is going to be a beautiful week (getting up to 80), hope I can enjoy it!
meanwhile, have last exam today. I should know how I did on mondays exam today too. As long as he got them graded.
have a great day!