JESPAH   175,213
SparkPoints
100,000 or more SparkPoints
 
 
JESPAH's Recent Blog Entries

To Make That Day Last Long

Monday, February 16, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtaU3USDYC0

Personally, I find Valentines' Day to be kinda silly although when I was younger such was not the case.

Oh no. I bought right into the hype. Oh no! I need a man! I need love! I need to be completed somehow.

What a loada hooey.

I'm very complete by myself, thank you very much. I suppose that's a part of what happens when you hit 30, 40 and see them slide far away and into the distance. You realize that it's hype, it's junk, it's fantasy, it's stupid.

Now, perhaps you're saying, well jes, you wouldn't feel that way if you were alone. I dunno, perhaps you're a little bit right there, but I think flowers are lovely but don't need Hallmark to tell me when to send or receive them. Nor do I need cards to express my love although I do send them, but it's more about how the recipients feel (not just my husband but also my nephews, my brother, my brother-in-law and my father and father-in-law). If a few bucks' worth of cards and postage -- and my time -- makes them feel good, them I'm all for that.

I recall college, a gal devastated when Valentines' Day came and went and she was without a boyfriend. Well, she was without a boyfriend for the other 364 days of the year as well. I'm sure she didn't feel optimal on all of those days, either, but it was Valentines' Day when it all came to a head. Tears and everything. "Oh, I'm all alone!"

"No," I'd say, "I'm with you."

"But it's not the same!"

"Okay, well, it's not, but it's not nothing."

"But you see, I need this!"

"But you function just fine without it for most days. Not to say it's not good, but is it a need?"

"I need it!"

"Well, okay, maybe you do. But in the meantime, how about accepting what you have?"

I probably wasn't that wise at age 19 but I like to think I was. ;)

In any event, the bottom line is that, yes, romantic love is wonderful and should be celebrated, but there are plenty of folks without it and they are worthy of love and kindness as well. And if you cannot give them romantic love you can give to them of your time, your attention, your ideas if they want them or just your presence. Shakespeare wrote (Marc Antony's funeral speech in _Julius_Caesar_): "Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your ears!"

I say unto you:

"Friends, Sparkers, Fellow Health Nuts and Health Nuts in Training, loan out your ears!"

February 14th is a day to celebrate romantic love. Let's make every other day a day to celebrate friendship. So loan out your ears, your hugs, your time and your attention.

And I bet you'll get 'em all back.

With interest.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JESPAH 2/18/2009 10:03AM

    Thanks, Paula. Made me smile this morning. :-D

Report Inappropriate Comment
PAULA3420 2/17/2009 8:51PM

    emoticon emoticon Terrific! YOU GOT MY EARS!! Very well thought out and we can all use an ear and a hug on just any old day. You have inspired me to be more sensitive. I'm hoping it spreads through the Sparks like wildfire. emoticon Paula emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 2/17/2009 6:28AM

    Mine's still sick, poor dude. Perhaps next weekend. Hmm.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EMMASMART 2/16/2009 11:26PM

    My husband objects to Valentine's Day. Today he's affectionate, there is no predicting him.

Emma

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHININGTHRU126 2/16/2009 11:56AM

    so true, so true...

Report Inappropriate Comment


I Took a Wrong Turn and I Just Kept Going

Monday, February 09, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFO-N01wup0

I was recently thinking about this song, and in particular the line I've chosen for the title of this entry, because I was contacted by someone I had not heard from in perhaps two decades. This was someone I had been very close to at that time.

And I had thought: Should I tell them of my weight struggles? Okay, that was a yes. But then -- should I tell them just how bad it had gotten, just how much I had let myself go? After all, the feelings that I had had were flooding back, unbidden, and it would have been easy to have simply "forgotten" about that episode in my existence. Forget it and it goes away, right?

But I made the decision to reveal all. And so I posted photos of myself on Facebook, all of the photos from my weight loss journey. Starting with this one: (if the photo doesn't show up for some reason, it's in my gallery; it's the group shot)

Now, I have to tell you, I love that photo. I really do! Unless I had been naked, I don't think there's any way I could have possibly looked worse. And so that photo says, "Get off your duff. You're digging your grave with your fork. Get into shape before I have to come over there and kick your keister."

I revealed.

This person said the photos were great but then got busy and disappeared. If the contact has ended due to other reasons, then sobeit. If the contact is on hold (if this person really is busy) then again, whatever. But if the contact ended because of that photo? Well, all I've gotta say is, that's fine, too.

