Friday, March 12, 2010
Wait, did I really think that? Why yes, I did. If only the rest of the day had gone as well.
Basically I maintained this week (up a tiny bit, but while I pay attention to that, I never really consider that to be "up" -- could just be a heavier breakfast, heavier clothes, etc., altho there were no barettes invited to the WI yesterday).
And the hungries/cravings continued yesterday. They handed out chocolate pretzel bar samples at the meeting . . . I didn't eat it then, I had my apple & my Luna protein bar that I brought with me. Yet after shopping I ate the pretzel bar, too. Maybe the Luna bar got me craving sugar? Because I was sure craving it the rest of the day.
Came home, had my nice planned healthy lunch, then had 1 Kashi cookie.
Had my nice planned healthy dinner, then had 2 of the chocolate peanut butter bars (about the size of a truffle, they're not full bars) DH brought me from Seattle.
I'm not sure if I got into a "well, I'm gaining weight despite my best efforts (or not losing, take your pick) so I mayt as well eat" frame of mind. Instead of "I'd like to thank the academy", I'd like to blame my hormones, but there are no excuses. Hormones ebb and flow every month and we've just got to learn how to ebb and flow with them instead of blaming them and excusing ourselves from all responsibility.
Now, the one thing I am proud of is that I may have eaten more than I planned to, and most of the extra food I ate was junk, but I ate it all mindfully, and enjoyed it. So it's done. Today is a new day with new choices. I will see if I can figure out what's going on, because if I can't figure out the WHY, how can I ever hope to change the behavior?
Do you feel guilty after you give in to cravings? Do you try to figure out just what prompted those cravings in the first place? Ever find yourself actually craving healthy food? Or chasing said healthy food craving with something not so healthy?
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Even after a couple of years, it's hard. I hate the hungry days. You know them -- the normal things don't fill you up. You don't feel emotional, you're just HUNGRY with a capital H (obviously).
My hungry day troubleshooter:
Have I drunk enough water? Y
Have I eaten enough fruits/veggies? Y
Have I eaten enough protein? Y
Have I actually just eaten enough? Y
Am I tired? No more than usual
Would I eat an apple?
Well, that last one gets a no. The point being if you're truly hungry, you'll eat anything, i.e., it's not a craving.
Yes, I was craving last night. AND hungry. Today is WI. Why does it seem I always get really hungry right before WI? Only that's not true, but sometimes it feels like it.
I was craving something sweet. Chocolate & PB were calling my name, and I have several chocolate & PB stuff around just waiting to be eaten. Only they'll have to wait a bit longer. I decided that that wouldn't fill me up -- yes, I really was hungry, despite the fact that I'd eaten what I'd planned and it really ought to be filling (and had already had an apple earlier in the day, thank you very much).
I went with my banana "ice cream" sundae. Home made banana ice cream that is mostly frozen banana. Raw chocolate sauce. Cacao nibs. A little bit of truwhip. I'd planned on having one several times this week, but when the end of the day rolled around, I never could quite "afford" one.
But I was trying hard to listen to my body; to determine what it really wanted. And that is what it wanted (besides chocolate, chocolate, and some chocolate on top of the chocolate -- yes, it is my hungry time of the month as well).
Whether I could "afford" it or not this was what I wanted. So I ate it. Mindfully. With no regrets. And chased it with a Hershey's dark chocolate kiss (despite choosing to have a couple after lunch, too -- not a reward for my long walk, just because that was what my body wanted).
So today is WI. I am so close to moving that ticker. I might have just been able to do it if I hadn't forgotten my barette last week. Don't laugh -- that sucker is welded wire with a stone in it. The good news is my WI jeans feel loose this morning. That doesn't always mean anything. But I'm hopeful, and if it's not meant to be, that's ok too.
Do you trust the process? Do yo listen to your body, even when it's demanding more than you think it needs, or more than you had planned for? Or have you forgotten the number to your body?
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
I "stole" that from my buddy Besshalie's blog. What an insight, huh? So simple. So true.
While I had planned to get skating in one last time this week, it was just not meant to be. Monday was grocery shopping. Tuesday we had an unexpected meeting in the evening in our house, which required a lot of picking up on my part -- totally my fault, stuff I'd procrastinated on.
Tomorrow is my WW meeting. And hopefully they will be dropping off the kitchen cabinets tomorrow afternoon, and installing them Friday.
Which left today. Only today is gorgeous. We're not seeing the 60s and above some of you are, but still, it was warm enough to walk the dogs without boots & a coat -- finally! -- and it's supposed to start raining on Thursday and go on right through the weekend.
So I chose to take the dogs to the park for a nice, long walk today. It was too nice to be in a skating rink. The dogs haven't had a walk like this since November.
I went back & forth in my mind over bringing a couple of Hershey's dark chocolate kisses. I ran outside for almost 45 minutes yesterday, and as it turned out, we walked for about an hour today. I deserved it, didn't I?
I didn't take the kisses. Good thing, too, because I started to get hungry while walking. If I'd had them, I'd have eaten them. And it would have been a little instant gratification but no lasting joy. I'd start to feel guilty, no dobut, about those kisses shortly after eating them.
