Sunday, March 09, 2014
Maintenance for me has been such a set of trial and errors. I have been maintaining my "goal range", which has also been quite the learning experience. Anyways for the past year I have been maintaining at the top of my range, which even though is in range, it not my goal weight. So for the past year I have been actively, all be it not very seriously, trying to drop about 10 pounds, yeah that's right 10 pounds! My goal range has a 20 pound spread. Like I said it's been a learning experience but for me this works. Anyways I have been battling between losing weight and eating treats, most of the time treats win but I have still managed to keep at least a 3500 calorie deficit every single week and yet haven't lost any weight.
So this past week I bought a heart rate monitor, just trying to get a clearer idea of calories burned. I mean I am tracking everything, have a deficit and still am not losing weight, there has to be a reason. Well turns out it's because I am WAY off on how many calories I am really burning. I have been basing my calories burned from the machines at the gym, BIG MISTAKE!! Turns out I am burning about 40% of what the machines say, even my distance tracker is about 50%. So here I am thinking I am doing so well, turns out I have barely been burning what I eat. Man that was a punch to the gut. I thought I was doing so good.
My husband thought I was crazy for getting so upset, I mean it has seriously taken me 3 days to get over the feeling of being violated. I tried to put it in terms he could understand, I went with money. Lets say that you are putting in a fulls day work thinking you are making $100 a day, then you get paid and it's only $40 a day. I mean you'd be pissed too.
I understand that a heart rate monitor is not the end all be all, I have noticed that it loses the signal occasionally, but I would far rather under estimate than over estimate. Besides I have signed up for a half marathon and it would be far easier to run if I weighed less. So I will got with what my heart rate monitor tells me, although I would much prefer to believe I am burning a lot more!! Damn technology!!!
Either way I am still killing it at the gym!!
Sunday, February 09, 2014
So I made it to that all magical 2 year mark.
Supposedly when you make the 2 year mark of maintenance your chances of regaining the weight drop down to 50%, not great odds but much better than the 95% within the first year.
But really what do those odds mean? Do those odds keep me from eating whatever I want? Do those odds drag my butt out of bed and to the gym? No! Just because my odds are increased certainly doesn't mean that the I can relax on the hard work.
During my first year of maintenance, when the odds of me regaining all of my weight were a staggering 95% I was scared to death. I not only keep up my extreme weight loss routine, it actually became more restrictive. I was so scared of those odds that I literally was killing myself to not gain it back. That first year of maintenance was rough.
During my second year of maintenance I started to become more relaxed, maybe even a little too relaxed. I gained some weight back and in turn gained back some of my sanity.
What I have realized about this process is that it is all about learning. While weight loss have a very structured plan, maintenance doesn't. There are no rule books telling you how maintenance works. If there were, no one would be overweight. So while the first year for me was about learning to not gain the weight back, the second year was about learning to live again.
I know that I like food. I know that there are going to be occasions where I want to eat crappy. There are going to be occasions where I will want to eat healthy. Hopefully there will be a lot more of the latter. I also know that exercise is a part of my daily life. For me exercise is what keeps me going, and more importantly keeps me succeeding. While you can't out exercise a bad diet you can counter act a bad choice, or two.
As I have went a long in this process I have learned that this new lifestyle is becoming less of a chore and more of a routine. Eating healthier is just what I do, I have relaxed enough to allow myself treats but for the most part I just eat what I eat. Exercise is less of a task and more just a part of my daily life. There are still days where I have to remind myself why I work so hard, but there are also days when I have to tell myself that I have to shower too.
Reaching my goal weight.
1 Year Maintenance Anniversary
2 Year Maintenance Anniversary
This journey from start to finish has been challenging, exciting, trying and a roller coaster. There have been ups and downs. I have had to learn as I went, man have there been a lot of learning curves, but in the long run I have finally learned that self acceptance, dedication and hard work are the "secrets to success"! and even though the statistics don't mean all that much, it's still nice to know that I am now on an even playing field.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
I totally caved, though probably not what your expecting. Maintenance is going great! What I've given in to is running races. For so long I've been totally against paying to run. I run for myself. I don't run to prove anything to anyone else besides me. But the racing bug has bit. It bit first when I ran a relay race. It was fun and the feeling of accomplishment was amazing. Then it bit again when I ran, and MURDERED a 10k. Crossing the finish line just feels great. Don't get me wrong, everyday I run I feel like Im metaphorically crossing some kind of finish line but to truly cross a finish line literally is a different feeling all together. It's nice to have people cheering for you when you finish, although I'd be lying if I said I didn't occasionally, ok all the time, give myself a little cheer after every run. So I registered to run my first half marathon in May!! I'm beyond excited. A little nervous, the furthest I've run to date is 10.3 miles without stopping, but I feel like another 3 won't be too bad. I'm hoping to not just finish it but give a good effort to get around a 9 min/mile pace.
So there it is. I bow down to the racing gods and accept this lifestyle as my own.
Wednesday, January 08, 2014
Occasionally I get down on myself because I weigh more than I did at my lowest weight. I find myself wanting to lie about how much I weigh. But I got to thinking, what not embrace that number. Wear the number with pride, be proud of the person you are, the person you were and the person you are going to be. There is no reason to be embarrassed or down about any number. Even if it's not the lowest weight, even if it's the highest weight, it is yours. Be happy with the person you are. If you want better then make it happen, but instead of hating yourself in the mean time, learn to love yourself at every size. Just because the weight comes off doesn't mean all the issues are going to be fixed. Learn to love yourself and everything starts to fall into place.
Just a little food for thought, did someone say FOOD!
Highest Weight vs. Lowest Weight Vs. Now. Learning to love them all!
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