It is. Because without the acid test, if the acid test isn't passed, you don't know what else will happen. This is what I am, or at least what I was. I share DNA with the person in that photo. And not just a little DNA, ALL of the DNA. I am her. She is me. Like me now, like me then, like me last week, like me a quarter of a century ago. We're all the same person.

The line right before the one in the title is:

"Like a river that don't know where it's flowing"

Well, I am no river. I am no mindless collection of detritus and water. I am a human being. I am a member of the most intelligent species this planet has ever known. And things don't just happen to me.

Consider it like a road trip. After all, we talk about weight loss as being a journey and this is no exception.

So what happens when you really do take a wrong turn and just keep going?
You don't take a map
Or you take a map and don't consult it
You don't read the road signs
You don't pull over and ask for directions
You ignore all warnings, clues and hints
You may even deliberately go left rather than right, East rather than West

And all of these are, ultimately, your own responsibility. You're the one who turned the key in the ignition. You adjusted the mirrors. You put it in gear. You turned the wheel. And you went the wrong way.

You can take that wrong turn, and that happens, but it is up to you to turn the wheel back to the correct direction and get back on course. You are the one who did it. And you can get out of it.

Because the opposite is true as well.
You can consult the map.
You can read the road signs.
You can ask for directions.
You can figure out how to correct your errors and get back on course.

You have that positive power, too, just as much as you have the responsibility for going the wrong way in the first place.

And so I decided to show the photograph. Because I am the one who watches my portions. And I am the one who takes alli. And I am the one who goes to a gym. And I am the one who makes good choices. And I am the one who looks for fitness opportunities. And I am the one who diaries my food and measures it.

And I am also the one who ate too much. I am the one who didn't exercise much. I am the one who didn't care about portions. I am the one who ate junk. I am the one who lost the thread of health. That's me, too.

If you only like the current part, the one who does the measuring, etc., then you've missed out on the other piece. That other part, the one going the wrong way? That one deserved to be liked and loved and cared for and listened to and celebrated. That part was a person, not a river, too.

You are responsible for your failures and your successes, your ups and your downs. You are responsible when the scale goes up or down or doesn't change. You are the one. Not me, not Elvis. YOU.

And you are not a river.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JESPAH 2/16/2009 10:54AM

    When it was Xmas, one of the songs I posted was Joni Mitchell's "I Wish I Had a River". :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
LAB-LOVER 2/16/2009 8:12AM

    This is an amazing blog -- I think all of us have taken a wrong turn at some point, but now we've found our way. I had to chuckle at the river analogy, because my FAVORITE quote -- it's on my sparkpage -- is from a singer/songwriter named Adrienne Young.
She sings:
"I am a river, forever changing... struggle is perfect and all that is here is for good."

The point being that we're constantly adapting, changing, growing... and that wherever we are in our journey... however imperfect it might be... it's ALL good." I tend to be a perfectionist, impatient with myself, hard on myself and the lyrics of that long are a good reminder for me to accept where I am at any given point. Hmmm... perhaps you've given ME something to blog about...

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 2/11/2009 3:34PM

    Thank you. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARIE4950 2/11/2009 1:42AM

    Thanks for sharing. You are a beautiful person inside and out.
Your friend Marie emoticon

Comment edited on: 2/11/2009 1:43:05 AM

Report Inappropriate Comment
JURI62 2/9/2009 10:37PM

    Thank you for your sharing, I've always been directionally challenged and
I love this analogy

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 2/9/2009 6:36PM

    Thank you all for your kind words. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
TINATC26 2/9/2009 12:26PM

    Oh, you are so right...you are no more or less worthy of the love and attention of other people because of what you may eat or not eat, do or not do, or what you look like. The world is full of people who like to play judge, and I find that most of those judges would not stand up to their own scrutiny all that well.

You keep up the good work and move forward on this journey. I think of it as the journey of life, not a weight loss journey, because what we are doing as we lose the weight certainly should not stop once we have lost the weight..eating healthy, exercising, it's a way of life, not a temporay state of being..

Thanks for this, I love reading words that reinforce the importance of what we do, and you have crystallized it in this blog.. Have a great day!!

Tina

Report Inappropriate Comment
FIT_TERI 2/9/2009 10:10AM

    I loved this -- it doesn't hurt that I am a Jersey girl and, therefore, a Springsteen fan.
emoticon

"I am her. She is me." You've done such an excellent job in changing your own course, yet you aren't ignoring the past - a time when maybe you weren't making decisions as well as you're making them now. It is you now, it was you then. The same, yet different. Your words are a reminder, at least to me, that it's up to me to consult the map, ask for directions, look for signs that the road I'm on is the one I mean to be on.