I don't know why we think we have to fuel all exercise. It's the reason people sometimes gain weight while training for a marathon: they totally give themselves permission to eat whatever they want because they're training hard.
Well, a 5k run or an hour walk with the dogs isn't training hard. It's good exercise, but it's not like I'm totally depleting my stores of energy and therefore have to refuel immediately.
I think if you're eating well, for most of us the need for a pre or post-workout snack is a myth. If you're truly training hard (like for a marathon), it's a different story. Even then it's real easy to give yourself permission to go overboard.
Still, I try to listen to my body too. I truly was hungry. Yes, I'd had a snack, but as it turns out, it was later than I thought it was. I shouldn't have been that hungry, but that just says to me maybe my snack wasn't enough for me THIS day.
And this is what happens when you write a blog off the top of your head most times -- totally all over the place, making several points badly rather than one point well.
Anyway, do you think you give yourself permission to eat too often when you exercise? Does exercise suppress your appetite, or does it make you hungrier? How often do you give in to the instant gratification of food, of new clothes (or new books or new exercise DVDs or whatever your achilles' heel is -- mine is all of the above!)? Do you think you'd find more lasting joy if you didn't give in to that little voice saying "feed me, seymour!"?
Tuesday, March 09, 2010
Since I thought my last few blogs were kind of weighty (pun intended), I thought it was time for a little fun. Let's see if I can actually pull this off, it's all off the top of my head.
You might be a foodie if . . .
. . . the cookbooks in your house outnumber the regular books
. . . you actually READ cookbooks, all the way thru. More than once
. . . you spend almost as much time hunting down new, cool stuff at the grocery store as you do shopping for new, cool clothes
. . . you don't blink twice at spending $20 in shipping to get cool food you can't get locally
. . . you can tell your husband how many tablespoons in half a cup without having to look it up
. . . you get as excited about a new nutrition bar find as you do about winning the lottery
. . . you have eaten alligator, frog's legs, snake, and know what durian is
. . . you choose more new recipes to try each week than you can possibly actually cook
. . . you preorder the next cookbook from your favorite author
Ok foodies, help me flesh out my list!
So what about you? Are you a foodie? Can you remember desserts from 20 years ago (but certainly not your address back then)? Do the sounds coming out of your mouth when you eat sound like they ought to be coming out of the bedroom?
Monday, March 08, 2010
This month's Fitness Magazine has an article called "Confessions of a Cardioholic" and evne tho I was already aware of my own tendencies, it definitely hit close to home.
In it, they talk about exercise dependency. Here are a few questions that can help you determine if you're overly dependent on exercise:
Feel a constant obligation to work out? Y
Feel guilty or ashamed when you can't exercise? Y
Compromise your safety to work out (i.e., working outside alone at night because you "have to")? N
Exercise even when you're sick or fatigued? N
Find yourself constantly nursing an injury? N
Experience irregular or absent periods? N
Need more exercise to get the same effects as before? N
Put exercise before family, friends or work? Maybe
Hear family & friends expressing concerns about your exercise habits? N
So even tho I answered no to most of the questions, the article says if you answer yes to ANY of the questions you may want to think about how your exercise is effecting your life.
It's such a fine line between enough and too much. I do feel driven to complete my exercise plan each week. I don't feel right if I don't exercise every day. Part of the way I think I'm going to kick this plateau is by active rest -- on the weekends I didn't used to get my 10,000 steps in sometimes. My walks with the dogs are often shorter because DH won't walk as long.
So now I usually hop on the treadmill in the morning and walk while DH is still snoozing. At an easy pace.
And I do feel driven to get my 10,000 steps in. Which is why yesterday, despite having walked the dogs for about 50 minutes in the morning and then done a 40 minute yoga DVD, I went for a run.
Altho it's never that simple. I was going to try to talk DH into a second walk with the dogs, but frankly, I was surprised that he walked as long as he did both days this weekend -- longer than he normally walks for.
I could've gotten on the treadmill, but it was just too nice out. So I decided to go for a run outside. My first since my first run outside way back in November. I made sure to go really slow, and I was able to run the entire time (minus the warm up & cool down, of course).
OTOH, I am very mindful of all my spark buddies who have injured themselves from pushing too hard, too soon. I was wary of trying to fit in the ice skating and the run on Friday. I don't want to injure myself. But I wanted to see if I could do both. And the run did actually energize me. Which I suppose is part of the equation -- if it had exhausted me, it would have been too much. But how could I know that before hand?
My appetite is pretty much the same whether I exercise or not. So I have to admit that I'm afraid if I take a complete rest day (no active rest) that I will continue to stall or gain.
I felt guilty when I didn't get my 10,000 steps in on the day I shoveled the driveway for 2 hours. But I did, at least, recognize that I'd already gotten enough exercise even with such a puny amount of steps. It was hard work shoveling a foot of snow! And I did lose weight that week.
So it's such a fine line. And this is just a crazy blog for me, the former couch potato, to write!
So how bout you. Do you feel dependent on exercise? Do you WISH you could feel dependent on exercise? Do you think you overdo it in the exercise department? Or do you feel you have a healthy relationship with exercise?
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