Monday, September 27, 2010
I love it when the universe aligns itself for you. It's so easy to notice the negative we have a tendency to gloss over the positive.
I stopped at Sports Authority last week. I need more running tops for cooler weather. Last year I tried running outside for the very first time I think in November -- my one & only time that year! This year I intend to be running outside deeper into the winter. But I need proper gear. I have some, but not enough.
I found 2 tops I fell in love with. One was just perfect -- it had everything I love: a half zip, thumbholes, and a pocket. The other was a sort of sweatshirt, also with thumbholes, and lots of zipper pockets.
Neither was on sale. They weren't going anywhere -- there were at least a couple of smalls & mediums in both. I left empty handed; they were both pretty pricey. But I went home and got online and found a decent coupon for the store. That was part of what I wanted to do Friday when I couldn't get out.
So I went Saturday. Next Saturday's race looks to be cool, which is why I didn't want to wait for a sale (plus sometimes when I wait for a sale, my size is gone).
I dithered about the sweatshirt. Wasn't really sure I'd run in it, even tho it says right inside running! In the end, I bought it.
And I'm glad I did, cause it was absolutely perfect for my early morning swimming date this morning. Lots of zippered pockets so I could stow keys, cell phone, license. Even a hoodie that sort of zips into the collar (and it was sprinkling this morning). I'm so glad I bought it!
Swimming was good. I found the pool without too much trouble. DH said the dogs didn't bat an eyelid when I left this morning, which is also good. They're used to me going out early to run, but not to the sound of the garage door opener early in the morning!
The worst part of it is that by the time I finished the high school girls were in the locker room. So there I was stripping for a bunch of thin high school girls -- everyone's worst nightmare, right? Well, of course it made me uncomfortable, but it's a small price to pay to be able to swim inexpensively!
Yeah girls, take a good gander (which they didn't, thankfully), cause you might look like this in 30 years!
I thought getting out of there might be difficult as there was a small army of parents dropping off their kids, but it wasn't a problem at all. Everyone seemed to want to turn into the parking lot I was trying to turn out of, so that made it easy.
I am so thankful that this is available to me! It will be harder to motivate myself as the weather gets colder & colder, but it's not the first time I've gone swimming (inside) in frigid weather. Just not so early!
On the bad news front, the pain in my butt seemed to be getting better, only now it seems to have migrated. I was doing lots of stretching for what I thought the problem was, plus making sure to squat rather than bend over (which I have a bad habit of doing), and it really seemed to be helping. Only now there are some new twinges.
I'm hoping the cross training with the swimming will really help clear all that up -- eventually. Just keep me ok til Saturday, and next week I planned a week off of running anyway!
So how bout you. Do you notice it when the universe aligns itself to give you want you truly desire? Do you spend time visualizing what you want (I do!)? Are you grateful when it happens?
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Not long ago I blogged about how we are all mammals -- that dogs do what they get rewarded for, and we do too.
Today I'm taking the opposite stance.
Yesterday, my cats caught and killed a chipmunk. They had just eaten their breakfast. They weren't hungry -- and they didn't really fight me after I took their "toy" away from them (it was still alive at that point, and I was hopeful that it wasn't seriously injured).
Yes, it made me very sad -- and angry at them, despite the fact that I know they were just being cats. Cats are hard wired to hunt, whether they are hungry or not, because you never know how long you might have to go between meals and whether or not the next hunt will be successful.
Ok, so in that way, we ARE like animals -- one reason it's so hard to lose weight is that we are hard wired to want to hold onto our fat stores in case of famine.
OTOH, cats don't eat because they're angry or sad (altho they may eat if they're bored).
Still, how many times have you had the urge to eat despite just having had a plentiful meal? Or the need for dessert when you're not really hungry? The feeling that a meal isn't a meal unless it's ended by a sweet?
Next time it happens, ask yourself if you're an animal. And if it offends you to be compared to an animal, maybe that's actually a good thing.
I said a prayer for that little chipmunk. I told him I was so sorry that he had to die like that. I took him away from the cats, and put him out on the lawn. I petted him a bit, told him how sorry I was, and then left him alone, hoping he was just stunned and would go off on his own. But when I went back to check, he was dead. I don't know if it would have been better to stay with him, or if that would have just been more scary for him.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
So my emotional stress didn't lead me to overeat yesterday, but I was hungry earlier than DH wanted to eat. Tried munching on some cherry tomatoes, which didn't do the trick. Managed to hold out to dinner.
