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See Chameleon

Thursday, May 21, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHoPYLQvnQM

It's time for the month in review. And, since I'll be off to Cape Cod for a few days with the Dude, I may not be around much until Monday or so. The laptop will be with us but I really just want it to check food and directions.

Without further ado.

It has been, eek, one year and four months since I started alli, and close to one year and three months since I started Spark.

Weight

I started off at 346 lbs. I am now 199.2. I've been stuck at that weight for a few weeks but it's under 200 so I'm happy.

Meaurements

Bicep 12.5" This is tied for a personal best. Originally, it was 19", so it's down 6.5"
Bust 41" Originally, it was 55", so it's down 14" Good golly, Miss Molly!
Band 35.75" Originally, it was 47.5", so it's down 11.75"
Waist 35.75" Originally, it was 49", so it's down 13.25"
Belly 39" Originally, it was 59.5", so it's down an astounding 20.5"
Keister 46.25" Originally, it was 64", so it's down a pretty dang cool 17.75"
Hip 42.75" Originally, it was 54.5", so it's down 11.75" This is lagging as my belly continues to drop. It'll be at my knees before the end of this journey.
Thigh 22" Originally, it was 32.5", so it's down 10.5"

My average inch loss is 13.125" (over a foot, baby!)
My average inch loss without the outlyers (Bicep and thigh) is 14 2/3"

No wonder I don't have to turn to the side to get by anywhere near as often as I used to.

Sizes

Oh, WOW.

I started off as a 3x/4x/26/28 up top and a 4x/28 below.

I am currently a 14 all around but the other day I got on (as in, zipped AND buttoned!) two pairs of size 10 slacks.

Now, they were stretchy and all, plus I had not just a muffin top but the whole dang bakery.

But STILL!

They will be wearable by the end of the Summer if not earlier.

As for up top, Mediums are a hit or miss right now. I bought myself a Land's End size Medium (10-12) Winter jacket for next year. Except for having to scootch it just a tad on the hips, it already fits.

Anybody want/need a nice size 1X systems-style (it's a Columbia Sportswear knockoff) Winter Jacket? It's blue and white and very warm.

Oh and I also started off as a 44DD (really should have been a 52D, but I was too vain to actually buy a bra that fit me back then).

I am now a 38C. Ooh la la ....

Body Reconfiguration

Aside from the obvious info re sizes and measurements, my body is absolutely changing. With my remaining belly fat sliding into my hip area, I've ended up with what is not hard to see as a flat-esque stomach, a characteristic I have never had, not even when I was 16.

My face continues to get more angular, and resembles how I looked in High School. I am a 1979 graduate.

And I weighed 124 then.

Holy cow.

Fun Stuff

Hey, I was actually on television!

I feel like I've mentioned it a thousand times already, but I really and truly was. See:
http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public
_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=1996117
Spark People set it up, with a huge shoutout and thank you to GrantM, publicist extraordinaire and all-around cool dude. Please show him some love -- he does a lot of fantastic things around here and they mostly go unnoticed.

So, it is, right now, weird as anything to mention the TV thing and know that I've done it. But it does offer some renewed motivation. And, as a result, I also ended up being mentioned in my company newsletter. Now, I swear this is true, I've had people from other departments ask me what I eat for breakfast.

Food

With warmer weather coming (someday), the chicken soup meal had to be put into semi-retirement until October or so. Who wants soup on a hot day?

Hence I concocted a tomato-coconut curry sauce. It's fabulous over rice. The new replacement meal will be chicken, tofu, brown rice, mixed vegetables and the aforementioned sauce. We'll enjoy the whole meal (we've just been dabbling with the sauce so far) in a couple of weeks. Can't miss bean week, dontcha know.

Exercise

I continue to make sure I visit my gym three days per week. If I don't work at the end of the week, I cram three days of the gym into the start of the week, and vice versa. I do feel that a rest day in between is helpful. And it's not like I rest or anything: I still lift weights and walk. But three days in a row (like I did this week) is still somewhat tiring for me.

The average amount of calories I burn in a typical gym session is about 325 and rising. When I started off, it was around 200 calories less than that for the same amount of time.

