Sunday, October 10, 2010
That's from Eckhert Tolle, I believe.
And this came to me this morning in one of my affirmations apps:
"All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in beliefs." -- Anthony Robbins
I can be stubborn. I like to think of myself as open minded, but the truth is at the same time if you tell me to do something, I'm more likely to protest it and maybe even do the opposite.
People like to give advice on blogs, even when you don't invite it. I'm not talking about any recent blogs in general, it's just the way it is (and I'm just as guilty of it as the next person).
Sometimes I think it's great advice. And sometimes I think that person missed the mark by a mile.
And I realized, recently, it's exactly those times that I think the person is obviously out to lunch that I really need to sit up and take notice. Think about it. Why am I resisting that particular suggestion so much? Could there be a kernel of truth in it? Maybe it's something I need to try before I discount it.
What about you? Do you find yourself easily taking advice, or more easily taking umbrage? What does that really say about you?
Saturday, October 09, 2010
Bet that title caught your eye. Guess what? It's a book title. I caught an interview with the author on the Today show yesterday. No, I haven't actually read the book yet.
And then I read yesterday's dailyspark -- www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=one
Maybe it's just me, but I found both deeply disturbing.
The basic message of Ugly as Sin seems to be that we're all ugly, we're all beautiful, we've been conditioned to think that way and let's just move on.
That we all think we're ugly, every single day.
Now I don't know about you, but I don't think I'm ugly every single day. Not even when I was at my heaviest. I am quite sure that there are people that think this way, but it wasn't me.
I don't find the idea of thinking of myself as ugly particularly freeing, either. I have to admit I think the author may have some issues, but then again, like I said, I haven't read the book.
Yes, we live in a society that treasures physical beauty. Yes, that can lead to all sorts of self image problems even when you truly are beautiful.
But what is wrong with believing that you're beautiful?
And the Dailyspark entry. It sounded so empowering. A celebrity that embraces her curves, essentially. But it was this last paragraph that really got to me:
"A size 8 still sounds small to me. When I saw recent pictures of her, Iíll be honest that I was surprised she was a size 8. I think thatís because Iím used to seeing celebrities who are so tiny. Sheíd look perfectly healthy walking down the street as an average person. But because Hargitay is a celebrity, some people consider her to be "curvy". When did a size 8 become curvy?"
Well, who the heck cares just what size she is? And why did the author have to even bring it up? Her point would have been made -- and been great -- if she'd just left that out. Just pointed out that here is an actress who's a fairly normal size -- which by Hollywood standards would be considered large -- who's healthy and happy. That would have been a great point.
Such a mixed message!
What do you think? Do you think that believing you're ugly can actually be freeing for you? Do you think that the dailyspark blog post missed the mark, or were they right on? Did you find that an inspiring post?
Friday, October 08, 2010
We end happiness week with a question. It's a very important question. Just what are you waiting for, anyway? Why aren't you happy NOW?
I'll bet you have a lot of excuses. We all do. One of the best things to do with negative thoughts is to turn them into positive thoughts. So let's look at a few common thoughts about why you aren't happy now.
I'm too fat
You're here on SP, right? You're taking your baby steps towards losing that weight. Tell yourself that you are working towards a healthy weight.
I don't have any friends
Happiness comes from within. It doesn't come from your SO, your family, your friends, or your animals. Sure, all those things can help you to feel happy. But the truth is that you are totally responsible for your won happiness. Just smile at yourself. You physically can't be sad when you're smiling at yourself.
I'm too poor
There's no question that not having enough money is stressful. But be honest with yourself: do you have enough for the basics? Food, shelter, medical care, insurance? Will more truly make you happy? And if you don't have enough for the basics, are you healthy? Do you have friends and family? Focus on what you DO have, not what you don't have, and think of what you can do to improve your situation -- maybe a different job, maybe more training so you can get a better job, maybe simply asking for help.
I hate my house, where I live, my SO (fill in the blank)
Change it. You have the power. And if it's something you truly can't change -- for instance, at the moment we are living in a place we really don't want to be living in -- you can still choose to be happy. Smile. Smiles are powerful. Turn those negatives into positives. Embrace what you don't like about it. And remember it's only your thoughts about it that make it bad.
I'm too ugly
Lola is a very good cute. Chester is too, but people are often very taken with Lola. I like to say beauty is as beauty does, a la Forrest Gump. We all know beautiful people who are ugly inside, and ugly people who are beautiful inside. Besides, as I pointed out yesterday, beauty fades. It's a really poor way to define yourself. Again, smile at yourself. It really does wonders for you.
I could never run, do a marathon, learn a new language, etc.
See my spark buddy's KEAKMAN's blog yesterday. And I love her father's saying -- "can't never tried". We all have things we think we can't do. We all think just doing those things would make us happy, but what happens when you accomplish that goal? Of course you're happy, but for how long?