Only problem was that I was still hungry after dinner & dessert (a planned-for dessert). I was going to eat a dark chocolate Hershey's Kiss. Just one. 25 calories. .5 WW points. I wasn't planning to log it, either, for the simple reason that I'd already eaten plenty for the day.
But I thought about it. Would it fill me up? No, absolutely not. Was I really craving chocolate? No, not so much. Did I truly need more food? Well, sort of, but I also thought about my goal.
I lost half a pound this week, even with TOM arriving on WI day. I will never figure out why sometimes I lose that week, and other times I gain. I didn't eat that great this week. Not terribly, but there were some BLTs in there. And no pushups. Sorry, dayhiker. Progress, not perfection.
One of those BLTs was a biggie: a bag of sweet potato & beet chips over 2 days. Not so much a bite lick or taste!
But that half pound got me to thinking. What if I lost half a pound every week? I could be at my GW in 20 weeks. Less than half a year. What if I lost 1 pound every week? I could be at my GW in less than 3 months -- by the end of the year!
I'm not sure I've ever really looked at it that way. Silly, but there you have it. It's kind of inspiring. I'm not sure how long I can hold on to that inspiration, but for now, I'm going to run with it.
Summer is over. Summer with its loose fitting shorts and skirts and dresses. Now it's on to semi-tight jeans, which don't let you get away with as much.
I know, without a doubt, that I still do want to lose those last 10 lbs. There are still photos of myself that make me cringe. And yeah, I know, there will probably always be photos of myself that will make me cringe no matter what my weight, but I also know that I want to be a size healthy.
Let me say it again, because it's important:
I want to be a size healthy.
What you believe, you can achieve (I've been collecting mantras lately. May change my sparkpage title to this).
I believe that I can be a size healthy -- and maintain it. All it will take is a little focus, and maybe half a pound a week. Ya with me?
Remember: progress, not perfection. Step away from the kisses!
Friday, September 24, 2010
Warning: long rant ahead.
Today started off well. Got up early for my run (ok, woke up way too early actually & couldn't fall back asleep, but whatever), walked the dogs, did some raking (just raked a couple of days ago -- you'd never know it now).
Caught up with some of my shows. Ate lunch. And then prepared to go out shopping.
Now, most people with dogs just leave. Not me, I have prima donnas. First, set the tv to a music station. Take them outside -- the music cues them that I'm leaving, so hopefully they'll do their business, which they did. Put them in their crates, put peanut butter on the ends of their kongs, give them the kongs and then leave.
Why the whole process? Because Chester had severe separation anxiety as a puppy. I was almost a prisoner in my own home. It took a lot of work to get past it, but now I can at least go out -- following the whole procedure, of course.
Anyway, everything was going well til I tried to open the garage door. Would go up about halfway and then stop. Kept trying -- this has happened before and sometimes you've just got to try a few times. No go. Looked to see if something is blocking it -- nothing I can see.
So frustrated that I now unlatch it and try to open the door manually. It still won't open! Obviously something is blocking it somewhere but I can't for the life of me figure out what it is. Hence the I'm not mechanically inclined title.
Call DH. He is annoyed, and offers to come home, but clearly doesn't want to. Truly, would it kill him? He's only about 15 minutes away. I need to get new sheets cause ours are so threadbare they now have a couple of rips in them. I thought I already had some new sheets bought a while ago, but if I do, I cannot find them (I mean, like bought back when we lived in Austin -- for just such an eventuality).
I wanted to get out to buy new sheets. I don't rotate sheets, I just strip the bed, wash the bedding, then remake the bed. That way I don't ever have to fold up sheets!
So I tell DH no, obviously he doesn't have to come home -- all the while of course wanting him to come home. It would be less an interruption of his day then this has interrupted mine. I had a couple other stores I wanted to hit up. Not to mention now I've totally wasted a couple of kongs. And I've got to make up more kongs cause those were the last 2 of the premade ones.
He will, no doubt, see in 2 seconds what the heck is blocking it. Thank God this didn't happen while he was away (altho this time he got a ride to the airport and I had his car available to me as well). Or God forbid when my parents were here, and then I'd have to be in the car with my Dad (who is 84 yrs old) driving.
