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Why Am I Visible To You Now That I Lost Weight?

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

"Hello, can I help you find something?", the employee at the clothing store said to me recently. In my mind I was thinking, 'wait, I know you. I have been coming to buy stuff here (i.e. from YOU) for a long time, and yet you act like I am a real person now. I used to wander the freshly waxed floors down every aisle, asking aloud for help and you guys would continue your conversation, practically hiding from me.
Why do you approach me now? Was I invisible before when I was 30 lbs heavier? Was I not worthy of customer service?!?

Why do you make me feel like a freshly painted watercolor scene now, yet you made me feel like a blank canvas when I was heavier; void of life and color?

I didn't get some magically transforming hairstyle when I reached my goal weight, or spray tan myself into an orange frenzy (gooped up with layers of lip gloss perched on 6"platform heels). My point is that I was still the same ol' me. I had on jeans, a T-shirt, and my converse sneakers. There was nothing calling attention to me (or my body). I actually looked behind me to see if the salesperson was speaking to someone else. Nope, it was me.

The paranoid side of me wondered if this woman's manager was nearby (or perhaps freshly installed video cameras?), and that was the reason behind that ear to ear smile. It made me uncomfortable, so I left.

The guy at the farmer's market was a lot nicer to me than our last encounter months ago too. I bought the same items, but there seemed to be something different about his behavior towards me. Did I pick up on a genuine smile and sense of humor, when in the past I felt like I was wasting his time by asking if there was any more fennel? What's that about? Once again, no special bosom revealing outfit on my person, just casual stuff I threw on and my sneakers. These converse sneakers aren't magical - are they?

I should be proud of my weight loss; allowing myself that little extra shimmy when I walk, and flash my smile when I talk, but I found that these encounters actually made me more sensitive about my weight loss, and honestly, a bit angry.
Maybe I was having flashbacks of junior high school (since I was a huge goofball), and the cute boys didn't really see themselves with a girl who was a raging vegetarian and literally wore something with cow print on my body every single day. I know, strange right? Ha!

I had a 'heart to heart' discussion with my inner protester, and had her call off the picket lines against those who treat me differently than they did when I was heavier. After all, what would that prove, other than the fact that I clearly had let these people make me feel insecure about something I should be screaming from the rooftops with joy - I reached my weight goal with the help of SparkPeople!

I'll be going back to that clothing store and trying on clothes soon - 3 sizes smaller now - and enjoying my new / old body looking back at me in the changing room mirror.

Just don't get me started on how horrible fluorescent lighting can make ANYONE look though. If store owners want to sell their merchandise, perhaps they should stop designing changing rooms like a miniature hospital waiting room. E-gads!

'Nuff Said.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MILLIE5522 11/24/2011 3:16PM

    I have only just come across this blog, so apologies for the late comment. Just want to say that this is a great blog.....you are so right about feeling invisible when being overweight.
As for changing rooms....the Marks & Spencer's department stores in the UK have mirrors on all sides which is REALLY scary! emoticon

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RHMORTON 11/22/2011 12:47PM

  Ur right. People do treat u different. Sad but true.

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MISSLISA1973 11/11/2011 10:21PM

    Sad but true. Boo.

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    It makes me angry too, but people who look nicer get treated better.
I go to the store in sweats looking like a hot mess. Man enters the grocery store ahead of me but lets the door slam in my face instead of even holding the door open for five seconds.
Next day, I go to store dressed very nicely in a skirt and dress shoes, makeup done, etc. A man ahead of me will see me coming from 100 yards away and will stand there with the door open for 60 freaking seconds to hold the door for me while I awkwardly shuffle faster to keep him for holding the damn thing open so long.

Is this fair? No. Does it happen? Totally.

Try this as a test.

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HELLAS2 11/4/2011 7:33AM

    Great Blog

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H-DOG-8 10/29/2011 8:02PM

    I'm glad you called off your inner protestor by the end of the post! Sometimes you just need to vent, and then reassess and realize it's not worth your time to hold on to the negative feelings from others. You're far to awesome to let them get you down! And your attitude is always way too positive....in fact, I predicted a happy ending as soon as I started reading! Go back and shop my dear! Nothing should keep a woman from shopping.... ;)

Great post!

