I have been going through this struggle which is totally frustrating me
I have been working through a few injuries which doesn't help but I have got to stop using that as an excuse. I know what I have to do but I can't seem to make myself do everything I have to at one time or for any period of time. I have been following the Weight Watchers points program and for me it has totally worked when I work the program, my problem is I don't seem to want to work the program. I tell myself all day I shouldn't eat this, or I should track that, I should do some kind of exercise but I don't have the motivation to actually do whatever is I am thinking I should or shouldn't do. Every so often I have a spurt of motivation but I can't seem to get it to stick around. I make a goal for myself if I set a date to make this goal by it TOTALLY backfires on me and I won't get to the goal by the deadline
Another one of my problems is cravings, I seem to go through cycles where I will crave chocolate bars and then it will be carbs and then it will be veggies and then I will seem to not have any. I need to figure out substitutions. Right now I am struggling through a carb craving. I try to not give in like with the carbs I find myself wanting chips so I will try to substitute something crunchy like carrot sticks but it doesn't work I want the chips. So I will go and count out the chips for a serving, sometimes I will track them but I used to track everything and it was so second nature so what happened to break that I have NO CLUE! Today I wanted a tottsie roll...I walked right by them when I stopped at the gas station and totally forgot when I was in the checkout of my local Walmart which makes me think it really isn't a craving.
I just don't understand why my mind or body or whatever it is wants me to slide backwards! I have lost 75lbs (3x) it has taken me sooo long I think I am getting frustrated and bored. The fact that I have done this for so long actually impresses me because I have NEVER stuck to something for so long. Today is a "I want to give up" day but yet I don't I went to Walmart so I can get stuff to make salads for lunch the next few days. I don't want to be hurt anymore and if I gain weight it won't help my knee injury for sure!
I wish I had the money to have someone cook for me and cook healthy! If I had the money I would also hire a personal trainer so I would be accountable for my workouts and a trainer would be able to get me off any plateau I may reach. I have even thought about going to a psychiatrist to see what the heck is wrong with my head, why do I want to sabotage my success.
If anyone has any ideas I am so open to them! The "Just Do It" and the "telling myself I have to" just isn't working at the moment and I don't know how to change it. I know how I feel when I am doing good but even that is not motivation right now.
I am truly frustrated right now!
OK so Christmas is not my favorite holiday, but that doesn't mean I am a scrooge. I will admit before my niece and nephew came into the picture I didn't really care if Christmas came, yea I got gifts but they weren't always what I wanted...to many practical things and I hated it! I like fun stuff or money in my stocking not socks and a tooth brush! My mother playing Christmas tunes from my birthday through January who wouldn't want to take the tree down after Epiphany and Russian Christmas were over didn't help either. I do believe that anything Christmas before Thanksgiving is rushing things! One holiday at a time people!!!!! How the Grinch stole Christmas is my all time favorite holiday special! I don't like the movie at all! I will have my Bah Humbug sign hanging in my cubicle come Monday but even the Grinch and Scrooge came around by Christmas :) I am actually looking forward to Christmas this year even bought my first Christmas present already! I am normally the last minute shopper but because money is so tight I will have to spread it out over the next few weeks.
I was actually in a pretty good mood all day today...yea I had my blood pressure rise a few times but it didn't affect my mood any :) to top it off I had another loss on the scale! I need to keep plugging along so I need to behave on Thursday! I am putting together a tossed salad so I will be able to munch on that instead of the fattening sides I am also going to have veggies and dip along with the cheese and pepperoni and crackers so I will still have something to munch on. I also just found out that my gym will be open thursday morning so I may just go before we eat :)
ok so I have set a goal for myself but I am afraid to say anything because every time I say "I want to lose x amount of weight by x date" I mess it up in some way, shape or form! So instead of saying I want to lose 25lbs in 10 weeks which is what I really want I am going to say I want to lose 15-25 in 10 weeks...even with Thanksgiving and Christmas in there! My down fall around Christmas are the cookies! and the chocolate! I have a friend that will be getting her spin certification on Jan 25th and the following week she is supposed to start teaching at a gym not too far from my home. I probably wont see her until then soooo I want to lose 100 lbs by the time I see her again When I hit 100lbs I will have lost 2.5 lbs every week from now until then...in the beginning of this weight loss journey that would have been a breeze but now that I have been fluctuating between 70-80lbs lost it's going to be a little harder.
this past Friday was my 41st birthday. I started my long weekend with a Spin class on Thursday night. Should have gone to the gym on Friday but I didn't Went out to dinner yummy passed on dessert and didn't go to the bar and have a birthday drink either Saturday went to spin class in the morning went out to lunch with my mom and grandmother like every Saturday then went out for pizza and bowling with friends. Instead of soda with my cheese pizza I had water...that was a first usually I can't do water with my meals. Sunday went back to the gym but not my usual 2+ hours. today I went back to the gym and rode the bike for 45 minutes and then had pb&j's with my niece and nephew and played with them for a few hours! Then I came home helped the hubby with the leaves before it got dark and then went out to eat with my family for my brother's and my birthdays...had dessert tonight but I split it with the hubby and my nephew weigh in tomorrow should be interesting hoping it isnt a gain, fingers crossed.
this year I had a good birthday weekend!