Please don't bother with suggestions for things to look at -- the moment has already passed. I'm just pissed about it now.
I don't like to give the dogs 2 kongs in one day -- go out twice -- unless I really have to. Lola could probably do it no problem, but Chester is like me -- he puts on weight really easily and I have to watch what I feed him.
Well, the good news is that it didn't make me want to eat at all. I've got laundry in the washer now, something I wouldn't have time for if I'd gone out.
DH says I can go tonight, but frankly, by then I really don't want to be shopping. I get up early. I'm tired by the time dinner is over -- getting dinner for us, getting dinner for the animals -- all those things he hates to do & doesn't cause he has a "real" job.
And the truth is that I have a good life, and I am mostly appreciative of that. But I also want to feel appreciated. I do sometimes -- but not always, and this is one of those times I'm not feeling real appreciated.
Sorry for blathering on about it for so long. Guess I'll have to tackle other stuff on my to-do list now.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
So today I ran/walked about 5 1/4 miles. It's the farthest I've ever run. I chose to do it on my treadmill, as I can control how fast I go and actually know how far I've run. I'm sure a Garmin is in my future, but for now, that's what I've got. I do run outside, too, but choose to do my long runs on my treadmill.
So another title I thought of was "why exercise can cause weight gain".
Because sometimes it makes you damn hungry! I planned out my day, knowing that a) I needed to fuel during my run, because it would take me more than an hour (yes, I'm that slow) & b) I need something easy on the stomach for after my run.
I chose to have pancakes this morning. High protein, whole grain, healthy pancakes. I nibbled on a larabar during the run (nuts + dates should be as good as sport beans or shots or bloks or whatever, I figured). I drank almost 2 cups of water as I ran.
I had a recovery smoothie/milkshake all planned for after the run. 2 frozen bananas, some kale, 1 tbsp agave nectar, a pinch of salt, 1 cup almond milk. Really does taste almost like a milkshake, you get some greens in, and some easily digestible protein.
Only I was still hungry afterwards. It's only 5 miles, for cryin' out loud, you'd think I'd run a marathon or at the very least a half marathon!
And this is why people training for marathons sometimes gain weight. It's so easy to have IDI syndrome (I Deserve It) when you're working out that hard. It's funny, sometimes hard exercise suppresses my appetite, and sometimes it awakes the raging beat.
I had half an Ezekiel english muffin with dark chocolate almond spread (OMG, talk about something really dangerous). Hopefully that will hold me til dinner! I'd planned all the rest in, the muffin + almond spread is extra -- I shouldn't really be over my points, but it'll still be a very high day.
DH & I had a great 4 days together before he had to go back to work this morning. Sometimes it's hard to get back into a rhythm, and other times everything just works.
We finally saw "Inception", which we both thoroughly enjoyed. DH got his lobster, I got my sushi. Yesterday we took a trip out to the falls I've been wanting to see. Even with low water, they're pretty damn impressive.
There's also a long stairways down to the riverbed, and the dogs were real troopers. Must've seemed like Mt. Everest to them -- even my calves are speaking to me today.
We also managed to find the nature preserve I went hunting for while he was gone, only to turn back after maybe 1/4 mile because now I know where all the mosquitos in NY state are hiding out. It was HORRIBLE! I couldn't take it. I'm sure the big ole stagnant canal there was the culprit. Which is really too bad, because otherwise it would be a good place to go trail running.
We ended up going back to the walking path I discovered instead.
We grilled a steak from the farmer's market, I roasted the first brussel sprouts of the season, and we grilled some corn, too, and ate outside on the deck. And DH asked for another birthday cupcake. I always know something is good when he asks for it, but I told him I personally didn't think he should have it with the rich dinner we had -- but he's a big boy & could make his own decision (which he did -- any guesses?).
The cupcake was, at least, vegan. Which doesn't mean it was low fat or low sugar by any means. At least it actually had real fruit in it -- black forest cupcakes.
Does hard exercise make you hungry? How do you handle it when you're hungry and you know you shouldn't be eating so much?
Do you have a favorite fuel for your runs? Ever dabbled in any home made fuel options?
What about your recovery meal?
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