I have also been grabbing more fitness opportunities. Going out to play frisbee with Mr. J. Getting off a stop or two before mine. Walking around downtown with my mentor. Jogging to the printer. Fitness is all around, you just have to grab it.

Overall

I feel pretty good. I am around 55 above my goal and, since I've been plateauing a bit, that's something of a drag. But I am otherwise doing marvelously well if I do say so myself, and I'm happily looking for newer and better ways to do what needs to be done.
While I love Boston Terriers, maybe my avatar really should be a chameleon.

Off to the Cape.

PS I urge you to click the Youtube link and see just how cheesy a video can be. The dang thing's got cholesterol!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JESPAH 5/24/2009 3:18PM

    Hope you don't mind but I came home to a mountain of what to do -- individual love is there -- I just be too tired right now. Sleep hugs! Zzzz ;)

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MARCHMAID 5/23/2009 4:34AM

    This is so amazing. Makes me tired and hungry just reading it. (Just kidding.) Simple congratulations don't seem enough. But you have mine! Good golly, if you can do it maybe I can too--isn't that what they all say?


emoticon

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NYAYNE 5/22/2009 9:00AM

    The first word that came to mind, inspiration. Keep up the great work.
You have motivated me to kick it up a notch!

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KUNGFOOD 5/21/2009 8:13PM

    Ever mindful of PostScripts, I came back by to check out Slade.
Awesome!
emoticon emoticon

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LAB-LOVER 5/21/2009 7:23PM

    Fabulous! Congratulations on all that you've done to re-make your body and your mind! It does slow down as you approach goal, but I'm trying to think of it as practice in maintaining!
-LL

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KSGROTHE 5/21/2009 4:47PM

    emoticon You're doing great!

As a child of the 80's (graduated in '89), I vaguely remember that song, but I don't think I ever saw that cheesy video before! Thanks for sharing! emoticon

Keep up the good work!

- Karen

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SWEETZMIX 5/21/2009 3:46PM

    Janet I will check out the video posted on Grant's blog when I get home from work. I hope you enjoy your time away & don't use the cpu unless it's necessary. Enjoy yourself. I love your transformation!! Just amazing..keep working hard. And like KUNGFOOD said, it is just the beginning for you!!

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TELERIE 5/21/2009 2:56PM

    Have a great vacation - I'll look forward to your next update on the life of the incredible shrinking woman. You continue to inspire!

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BELIEVINGISEING 5/21/2009 11:45AM

    You are so awesome. Have a great time and have some fun. What a journey you have had. Amazing weight loss and attitude. You are living the life. Pam

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GREENLILY 5/21/2009 10:19AM

    The Amazing J!!! :) Have a lovely vacation... You deserve it! :)

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KUNGFOOD 5/21/2009 9:11AM

    Astounding and awesome. That's just the beginning of the alphabet of praises that I'm sending your way. Beautiful, babe!
emoticon emoticon
Have fun, drive safely.


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QUEENOTHEFOREST 5/21/2009 8:58AM

    Fantastic month (and more) in review. Just what I needed this morning.

I am headed to the Cape tomorrow night. Can't wait. Neither can silly Milly. I hope to follow your footsteps in more ways than a trip to the Cape.
M

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I Know You're a Real Koo Koo

Monday, May 18, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AsId-qVIb4

Well, maybe you aren't. But I know I surely am.

It's inevitable, I suppose. It's that all of the things that make me up as quirky or odd have also manifested themselves in my weight loss journey. And that's not a bad thing.

When I first started, I absolutely hated, hated, hated the idea of drinking water. Water? Brr and blech, at the same time. Cold and bland was not going to cut it, and keep in mind that I started in January. In New England. Ice was not going to be in my vocabulary unless I was slipping on it in front of my neighbor's driveway.

So I changed it up, and realized that the water did not have to be barely warm enough to be liquid for it to provide me with a benefit. Now, it's not absolutely, positively 100% ultra stupendously perfect. It would be, I suppose, if it were cold as anything, and not have a decaf tea bag dunked in it, or sweetener thrown in it, or a flavor stick dissolved in it. Yes, if it were frigid and bland, I might -- just might, if I was really good and lucky and the stars and planets were all properly aligned -- lose .0000000000001% more weight than the way I have it, which is either boiling or close to it, with one or more of the aforesaid flavor options going on.