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CTUPTON 10/29/2011 7:01AM

    Here is the other side of the coin: For awhile now I have "put on a happy face" and actually feel confident sometimes --even at my present weight. I am a little mentally different and have somewhat accepted myself. I am pleasantly surprised that people in stores are more friendly to me now. For the first half of my life I blamed everything on my weight. But a co-worker said her family were all larger than me and happy and did not worry about it! She said I was fine and looked good! HUH? What an awakening for me. It got me thinking that maybe it wasn't my weight but my attitude. Since then I have tried to "just be me" with a much more confident attitude. And in one of my blogs I describe "being hit on" in a local restaurant. How titillating! I couldn't believe it! I was wearing something I never wear in public--a clingy light blue top that showed cleavage. Now looking slutty isn't exactly a great way to get noticed, but it showed me that my fat wasn't as important as I thought.Chris

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CTUPTON 10/29/2011 6:50AM

    Wonderfully expressed! Often I have felt invisible and ignored in stores. Invisible is a perfect word for that. I have wondered about this, too.And I have felt hurt. Chris

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MALKS_ARIA 10/29/2011 1:08AM

    Goodness.... I am totally coming to the thought that "Invisible" is a way of life for some people... and treating us as "invisible" makes it easier for them.... but sadly, they miss a lot of great people that way, with really great hearts...

Keep up your good attitude, and yeah, if you go back.... spread the Spark, and Shout it from the Dressing Room, that SP helped and You cherish yourself enough to take steps to get healthy!! :)

You mean that flickering dull blue lights isn't the best color for trying things on?!?! Really!?!? Hold on... can I get you to repeat that in front of a mirror with Florescent lights flickering?!?! Let me Video Tape that ... and submit it to those who don't seem to care, but to take our money.....


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RYDERB 10/26/2011 11:55AM

    You are BEAUTIFUL! Your smile is SO bright that it lights up this Spark World! So I can only imagine what it would be like for that sales woman, or the farmer's market guy to see it in person. If they didn't notice you before, they MUST have needed glasses! Maybe they finally got them. Ha!
Obviously, you're making a valid point, people are discriminated against daily for all sorts of things, weight included, but sometimes, when we're not feeling our best, we perceive a situation more negatively. Before I allow myself to get upset or have my feelings hurt, by something another person has or hasn't done, I remind myself that I have no idea what's going on in that other person's life. Maybe the sales person that just walked away from me, as I was calling out "excuse me" really needed to pee! (I've definitely been there) emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/26/2011 11:56:13 AM

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LGAR519 10/26/2011 11:01AM

    What a great Blog!! I have often felt this way but couldn't express it. People have always treated me like I didn't exsist. Like I wasn't REAL. But then again, maybe it's just my imagination!! I'm so glad you have lost 30 pounds. I'm pulling for you.

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HAPPYLOSER46 10/26/2011 10:55AM

    I do find that people with weight on them do get treated differently sometimes, than "average" sized individuals. I'm happy I've never treated anyone differently because of what they look like, thin/overweight, rich/poor, whatever. I don't understand the mindset of those that do. I just don't "get" them. They are the ones with the problem.

You are looking fabulous! I know this is wrong..but I think I might pull a Julia Roberts on them (from Pretty Woman)...j/k! It would be a hoot, though! hehe But, remember, they are to be pitied because they don't have good character!

Enjoy your new look and life and smile from ear to ear at them when you go into the store, happy with yourself that you're not like them! emoticon

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SUNFLOWER4ME 10/26/2011 10:17AM

    Firstly, I think yous a look darn sexy with an orange spray tan and 6 in platform heels emoticon. Secondly, you go to a farmer's market! That's grrrrrreat emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon and Thirdly, girl you BEAUTIFUL and SKINNY! Of COURSE people are going to look at you. Now, is it right that they look at you more now then they did 30lbs ago? No. But that's how we are sometimes. Don't let it bring you down! emoticon

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LESLIELENORE 10/26/2011 9:02AM

    I need to get a pair of converse! I have lost almost 60 lbs, but I still have a ways to go to get to my goal, and I am still pretty invisible in stores. I know I smile more and I am more approachable than I used to be, but I still have to hunt for assistance in stores. I could totally relate to how you were feeling though. When I was skinny I had no trouble getting help. I am so impressed... 3 sizes smaller! WTG!

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    It sucks that people who are thinner or prettier are often treated better...we are all here to lose weight and improve our health...but we shouldn't have to do that to gain respect.

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MEDDYPEDDY 10/26/2011 1:02AM

    This is a problem to me - not because of losing weight but because of getting employed as a business editor of a local newspaper. Suddenly everybody wants me to be around and everybody is very nice to me... and as it happened I told myself not to forget that it is my position they are liking, not me. But I have gotten used to it and I don´t think about it any more but take it for granted. It will be a shoch when I retire and nobody wants me around anymore...

I usually get the attention I need at stores - but maybe it is because I never wait to see if somebody volunteers... as a young girl at dances I learned that if I was going to wait for somebody to ask me to dance, I would not dance at all. So I quickly started asking myself, the trick was to do it before I noticed that I was not asked, because if I noticed, I would lose confdence and not dare to ask... the downside on that is that I assumed that nobody ever wants me around...

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PURESTILLWATER 10/26/2011 12:29AM

    I can totally relate to this Bren. People totally treat you differently. Great post.