You've had and are having such great success, and I am confident that with all your hard work you will achieve your goals. And on top of that, I think you're a great writer!

Teri

Report Inappropriate Comment
TASOGAREBAN 2/9/2009 8:48AM

    Thank you. For your blog entry. I read it just to poke around and it was very insightful. And so very true to the heart. So thank you. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment


Give the Past a Slip

Monday, February 02, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxH39QlRuhg

I started this whole weight loss journey (heh, exercise) as a New Year's Resolution. And, so far, so good.

Now, keep in mind, it was actually last year's resolution. I've been doing this for a while.

But this was an odd January. Last year, I was in rapid weight loss mode, the kind of thing that happens when you first start a diet/lifestyle change. You're drinking water. You're moving your body. You're making better choices. Lots of people get a good, happy kick start that way and I was no exception. I dropped something like 16 lbs. that first month. Of course that never lasts but it was a good, happy start and it encouraged me to do more.

This year, naturally, is different. I did not and do not expect such a huge honkin' weight loss this time around. However, eek, I've gained. For two weeks in a row.

For some folks, this would be a cause for panic. For others, it would be a way to get out of the whole thing entirely. Oh, it's hopeless. It's all over. This'll never work. Yadda yadda yadda you all know what I'm talking about. Heck, I was in that bucket for a really long time. It is not a very nice bucket to be in.

This year, this month, I decided to greet a two week in a row gain with a mixture of a shrug and renewed determination. Those make odd bedfellows, but hear (read) me out.

The shrug is, well, it's minimal. It's something like a pound and a half in all. And the previous week I had lost three and a half pounds. Hence I'm still running at a deficit anyway. Plus, let's face it, people on maintenance go up and down all the time, and they are not ready to go out and commit hara kiri over it. Gains happen. Losses happen. Somethings, many times, they relate to choices we make. Sometimes they don't. This is not a linear progression. That is a fact that, I know, can be maddening. So I've decided to shrug. It came on. It'll come off. It's probably gone already.

The renewed determination is to (a) watch the intake better and (b) step up the exercise. Both of these things were planned already, which is kinda where the intersection with the shrug happens. I was going to do this anyway, whether I gained a pound and a half or lost that same amount of weight, or some other amount. These ideas, these goals, these aspirations, they were not tied to a scale. The scale is not an albatross hanging around my ship. It is not a millstone around my neck. It is a tool. It said one thing today. It'll say something else tomorrow.

Oh -- that stepping up? It is, as in, I've burned over 1,000 more calories today than I was planning to. Does this mean that portion control says sayonara? Does this mean that I can be careless? Of course not. I want to take advantage of the extra effort, not undermine it. So the portions remain the same, and the menu is what it was this morning before I started working out. Because it is not tied to the scale, either.

How's it going? Eh. Pretty good, pretty less than good, pretty in between, but none of that matters because I am going to do this anyway, no matter what that scale says. Because it is not the boss of me. I will whip myself into shape and I don't need a number on a scale in order to do that.

These shrugs are mighty powerful things.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PRINCESS4CHRIST 2/4/2009 6:05PM

    I love your attitude. I have given up so many times because the scale doesn't say what I want it to, and I need to learn to have an attitude more like yours.

Shandy

Report Inappropriate Comment
KUNGFOOD 2/4/2009 8:49AM

    emoticon
Great Post! It's refreshing to read an experience that isn't obsessing over every ounce.
emoticon
And yah! Way to keep on it, Jes! Nice work!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 2/3/2009 5:32AM

    Thank you all.

You're right, I could be hitting starvation mode and not even realizing it. Weird. I think we all want to believe it's this linear calories in, calories out kind of thing, but it's not, and that makes it easy for anyone to get tripped up.

I have noticed in the past that when I step up exercise, I tend to gain. I exercise anyway. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
TELERIE 2/3/2009 1:47AM

    I love your blogs, my friend. I'm on a roller coaster ride as well, one day it's up, another down. I don't let it worry me since the _trend_ is weight loss, and I think greeting the changes with a shrug and a strong will is just the thing to do. Have a plan, follow it, have a fall back plan when things go belly-up and just keep on keeping on.
It's important to fuel your machine, so when you step up the exercise and burn more calories, have a look at how many calories you give your body, so you don't go into starvation mode.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRECECOOKS 2/2/2009 8:26PM

    You have absolutely the right attitude. Those shrugs will keep you going, too.

