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Now She's Stupid in the Street

Monday, January 31, 2011

So I know the title of this blog is weird (it got you to click on it, though, right? See, my plan is working ....). But the song works because we had -- oof -- a bit of fun in the house a few days ago.

I will set the stage for you.

My husband and I live in the Brighton section of Boston, which is the West end. The house, depending upon who you talk to or where you look it up, was built in either 1896 or 1921. Either way, it's old and creaky. It's a Victorian one-family and, as they say in the real estate biz, it's a fixer-upper.

We have lived here since 1995 and have done some fixing and, er, upping, but time and money tend to prevent same, and often those two things do not arrive together. The first few years we were there, we would leave an upstairs window open. I do not honestly know why as, like everywhere else on the planet, there are bugs in Brighton. We are not talking about a big opening here, but still maybe an inch up. But it was the third floor. When there are only two of you, and you live in a six-bedroom place, the third floor tends to be forgotten. It could fly off in the next hurricane and we'd probably notice about four years later, as one would turn to the other and say something like, "Do you feel a draft?"

Anyway, open window = critters come in. And Mr. J had to deal with him. The man kills the big bugs and does critter removal services with aplomb, often clad only in a towel. It doesn't make the critters depart any faster if Mr. J is only clad in a towel but, for whatever reason, it often works that way. Once that window was closed, the number of Close Encounters of the Critter Kind diminished significantly, and we had last seen this particular type of critter (which I will tell you of in a moment, gentle reader) in a good thirteen years or so.

Anyway, it was a work night. Thursday, I think. We were sitting in the Computer Room, doing computer-y things. And he says, "There's something flying around in here." And I'm thinking: moth.

I look out of the corner of my eye and it is bigger. And it's black. And it's flapping.

Yes, folks, it's a bat.

Now, the last times we had a bat in the house, I shivered, got under a desk or table or covers and screamed incoherently. I am proud to say that, in the past thirteen years, I have matured considerably. Yes, I still cowered, but this time I was able to actually say a word. Which was, of course: "BAT!"

Mr. J sprang into action and followed all normal protocols. These involve the following steps:
(a) Get bat out of current room and into hallway
(b) Close off current room
(c) Turn on lights in hallway
(d) Close off all other rooms
(e) Get the Bat Persuader 9000 (an old tennis racket)
(f) Proceed to persuade guest down the stairs
(g) Repeat steps a - d as needed downstairs
(h) Open front door or back door as is most convenient (in this case, it was the front door)
(i) Persuade guest out of front door
(j) Close front door
(k) Begin breathing again

Now, Mr. J was normally clad and not only in a towel. There simply wasn't enough time for him to get into his standard critter removal gear. We will, of course, allow him to slip and be out of uniform for this particular incursion. He performed admirably, despite the fact that he was fully attired as for work (and he does not wear a towel to work -- he's an Engineering Draftsman, not a model advertising saunas. Or is he? ;D).

Me, I also followed normally protocols. These, for me, are:
(a) Cower in fetal position
(b) Shiver
(c) Repeat a and b as necessary

Everyone performed above and beyond the usual and our guest was persuaded out to wide open albeit chilly Western Boston spaces. Mr. J wore a towel later. And I eventually got a chance to say something other than "BAT!" although that took a while.

I wonder how many calories that all burned?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KSGROTHE 3/3/2011 3:07PM

    I'm way behind on your blogs, but this one cracked me up, so I just had to comment:

- Karen

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STRINGS58 2/14/2011 7:24AM

    Ha Ha Ha!! I had a place in college where we had to get out the Bat Persuader! I hope you have had a full recovery! I find I don't burn as many calories as I want to eat when I calm down. emoticon emoticon

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TRACYZABELLE 2/10/2011 2:28AM

    As long as Mr J did not catch a chill! LOL

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WOLFKITTY 2/3/2011 7:50PM


It's a good thing I don't know what your Mister looks like. Instead, I get to picture my own studly man fantasy, in a towel. Without the guilt of picturing YOUR studly man. HEheee.

I love this, Janet.
I'm so glad we're friends!