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1HAPPYWOMAN 10/26/2011 12:26AM

    The same thing happened to me! I got really pissed off about how much nicer the coffee shop guy was to me, and my friend said the same things that Cannie wrote. It's probably some of both: we're more positive and confident now, AND some people are nicer and more attentive when you weigh less.
It's wonderful that you're so sensitive to the nuances of interactions. Then you can write about it and get us all thinking. I liked what that other commenter said, about how your blog made her question the way she relates to people with different body sizes. I'm going to look at that too, because it's subtle thing that could bear some closer examination.

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OOLALA53 10/25/2011 11:44PM

    Bravo! also made me wonder who I am ignoring because they don't fit my image somehow.In any case, revel in the changes you've made to your habits that brought about this new body. emoticon

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DANCINGRITA2 10/25/2011 11:29PM

    I'm impressed!!!If I keep on I'll find a mirror like that one myself. emoticon emoticon Rita

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THEFITNUTLIFE 10/25/2011 11:12PM

    First - I'm so sorry you had to suffer because of those people's insensitivity and rudeness. Second - I'm very glad you're doing so well with your weightloss. 30 lbs is a huge accomplishment! Third - I Love your attitude and the fact you won't let these people's carelessness derail you. emoticon

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CLOVER2 10/25/2011 10:52PM

    I know how you feel, there have been times where I get the distinct impression that others feel as though we are "catching" and if they get too close the fat cells will cluster and throw themselves onto and into anyone too close. It's embarrassing and disheartening, but I remember that those people aren't my friends, they are strangers and I feel sorry for them. To limit your world that way is sad. You and the others that have touched my life here are the ones that really count!
Love you!

Comment edited on: 10/25/2011 10:52:47 PM

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CRABADA 10/25/2011 10:46PM

    Congratulations on your success!

While I agree with Cannie that it *could* be that you're giving off a more approachable vibe, I also think being overweight does make us somehow invisible to others and it's just not right. So, if you're going back to that store, make sure you find another person to help you. :)

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HIPPIECHIC68 10/25/2011 10:45PM

    Glad you are doing well, my friend! I'm going to start wearing my magical converse more often!! HaHa... emoticon

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MAMADWARF 10/25/2011 10:44PM

    yea I have had that experience too. I just take it as a compliment and go on. You look awesome and have worked hard for those 3 sizes!!

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KIWI202 10/25/2011 10:03PM

    Congrats on your weight-loss and reaching your goal!

I haven't even reached my goal, but I notice subtle differences in the way people treat me as well. Sometimes I chock it up to a little more confidence, but sometimes that little voice argues. Either way, take pride in your achievement and shimmy in those jeans. . .3 sizes smaller!

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CANNIE50 10/25/2011 9:59PM

    Okay, just to play emoticon advocate, what if you are giving off a completely different vibe to people now that you are no longer uncomfortable about your weight? I know I am more approachable when I am feeling positive and comfortable, and I am more inclined to approach people who seem that way, as well. Just a thought, doll...............Either which way, you are quite adorable.

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    So true! Blows my mind.

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JENNYINAJIFFY 10/25/2011 9:22PM

    This is so true! What is up with that? Well, congratulations on the 30 pound loss! Way to go!


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Food on my mind (literally). Complete with parsley garnish...

Monday, October 17, 2011

One of my treasured Sparkly pals and I commiserated about how much food had been on our mind this past week - how it seems to be weighing on us. But I feel like food is LITERALLY on my brain, on my mind. Squishing down on me more so than usual. Can anyone else relate?

The food that is 'on my mind' seems to be very delicately arranged too; not spilling all over the place, the way too much salad dressing does on a small bed of lettuce...
We're talking a massive ice-cold silver platter, with all of my favorite food on display, complete with curly parsley garnish:
Double fried french fries, pasta carbonara, a miniature pyramid made form the darkest chocolate 'bricks'. Rum and banana's with a dollop of gooey nutella... and the food porn continues...

What does that food 'on your mind' translate to, and how do you push back against it to keep your healthy lifestyle in check?

Are some of you trying to balance an entire catering table filled with sterno heated troughs of beef and broccoli on one side and carrot cake on the other, like some Las Vegas all night buffet gone awry?

Perhaps a Medieval Times themed setting of food? A pewter platter piled high with turkey legs (ripped off the bird in a savage fashion) and herbed potatoes in between mountains of BBQ ribs, practically thrown in top of your mind - don't forget the ale!

How about a rustic Italian wooden platter with mounds of tortellini and ravioli oozing with prosciutto and parmesan. Fried calamari bits rolling into the gold colored lava of fresh polenta poured out from a huge pot high above. And don't forget the pizza's stacked high like a thick roll of quarters.