Report Inappropriate Comment
AQUAGIRL08 2/2/2009 7:55PM

    You have a really healthy attitude! I could take a leaf out of your book! I agree that since this isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle change just staying on track will get us where we want to go. Good luck on your journey!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CRYSTALLEAH 2/2/2009 7:06PM

  Good for you for not letting a gain get you down. You have the right attitude and plan to get things moving again! Good luck with sticking to the plan. OH and remember if we exercise WAY more then you said you would you should probably be eating a little more or at least at the high end of the calories for the day.

Report Inappropriate Comment


With a Purposeful Grimace and a Terrible Sound

Monday, January 26, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6rDWqjnW7w

Everybody has a monster. You do. I do. The Queen of England does.

It's greed. It's hunger. It's pushing. It's nagging. It's want. It's laziness. It's smoking. It's drinking. It's gambling. It's overeating.

It is -- the monster within. The id, I suppose.

You know what I mean. It's the part that tells you that the one thing you want in life is a cookie. And another. And another. And another. It's the part that tells you to light up, to blow your money on things you don't need, to get hammered.

It has a loud voice. It's insistent. Heck, it's pushy. It wants. It needs. It craves.

Now now now
Gimme gimme gimme
More more more
Now now now

I listened to mine for a really long time. It told me to grab that bag of chips, and not stop until the bag was empty. It told me to roll over and go back to bed and not bother exercising. It told me to stay within myself and not go for what I wanted.

Because, you see, the monster isn't just the id. It's reticence and sorrow and depression and guilt and low self-esteem and unrealistic expectations. It's everything that keeps what you really, really want for yourself just beyond the blue horizon. It's what holds it all at arm's length. At bay, perhaps. But it keeps it away from you. And we all have let it, haven't we? We've let the monster win. We've given it what it wanted. And you know something? The monster wasn't satisfied. It didn't go away. It didn't get any smaller. It got worse. It got more demanding. It got larger. It took over more and more and more because it really wants everything. It wants all of you. It is a terrorist, holding your soul hostage.

Well I say, no more negotiating with this terrorist. It's time to put the monster in its place.

The monster, well, you can't kill it. It does not end, this does not end, ever. If it did, I suppose we wouldn't be here and there wouldn't be a Spark, because we'd all slay the dragon in some fashion or another and the monster would be gone and maybe we would need a little help to lift up the sword but then, in one fell swoop, it would all be done.

But that's not how it works.

The monster never dies. It never truly goes away. You know how people who have quit smoking can sometimes say that they still think of cigarettes, even years later, even when they know that it's bad for them? And how if they have one, it's as if they never stopped? You know how you can be maintaining, and fine, and you backslide, and suddenly you're falling down a slippery slope into an abyss and you just can't get out of it? Yeah, it's that monster again. It never really died. It was just hiding, and waiting.

I say, go out and meet it. Face it head on. Open up the closet door and look your fears and dashed hopes and desires and foibles and mistakes and imperfections in the face. They aren't going away, so embrace them. They may turn out not to be so bad after all.

About 20,000 or so years ago, humans knew of a monster. It was near their campsites and ate a lot of their garbage. It was a scary thing. But its babies weren't so scary, and some of the adults weren't too bad, either, and humans saw that this monster might be okay to have around, and might be useful. So they interbred the monster and it got a lot less scary. And it turned from a wolf -- the monster -- into a dog.

So take your id, your fears, your esteem issues, your hunger, your hesitation, take all of those things that push you away from what you want and where you want to be, and put a collar on them. Domesticate them. Eat first, then give the monster a few scraps. If the monster wants a cigarette, give it a stick of gum instead. Does the monster want you to gamble, but you don't want to, or your budget won't allow it? Tell it no, or later, or not now or you can only have a little.

Embrace your inner monster. Mine is the hungry beast. My friend's wants to smoke. What does yours want to do? And, more importantly, how can you serve yourself first, before it, and then throw it a small bone?

We have met the monster and the monster is us.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JESPAH 2/4/2009 9:21AM

    Thank you. I'm gonna make my monster shovel snow today. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
KUNGFOOD 2/4/2009 8:51AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
VEEJAY3 1/30/2009 4:54PM

    FABulous analogy, Jespah!!! Wow. Thanks for that idea. I know it will come to mind at very useful times. Such as when my monster says "but almonds are GOOD for you! Let's have the whole can!"

I'll just say "Heel!"