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MARCHMAID 1/31/2011 9:40PM

    I agree with the Queen. My sympathies are mostly with the bat. Environmentalists only like people in theory. ; )

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TELERIE 1/31/2011 2:42PM

    Real hoopy frood you're married to. I'm glad he knows where his towel is. LOL! Window screen sounds like a good option.

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KENNYWHEELS 1/31/2011 2:24PM

    I looked there is no crouching, shiver in the cardio maybe it's a strength training procedure, but only if you were working the abs in the prone position LOL

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NIMNIX 1/31/2011 1:45PM

    Too much funny. Glad I wasn't drinking something while I read this

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AQUAGIRL08 1/31/2011 11:41AM

    Thanks for the laugh!

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SUNNYESCAPE 1/31/2011 11:11AM

    Too funny!LOL

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4A-HEALTHY-BMI 1/31/2011 11:07AM

    You know, although it sounds like having the window open provides entertainment and exercise, I'm going to mention that they have this awesome invention you should try.

It's called a WINDOW SCREEN. I have them at my house and they do a great job of keeping outside critters out and inside critters (cats) in.

Just thought you might want to know.


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    Every belfry needs its bat.

If you were afraid just imagine how the little bat felt.

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MS.ELENI 1/31/2011 10:52AM

    ROFLMAS Too funny.
Don't you get lost in a 3 story 6 bedroom place.

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PHEBESS 1/31/2011 10:37AM

    LOL - hysterical!!!!!!!

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TWEETYKC00 1/31/2011 9:51AM

    thanks for the much needed pick me up this morning!

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    Too funny! I would be doing the same thing, although I don't know if I could have even gotten the word bat out. Thanks for the entertainment!

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You're a Bird of Paradise

Monday, January 24, 2011

So, it's 9 AM and it's still in the minuses in terms of degrees. These are Fahrenheit temps, not Celsius. We passed the freezing point of water quite a while ago.

It is COLD.

I selected this song because, let's face it, beach scenes are coming one of these days but certainly no time soon. I wanted to look at beaches, swimsuits and people with tans. Bright colors. Cute guys never hurt, either (hey, I'm married, not dead, folks).

As for weight loss, it is stalled. Again.

I am back where I was two weeks ago, exactly. Now, for those of you who have followed my exploits in snow removal and the like, you'll see that I have -- I kid you not -- done at least 60 minutes of cardio every single day. And, a lot of times, it's more like an hour and a half. For those of you who are following my nutritional exploits, you'll see I've been keeping within range.

So, heh, WHAT GIVES?

Actually, I know the answers:
(1) Probably too much cardio. I suspect I could use a rest day somewhere in there, but the fact of the matter is, the snow's gotta be removed. And another major storm is coming on Wednesday. As for non-snow removal cardio, I have NEEDED to get out and outta the house. This tends to be either for a walk or to the gym. So reducing the cardio is not, heh, in the cards right now.
(2) Probably not being absolutely perfectly honest when it comes to portion sizes. This is not a big lie, like a half a twelve-pound chicken and say it's three ounces or anything. It's more like I'm saying something is a quarter-cup when it's closer to a third. I do need to watch more closely, and I could stand to measure more. I don't love doing that -- about the only thing I measure is, of all things, cereal. I admit I need to get more on the stick with that.
(3) It's winter. Yeah. It's freakin' winter, folks. The body, I feel, has a lot of biorhythms that we do not understand. But one of these appears to be clear -- we gain or maintain in the colder weather. Why? It should be obvious. It keeps us warm.

So, while I will redouble my efforts to do a better job at measuring, I won't go insane with everything. My own personal measurements are actually pretty good. A blazer that felt tight a few months ago is better. Things are improving. I suspect there is muscle coming on, and we all know that it weighs more than fat does.

In the meantime, though, I need to be somewhere warm, and a vacation is NOT gonna happen right now. Maybe I'll just get in my swimsuit, throw a towel on the floor in the plant room, get a trashy novel to read and pretend.

Ground Hog Day will be here in 10 days.

Stay warm, folks.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IFDEEVARUNS2 1/29/2011 9:04AM

    I've always suspected that the body did its own thing on its own time! [sigh]

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DDOORN 1/27/2011 3:59PM

    Winter is the absolute PITS!

I've gotta make a better plan for winter up in these northern lats!