Honestly, I'd like this food on my mind to all be packed up To-Go.
As in, go away, go somewhere else far far away.
Wrap it up in a huge sheet of tin foil (shaped like a swan) and send it packing!

But then I think about how this road to my best-ever health is not an easy one, and that anything great is worth fighting for.
I'm also finally able to see AND acknowledge that I created the wonky-wired mindset that food is the enemy. I was not born with this, I did it to myself.
I created and nurtured a twisted vine-like relationship with food over the years, until I ended up jailing myself behind the overgrown thorns.

I have to keep reminding myself that I can overcome these things in time, but not overnight. And that's where all of you come on. Spark People continues to be an invaluable source of information, support and friendship.
I can share the ugly truth about the food on my mind, and Sparklers seem to come out of the woodwork to help me heave that figurative platter off into the distance, so I can focus on better things; the TRULY sweet things in life, right?

'Nuff said.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CTUPTON 10/23/2011 11:27AM

    What a great blog! I am always thinking of eating! Wish I could change that. Chris emoticon

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RYDERB 10/21/2011 11:27AM

    I'm glad I paid attention to that caution sign! Because I can definitely relate to this blog. Just seeing the words Pasta Carbonara got my mouth watering. Getting control and breaking free from all my food cravings, is something I'm struggling with everyday. Thank goodness for exercise, and all my Sparky friends. Stay strong. You can do it!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CANNIE50 10/19/2011 3:41PM

    Nice job on the blog - I especially like the part about building this crazy relationship with food. Sort of like, when I was 14 and "taught" myself to smoke - yikes. Quitting smoking and drinking were not as hard as changing my relationship with food, probably because this is the earliest habit and will be the one I will have, for better and worse, until I die. I cannot believe I am in my 50's and still behaving like an idiot with food. I am better now than I was, but I still have a long ways to go and, yes, I AM TIRED!

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MALKS_ARIA 10/18/2011 9:07PM

    wow, My mind went to all that food porn... and the nausea I have been battling tonight grew by leaps and bounds.... Which is very unusual for me! Enjoy your food porn, and maybe I will get to enjoy it some other time :)


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LGAR519 10/18/2011 3:11PM

    I am not a fan of good food. I have always favored junk food. For example: If I was offered a meal of meatloaf, green beans, mashed potatoes, and salad. I would turn it down in favor of ice cream, chocolate, pizza, etc. And I crave it constantly. Still!!

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WINACHST 10/18/2011 9:24AM

    I had to chuckle over the parsley garnish - The other day my husband and I went out to eat and there was parsley garnish on the plate and I thought, "This is something we don't see very often nowadays." Yes, it does take time and effort to retrain the tastebuds to enjoy a different type of food. But the benefits make it all worht while.
Thanks for the blog.

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MEDDYPEDDY 10/18/2011 12:34AM

    When I get in the mood of emotional eating there is no food that is tempting enough. That does not mean I do not overeat any longer but food has lost its imaginative power. I only wish that I could muster the power to stay away from the stuff that does not help me...

Interesting blog, it helped me, thanks!

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1HAPPYWOMAN 10/17/2011 10:31PM

    Food, how I love you! I am not ashamed of my love; food, glorious foooood, deserves a passionate admirer!

My problem with food arises when I revert to my old food-as-a-reward mindset. It helps to give myself a lot of non-food treats: fill up my evenings with visits to old friends, take naps, take time to write poetry. I know none of those things can be deep-fried, but they really do seem to help.

It really, really helps if I have things to be excited about -- and not manufactured excitement, but genuine, curling my toes excitement. Then the treat, guilt, misery, treat cycle just fades away!!!

You can do it, sweet pea!

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SUNFLOWER4ME 10/17/2011 9:09PM

    I absolutely relate, and sometimes the food in my mind becomes food in my belly emoticon. Just try to stay strong, and keep those mind foods out of house so they are out of mind. But yes, I feel you on this one. It's no fun, but it too will pass.

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Eggs, why do you piddle on my plate?

Friday, October 07, 2011

I've got this hare-brained theory that most of the healthy foods I try to incorporate into my meals tinkle / piddle / pee on my plate like my new puppy Olive.

For example, scrambled eggs are a fantastic source of lean protein - for about 60 seconds after being cooked. After that, I feel like they get upset from being neglected, and then morph into a bumpy mass, sitting in it's own pee. Yummm....?
I think that eggs need some 'produce sized' pull ups diapers.

My tofu seems to sit in its own tofu tinkle at all times too. I drain it, and it goes again (and again and again).

Tomatoes wizz all the time, and can ruin a pretty platter of caprese salad if not drained for a bit. Bring a spoon!

Pineapple really dumps it's produce puddle into the bowl, don't you think?

Watermelons dribble and spritz no matter which way you cut into them - and can be a disaster on a white dress shirt (I'm speaking from experience here).