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CAPECODDIN 1/28/2009 8:54AM

    Great post!! It really hit home... I guess I have lots of monsters.. and one of them is depression and I can't get out of this rut, and every day something happens to sabotage my healthy eating plan.......... today I fell right down on my face in the parking lot... where is my mind... it's anyone's guess...

Report Inappropriate Comment
LAB-LOVER 1/27/2009 7:31PM

    I liked this blog SO much, I told everyone to go read it on my page!



Report Inappropriate Comment
ALLIEDRAGONFLY 1/27/2009 8:52AM

    My monster is under the bed; so insidious and so sly...
No matter where I go, it follows...to the next town or around the world.

You remind me of a saying the Twelve-Steppers have about "the monkey on my back: he never leaves, he only sleeps...waiting to be wakened."

Allie

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 1/27/2009 6:29AM

    Oh, I'm so glad you liked it. :)

I was inspired because I saw my friend and he's still smoke-free. And that's as hard as this is. We agreed it gets easier over time but it's still a bear -- a monster. Hence the inspiration.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TELERIE 1/27/2009 1:48AM

    I love this blog! I'm gonna read and re-read this one again and again - thanks for writing about the monsters so well!!
Mine is the one saying "It's no use, just give up, just settle for less..."

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRUE_TEXAN 1/26/2009 8:55PM

    My monster is an insecure little girl ... they are not always scary looking they fool you sometimes. But it's a monster regardless. Thanks for writing such a great blog- TT

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOGSNHORSES 1/26/2009 7:50PM

    loved this post-- very true.

Report Inappropriate Comment
QUEENDIDO 1/26/2009 7:06PM

    Great post! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


No Matter What We Get Out of This

Monday, January 19, 2009

www.youtube.com/watch?v=kG47FWl94yQ

A year ago today, I started taking alli.

I had been exercising for about three weeks. I had been watching portions for 10 days. But it was the 19th that I took the plunge with alli. I have never gone back. It has changed my life.

Weights and Measures

When I first started, I weighed 346 lbs. This morning, I weighed 221.6. I have lost 124.4 lbs.

My bicep was 19" around. It's now 14". My bust was 54.75". This morning it hit a personal best of 42.5". The band (where the bra band goes) was 47.5". This morning it was a personal best of 36". My waist started off at 49". This morning, another personal best: 37". My belly began at 59.5". This morning it was 41.25". My hips started off at 51". This morning they hit a personal best of 44". My big ole butt was 64" and I needed a specific tape measure to go beyond 5 feet. This morning, it was 49.25". My thigh started off at 32.25". This morning it was 23". I did not start off measuring my neck but I think it was about 19". This morning it was 15.5"

Overall loss was 90" (yes, really!), averaging 11.25" for all 8 measurements. When the outlyers (bicep and thigh) are removed from consideration, overall loss is 77.75", averaging 12.96" for those 6 measurements.

Exercise

I'm doin' it. I lift every morning and do resistance bands. I walk to work every day (from public transportation). I go to a gym twice a week. For today, when I'm neither working nor going to the gym, I'll shovel snow. I've also done indoor cardio by painting, doing housework and watching Leslie Sansone. We have an exercise bike but it's on its last legs (wheels?). Perhaps we'll get a new one. We also painted the exercise room and are in the middle of refurnishing/redecorating it. Already it's cheerier in there.

Food

I eat what I make, and I make different things. The slow cooker is my best friend. This week I'm going to try my hand at jambalaya (frankly, with a different spice ratio, it could be bouilliabaise). Last week we had chicken soup with matzoh balls. The week before we had bean soup. The week prior to that was whole wheat pasta with homemade sauce. These dinners work great over the Winter. In the Summer, I make the bean soup with less water and it becomes simply cooked beans. Grab a tortilla and you're good to go. Pasta also works for the Summer. I don't think I'll make the chicken soup but may adapt the jambalaya and make it less soupy. Experimentation is key, plus it's fun.

Attitude and Mood

It wavers. I'm no angel. It's not perfect. But it's pretty good for much of the time. Exercise is a mood lifter. I don't get runner's highs but I do feel better accomplishing a workout, and when I can get out in the sun, even in dim sunlight, that helps as well. Eating what I make is also fun and I like being productive. My husband and I still go out to eat but it's only once per week. And now it's a special treat, so it has more meaning. We eat better food at better places.

