Monday, July 15, 2013
Man oh man, the heat continues. We had a few days of a reprieve and now we're back to it. In between there, I ran my - no lie - 44th 5K.
It was NOT a pretty sight. It wasn't sunny and it was actually not too super-hot but man oh man it was humid. It was like moving through a wet rag. And of course speed suffers from such things. Ah, well. I don't run 'em to qualify for the Olympics or anything, yanno.
In the meantime, I am more actively looking for work. Today I had my third phone screen and - eek - I am afraid that, this time, I blew it. I was late, and that is never a good sign. It is hard to recover from that, and it was my own stupid fault. At least I admitted it, but I feel dopey. It just feels like it was going along all right and then I tripped over my own feet.
So, amidst the ugly sweaty humidity, I also feel like I screwed up royally. Feh.
Good news? I suppose there is some. I have been drowning my sorrows in water and not ice cream.
But this was, possibly, another form of self-sabotage. And that has got to stop.
Monday, July 08, 2013
I think I posted this song fairly recently, but no matter. Consider it a reprise.
Man oh man it is HOT!
We had, what was it? Four? Five? Whatever - it has been a lotta over 90 days. Today, we are going up to the low 80s. Hey, it'll be awesome!
Eh, who am I kidding?
But at least it's almost 9:30 AM and currently the a/c is off. Let's see how long that lasts.
And one thing I have in my head is the memory of similar heat waves past, back into before 2008, which is when I started sparking and started losing.
And I was HOT! And I was hot a lot more often and for a lot longer than I am these days. Those were days that I would lurch from the bedroom a/c to the computer room a/c to the TV room a/c and I would sleep a lot during the day because I just felt so godawful and I had zero energy.
You may be asking yourself how I have been handling this current heatwave.
Or maybe you aren't, but I will gladly ask that question for you. ;)
I'm doing okay. I have escaped to napping a little bit; sometimes, it really has been that brutal. But it took a lot more for me to cry uncle and really get to that point. I also went out and walked, either super-early or super-late, all days but one. And I strength-trained every single morning, including this one.
Did I lose weight? Nope, I gained, albeit not that much. But I think more importantly is that I was able to get through this like a lot less of a slug. The weather has been horrific but it also has not turned into a built-in excuse to just throw in the towel.
So, victory may not be mine, but defeat isn't, either.
And I will take that, so long as it's wrapped in a ziploc bag with a ton of ice, thanks.
Monday, July 01, 2013
Today's song kinda reflects how I feel right now. It's hot and sticky here and that makes everything feel weird, moving too fast and it is a distinctly unpleasant lack of control.
Maybe I'm just dehydrated. I am gulping down water (no, I'm not a diabetic or a prediabetic; it's just hot here) but hey, whatever, anything's possible right now. Maybe I'll put today's Greek yogurt into the freezer.
Tip - lime yogurt is as icky and weird as it sounds, even if it's Greek and even if it's frozen. Don't buy three, like I did. Although if I added gin ....?
'Course I'm not going to do that.
Anyway, life here in jespah land is overly hot and stressful. I am looking more intently for work. Got my last pay check today. Yes, I have been laid off. Just another bit o' fun. I'll be fine, we will be fine, etc.
I'm just kinda tired of doing that sort of thing.
Then again, the heat is making even short trips to put a dish in the sink seem like they should be Everest-worthy.
I has a tired. I has a stress.
I wonder how many calories are in barbecued iguana.
Enjoy Wall of Voodoo.
Monday, June 24, 2013
I live so much of my life online that it's odd for things to be confined too much to the offline world. I am not the kind of person who tweets about every mouthful, every workout, every visit, every heartache, every triumph, ever breaking of wind. But I do find comfort in others online, and intelligence and simpatico that I often do not find locally.
And then when that avenue is shut off, or turns vague, it's difficult. But what can ya do?
So - imagine - a life without Spark - where your struggles are quiet or are closeted. And you wonder if anyone thinks or feels the way you do, and whether anyone understands.
Imagine and then remember that it is here. Things are far better than they were even ten years ago. You don't have to go running off to scheduled Weight Watcher's meetings - unless you want to. You don't need to loudly declare your dieting in order to get someone to take back your toast at the diner and bring it back dry this time because that's how you ordered it. You don't need to be the fat girl at the gym if you don't want to, and can work out at home, or slap on ear buds and go out walking with a thousand other people and nobody bats an eye.
Things are good now, they're better, and I bet they'll only become better as we go.
Can't wait for what the future holds.
Monday, June 17, 2013
It is another massive allergy day, and it might end up being a big-time allergy week.
But I will go out anyway, and walk, and clear my head.
There will be pollen.
Lots and lots of pollen.
I think cardio should count more if you're sneezing. Who's with me?
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