Eggplant is practically all water, yet omits a funny Ghostbusters-like-slime soon after cooking (boy am I showing my age here, aren't I! ) Same thing with okra.
Is that slimy substance still considered a produce potty break? Hmm...

Mushrooms - There is good reason why some people call them mushies - oh wait, maybe that's just me : ). They omit a grey waterfall when cooked, and simply must be drained.

Kiwi Fruit - There is always a friendly puddle left behind from their little bladders. But they probably pee the cutest in my opinion, since they look like giant furry bear toes from the outside.

Maybe we need a 'sweaty produce' list. That would include sliced figs, mangoes and papaya's. They don't seem to do much but glisten and sweat, but would still need a little pat dry on their foreheads (if you will), from the condensation.

I'm not sure where to put onions in my zany theory, since they do sweat (and smell like sweat), but they make us sob more so than the onions, as we fend off our own tears!

Sometimes my husband will tell me after he's finished a fattening meal that he feels "like a solid".
This makes me think of other food items that are fattening, and, well...solid, to back up my claims.

Butter, lard, brie, frosting, full fat cream cheese, veleveeta, gravy, and anything deep fried, etc.
Forgive me for the the food porn. I am sure you get my point!

I definitely would avoid lumping certain items into the 'solid' category though, like dark chocolate and nut butters, since those delicacies have health benefits (Thank GOD!).

In conclusion, my theory is that fresh healthy food certainly MUST be alive. since it has a bladder, and a lot of times, and eagerness to prove it - on my meals.

I should hit up one of those fancy schmancy culinary stores sometimes and pick up multiple sizes and shapes of colanders, since I have vowed to keep the contents of my belly as clean as possible, which means I wont be ditching the wet stuff any time soon.

'Nuff said...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    *cracked me up!*

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AAAACK 10/21/2011 1:43AM

    Hey have you ever seen those little piddle absorbers in berry containers!? They're just mini versions of puppy training pads. You are just too funny!

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LSBETH 10/12/2011 5:35PM

    emoticonI prefer poached eggs so mine really get a lot of piddle LOL emoticon I like the juiciness of the rest of the stuff but after reading your blog they won't be looked at in quite the same way as before LOL -
hope you're doing well on maintenance!!! You're so awesome!

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MEDDYPEDDY 10/11/2011 1:17AM

    You made me giggle here, thanks!

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REDSHOES2011 10/9/2011 11:09PM

    emoticon Zany thinker but true, I hate the yolk not cooked.....

Comment edited on: 10/9/2011 11:11:29 PM

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MALKS_ARIA 10/9/2011 11:05PM

    Yeah but......

LOL They are so tasty and good for you!!!!

Try using a Cast Iron Skillet on top of your tofu to "drain" it.... LOL

and Just eat your eggs quickly!!! and why aren't you juicing all those good fruits and veggies?!?! Then you wouldn't be worrying about the juice on your shirt. (This coming from the gal who feeds her shirt each meal... cuz it has got to eat too! LOL ) :) Have a great week!!!

emoticon emoticon

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MOMKAT4310 10/9/2011 8:07PM

    So funny!!!

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MOXIEGAL67 10/9/2011 2:39PM

    eggs sitting in their own pee....yummmm. emoticon

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RYDERB 10/7/2011 11:44PM

    If only you hadn't compared all those yummy things to Olive's piddle.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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    I have a word for you. Zany. I think that suits you.

Um, I don't care about food pee. But I'll eat just about anything.

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KAYELENE 10/7/2011 9:05PM

    emoticon so true! emoticon seem to be a bad one for me.

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PAMNANGEL 10/7/2011 8:53PM


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    Strange, yet true!

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When Does The Skin Catch Up To The Weight Loss?

Saturday, October 01, 2011

My underarms still wave back at me. Not much has changed in that vicinity of my body since posting that blog months ago.
And now my legs seem to 'keep walking' once I stop.
Let's just say that I have great hesitation to jump up and down right now..... Hrrruuummph!

When does the skin catch up to the pound-age lost?
Is this because I am 37? Is that the magical age when gravity gives out? When does 'droopy' kick in?
Did I miss something?

I refuse to think of this as permanent (please NOOOO!)
But I need a time line here; a goal to keep me from using my underarm skin to wipe the tears from my eyes - and perhaps some bungee cords to keep everything strapped down and sane (my brain mostly).

I work out 6 days a week, even though I am quite limited at what I can do these days. I am not back to running yet, or up for the long walks. But even if I was able to run, I'm not sure that I could endure the deflated droopy wiggly slapping sound of my largest organ (my skin) doing some sort of Bionic Woman time delay move to catch up with it's contents (muscle and bones).
Please go away and don't come back. Your time lag moves are not graceful.

