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JLITT62's Recent Blog Entries
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Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Nit too long ago one of my spark buddies blogged about how her husband was enjoying her newfound interest in fashion now that she's at her GW - and how she was sure he'd enjoy seeing her in a bikini, not that that was going to happen.
We are so hard on ourselves. So willing to be cheerleaders for our buddies, so unwilling to take our blinders off about ourselves - myself included. I still have a lot of body hang-ups. For instance, I hate being totally naked during . . . you-know. There, I admitted it - sort-of. It actually does feel good when I am, so why do I find it so difficult to do? I joked with my husband that I bet he never thought he'd be bargaining for that after 25 yrs of marriage.
Sometimes I think it's important to push ourselves out of our comfort zones. I actually prefer 2-piece swimming suits - so much easier to use a bathroom - but tankinis (are they not the best invention ever?) certainly feel safer. And skirted bathing suits nicely cover up some of my problem areas.
So why am I getting ready to appear in public in a bikini? Despite the fact that I most definitely don't have the perfect body & am not at my GW, not to mention I'm no spring chicken at 49 & have the cellulite, crepey skin, saddle bags, bra fat & stretch marks to prove it?
Part of it is to please my husband. But he'd be the first in line to tell you that I would never do it just for him.
The bigger part of it is to celebrate my body. I worked hard for it. It's not perfect, but then no one's is. I don't have to be perfect. You don't have to be perfect. And you don't have to wear a bikini, either.
But you do have to accept the one & only body you'll ever have & celebrate all the wonderful things it does for you.
Please, today, if only for a moment, celebrate your body in whatever way seems appropriate to you. Stop insulting it. Stop covering it up with ill-fitting clothes that do not let it shine. Stop hating it.
Praise it. Feel it. Really see it. Pamper it. And most of all, accept it. And then tell us what you did so we can be inspired.
Today I'm going to use a mask on my face & maybe some sugar scrub before my shower. I've been putting that off and my face is telling me it needs a little TLC.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Yes, somehow I ended up at Marshalls yet again. But here's a funny story (tho not so funny at the time!). I tried on a halter dress that looked like it was going to be really cute -- it had these diamond cutouts on the sides with sparkly stuff on it. I'm a sucker for sparkle.
It was a little tight going on, and once I got it over my head it was obvious it was never going to fit. Then when I went to take it back off . . . I couldn't! It took me about 15 minutes to peel it off me & I am NOT exaggerating. I think God is trying to tell me enough with the dresses already. Not sure I'll listen . . . the plan actually was to do some shopping in Vegas . . .
I don't think either of these look as good in the photos as they do in person. The dress below I'm keeping -- another one to mostly wear around the house. When I look at the photo it doesn't seem all that flattering, but in person I think it's cute. Maybe I'm just deluding myself. Maybe it's just too much for my petite frame.
Last week Ann Taylor Loft had all dresses 30% off. Woe is me. I walked away with the universally-flattering faux wrap dress.
Below is the dress I haven't decided on yet. They had it in 2 sizes -- a size 2 & 8. I tried the size 2, and could almost zip it, but not quite. And it really was just too tight all over. I know I'm not a size 8, but decided to try it on anyway cause I really liked the dress.
I really love the style & the print which is one of my favorite colors -- fuschia. In person I think it's cute; the photo does make it look too big. It only cost $15, and I could certainly get it taken in . . . opinions?
Now on to the non-clothes dilemma. Last year we started to rennovate our kitchem, knocking out walls & putting in more cabinets. The new cabinets are bilevel, blue counter with a copper trim in between that I just love.
I wanted to use that copper backsplash on the older side, which we didn't change, only it was very expensive and there was no way to attach it to the existing formica. This weekend DH surprised me with copper tiles he found online. Then he got carried away and applied them to about half the kitchen (it's a very small kitcehn).
My dilemma is what to do with the wall by the stove (see below).
It's just that tiny strip of wall. We could take off the formica that's already there (can we say weird & ugly?) and just leave it as is. I sort of lean towards that, frankly, altho it means we'll probably have to paint the wall.
We could tile up from the counter to the celing.
Or we could tile down from where the cabinets end to the floor.
Such an awkward space. I think it might be hard to keep those copper tiles clean by the stove (especially when DH gets on there & grills a hamburger with grease flying everywhere). Any opinions?