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DMPRIDER 1/25/2011 7:54AM

    I hope you can find the right balance. That's what I'm looking for too. I'm trying to up my exercise too, but I have to get the food piece under control. The past year has been really frustrating. I not only can't seem to lose, but I've gained! Ugh.

Anyway, thank you for the video. Fun stuff. And those tropical scenes were wonderful. And the clothes and hair - LOL - thanks for the flashback!

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STRINGS58 1/25/2011 7:05AM

    Yeah, it can be a balance thing can't it? I hope you enjoy taking the rest and feel good that you know you can get in an hour of cardio on a regular basis! You may be able to find some creative ways to shake it up nutritionally. A little soup, extra salad . . . I dunno, I'm working on getting back on track -- need a good rest or there's no umphf for any workout . . .

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LAB-LOVER 1/25/2011 6:13AM

    Wanna come over and shovel? He he!

Don't throw in the towel -- when calories out is greater than calories in, you WILL lose weight. Your body's just on its own schedule!

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MARCHMAID 1/24/2011 10:46PM

    You make me feel like such a slug! Usually I'm the one out there overdoing like mad--not this year.

Makes me furious--I'm probably losing all kinds of muscle and strength because of this and and knee debacle!

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    It is too easy to get out of the habit of measuring. And these days we have changed our diet so I am not as familiar with correct portions. Your blog is a great reminder that I have some room to improve. Thanks

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CODYG123 1/24/2011 4:54PM

    I like what Phebess said. It's about the Siberian ancestors. The human body does not want to loose weight when the weather is frightful.
No matter, you're building muscle and that's good.

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KSGROTHE 1/24/2011 2:32PM

    I had to laugh when you said that about the only thing you measure is cereal, because that's about what I do, too! emoticon

Like another commenter said, maybe you don't need to reduce the cardio but increase the food instead. Counterintuitive, I know, but I've heard it works for some people.

Stay warm! Would watching beach movies help?

- Karen

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MS.ELENI 1/24/2011 9:51AM

    Going in your plant room sounds like a good idea. hang in there. You will get past this stall. emoticon

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PHEBESS 1/24/2011 9:41AM

    Yup, some of us have bodies built for cold weather, and we retain fat cells during that time - something about keeping our ancestors warm while carrying water across Siberia, right?

If you think maybe too much cardio, you could always keep the cardio where it is and put it in the part where you set up your goals - maybe you just need a bit more food. Strange, but true.

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JONATION 1/24/2011 9:35AM

    You're shoveling snow AND walking to the gym? emoticon

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Somewhere Cold and Caked in Snow

Monday, January 17, 2011

I like this song a great deal and -- you guessed it -- snow shoveling has been a major source of cardio for me for days. I have done almost 5 1/2 hours. I will be doing more today.

It's tiring and my left elbow is bugging me a bit, but it's ultimately rather satisfying. My driveway is done. Right now, the only thing that needs doing is the front sidewalk, which is maybe 1/3 cleared. It's clean enough that we would not get ticketed, but more snow and rain are scheduled for tomorrow and Wednesday. Plus it will get cold again, so it'll all refreeze. Better to just get the old stuff cleared out as much as possible.

Oh -- and the 5+ hours wasn't just me. My husband has probably done a good 7+. And, heh, one of my hours was spent digging out my parents. Hence I have dug out from this storm from two separate states (NY and MA). Eek.

It is, though, paying off elsewhere. I lost a good 1.8 lbs. And I lost inches or stayed at status quo in all eight categories that I track. This includes the band and the waist, where I lost 1 3/4 inches in both areas and the thigh, where I lost 3" (most likely due to measuring in a different area but, heh, I don't care. A win's a win!).

So I highly recommend snow shoveling (if your heart, back and knees can take it) for cardio.

But it is kinda tiring.

So excuse me if I nap for a while. Zzz.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DDOORN 1/27/2011 3:57PM

    LOVE snow shoveling! Doubly so while wearing my mp3 player! :-)


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WOLFKITTY 1/22/2011 4:15AM

    Part of me is envious of the free cardio.. The other part, the one that is accustomed to mild temperatures and is a big, wimpy baby, says "no way". I admire you, though! And your strength!