I am spending hard earned $ on firming creams that don't seem to touch this dilemma. Self tanning creams work for about a day, but I tend to look silly (and smell like sourdough bread). Me no like-y...

I could certainly fix this problem by gaining all the weight back, but I won't entertain that thought!

So now what?

Do I hide rolled up dollar bills into the folds of my skin, and then wave my arms in the air on the street corner; turning myself into a real live money tree?

Will I be an even slower swimmer due to drag in the water from my excess skin acting as rudders?

Perhaps I could use my body as a literal canvas, and write secret messages on my knees, so that when I sit down, the people in front of me will get a nice surprise? Hmm, that reminds me of the back page of those old Mad Magazines from the past!

I vow to keep my head high, and not dwell on the flap-age (for the rest of today anyway).
Keeping my head high also prevents me from being able to see the droopy bits. : )

'Nuff said'


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRZYKAT3 10/11/2011 9:25AM

    Love your story.

Skin elasticity does change with age. You should talk to your doctor about what to do with excess skin and how long it will take to recover. My niece had surgery and her skin, 4 years later is still recovering, she lost over 100 pounds. NOt sure what you have lost but keep pluggin away , at 37 skin is still vibrant!

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MEDDYPEDDY 10/11/2011 1:23AM

    As I am 59 it is too late for me - if I ever lose that weight I sooo need to lose, I will behave a very defined sharpei-look. The major downside of that will be the danger of eczema in the wrinkles andfolds...otherwise I will go for the "very-wise-woman"-look.. as you are much younger I think there is a lot of hope that the skin will eventually catch up. I would recommend dry-brushing (don´t know if that is the correct word) and exercising) to help the process. Circulation masage would surely be appreciated from all thet skin too...

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GENELDABELDA 10/6/2011 7:04AM

    Bren, While heredity may have something to do with it, so does time. My husband lost a 100 pounds over a year and has now kept it off for 6 months. Some places the skin has recovered, and some are still a little saggy. BUT it all looks better now than it did 6 months ago. Exercising once you lolse will help with the process because although muscle is smaller is still looks much better under skin than does fat. Keep at it and try to focus on something more positive as there is always something to not like.

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LUVBUNNYKK 10/4/2011 9:30AM

    Too funny! From what I have seen and heard from other people, it depends on heredity to an extent. Some people get stretch marks really bad when they are pregnant(like me), some don't get any...Same thing with excess skin. Some of us are just more prone to sagginess. I for one and hoping that by the time I lose all of my weight, I have also won the lottery so that I can have some of it removed! I've had several abdominal surgeries over the past 16 years, and I have a "flap"! Ever see the movie "Click" with Adam Sandler? There is a scene where he keeps playing with his flap and his wife tells him to stop. His reply: "It's my flap and I can do whatever I want with it!" Ha ha...cracks me up every time! Good luck to you!

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MALKS_ARIA 10/4/2011 3:10AM

    I don't know but when you figure it out let me know..... I am not quite there yet even though I have lost 35 lbs.... But I know I will get there sooner or later... cuz I have over 100 more pounds to lose...


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RYDERB 10/2/2011 11:05PM

    emoticon Keep doing your Tracy Anderson. I think those crazy exercises of hers have really helped me.I haven't had any more children ask me why my butt jiggles when I run, at least not lately. emoticon I still have A LOT more weight to lose, but I'm hoping my skin continues to shrink along with my butt. emoticon

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INCTRL 10/2/2011 9:07AM

    Very common problem. I heard it takes about a year after you lose the weight for the skin to shrink up. Mine never has! Unfortunately! Maybe its my age - 49!
I too love the way you write very creative -I am a numbers gal - very straight forward!

Laura emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/2/2011 9:07:52 AM

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AAAACK 10/2/2011 1:03AM

    As usual you crack me UP! I love your blogs, and while I'm gasping for air here while trying to catch up enough to come back to sparking regularly, it's so nice to come by your page and laugh my butt off. Ok, not off. Everything here jiggles too. And just you wait, when you get older, and lose weight, the evil wrinkle fairy begins making nightly visits. But I, too, refuse to put it back on!

Hope you're doing well, despite the flapping. Hey wait, is it musical at all? Maybe you could go on America's Got Talent? Or that new one...with Simon, yeah, he deserves to see someone with musical flappin' skin! I say you should go.

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OCEANBLUESA 10/1/2011 11:06PM

    funny :)

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CYNTHIAMINUS40 10/1/2011 9:56PM

    Great blog! Gosh, I'm 50 and I lost over 40 pounds and I've been wondering the same thing. I'm doing a lot of strength training right now and, while I still see droopy skin, I'm starting to see more muscle tone under there. I'm going to keep it up and see if it gets better over time. I'll keep you posted. emoticon

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ARLENE_MOVES 10/1/2011 5:37PM

    I'm 63 and don't even have hope that my skin jiggles will go away. Just found a turkey neck the other day (didn't see it till I took a pic). Not pretty!! Thinking that your young and with strength training, it should tighten up. I so enjoyed your blog -- it was refreshingly funny!!