Influencing Others

On Spark I'm considered a Motivator. Huh? Um, okay, if reading my rants is motivating, heh, go for it. :)

But at work! This has proven interesting. I changed jobs in about May of last year and had by that time lost maybe 50 lbs. Hence I was already showing differences, already down a size and my face was less round. I was physically prepared to be able to walk as much as I do for commuting and, in fact, choosing this particular office was in a small part influenced by my being able to walk. Now I have lost another 74, almost 75, and the people in my office are really noticing it.

The other day, a DBA (Database Administrator) came up to me and told me it was very inspiring. Two other folk in the IT department have asked me what I eat. Another asked me what my workouts are like. Yet another is in the NY office and hasn't seen me in months. He asks about my progress and wonders if he'll recognize me when he next sees me.

Friends from camp tell me they're inspired to go on Weight Watchers because of me. My boss started taking alli. My mother watches more. Heck, anyone eating a meal with me tends to watch more. I don't ask them to. I just sit there and eat my portion and drink my water and they put back that second piece of meat or that third helping of potatoes.

Sizes and Fitting In

When I started, I wore a 26 or 3x up top and it was getting tight. Down below, I wore a 4x and it had to be stretchy. Now I wear a 16 or 18 up top and 18 below. XL works for me. I fit into my husband's size M tee shirts sometimes. My boots now can be zipped all the way up because my calves are smaller. My wedding ring no longer fits on my ring finger and has to be worn on my middle finger. When I started, it was cutting off the circulation on my ring finger. Necklaces fit around my neck again. I recently replaced my long underwear bottoms because they were size 3x and falling off me. Now I'm wearing XLs.

I also was having trouble fitting into the seatbelt of my car. Now I click it without thinking. I could not fit into the seats at the auditorium of my old office. I had trouble fitting into the seats at Fenway Park. I was afraid I would crack a toilet. I had trouble reaching around and behind (you know what I'm saying). Those problems have now all gone away. Little things like that, they're easy to take for granted. But when you lose weight, remember them. Because they are the worst things, nonhealthwise, about being grossly obese. Remember them and vow to never be that way again.

The Future

I still have a ways to go. My ultimate goal is to lose 200 lbs. This puts me 8 lbs. under the max for healthy BMI so I'll have some room to play with. So it's 75.6 lbs. from now. Late Summer, early Autumn, I'm guessing.

In the meantime, I'm here and I'm exercising and eating right and taking alli. And I'm talking to all of you, if you'll listen. We can all do this. It's not easy but it is oh so worth it.

Oh -- the song -- it's because I saw my friend on Saturday. He told me it was his fourth day smoke-free. I hope today is his sixth, and tomorrow is his seventh, etc. That's as hard as this. We don't even think about it sometimes, but people who seem to be wholly together sometimes aren't. I suspect they're never wholly together, and we're all duct taped and juryrigged in some way or another.

So do this, but also remember:

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
- Philo

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KUNGFOOD 1/23/2009 5:26AM

    How good it is to read this good news! Very happy for you and for recognizing those accomplishments. Yes, you are a motivator to me!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 1/21/2009 11:46AM

    Thanks, dolling! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
EMMASMART 1/20/2009 10:07PM

    I guess I've made a tad bit of progress. I don't break the toilet anymore, Just the seats. I imagine not having to worry about breaking Toilets and furniture would be very much a relief. I am looking forward to following you eventually. I'm inching closer. I have some looseness in one pair of pants. I look forward to having a DBA chat me up too. What a great bit of progress that you've made in a year. I'm so glad that alli is such a Godsend to you.

How wonderful. Really.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 1/20/2009 6:13AM

    Thank you both, very much. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
RUSSELLORAMA 1/20/2009 2:16AM

    Congrats on your progress! You are definitely motivating to me.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KARBIE18 1/19/2009 1:27PM

    You are doing so well, and you ARE a motivator. To many of us. Keep it up!

Karen

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESPAH 1/19/2009 12:37PM

    It's funny -- my pal the DBA was, ahem, looking me up and down when he said what he said. This is a dude who has winked at me before. And my husband has said that about the only guy he's not worried about is the fishmonger, as the fish dude is a good 15 - 20 years younger than me and many of our conversations center around his fiancée. Tee hee hee I had forgotten what it's like to be a nascent hot tamale.

And YOU! You must be turning heads, babe! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
TELERIE 1/19/2009 11:54AM

    I love these summing up blogs of yours! You've come a long way! You're going far!
So have I and so am I!
It's not easy. It's not as hard as I imagined either.
How cool is it that you're motivating your colleagues! Spread the Spark!

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 Last Page