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TRACYZABELLE 1/20/2011 5:32AM

    Congrats on reducing wheeeeeeeeeeeee!!

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ELISEL 1/19/2011 10:38PM

    The snow this winter is killing me. Our driveway is pretty long so there's lots of shoveling. And now they're saying another 6 inches on Friday. We have 4 storms worth of snow in our yard already.

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KSGROTHE 1/18/2011 6:18PM

    emoticon on doing all that shoveling! It's great that you got a loss of pounds and inches to show for it! I hope you enjoyed your well-deserved nap.

I have to say though, reading your blog just reconfirmed for me why I'm glad I don't live somewhere where it snows anymore.

- Karen

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    All those inches. Yes!

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CAROLISCIOUS 1/17/2011 5:39PM

    You get ticketed for too much snow? Seriously?

Maybe I could get ticketed for too much fat? Ya think?

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MARCHMAID 1/17/2011 4:43PM

    i like to shovel but can't--am learning the hard way to take care of myself and do less--against my will!

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PHEBESS 1/17/2011 2:42PM

    Sounds like cardio and strength training combined!

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FIT_TERI 1/17/2011 12:03PM

    The amount of snow we've had is insane. I know you got even more. Oh well, it provides some great exercise. Congrats on the losses of both lbs. and inches. Enjoy your nap!

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MS.ELENI 1/17/2011 11:06AM

    You earned a nap. emoticon

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HEALTHYME47 1/17/2011 10:30AM

    Whew, that makes me tired just reading about all that shoveling! But congrats on the 1.8 lb loss! emoticon

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KARBIE18 1/17/2011 10:29AM

    I actually LOVE shoveling. I like that it gets me outside, and I feel like I've really accomplished something when I get done. Way to go on all the losses!

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You Oughta Know By Now

Monday, January 10, 2011

Okay, that is one odd music video.

The song is ... for a few reasons.

My folks came up for a few days and they brought most of my Dad's old patents. Then the patents had to be hung on the walls. There were 34 of them (no lie). Plus there were a few other things, like Honor Society things for me and whatever. There was a lot of hammering yesterday. The house looks awesome. I will take photos, er, someday.

Now I am going back with them for a few days. Eating and exercise will be weird, spotty and, hopefully, not completely outta control. I will be bagging two networking events and a haircut in order to do this. But I am doing this (here's one of the reasons for the song) because my folks are leaving their house. This is why I got the patents. And so I'm going to help them pack up and cull and I'll get some stuff to take back with me as well. And it's a bit of saying good-bye to the old house, although I've made my farewells to it before. There isn't yet a buyer for it and my folks don't have a new place yet. It's not like it's imminent but it is looming so I figured, get in and do it now, before things become even more unrecognizable. Fortunately, nearly all of my own stuff was gone. I have little of my own emotional investments, at least in the context of my own physical possessions.

But the other part is -- you ever notice, with your folks, you can sometimes just revert straight to the old roles you all played? It is suddenly High School again. I am suddenly a teen. But the reality is, I'm 48 years old. I graduated from High School 31 1/2 years ago. At some point, the roles reverse, I know. As they say, the child becomes the father (mother) of the man (woman). I know that time will be here, soon enough.

In the meantime, though, this is the song I played RIGHT before I left for college. It was the last thing on the old turntable before I packed it in late August of 1979. I came back, of course, for summers and even for a few months after I graduated Law School, in order to study for the Bar. But that moment was the one that got fossilized, petrified into stagnation. When I am with my parents long enough -- and this is, most likely, all on my side rather than on theirs at all -- I am there, August 31, 1979, almost 17. I suspect I'll be there again, for the next few days. I'll have the laptop and will escape to Spark -- an option I wish I'd had in '79.

Y'know, I'm probably just neurotic. After all

You should never argue with a crazy mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mind.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRACYZABELLE 1/12/2011 4:31AM

    Enjoy them while you have them!! What a neat thing to be passed down to you (even though I thought you said most of your dad's old PARENTS" lol

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CAROLISCIOUS 1/11/2011 4:08PM

    What a wonderful heritage being passed to you. Good for you for lending the parents a hand.