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CANNIE50 10/1/2011 2:46PM

    I don't have any great answers for you (though I definitely have my share of skin). I do think, however, that any weight loss NOT accompanied by exercise, especially strength training of some sort, tends to make this problem worse. My theory is that I will displace, or replace, the space that was taken up by excess fat, with increased muscle. I will let you know how it goes..... emoticon PS just promise me you aren't comparing your 37 year old body to your 27 year old body, because that is just not fair to your hard-working body - okay, PROMISE?

Comment edited on: 10/1/2011 2:48:20 PM

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NIAGCHRIS246 10/1/2011 2:09PM

  You are still young, hopefully your skin will bounce back. Building muscle may help. The fat kept skin and muscle apart, it will take time to re-attach.

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LGAR519 10/1/2011 1:17PM

    Absolutely hilarious!!! Honey, I call them my jiggleys! I have lost weight before and never lost them. Best of luck to you.

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DAWNDMOORE40 10/1/2011 11:31AM

    It takes time for the skin to tighten once you start losing the weight! I have exercised and dieted for years and the weight would come off, but nothing was happening to the fact on the surface. This time everything seems to be working in balance. I want to say it again, It Takes Time! You will start to see definition, but even though that happens, I still have loose skin around my middle abs. You just have to keep doing your cardio, but make sure in between that you are doing strength training. That means get you some weights and when the amount of weight your using allows you to do more then 10 reps with good form without feeling tired, then it's time to increase that weight. Also, watch your sodium intake! That is a big one! I don't know why that makes a difference, but I never watched mine before all those years when I was losing weight. This time I did and the fat started to come off too! Maybe just a coinsedince, but it happened! It never hurts to try different things! I wish you the best! May God bless you and keep you motivated for another day!

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LSBETH 10/1/2011 10:48AM

    You're so funny. It is genetic and it does take time but you can also support the integrity of your skin by using natural products that 'feed' your skin and taking supplements. Check out the woman in the link of my last blog - she's 74 and was overweight before she got fit in her 50's.

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HAWKTHREE 10/1/2011 10:22AM

    Thanks for posting. It's made me curious enough to do a bit of research. I wonder if it's like stretch marks -- some women get them even with tiny babies -- other women don't get them even with 10 pounders.

I'm going to do a bit of searching at the National LIbrary of Medicine.

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Merrit Badges

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Some of us Sparkers seem to have uber awesome qualities that we should properly recognize and reward.
We all need motivation to not only get to our goal weight and lifestyle, but also to maintain it amidst our zany daily lives, right?

I vote for Spark Badges! Something that can be shown off or traded like baseball cards. OK, so I’ve never actually even owned baseball cards, but I am drawing a blank here on other items to trade aside from earrings…

All you need to start off with is a proper ‘Miss America’ style sash on your torso, and you’ve got the canvas for the colorful collection of badges to earn.

Strength Training Badge: Only for the hardcore (literally!). You work so hard, pressing and pulling, and it shows! This one is made of steel, since you are too! Now drop and give me 20!

Team Leader Badge (complete with megaphone and pom poms): Have you started up a team? Are you inclined to shepherd the flock; to nurture and encourage all who cross your path? This one’s for you.

The Fisherman (err, woman? Whatever!): You never let another friend fall, and you constantly cast your line into the water to fish for anyone struggling. I was ‘hooked’ right after joining Spark, since I was hanging out with the bottom dwellers and silty muck. Once I was reeled in, my Sparky Fisherman didn’t club me (ha!), but motivated me to succeed! Rather than allocating a sardine smelling badge for this, I vote for a goldfish cracker.

Weight Goal Badge: Congratulations!!! This badge is as light as a Forrest Gump-like feather, so as not to upset the scale by even a hair. Wear it with pride and tell everyone how Spark helped you reach your goal!

Healthy Food Badge: For some of us, the crossover from overly processed fast food to fresh produce and better choices was not an easy one. You’ve been experimenting with produce that was void in your life for too long and are enjoying the journey. This badge is made out of dried mango to further the point that good food IS yummy too! Just please don’t eat the badge…

Super Parent Badge: This badge is actually a locket. There is a photo of your kiddo(s) on the inside, and an engraving of you on the outside, with multiple arms, juggling it all! Oh, and maybe the super parents should also get a bonus cape. I mean really, you all NEED the cape too!

The Zzz’s Badge: Have you gotten enough sleep to ensure that the day starts off right? Well if so, then pin this fluffy 850 thread count mini pillow badge to your sash. We sacrifice sleep too often when the to-do list is overflowing. It takes skill and the courage to say “no” to protect that time.

