Wednesday, November 19, 2008
A long time ago, I wrote a blog about how I won't suffer to be thin. I won't give up my favorite things, I won't wear clothes that make me uncomfortable -- no matter if they hide flaws or make me feel thinner.
Today, in "Oprah Magazine", I was reading about a new collagen injection that lasts longer, called Evolence. I don't care how good something will make me look, I won't ever voluntarily step up for anything that involves shots. I can handle them if I have to, but I won't inflict pain on myself needlessly. Just like I would never have a nose job, unlike my sister (who did).
Evolence, apparently, is made from pig tendons, although you won't find that information on their Website -- unless it's buried somewhere. I was looking for it, and couldn't find it. I don't care if that comes from pigs that have been slaughtered for food, but to use animal parts to soothe my vanity is just wrong, in my humble opinion. Which makes me wonder where the collagen in other types of shots comes from.
Just like I won't use gelatin. Also comes from animals -- specifically from boiling the hooves. There are non-animal alternatives to gelatin, although they can be a little tricky to work with, but they're there.
I do believe it's okay to eat animals, as long as they've been humanely raised -- and that's not so easy to find. Which is why I don't eat a whole lot of animal products. Using them to simply look better? That just seems wrong to me.
I know this doesn't seem to have much to do about weight loss, but in a roundabout way I think it does. What is so wrong with aging anyway? We earn our wrinkles -- if you never laugh and enjoy life, you won't have nearly as many laugh lines, after all. There's nothing wrong in trying to look the best you can, but that doesn't mean you can't accept your body as it changes, either.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
It's funny how when you feel better, you do more; when you do more, you're more active without thinking about it; and suddenly the weight comes off. Which makes you feel better, so you do more . . . and so on.
Of course, the opposite is also true: when you're depressed, you don't want to do anything; when you don't do anything, you gain; when you gain, you feel even more depressed.
That's the snowball effect. It works for both good and evil (well, maybe not truly evil, but it's certainly not good).
Those giant snowballs start out as little, tiny snowflakes, too. That's why baby steps work. Take one little step, and before you know it, 5 pounds are gone. Because one step leads to another and another.
Just a few weeks ago I felt stuck. Unmotivated. Tired. Somehow, in the last couple of weeks, despite the stress in my life kicking up a notch, I just feel better. I wish I could tell you why, so I could spread it around. We all need some of that at this time of year!
What I can tell you is to keep the faith. Even when times are tough, believe in yourself and what you're doing. Keep taking those tiny steps, and before you know it, your efforts will pay off.
Monday, November 17, 2008
October on the left, November on the right. The intersting thing is that I was essentially plateaued from about mid-October to mid-November. I even had small gains the next couple of weeks after these photos were taken. But I can see more definition in my November photo -- you can actually see my collarbones again, even in these tiny photos!
I am not immune to unrealistic expectations:
1. Somehow I still think I will lose weight every week, as long as I follow my program. Unfortunately it just doesn't work that way, but I still believe it in my heart. I just don't let it get me down when it doesn't work that way -- and I hold onto those NSV (non-scale victories, like the emerging collarbones).
2. Somehow I expect to look at the photos and see a thin person. It doesn't matter that I see a thinner person, I expect a thin person. Like somehow the fat is going to go poof! overnight. Once again, my head knows this won't happen; but somehow the heart is a very dumb creature and expects what it wishes will be so. When I look in the mirror, I still see thinner person than when I look at photos. But the image is slowly catching up.
3. I claim that I wasn't in denial, and that is true in some ways and untrue in others. I knew I was fat (still am). I even had a pretty good idea of what I weighed without weighing myself. I told myself I didn't need to weigh myself, since I knew what I weighed. But somehow seeing that number on a scale really was the slap in the head I needed.
And talk about denial . . . I had some gym shorts. They were too tight. I told myself they shrunk. Sound familiar? After all, I'd been wearing the same jeans for years no problem, but the shorts were too tight, so they must have shrunk, right? Only they fit now. The jeans had spandex, the shorts didn't.
I don't have a photo record of myself losing weight the first time. I really do find it very motivating. Even when I don't see changes, I use that as motivation to stay on track. But sometimes I do see changes even when the scale isn't moving, like last month.
We all have unrealistic expectations at times. We're all human. The trick is not to let those expcetations get in the way of our journey. Accept what is, and then work your butt off to change it.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
I struggle with this a bit, because I do just buy most things I want. Don't get me wrong, we aren't rich, and we're watching money even more these days like everyone else -- and will probably have to pinch even more when we live in NY, where everything is more expensive.
So what makes a good reward?
1. Something tangible (for me). For instance, a massage would be a great reward for me . . . except once it's done, it's done. I want something that reminds me of what I've achieved.
2. The reward should fit the job. So getting a diamond bracelet for losing 5 pounds, for instance, wouldn't make a whole lot of sense to me. The reward for losing 20 pounds should be more than losing 10 pounds, for instance.
3. A non-food reward! Absolutely. Don't go out and celebrate with a dinner at a great restaurant. Rewarding ourselves with food is part of what got us into this mess in the first place.
4. Something you don't routinely buy. If you buy CDs all the time, for instance, it's not special; to my mind, it's not a reward. I only occasionally buy CDs, so it is a good reward for me.
These are just my rules, of course. Yours can be different.
My reward for losing 10 lbs: a whirley pop popcorn maker. I'm reminded every time I use it (a couple of times a week) of how far I've come.
My reward for losing 10% of my body weight: a pedometer. Actually, this breaks rule #2, because it cost about the same as my popcorn popper.
My reward for losing 20 lbs was going to be a Wii, but I think that one will have to be pushed back a bit. Like I said, we're watching our spending. Maybe it will be a set of harmony knitting needles from www.knitpicks.com ; I really like their needles. Knitting with beautiful needles just really soothes me.
How have you rewarded yourself? What's the best reward you've earned?
Saturday, November 15, 2008
I really wish there was some way to know exactly what works -- and what doesn't. Some weeks I don't change anything, others I may change several things. There's really no way to know. So here are a few of the things I think have been working lately:
1. Really watching the little things. Making sure there's as little mindless or uncounted eating as possible.
2. Giving up a sweet treat for popcorn after dinner a couple of times a week -- although I'll keep buttering my popcorn most of the time. I eat very little butter, so I'm okay with that.
3. Started a new exercise routine: Shaun T's Rockin' Body. I really like it; it's fun, and I'm dripping with sweat by the end. Not as hard as the 30 Day Shred, but it's mostly cardio -- and it's a lot more fun.
4. I've started to journal again, apart from this blog. A written, private journal. I'd been doing that a long time, but when the weather changed, I started knitting in the time I used to journal. So now I just journal at a different time of day.
5. The last couple of days I've been doing some exercise right after I feed the dogs -- in the time I've been knitting in the past. I'm not getting as much knitting done, but I actually find I'm feeling more energized. I started because it was the only way I could figure out how to get all my workouts in on Thursday before I left for the cat rescue.
6. I don't know if there's a cause and effect here, but I started eating about 95% vegetarian with my husband gone, and often vegan. But it's hardly the only change I made, it's just an interesting factoid to me.
7. Go to my WW meeting every week.
So there you have it. Is it one particular thing working? A combination of all of it? Probably the latter. The scale still goes up sometimes, down sometimes, and stays stuck sometimes. It is what it is. But that doesn't mean we can't keep trying to figure it out!
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