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MARCHMAID 1/10/2011 11:33PM

    So many thoughts--can't type so will havt save for face to face conversation : )

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    I hope you put that exercise high on the list. Remind them they came to help when you had your surgery last year. This is a priority now in your life.

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TELERIE 1/10/2011 5:55PM

    Try to enjoy sweet sixteen again, my friend. How good of you to help them cull their possessions. emoticon I don't tend to regress much - it helps having parents who divorced and remarried and moved on to lives I don't have that childhood connection with.

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ONECOOKIETWO 1/10/2011 2:53PM

    I can totally identify with the regressed role situation. Dang. Fortunately, you don't have to live with your parents full-time permanent.

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KSGROTHE 1/10/2011 2:14PM

    That's awesome that your dad had 34 patents and let you have them all to frame! I heard that my great-grandfather had a patent (don't know if there were others), and I have no idea what became of those papers after my grandmother died last summer. I suspect it's in a file cabinet with my uncle who is too overwhelmed to deal with all her papers.

I totally know what you mean about reverting to being a teen when you're around your parents! I have this problem when I go back to visit them! It usually reminds me why it's a good thing that I live so far away from them. It seems my sisters fall into the child roles of letting my dad take care of them too much since they live close by. When I visit, it's easy to fall into the old roles with my dad since he wants to pay for all our meals and drive us everywhere. (We stay in a hotel now rather than trying to stay at my parents' or sisters' houses, but I usually borrow my dad's car to avoid having to rent a car ... or rely on him to drive us places!)

Good luck with helping your parents! I'm sure you'll do great!

- Karen

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DDOORN 1/10/2011 10:23AM

    SUCH an easy thing to do...slipping back into old, well-worn roles and choreographed maneuvers...!

But we get better and better at spotting those slips and either avoiding them altogether or recovering with greater speed! :-)


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FIT_TERI 1/10/2011 9:40AM

    I know I revert at times, and I can sometimes see my brother doing it. My silent "no, don't say that. don't go there" messages to him don't seem to ever work. It kind of makes sense. There aren't many (maybe not any) relationships stronger....just due to how they're formed. Maybe knowing it's likely to happen can help you avoid it.

Good luck. MS.ELENI is right....they're lucky to have you to help them.

Oh, and I was always partial to the lyrics "Who needs a house out in Hackensack?
Is that all you get for your money?" This annoyed my mother to no end. We lived in a house about 2 miles from Hackensack. :)

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MS.ELENI 1/10/2011 9:26AM

    It sounds like your parents are downsizing and I think that is a wise move.They are lucky to have a daughter willing to help.

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HEALTHYME47 1/10/2011 8:32AM

    Enjoyed this blog! I don't dare play the Billy Joel song or I'll get it stuck in my head...I would hate that. LOL I will be 48 this month, so right there with ya sistah.

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STRINGS58 1/10/2011 8:13AM

    I watched my mother-in-law be the angry and easily upset teenager with her dad who was 98, in the nursing home (clear headed) but she felt others were getting his attention (he sees us once a year). So, sigh! yes, and it's weird thinking that might happen to my kids. But, I see my son doing it to himself! He does the things he used to do (staying up all night playing video games) but he wouldn't have to -- though, I suspect he does that in college anyway, as he gets off work around 3 am.

so, rambling, you are different from high school! And you will keep moving out into your own. I hope the upcoming stressors turn out to be nothing!

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KARBIE18 1/10/2011 7:53AM

    I think it's very common to revert - enjoy being seventeen again!! Hope you get a chance a chance to squeeze some movement in here and there, even if it's for short bits. It definitely seems to make everything easier.

Wow! 34 patents??

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Racing Through the Human Jungles at Night

Monday, January 03, 2011

I wish the video had the full intro as it is one of the greatest rock riffs ever -- it builds with all sorts of instruments, almost like how an orchestra does its thing.

Anyway. Onto the blog entry.

I came across a great cartoon in the Sunday paper yesterday and I just had to share it. It was a buncha teenagers and tweens, and the caption was just, "We're bored with 2011."

And I was thinking -- now, I recognize that life isn't always perfectly exciting. Most of our lives are spent doing things like waiting in lines, filling gas tanks, paying bills and washing clothes. Life has few moments of greatness, like the moment you say "I do" or you see your child for the first time, or you say good-bye to someone you loved very much, or you graduate, or the house lights come up to thunderous applause for you.

