Thursday, June 27, 2013
So, I dropped off the face of the Earth for a while there. Sorry about that. Totally my bad. I should have checked in and let you know what the dealio was.
State walked in to the building on June 10. From that point on, things were just GO GO GO! for 4 solid days. Like, seriously. In those 4 days, I worked 53 hours. And then worked my usual 8 the day after they left, making a grand total of 61 hours in 5 days. Worth it, though. My department came out with only 2 deficiencies. I'd like to have 0 next year. In some ways, I feel like I'm still recovering from that grueling week. I know I am recovering in work that got set aside or put off. I'm practically drowning in paperwork that needs to be caught up on!
I haven't done much good for myself lately, either. No real exercise to speak of. And the weather has already reached 120*F outside, so... Yeah. That's the sort of heat that saps your energy even when you're indoors with the A/C running full blast. I'm wondering if we'll see another 100*F at midnight type of summer. Anyway, I want to start something fun like boxing training, but I've decided to wait until mid-ish-July to do so. 1) I'll have another paycheck in the bank. 2) I'll have a set of wheels to go somewhere to train (my granny is going on vacation for 2 months and I get to use her car in the meantime!) 3) I'll have figured out where to go to train by then (I hope). If I was a morning person, which I'm not and never, ever, EVER in my life have EVER been, I would get up early and get in a workout before work. And I'm not going to make myself feel guilty for not doing so. Of course, this leaves the time for me to workout at "after work". Unfortunately, I'm usually pretty exhausted at the end of my work day. I've got a 30 minute commute in addition to my 8.5 hour day. I know if I start small and build up that eventually I'll have more energy than I know what to do with, but it's taking that small step to start it initially. And I'm just not 'there' yet.
Nutritionally, my intake has been varied, at best. Terrible- and I mean terrible- at worst. Lots of junk, convenience foods, and really sh!tty gas station coffee... Which, sadly, is less sh!tty than the coffee brewed in my own work kitchen. I don't drink enough coffee to warrant brewing a pot at home. And Starbucks is always too damn packed in the morning. I got places to GO! Anyway, I digress. Most days of the week I am eating pretty decent dinners, and the leftovers for lunch the next day. My breakfasts are the meals that get sketchy... My lady cooks in the kitchen are all Mexican and they make some really REALLY AWESOME authentic, from scratch, homemade Mexican food breakfasts. Nopales and eggs, chorizo and potatoes, chilequiles, handmade tortillas, and my ultimate favorite- special quesadillas. It's a dish that's strictly regional. I can't even find special quesadillas in San Diego, 120 miles away. Then I try to tell people about them and they think I'm nuts. Let's just say they're stuffed to the gills with cheese and deep fried. For breakfast. Every Friday. YIKES. Then, the rest of the weekend hits...
Could you resist??
Saturdays are my scheduled splurge day.
Just before state walked in (literally, the Saturday before the Monday) was my "niece's" 1st birthday, so I got to go and enjoy that. Us 30-year-olds kicked all the kids outta the bouncy castle and had 5 minutes of fun with that. Had lots of yummy food- sandwiches, potato salad, beer (just like California to have beer at a 1-year-old's birthday party! ), fresh fruit, Caesar salad... Awesome times! Even more awesome is it was NOT in my hometown, so the weather was simply beautiful.
Bouncy castles. Not just for kids.
Last Saturday I got to do something fun and just for me... I hung out with a friend! WOO! We had frozen yogurt. Then, on a whim, decided to go see a movie, where I had popcorn (with that oily fake buttery crap all over it!), nachos with not nearly enough jalapenos, and a huge Mr. Pibb. Granted, that was all I ate that day, but still. You see where this 2 paragraph rant is going. Even my "healthy" meals during the week don't have enough vegetable or fruit elements to them. Whole grains are hit or miss. Lean meats are no problem. Dairy is lacking, too, in many instances. Basically, how the hell am I still alive?! Hahaha, no really, though. Even if- IF- my macronutrients were in ranges, and thanks to my lack of tracking and the fact the SparkPeople now CHARGES for their app LAMEEEEE!!! I don't know if they are or not, the things I'm putting in my body aren't nutritionally dense. I'm sure they're lacking vitamins, minerals, phytochemicals, antioxidants, fiber, etc. that my body needs to function optimally.
Today it was super evident. Just before lunch today, my blood sugar plummeted. Luckily, there are nurses as far as the eye can see where I work. So, I ate my lunch and still didn't feel okay. So, I was ordered to drink an orange juice, 4 ounces, with- get this- a packet of sugar added to it. I did as I was told, and while I felt immensely better afterward, can I just say... EW. Over-sweet orange juice is just awful. That alone makes me want to watch myself more closely. And, so, I'm going to be doing just that.