Keep in mind, too, that we'll be replacing the stove & microwave with stainless. In fact, the new stove has been ordered & is on its way. Have to decide about the microwave still.
Let er rip, & thank you.
Monday, May 09, 2011
Friday night I got the sad news that my aunt had died. She's my last aunt. She is survived by her husband, my last uncle, but I doubt for long.
She was about 90 & I knew she was very ill with pneumonia, so it was not a shock. Sadly my parents are in Europe on vacation, and we decided not to tell them until they get home next weekend, since they would never have been able to get to the funeral & it would just ruin their trip. They had almost not gone on the trip because of her condition.
Even my sister & I couldn't make it, because the funeral was yesterday & in San Diego, where they lived. I was torn, but it really was pretty impossible to make it happen in just a day.
I had only seen her a handful of times since they'd moved to CA. A few birthday parties, a business trip we made to San Diego quite a few years ago (I'll have to see if I can dig up a photo from that - I know I had a nice one somewhere), a bat mitzvah. She was always a very vibrant woman, full of life, always with her hair done & her clothes & her makeup just so. She never let herself go!
Both my aunts on my dad's side lived long lives, but they didn't thrive in their later years. My dad is 85, so no spring chicken either, but he has so much trouble getting around. As I told my husband this weekend, that's not how I want to end my life. I want to live well, not just live long!
I know there are no guarantees in life - both my dad & my aunt were in bad car accidents in their later years that contributed to their health problems - but I'm going to do my best to stack the odds in my favor. That means healthy food, plenty of movement, and good quality rest, too.
Let's all work on better odds.
Saturday, May 07, 2011
I'm an adventurous eater - I'll try most anything. So lately I've been trying new things. DH liked the chickpea granola bars & didn't mind the chocolate quinoa protein bars from nomeatathlete.com .
I think the quinoa bars are a miss, but the chickpea bars have potential, and will probably be revisited - I want to make some stuff to bring on vacation with me.
I tried sun chokes, aka Jerusalem artichokes last week. Ok - don't think I'll bother with them again. I sliced them & roasted them like I would most any veggie.
Last night I tried fiddlehead ferns. I ate most of them, but I won't be eating them again. They tasted bitter to me. I caramelized some red onion & sauteed them - didn't feel like chopping garlic to go along, but I don't think that would have made a difference.
So why am I sharing since most of it didn't move me? Cause if you eat the same old stuff all the time, you're short changing yourself of the nutrients you need. You'll only get a balance if you eat variety.
Sure, you can take a pill to get balance into your life, but you'll never be able to recreate the smorgasbord that nature can provide you. It's not nice to fool mother nature, after all!
Friday, May 06, 2011
One of my buds made the comment on how she envied my curves, since she's not a curvy girl. It took me a really, really long time to embrace those curves myself.
I didn't develop early & I'm not busty, so I didn't get unwanted attention from the boys early on. But I do have a big derriere & big hips - and I did get teased a lot because of that.
You have to keep in mind this was the 70s - the era of twiggy & Peggy Lipton. Thin was in. Long before JLo became famous for her butt. The last thing you want to do when you're a kid is stand out because of your body.
I wasn't even heavy then. I was never skinny, but I didn't start getting heavy until I was a teen.
So it has taken me a long, long time to embrace my curves, but I do. That's me - I can't change it & probably wouldn't even if I could. Just like I would never get a nose job like my sister did.
We are all beautiful in our own way. It's okay to be different - being average is boring!
Accepting ourselves goes way deeper than our looks. We have to accept the consequences of our beliefs & choices, too. As frustrated ad I get, I have never really stopped believing that I will get down to a healthy weight. I know I'm almost there, but I also just know in my bones that I have just a little further down this road to a healthy lifestyle to travel.
I also know that I didn't always make the best choices last week. A gain of 1+ pounds always surprises me because I never think I stray THAT much, but it's always a wakeup call, too. It's so easy into fooling ourselves that we're making healthy choices. Little choices can add up in a bad way, too.
I WILL continue on my journey to self acceptance, I WILL accept the consequences of my choices, & I WILL continue to believe that I can & WILL get to & maintain a healthy weight.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
You know I feel you on the hips and thighs.
I struggle with wanting my "flaws" to show, but hey, who started calling them flaws, anyway!? 