But I don't care. It doesn't matter. The flavor sticks, the steam, the sweetener, they make it possible for me to drink the water. Take them away and virtually no water is drunk. So which is worse? A flavor stick and a higher temperature, or no water? Gee, whaddaya think?

Same with the bottle or cup. For me it's about ritual. It's not exactly a Japanese tea service, but I like having my mugs. My bottles. My little sticks all lined up and ready to go. My tea bags. I sound like I've got OCD, but it helps me to remember -- drink four of these and the daily water requirements are done.

Walking isn't always easy to fit in. So I get off two stops earlier and, get this! I don't even count it. It's just serendipity. I pretend to myself that the bus broke down or it was going express and that was the closest I could get to my home. In the meantime, I still walk.

And then there's sweets. On my page it says that a part of my plan is lying to myself about why chocolate is evil. Well, of course chocolate isn't evil. Morality doesn't enter into it. There may be less than pure morals on the part of manufacturers of foods that are not so good for us. Yeah, I'll buy that. But food? Once it's ready for the table (unless you eat exceptionally fresh -- e. g. still swimming -- sushi), it has no consciousness, no mind. But I tell myself a little story anyway. And the story goes something like this. I don't eat red meat or pork. This has been true since age 13 for red meat and since age 0 for pork. So far, so good. Hence I tell myself, when something looks particularly tempting, that it's made from lard. Look, beef-flavored cookies! Wow, how'd they put a whole ham inside a cheesecake? Amazing how it says french fries, and they seem to be made with potatoes, but didja know they're really made up of pork? That pie is really a cleverly disguised burger, dontcha know.

I push foods away from me, if I have to sit at a table with them. Sure, I can reach a foot or so, but I don't. Eh, it's too much effort. Those tortilla chips are SO far away. They could be on Mars for all I know. I cannot bring myself to make the effort to grab one. Or a dozen.

Like my friend said to me when talking about the side effects I can get from taking alli: People Need to Get Over it. And he's right. Long as I do what I'm doing, the ick factor is minimized. And I'm not going to let it stand in the way of me taking the help I need, and getting this done. I'm not going to put squeamishness ahead of my health. I'll barrel through, and get over it, and set my mind onto it in whatever way I can spin it so that I make sure to do it. That's another thing I do because it needs to be done.

So, yeah, I'm a little nuts. But the gist of it all is that I do these little things, and I follow these little rituals, and they help me to get where I need to be. And, don't be so quick to laugh -- I bet you've got a few of these, too. A special mug. The right pair of shorts. The perfect go-to recipe for just when it looks like you won't have time to do much of anything other than dive headfirst into a gallon of Rocky Road.

Whatever you need.

Whatever it takes.

Whatever works.

Even if we all look a lil weird while doing so.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EMMASMART 5/20/2009 3:47PM

    I like my water hot, cold and luke warm. I have kidney stones so that's just survival. Cheesecake is often maid with Gelatin which is beef so you are right. The popcorn that leaves a greasy film on the roof of you mouth.. LARD. Some cookies are also made with lard (esp those from chinese restaraunts - get the lechee nuts instead.) So when you are imagining you might not be far off.

I'm so proud of what you accomplished. And glad to wear your cast offs. It's the most amazing thing. Alli works for you, and you can do this and that is a very good thing.

Emma

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GREENLILY 5/19/2009 9:39AM

    LOL! I know EXACTLY where you are coming from! Although, personally, I've been a "nothing but water" drinker since I was a kid. Sweet drinks (unless it is lemon iced-tea) never really appealed to me... though I'm not a fan of hot drinks either. So I guess I am a bit koo koo... :)

I think we all have our "little" quirks as to what gets us through the day. For me, water must be in a GLASS glass, and cold enough to have come off an arctic glacier... If I'm trying desperately not to eat something I shouldn't have, I think about eating something that completely turns my stomach (i.e. - cheap, greasy grocery store popcorn - you know, the one that leaves a greasy coating on the roof of your mouth - ECCCKKKK) and that sometimes helps to turn me right off...