Anyway, that's the long and short of it for me. I've got my kitty's Facebook page up and going if you want to follow along on her angry exploits:
And here is my second to final project for my PhotoShop class (I still can't get my final project to save in a smaller format without crashing my computer... sorry) I can't believe I didn't post this one. It turned out great.
"Bloody Face Boom Boom" is what I've decided my roller derby name will be. If I decide to ever do roller derby. Which I never will. Because I like my teeth just where/they way they are.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
So, for those of you who can recall, oh so long ago (at least that's how it seems to me) that I had set a few goals for the month of April. I started off strong that first week, struggled through the second week, and began what I can only describe as "limping along" for the first part of the third, then getting a job out of nowhere and that was the end of any goals I ever did have!
I know where I lost momentum. I just don't know why. Where did my motivation go? Where did that drive go? I seriously don't know. Am I happy being only halfway to my goal? (No.) Am I content with being a size 14/16 instead of a size 18/20? (No.) Do I like having a Large t-shirt instead of an XL/XXL? (No.) Do I like feeling sluggish and tired because of junky, processed, nutritional wasteland-type foods? (No.) So, what's the dealio, yo? Why do I seem to want to stay this way instead of improving? I don't have an answer for that.
Last week was the end of my classes for the semester. Just in the two weeks that my job and classes overlapped, I have to say: I don't know how people do it. I don't know how people work at a job 8/+ hours a day and then go to classes, too. And fulfill responsibilities at home. I had so little time for homework. I spent an entire day, from the moment I woke up, to the moment I went to bed (waaaaaaaaaay past my bedtime, too) working on my final project for PhotoShop. It turned out nice and everyone had nice things to say about it. I got a 95/100 on it. I'm not disappointed with that grade. I knew I wouldn't get 100pts on it because I didn't do a "compilation" background. I tried, but the vision in my head was not translating to the canvas. So, I took a background, did some modifications on it to better suit my needs, and went with that. I think it turned out better than anything I could have pieced together. Even if it is plagiarism. Or copyright infringement. Whatever. That's all this class has ever been. I would post a completed copy of my project for ya'll to see, but the canvas size was soooooo huge (it was meant to be poster-sized) that I couldn't save it as a .jpeg without crashing my computer. My final product's size (in .psd format) is 1.21gb. Huge. I did, however, get an A in the class overall. So, that's just fine with me.
My stats final... didn't go too well. Thanks to my job and working outrageously huge amounts of hours, I was left with very little time to study. By the time I'd get home from work and sit down to do some homework/studying, I'd be so exhausted I'd fall asleep with my calculator in my lap and my computer on. And he saved the hardest chapter for last: probabilities. I remember them from my last attempt at taking stats. They were hard. And a concept I couldn't easily grasp. And still couldn't by the time our test came around. Sadly, out of the 25 questions on the test, about 18 of them were probability questions from that chapter. The rest were from other chapters throughout the semester. Unfortunately, I don't know my grade from that test or that class yet. At my estimation, the best I could have done is a mid-C. At least I passed it, but the reality is, I needed to also do well in it. It was a class the admissions folks for my Master's Program are going to look at and factor in. :-(
So, let me tell you about this job. It's a DSS position (dietary services supervisor) at a skilled nursing facility. The kitchen there has been long neglected. There are issues up the yin-yang that need to be fixed. And that's where I come in. I oversee the kitchen and dietary doings. So, I've been working on the kitchen and getting it up to code as far as equipment, sanitation training for employees, emergency supplies, etc. Its a lot of work and very long days. I also screen new admits and update their charts regarding their nutrition status. That part involves a lot of paperwork. And a lot of time. It's one of those things that requires a lot of little details in addition to the big picture. I'm glad I can say I'm employed again. I'm glad I can say I am using some part of my schooling, finally... all those 5am days, 4+ hours on public transportation, countless cups of coffee, training... finally paid off. I still feel like I'm learning as I go, and that will possibly always be the case, but I'm glad to be where I am. Now I just need my own car to make life a bit easier.
I'm not sure what my immediate future is going to hold with all these changes and revelations. I still hope to join ballet in the fall. I'd like to get a gym membership to take boxing classes at a local gym. I hope I can still take classes and continue working toward my "higherest" education. Maybe once I've let myself settle into the position over summer, I can be better equipped to integrate class work with my work schedule.
Anyhow, I'm sorry to have dropped off the radar, but now you know why. I am keeping up with you all, slowly and silently. I read your blogs and updates. I just haven't always had the time to drop ya'll a line to let you know I'm still here.