Do we really need a Knot Badge? Like the merit badge of the Boy Scouts? I am not sure. I mean, unless you are tying a knot around something and then dragging it around for weight resistance… oh wait! Cannie50 – I remember that you actually DID do that once as a reminder of the weight you lost (and continue to lose). OK then, decision made. We can use a piece of rope for this Knot Badge – for dragging weight around…or small suitcases, and/or small creepy critters….no alligators!

Food Allergy Badge: This badge is made of anti-microbial, sugar-free, gluten-free, lactose-free, nut-free, pollen-free WATER. You see, this is a ‘wet badge’. You pretty much just get dunked. We can’t have your badge contaminating anything (like my DH did once when he accidentally double dipped his knife back into the peanut butter after using it on his gluten-filled bread. D’Oh!) Preparing food for the ones you love (or even yourself) can be a constant challenge. Lots of details to remember; from purchasing a simple can of soup (sneaky and confusing labels!), through serving (no cross contamination!). A well deserved badge.

Chronic Pain ---- Badge: This badge cannot actually be worn I am sorry to say. It is a shoulder to lean on (or cry on) for those of you who battle pain daily (like myself). Since Western / Eastern / Traditional (and non) treatments have not alleviated your ailment(s), some days you just need that shoulder...

Golden Grilled Cheese Badge: OK, so I threw this one in for me. So what!? For those gifted with the talent to wield their griddle pan into creating that perfect yin yang balance of a crispy outside and gooey cheddar center. This badge has an imprint of the spatula you used to create that gooey-ness. And the spatula is melted on one corner like your own spatula likely is at home! : ))

I know there are many more Spark Badges to be added. Any ideas?

‘Nuff Said…


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEDDYPEDDY 10/11/2011 1:27AM

    "Entertaining sparkers all over the world" would be a good one - you would not have room for otherson your sash....

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CLOVER2 9/28/2011 4:44PM

    This is an incredible(I've been using that word like crazy, but it is so true) idea! I'd like to see "Falling on your tushie but then you picked yourself up, dusted yourself off and went back to work!" (Is that too long??) I believe that those brave people who never give up no matter what are worthy, and YOU are at the top of that list!
emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/28/2011 4:44:55 PM

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1HAPPYWOMAN 9/27/2011 12:13AM

    How about an honesty badge? Because people are so brave and openhearted in sharing their stories and revealing their tender, squishy bits....

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MALKS_ARIA 9/26/2011 10:08PM

    As my son is on the floor working on his ART badge pin Award (Cub Scout Webelos) right now.... I smiled and said... "I qualify for that one" ... "and that one" and "that one...." I wouldn't mind displaying them with my other Spark Trophies.... :) Sounds good!!!

and don't forget the "Lose it Slowly" Turtle Badge... For those of us who are taking our time, and losing a very small amount each month, sometimes the scales don't even seem to be moving....

and the "I did it" badge.. for conquering that thing you negatively thought you would never do (again).

Keep up the good job and the smile on my face!!!

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CANNIE50 9/26/2011 5:50PM

    Hi clever girl. I'm wearing my satiny sash, just waiting for the badge ceremony. I think we should have a "new, smaller undies" badge - wouldn't that be fun, to wear that in public? How about a "brave, intrepid Sparkler" badge? I will pin that one on you, personally. oxoxo

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OWENSAUNT1 9/26/2011 3:36PM

    Very nice plan! And, yes, we all do need to toot our own horns sometimes. When we struggle with something like diet and exercise, it is so easy to fall into negative self-talk when we miss goals, etc. It is always nice to celebrate every small success! Great ideas!

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AAAACK 9/26/2011 11:46AM

    I love this! I can picture the little pillow badge and I want it! I'm going to start trying to earn one.

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WINACHST 9/26/2011 10:12AM

    I think we all show off our "badges" in the things we post here on SP. Thanks for blogging! You are so awesome!


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TO_BE_FIT 9/26/2011 8:30AM

    Love your creativity.


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RYDERB 9/25/2011 7:27PM

    I LOVE it! How do you come up with this stuff. Oh I know, because you're amazing emoticon
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LGAR519 9/25/2011 2:21PM

    What an imagination you have. I don't have a creative bone in my body. I'll leave the Badges to you! emoticon

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SUNFLOWER4ME 9/25/2011 1:05PM


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PURESTILLWATER 9/25/2011 12:00PM

    We need a badge for sense of humor, perhaps a rubber duck or something. I would give that one to you for sure.

And sweetheart badge, we need one for people like you who just are real sweetie pies. This is a horrible SP badge image but maybe a cream pie LOL

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HIPPIECHIC68 9/25/2011 11:35AM

    This is awesome, Bren!

Sending hugs your way... emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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