And... sometimes weird is good...

emoticon

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CAPECODDIN 5/19/2009 8:08AM

    Okay... I gotta admit I had to read this 3 times to actually get it... well, I think I got it... ha ha...

Obviously you have a very powerful mind.. and can manipulate yourself in a GOOD way... keep up the good work!!

emoticon

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WOLFKITTY 5/19/2009 3:13AM

    I agree, good for you! Find what works and get to it, forget the excuses! :D
Way to go!
Jocelyn

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TELERIE 5/19/2009 2:16AM

    Whops - trigger happy fingers double posted.

Comment edited on: 5/19/2009 2:16:48 AM

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TELERIE 5/19/2009 2:16AM

    Oh, I've got plenty of quirky rituals. My morning ritual on the wii fit starts me off - I need that number to record on my excel sheet (LOL - the day isn't complete without it!) Then I fill my water bottle, snap on my pedometer, pack my HRM in my gym bag, pick up the wrapped lunch my darling makes every day for me (I'm so lucky!) and make my oatmeal.
I have my green tea when I get to work and all those things help keep me on track at the start of my day. It's even better if I manage to hit the gym before getting to the office.

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BELIEVINGISEING 5/18/2009 9:16PM

    I usually use a britta pitcher but if I have to drink bottled water , ice mountain. No offense but I hate Aquafina. It has more of a plastic bottle tate to me. If you drink tea you are supposed to drink 2 glasses of water for everyone of tea. It dehydrates you. At least that is what my Doctor says. But you need to do it your way. Whatever works for you. I have some friends who love Aquafina too. I guess it is just my taster LOL. Have a great day. Pam

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LAB-LOVER 5/18/2009 8:32PM

    Too funny... I have a ritual water bottle. Its an aquafina bottle with a wide mouth. Anything else doesn't cut it. No fancy camping store bottles for me. The plastic ones can get lost and I don't care. I buy another. Not the most "green" but it works. Spare me the Polar bottles, the Dasani, they won't do! I love my aquafina!

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The New Thing, the New Swing

Monday, May 11, 2009

natsaan.vox.com/library/audio/6a00f4
8cddf9d9000201101671a752860d.html


I selected this song because it's silly in any language (the words are here if you're interested: www.emilieclairebarlow.com/music.php
?albumid=1&trackid=3
. The non-English language is Brazilian Portuguese.

But I also selected it because it's different and it shakes things up and that is one of the big ways that I keep myself motivated.

I am, by nature, a rut person. I get something comfortable and I stick with it, long after I've dug a trench in the carpet.

This is not necessarily such an awful thing because, after all, if it keeps me doing right by myself then that's excellent.

But it can get ... dull.

And that's when the trouble starts.

It's the little things first.

* Oh, it's raining out. Can't go for my walk.
* Oh, they put the dressing on the salad instead of the side. I won't bother the server. I'll just eat it this way anyway.
* Oh, I forgot to track my food today. I'll just keep it my head (and then it flies out as a million other things take its place).
* Oh, my sneakers are old. I won't replace them.
* Oh, this old thing used to be big on me. Now it fits again. I'll keep it just in case.
* Oh, this old thing used to fit me. Now it's too small for me.

And on and on and on.

It's very easy to slide down that slope.

But if you shake things up, you get and keep your motivation. How about these internal monologues instead?

* If I hadn't walked today, I wouldn't've seen that hawk.
* I got my cardio planting vegetables today. Can't wait for fresh peas!
* I figured out how to make my own low fat, low salt tomato sauce. Cooking for myself is kinda cool.
* The fishmonger and the butcher and the produce guy all want to help me choose something healthy. They're such nice people.
* The server doesn't mind fixing my salad when I ask nicely. A little extra tip for her doesn't hurt, either.
* I got new sneakers! I'm gonna go break 'em in!
* I bought this top and it seemed like it was made for a child when I first got it. Now it fits!
* My bigger clothes are going to my friends who are also trying to lose weight. I like helping people out.

Here's another way to get and keep motivation: measure yourself as often as you weigh yourself. Don't just rely on the scale for your good news. I personally love numbers and charts and graphs (I'm such a geek) so for me there is really something magical about seeing a graphed slope go down (in a good way, of course). Even for weeks when I haven't lost weight (which includes this one, for those of you keeping score at home), so what? I've lost something like 20" off my belly.