And since it's Mother's Day...
Happy Mother's Day!
Hmmm... I need a new pic! This was like... 3 years ago.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
#1, maybe in light of some recent events in our United States and the world, a positive pick-me-up blog is what you or someone you may know needs:
#2, "April Take Back" week 2 was rough for me. I feel like every step was a struggle. I had to constantly push and force and this and that. My calories were all way over where they should have been (and as such, many other macronutrients as well). My vitamin intake was low, also. I may have to consider supplements. I couldn't get a handle on how much I was taking in, even if I thought I was eating really healthy. I also know I ate passed midnight at least 2 nights. My fitness minutes are in dispute. Spark counts a week as Sun-Sat, starting anew on Sunday. But, April began on Monday, so I'm counting my weeks as Mon-Sun. So, I either came in 27 minutes short or was at 181 fitness minutes. Depends on how you wanna look at it. Personally, I like the numbers of where I was successful!
However, my fitness has not been all that consistent. I skipped workouts two days in a row, worked out a day, then skipped a day again, worked out, skipped another day... I need to workout daily, and plan for 1 or 2 rest days (at most) in the week. My first two workouts of the week were just over 30 minutes long, and then the next one was 48 minutes, and the next 58 minutes. I'd like to keep them consistently higher (although 30 is my month's minimum, so maybe I need to just chillax). Despite the spotty record, I do find that my endurance has improved a bit. I am still literally dripping with sweat by the end, but I find I'm able to go longer, do more reps, etc. It's the little things...
I weighed myself and found I gained 2 full pounds. I'm not trusting that number, though, because it's TOM for me, so I'm sure I'm bloated and retaining water. Also, that could explain my sh!tty nutrition for the week. So, I know what needs improving for this week. Its going to be tough (I have yet another stats test on Thursday... didn't I just take one of those?!?!) and I need to be consistent and schedule myself accordingly.
#3, Boston. I just have no words. I'm heartbroken. I can only hope the jerk(s) who did this are brought to justice. I keep the people affected in my prayers and thoughts. Today, in honor of them, I'm wearing my Iron Girl t-shirt, since it's my only race shirt, and I wear it in solidarity with the running/fitness community [and the world community]. All my love to the big city that feels like a little city!
Friday, April 12, 2013
My wonderful SparkFriend, SMILINGTREE was issued a challenge to write down the things she LIKED about herself. You can read what prompted it here:
So, I accepted her challenge. And here's why:
It's so easy for us all to get caught up in the "rat race" of this journey. We get stuck on numbers: numbers on the scale, numbers on the measuring tape, number of calories, fat grams, protein and carbs, the number on the tag on your pants. These things are just so concrete, sometimes we forget the NSV (non-scale victories). But, even more important than that, we forget to love ourselves for who we are first!
Think about it. Will being a size 8 make you a better person than being a size 18? Not likely. It might make you healthier, sure (but, not always!). But, learning to love ourselves while we are a size 18 is important because being a size 8 might not be that panacea to all our problems. And since many people are on this journey for that visible, physical reduction in mass, start loving the parts of you that look good at any size.
You are an important, beautiful, wonderful, strong, hard-working soul, NO MATTER WHAT SIZE YOU ARE. You need to remember that. You absolutely do matter. To yourself, to your family, to your friends, to this world. You. Matter.
So, I go forth and extend the challenge to you... write a quick blog about what it is you find you like/love about yourself (let's start with the physical) and share it! (And feel free to link back to the original blog of SMILINGTREE or mine!) And also go click that "I Liked This Blog" button on her blog (or this one).
*My teeth. I didn't always love them, but I did get braces to straighten out a few things (mostly the crowded teeth that constantly and painfully rubbed against the inside of my mouth) and now I enjoy smiling and showing off these chompers. Sure, they could be whiter, but I think having them at all is a win and I love to see they're there!
*Along the same vein, I love my lips. They're full, with the bottom being slightly fuller than the top. I think my lips are pretty and sexy. And I never need to buy those lip-plumping products! WOO!
*My fingers/hands. I have small-ish hands (I didn't realize until recently), but I have long slender fingers (in proportion to my small hands!) and they are awesome. They fit into tiny places, they move gracefully across the keyboard, they help where help is needed. I like the look of my hands. They're still youthful and graceful.
*My shape. For a long time I hated being pear shaped since it was so hard to find dresses that fit both the top and bottom of me. But, now I really like having curves. As I lose weight I sure hope they don't go away. I like having hips, a waist, boobs... I just don't need to have as much of them! ;-) So, yes, I like being curvy and that means I like my shape.