It's funny because we, as a civilized species, have been this way forever -- we record and commemorate and celebrate the hole in one, the prize heifer and the handing down of the tablets from Mount Sinai, but what is often missing from our historical accounts are the way we REALLY live, and have lived. It's hard to know how the ancient Egyptians really lived. I mean the working people, not the Pharaohs. I bet they scolded their children when they were naughty, argued with their spouses over money and forgot to pick up their dirty clothes, sometimes, too.

We, as people, as dieting people for, let's face it, that's the segment of the population we are all in -- we tend to celebrate the big successes all too well. The Personal Record in the run. The new low on the scale. The mastery of a new recipe. The triumph of saying no to the candy dish for the first time.

But what about all of those other times? The ones where we forget to celebrate? You know, where you go out and run because you like it, and you do eh, but you don't care, because it's fun and you got exercise and you spent time with friends and supported a good cause and just plain did something out of your comfort zone? Or where you don't even notice the candy dish because you've passed it by so many times? Or where you make the good-for-you-and-good-for-everyone foods because you just do -- because that's how you cook and you don't even think about it and no one else does, because that's just what you cook?



They have meaning, too. They are the fabric of our lives and, for real, they are more. Because there's only one first time. There's only one best time (although it can change). But there can be a million other times.

Let's not forget about those as we seek out the first times and the best times. We're going to have an awful lot more of those "other" times.

Let's give them their due.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    I loved the blog. Reminds me of the title of a book ... Today is Just the kind of day I hoped it would be. It suggested we say that every single day TODAY IS JUST THE KIND OF DAY I HOPED IT WOULD BE.

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KSGROTHE 1/7/2011 8:52PM

    Well, I'm just catching up on the last 2 of your blogs. I think you're saying here that we need to recognize and celebrate our good habits, the ones that have become so automatic that it's easy to forget that we have actually do them. Sometimes, one gets an epiphany, a realization that, "Hey, I'm doing this good thing that I would not have done before I decided to live a healthy lifestyle, and I've been doing it for a while now." Perhaps more reflection is in order to recognize these occurences more often.

Great blog! Happy New Year! I'm sure you'll make 2011 a great year!

- Karen

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STRINGS58 1/4/2011 6:34AM

    It is something to create a new weave and even a new design in the fabric -- as I'm waking up to do my boot camp video and reading your blog, this relates to me more with scales as I return to orchestra rehearsal tonight. It is a joy to get that interval right, but most people don't know the hours of practice as they only see the performance.

cheers emoticon to all the little installments that create the fabric that we really like in our lives! (and thanks for the Mellancamp! emoticon)

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TRACYZABELLE 1/4/2011 5:56AM

    I have to say I dont get bored often-- there is a new adventure around every corner~~

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CAROLISCIOUS 1/3/2011 8:18PM's to the million other times.

Like like like!

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TELERIE 1/3/2011 6:02PM

    Thanks for the reminder to give ourselves a pat on the back for all of THOSE reasons and to celebrate each day because it's got LIFE in it.

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4A-HEALTHY-BMI 1/3/2011 4:13PM

    Yup. And it's the consistency that matters more than the high points. Without the consistency there wouldn't BE high points...

Keep on keeping on!


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DDOORN 1/3/2011 11:03AM

    Excellent point!

We enrich our lives when we can give ourselves credit for making those zillion healthy choices which result in those greater milestones!

And the more our lives are rich and full of meaningful action, the less likely we'll develop that craving for food to fill the void of an empty life.


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MS.ELENI 1/3/2011 10:27AM

    another good one. Your blogs always make us stop and think. Thanks for sharing

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MARCHMAID 1/3/2011 9:52AM

    Nice. Well said. See ya 'round--in both ordinary and extraordinary times. : )

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HEALTHYME47 1/3/2011 8:43AM

    Yes, you hit the nail on the head - we need to celebrate the little things too! You have a great attitude!

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THISISFORME924 1/3/2011 7:07AM

    Great insight!

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LAB-LOVER 1/3/2011 6:50AM

    You mean its possible NOT to notice the candy dish....


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