Yeah, you read that right. 2 feet off is coming hard on the heels of that.

That's more fun than any sitting around, and it's tastier than any extra dressing that 'accidentally' got on my salad. That, my friends, is motivation on the rocks, with a twist.

Speaking of a twist, I'm motivated to do a little cardio, which will definitely get my coworkers talking.

Maybe a samba.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ZELDAMARIE 5/17/2009 9:39AM

    I totally agree and May mornings in Michigan where I am are beautiful . My walks give me peace with the smell of lilacs and the flowers and trees blooming. I never regret going for a walk once I do it. emoticon

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ANJOLENA43 5/16/2009 7:49AM

    Thank you so much for the motivation. You are so right. If we look at things differently, we can keep a positive attitude and our motivation for this journey.

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BELIEVINGISEING 5/14/2009 4:50PM

    I am so in a rut. I am the rut Queen LOL. Nice blog, good ideas and motivation. My problem right now is I am so tired and am not even exercising. got to get up and do it! You are doing a great job. Keep it going. Pam

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LLNLBLOG 5/13/2009 12:21PM

    This is a great post for me to read. I did not see the prompt but I really need to learn how to stay motivated. I am addicted to comfort and don't wont to do anything new, but I get bored that way. I guess the answer is don't fix it until it stops working. I'm okay doing the same routine for the most part but when I stop losing weight than I know its time for a change.

I really appreciate the examples of a new way to think.

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WIFEALF 5/12/2009 4:01PM

    Thanks for the motivation this is good!I get in a rut too at times.Thanks for this.It keeps me thinking positive!!!!!

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ENERGYONE 5/12/2009 2:53PM

    Thank you so very much. I am in need of motivation and your blog sure did inspire me. I get into ruts also and when I get bored that's when I slide. I'm walking 1.5 miles everyday rain or shine in 30 minutes. That is more than what I was doing 2 months ago. So again, thanks.

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SEONAG 5/12/2009 1:29PM

    Wow, you have so many good ideas. I am a rut person too. It sounds like you are really not letting yourself get trapped there. emoticon

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IMCONFESSIN 5/12/2009 1:22PM

    Nice track! Maybe you'd like "Sprout and the Bean" by Joanna Newsom

I chart my stuff, too. Yours is interesting. A 'distance' chart. I just chart a weight every week, for myself, and my co-workers. It's a colorful roller-coaster chart of hills, valleys, and crossed swords. Ha!

Well done!



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GREENLILY 5/12/2009 12:44PM

    Thanks for the MOTIVATION!!! :) I think I need to climb back out of my rut! :)

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GRANIJANI 5/12/2009 12:10PM

    I love the song and I love your message. You are doing great!! I just started so I have the beginners motivation helping me along. I'll keep your helpful words in mind when I fall Into that rut!! emoticon

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CYCLINGSANDY 5/12/2009 7:18AM

    To keep from getting in a rut I make new challenges for myself. I ride longer or choose a different route for my bike ride. I enter in Bike Runs on Saturdays. Also, I change my Ipod music every couple of weeks.It's working because I am more fit and my endurance is more amazing than it was seven months ago.

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LAB-LOVER 5/11/2009 10:17PM

    20" -- wow!
I just bought a pair of 29" waist jeans and my old ones are 40" -- numbers like that don't lie! And yours is EVEN MORE impressive (not comparing, mind you).
I tend to get in ruts too... so I will take your advice to heart!

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CAREWREN 5/11/2009 5:29PM

    A "rut person". I like that way of saying it. The familiar, even when not so hot, is easier than changing. I think ruts are so comforting! However, it would be nice to get into a healthy rut for a change!

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TELERIE 5/11/2009 4:35PM

    Many great ideas to keep motivation sparking! You're doing awesome J!
And I love the song! I've not heard her version before, but heard it performed by Joćo Gilberto - check out the Youtube version with two grown men quacking like a duck - It's hilarious - and they do pull it off!

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CAREWREN 5/11/2009 2:29PM

    20 inches??? Wow! I am so impressed. You are doing great and you also have a good sense of who you are and what the most likely traps are for you.
emoticon

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KSGROTHE 5/11/2009 1:36PM

    You're doing a great job! I love this blog! I need to work on my motivation all the time.