*And finally, I like my feet. They've given me some trouble over the years, but really, I like how they look. They're also a bit small, like my hands, but I take good care of them. The arches are a little high, so they hurt frequently, but they look great in ballet slippers! HAHA! My second toe is slightly longer than my big toe, but that doesn't bother me. My nails are clean and trimmed nicely. They look great with some polish. I love the tattoos I have on my feet. I like wearing toe rings. I think I have great "summer feet" year 'round!
Monday, April 08, 2013
My first week I'd say has been fairly successful. Then again, it's been spring break, so I've had less-than-usual distractions. The next week is going to be the REAL test. And then after that I have yet another stats test, so that's going to REALLY be a real test! Balancing studying with my healthy lifestyle has always been a bit of a struggle.
So, I want to do 150 fitness minutes per week. This week I did 170. YAY! I took today off as I'm *really* sore from yesterday's workout. I did a YouTube video from the Blogilates vlog, Pop Pilates for Beginners- Total Body Workout. Boy is it hard for a beginner's workout. But, I felt great. I mean, the soreness only really rears it's head when I sneeze or cough (which I still do a lot). I also did 5 out of 7 days of my Tuff Butt Challenge (lunges/squats/lunge holds). Tomorrow is a rest day, but I'm taking it today thanks to my sore glutes, so I'll still get my 6 out of 7 days, just not in the same week.
Not eating after midnight... I think I've held to this pretty well. I think there was one day this week that I was STARVING!!! in the middle of the night and had to eat something just so I could go back to sleep... growling stomachs are quite distracting. But, otherwise, I've done fairly well. I'm still on the hunt for a clock, though. I think that would help me greatly.
Drinking more water? Uh... needs improvement still. I've been drinking beverages, just not always water. Today I was drinking plain tea (with a little bit of stevia to cut the bitter). I was drinking my own homemade lime Arnold Palmers the other day. That was sweetened, though, and contributed quite a few calories to my day. Still working on this.
Freggies with every meal. This week I think I've been successful. My mom made a big fruit salad, so that's accompanied lunches for a few days this week. And I always schedule some kind of veg with dinner. So, pretty good on this one!
I took care of a few neglected things this week while I had the money and the time. Got a haircut. It was very, very badly needed. Pixie cuts like mine need maintenance every 4-6 weeks so they don't look like... well, mangy Sasquatch CRAP when they start to grow out. I waited 3 months. Now, I can say I look the way I'm supposed to. The day after my haircut, I took care of my driver's license. It expired on January 6th (ya know, my birthday) and I just never got it renewed. I'm sure my notice was sent to who knows where old address in San Diego. And since I don't drive down here, I wasn't in a real hurry to get a new one. But, now I need to buy vodka for my vanilla extract and I need a valid photo ID to do that. So, new photo taken for the license. New license being processed and sent. Swell.
Unfortunately, not in time for me to do anything fun in San Diego this spring break. Can I just say how disappointed I am? I wish I had a job so I can buy a car. Then, I can go to San Diego without having to ask someone to go or to borrow their car or whatever. I can just go as long as I can afford the gas. Obviously I'm missing San Diego a whole helluva lot right now. I miss my home.
I've had homework over spring break because my jerk face teachers don't know what the word "break" means. Maybe they should go back to a g.d. English class! No, I'm not bitter... Pffffft, yes I am! Downright p*ssed!!! Anyway, my group members for my stats project flaked/forgot about our project and wanted to wait until the last possible minute to complete it (no freakin' thanks, folks) so I took matters into my own hands and picked up the slack on Friday. Collected data and sent it to them to analyze. I'll be working on it more tomorrow. Actually, I'd like to finish it tomorrow.
Today I worked on PhotoShop homework. I'm actually pretty proud of it. I don't believe in PhotoShopping someone so that they present an unrealistic ideal of women (or men) and that was actually what this latest project was about. Well, I did the opposite. I did smooth out a few lumps here and there on my photo model, but mostly, I added a little bit of muscle definition and filled out some curves to make her appear bigger. A bit healthier and fuller. Do I like that I did even that? No, not really. I prefer un-retouched photos of REAL people just as they are. But, then what would I have to do for this assignment? But, I made my agenda clear and my feelings known anyway. :-D
It's supposed to look like a magazine cover, so I hope I succeeded.
Image Credit: http://www.superfitmomma.com/2012/08/21/in
Well, that's it for me. One good first week done. Three more to go! Wish me luck, check in with me (leaving a comment on my page is perfectly fine- I will answer you back!), keep me accountable, call me on my b.s. please!!! and don't let me make excuses. Also, just let me know how YOU'RE doing, too!
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