I am NOT saying you shouldn't reach for the stars. Of course you should! Just realize that again, happiness comes from within. You are not your job, your salary, your medals. You are you. You are happy right now, if you let yourself be.
I didn't set out to make this happiness week, it just sort of happened. One blog just led to another. Sometimes I'm full of good ideas, so many I have to write them down on a calendar, and other days I couldn't come up with an idea to save my soul.
So what are you waiting for? Why aren't you happy right now, right this very minute?
Finally, a question. It's on my friend feed, too. Have you read a great book recently? I'm trying to decide what I want to put on my Kindle for my upcoming vacation. I'm toying with the idea of Edgar Sawtelle. I was going to get it from the library at some point, but I'm taking ideas here. I might just buy a few of my favorite books -- I often take old favorites on vacation cause you never know what you're going to like, no matter how many people tell you it's great.
I saw that Bill Bryson has a new book out too, and I really enjoy his books, so I might go with that (altho that will never last me 10 days and 2 long flights).
We are going to Kauai, and I love to read books about and/or by local authors, so if anyone has a recommendation there I'm all ears, too.
But I haven't decided yet. Obviously.
Thursday, October 07, 2010
A while ago one of the blogs I read talked about a size healthy. How she literally wrote over the size tag in her jeans in indelible ink with that phrase.
Well, I want to take that one step further and be a size happy. Health is important. If you're in this to be a certain size or look a certain way, then the sad truth is you're probably doomed to failure because the truth is that beauty fades. Did you catch the Oprah with Terri Hatcher?
I suppose I can be happy that I am not the head-turning type and never was!
And this time has been different all along, because while the smaller clothes and looking better are nice -- I won't lie! -- I've been in it for the health aspects all along. Because I didn't like the way I felt at a larger size. Not just the clothes thing, but the energy thing, the low self confidence thing.
And as I get nearer to my goal, I realize that if you don't have a size happy you'll probably never be a size healthy. Because sometimes even health isn't in our control. There are still diseases, no matter how healthy you eat or how much you exercise; there are accidents.
We can't control our health all together, beauty fades . . . but we can control how we feel about it all. We can choose to be happy, the majority of the time. We can control our own thoughts about ourselves.
If you think weight loss is only about dropping pounds, eating right, and exercising the right amount, then you're probably doomed to failure in the long run. Because where the mind goes, the body follows. You've got to get your mind right.
So that is my new goal: a size happy. A size healthy (and a literally smaller size) are just the side benefits.
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
I remember struggling with those last 10 pounds when I became a WW lifetime member, but I don't really remember a plateau. Maybe I have just blocked it from my mind.
About 10 years ago, I made another serious attempt to get back to my (newly revised) GW. I did well at first, then hit a year-long plateau. At about the same weight I'm at now. I got frustrated, stopped attending meetings . . . and well, we all know how that turned out. Back to my starting weight all those years ago plus some.
I have been on a plateau for a year now. And I got to thinking today just what that plateau has taught me.
Oddly enough, I think it's teaching me to be happy with myself. Yes, this is my happiness blog week apparently. It's on my mind.
Sure, I get down on myself sometimes. I get frustrated sometimes. I want to change what I see sometimes.
I never really stopped to think about what this plateau has been teaching me til today. And I realized that the happiness has outweighed the frustration. That I've learned that I can maintain my weight, with hard work and focus -- and that is a comforting thought. Because when I do get down to my GW, I know the hard work doesn't stop. It never stops. It will never be easy.
This plateau is teaching me to be happy NOW, today, not someday when _____ (you fill in the blank). It's teaching me that I am not a number -- I am so much more than a number.
I am a runner; something I never thought I would be. I am a teacher. I am a motivator (no, you don't have to be tiny to be a motivator -- nor do you have to be pollyanna. You just have to be real). I am a person who is worthwhile no matter what some scale might say.
I have a document that I downloaded some time ago that is a series of essays. I have put it in on my Kindle, and I read an essay every morning. They are motivational essays. Guess what today's essay was?
Finding happiness in life.
And I wanted to share with you the magic formula:
Your thoughts lead to your emotions which lead to your actions which produce your results.
To use that formula, ask yourself Who do you have to be (thoughts/emotions) and what do I have to do (actions) to have (results) happiness in my life?
Powerful stuff, people. This was part of a package I bought from www.eatingforenergy.ca/ . No, I don't get paid anything for passing this along. Yes, I actually think the price is a bit inflated.
But you know what? It's also something I turn to again and again. If you are interested in raw foods, I definitely think it's something to consider. I've tried a few other packages, but this is the one I use a lot. But I'm not trying to sell you anything, truly, this just happened to be what I read this morning, and it was so powerful and so in line with my thoughts, I knew I had to pass it along.
So my final thoughts on my plateau? As frustrating as it can be and is sometimes, I also think just maybe it is prepping me for the second half of my life. To live it more fully and with more happiness. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!
And if you're maintaining your GW and happy, we still want to hear from you!
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