Keep up the good work!

- Karen

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And All the Roads We Have to Walk Are Winding

Monday, May 04, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hzrDeceEKc

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall

199.2 this morning, first time since 1991.

I had all of these profound ideas of what to say, and I had the song planned since I hit 299, but dammit I'm just sitting here weeping.

There is no maybe about it.

You ARE the ones who saved me.

Thank you from the bottom, top and all of the sides of my heart.

I love you all.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EMMASMART 5/9/2009 8:56AM

    I'm weeping with you. This is so wonderful. Oh my!

Emma

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QUEENOTHEFOREST 5/8/2009 7:18AM

    Super news! Happy Happy News!

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BFITAT50 5/6/2009 11:04PM

    Fantastic! Awesome! Amazing! You did it!!!!

Giving you a standing "O" right now! Hoo-ah! emoticon emoticon

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JENIFIREHARP 5/6/2009 10:42PM

    emoticon on Onederland and emoticon on being Motivator of the day!

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FIT_TERI 5/6/2009 9:44PM

    What an amazing accomplishment. Eb is right, amazing is not even the word. Congratulations.

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DEANAC20 5/6/2009 8:23AM

    An amazing inspiration! Way to go!! emoticon

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DEANAC20 5/6/2009 8:23AM

    An amazing inspiration! Way to go!! emoticon

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ELLIE381 5/6/2009 7:44AM

    Congratulations, what a wonderful motivator. You have done such a great job.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. emoticon emoticon

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TRACYZABELLE 5/6/2009 3:00AM

    Congrats on finding onederland! HOw awesome!

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SWEETZMIX 5/5/2009 12:35PM

    emoticon amazing is not even the word!! emoticon

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KUZINKEITH 5/5/2009 10:35AM

    emoticon emoticon

I am so thrilled to join in the celebration of your victory --- there is hope for all of us when we keep on walking that winding road.

PEACE
KEITH

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CAREWREN 5/5/2009 10:28AM

    Way to go, my friend! No matter what help you got from SP and all of us, you did it! I'm sitting here grinning from ear to ear!


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VALERIEMAHA 5/5/2009 10:13AM

    Happy Destiny being my buddy, I was curious about a blog he posted on called "And All the Roads We Have to Walk Are Winding." And now I know why...YOU ARE AWESOME!!! Approaching ONE HUNDRED FIFTY POUNDS gone, lost, assigned to the black hole of the furtherest universe!!!!!!!!!

It must feel sooooooooo good to be so light, both emotionally and physically!

Keep on keepin' on! You're a emoticon

Blessed be -- from one quirky soul to another!
Maha
BTW, loved the music!

I assume you are *tuned in* to the Stand By Me phenomenon --
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=Us-TVg40ExM
Producer Mark Johnson was interveiwed on NPR yesterday --
http://www.npr.org/templates/
player/mediaPlayer.html?action=
1&t=1&islist=false&id=103715874
&m=103769825
and I learned that a DVD/CD became available April 29...and of course I ordered it immediately --
http://www.amazon.com/Songs-A
round-World-CD-DVD/dp/B001QOOCT
E/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qi
d=1241532623&sr=8-1


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HAPPY-DESTINY 5/5/2009 9:19AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DETERMINED_ME 5/4/2009 2:37PM

    Oh Jes! Congrats! There are no words to describ how happy I am for you!

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EM_CLARK1 5/4/2009 2:22PM

    Yeah, Jes! Congrats on making it to Onederland!!!

:) Erin

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TCEDEROTH 5/4/2009 2:09PM

    Oh Jes. Congratulations. I haven't been on in months and your blog is the first place I came to when I logged in. I just had to see how you were doing, and now I'm weeping too.

You have done an amazing job and have been an inspiration to so many others as well. You're almost there girl!
emoticon

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2BMYOWN 5/4/2009 1:02PM

    Well, I think you deserve a big old emoticon for such a wonderful accomplishment! Kudos!

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KSGROTHE 5/4/2009 1:01PM

    emoticon

You're doing great!

emoticon

- Karen

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TELERIE 5/4/2009 8:44AM

    YOU did that! What an achievement! Big HUGS!

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LILMYSTERY 5/4/2009 8:30AM

    That is just so incredibly wonderful! ! ! I can't even express in words how happy I am for you - I got all teary-eyed reading your blog.

You did it. And there is nothing more wonderful than that. :)

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ALLIEDRAGONFLY 5/4/2009 8:00AM

    emoticon
Good job! You did it...
Allie

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A Dreamer of Pictures I Run in the Night

Monday, April 27, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4JJ70SBKWeA

Sure the nutrition tracker has helped me. I suspect it helps most people.

Way back, before Spark, before alli, before I buckled down and got into getting healthy, before, before, before, before, back when three quarters of a bag of potato chips would disappear and I wouldn't know where it went, before and back to when someone in college dared me to eat a whole large pizza and I did, and back to cleaning my plate and all of that, back, back, back, somewhere in there portions were lost.

And in their place came greed, and stuffing, and piling. Dinner wasn't dinner, it was excavating layer upon layer of fat-sugar-salt-carbs, over and over again. Sure, sometimes fat-sugar-salt-carbs was Mexican. Sometimes it was Greek. Or Italian. Or kosher style. Or Chinese. But it was always fat-sugar-salt-carbs.

Sanity had to return. The dinner plate had to stop looking like a strip mining operation in Morgantown, West Virginia. It had to turn back into pieces and care and choices and waiting.

Yes, waiting. I don't mean waitstaff, although that's a part of it. It's the feeling of not so instant gratification. Of anticipation. Of small delays, and how they improve the process.

And it was about experimenting with flavor, with things that didn't strictly fit into the old fat-sugar-salt-carbs mold. Things like fresh vegetables, and fruits, like dairy and proteins and spices. Yes, cinnamon!

Tracking all of that has a meaning that goes beyond calories or carbs or points. It is a diary of what you did, how you felt, how you took care of yourself. There is still excavating, yes. It is still an archaeological expedition. But it's not to the base of a seemingly bottomless mass of food. Rather, it is a trip through nutrition, all laid out for all time and all to see, a record of accomplishments and, yes, of slipups and poor choices sometimes. For they are a part of all of this.

It is a journey into the self.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EMMASMART 5/9/2009 8:53AM

    Great writing as usual. I have recently found that tumeric, garlic and chili powder makes my morning eggs into something fabulous. But I change it up. With nothing, with garlic, chili powder only. All of them together. It helps push the hey, I have eaten button.

Emma

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LLNLBLOG 4/29/2009 11:34AM

    What great post! I love reading about my bad habits in a fun and forgiving way. Thank you for taking the shame out of self neglect and sharing about your new found self respect.

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LANILUNA1 4/29/2009 1:41AM

  I enjoyed how poetic you were in this blog! :) and i like your background about being 'DONE' with being fat. *sigh* ! thanks for sharing the motivation

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TELERIE 4/28/2009 5:30PM

    I just LOVE your blogs!! Thanks for being wonderful!

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CAREWREN 4/28/2009 9:32AM

    Thanks for putting that out there for us to see, relate to, and gain inspiration from. And, thanks for starting your blog entries with a song!
emoticon

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MADERINE 4/27/2009 8:55PM

    Ah! You're my cinnamon girl!

This was such a great, well-written, thoughtful blog post. Thank you for sharing it with all of us.

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ANEWVERSIONOFME 4/27/2009 8:38PM

    Great Blog!!!

The nutrition tracker has helped me in so many ways. I now know what a true portion of meat looks like, I can eyeball a half a cup of veggies, and I'm calculating everybody's lunch at work while they are eating...hahahah! emoticon

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LAB-LOVER 4/27/2009 8:14PM

    Ah... this was one of those rare times when I had to check the song for lyrics. Dang! I couldn't name the tune, and I knew that one too!

Your line about the strip mining operation just simply cracked me up!

I confess that I am *still* learning about good foods, and some days I don't do so well. It's easier to grab a powerbar for lunch than concoct something healthy. But it's working for me for now, so I go with it. Some days are better than others, but it's all a learning experience!

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KCHIESA 4/27/2009 7:57PM

  What an awesome blog! I totally feel you.

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