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JENNSWIMS's Recent Blog Entries

I Just Published a Recipe... Woohoo.

Monday, May 02, 2011

Jenn's Low Fat Vegan Bean and "Ham"... basically I threw together a soup yesterday and in the process of entering all the data it seemed just as easy to enter the recipe and share it.

Lemme know what you think, if you try it. :)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TIGSCHEF1 5/2/2011 6:45PM

  Thanks 55Walker for letting us know where to find the recipe. I'm still having trouble figuring out how to navigate in "Spark-Land". Jenn, both recipes look good. I'll have to try them this weekend.

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55WALKER 5/2/2011 5:02PM

    Click on Jenn's "favorites" on her main page to find the recipe.
Sounds yummy.

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OVERHAULING-ME 5/2/2011 2:37PM

    Ooohhhh, thanks for posting! I AM going to try it!

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IF I Grow Up, I Want To Be Just Like This Woman

Monday, May 02, 2011

I'm so freaking impressed with this woman, makes me proud to be a nurse... and makes me want to be doing triathlons too!

From The St. Petersburgh Times (

Teresa McCoy, 37, was just about to finish the bike portion of the Meek and Mighty Triathlon, part of the annual St. Anthony's Triathlon events, when she saw two police officers huddled over a fellow rider along Bayshore Drive.

McCoy, a nurse at Tampa General Hospital's cardiac lab, steered her bike to where the man was down. The officers thought the man might be having a seizure, but McCoy checked for a pulse. "I didn't feel one at all," she said. "He wasn't looking good."

McCoy began CPR, then yelled for someone to find a defibrillator. One of the officers had one in his trunk.

"As soon as we shocked him, he came to," McCoy said.

IT GETS BETTER.... This woman is a rock star!

As paramedics arrived and loaded the man into an ambulance, McCoy got back on her bike and finished the race.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PURPLE180 5/2/2011 3:18PM

    emoticon. What a wonderful person she is. :-)

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HANKENSTEIN 5/2/2011 3:17PM

    Wonderful of you to share. Very inspiring stuff.

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    Very Cool!!!

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SUSANMOMOF6 5/2/2011 3:12PM

    Wow. I wonder if her picture is in the dictionary under "role model"? Thanks for sharing!


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OVERHAULING-ME 5/2/2011 2:39PM

    AMAZING and VERY Impressive!

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HEATHHILL 5/2/2011 12:43PM


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THOMS1 5/2/2011 10:55AM


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GOLOPTIOUS 5/2/2011 10:39AM

    Wow! I think I'd use "saving someone's life" as an excuse to go home and take a nap. She is a rock star!

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SARACSJ 5/2/2011 10:24AM

    What a great story. So glad I found this today.

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VBPARROTHEAD 5/2/2011 10:21AM

  Awesome! Love to read things like this!

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BANJO_13 5/2/2011 10:14AM

    really cool

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TJHIERS 5/2/2011 10:08AM

    seems like she is on the job everywhere she goes....

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TERESAJOC 5/2/2011 9:52AM


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FCARMICH 5/2/2011 9:48AM


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May Goals, Throwing Ice Cream Away, Must Do Better

Sunday, May 01, 2011

So we went to brunch today, as has been our habit for the past few weeks. We go to this place called the Northstar Cafe, which is known for being all granola-ey and healthy and organic and all the buzzwords that make me spend my hard earned money. Eggs laid by chickens that were massaged by geisha while listening to Liberace CDs blah blah blah. It is fantastic. I get food glow from this place. Usually, I have half of burrito sub tofu for egg and cheese. Today, I tried the veggie burger. Num. The bread it came on isn't worth it, but it was quite tasteylicious.

Northstar Cafe:

Unfortunately, it sits right next to Jeni's Ice Cream. Now this place isn't your normal Baskin Robbins kind of joint, this place is famous across the country for the insanity that is the flavor profile of this cream based crack. Dean and Deluca even carries it. It's the kind of place that makes foodies shiver and shake with anticipation. My husband got some, my friend got some, and dammit, I got a scoop too. I got the pepitas and olive oil ice cream in a waffle cone.

Send an addictive 9 pint pack to someone you don't like today:

The bad: ice cream is NOT on my plan. The good: I threw that tasty poison away without eating half of one of the two scoops. I was disgusted with myself and just couldn't justify it. That shit is so not on my plan that I can't even see it from my plan. Organic heavy cream my left butt cheek, I don't care, it may taste like happy tears from cherubim and it still isn't worth it.

Me, after getting mad at myself and throwing away the devil's ice cream. 293.8 today. Such an astonishingly unflattering photo, but probably more accurate than I would like. Note the lack of a smiley.

On a more positive note, the jeans that I couldn't get the zipper to come within two inches of meeting at the beginning of April actually zipped today. I looked like someone in the 1980's who had to use pliers and lay down on a bed to get into their Jordache jeans prior to going roller skating, but those bad boys zipped by god.

So all of that, the jeans, the ice cream, the post nasal drip that started as soon as I ate dairy :( that got me thinking about what I'm going to do better this month, and I can assure you that the rest of May will be ice cream free. I do need some goals though, so here we go.

May 2011 Goals:

*Eat in restaurants no more than twice a week (major issue for me).
*Lose a total of 40 pounds by the cruise (June 5th. Aim high I say, aim high).
*No processed foods whenever humanly possible. That means you, devil bread and satan tortillas.
*No more than one food with a label each day.
*Eat the one cup of beans per day that my plan prescribes.
*At least ten different fruits and vegetables in my daily diet. Eating across the rainbow and all that happy crap.
*Continue to support the newbies on the site by saying supportive things to first time bloggers. Aim for 10 per day, more when bored at the workplace.
*Exercise no less than 300 minutes per week.
*Pool no less than twice per week.
*Quit being a sissy and go to at least one swim team practice as a trial run by the end of May.
*The barely zipped jeans will be loose.
*My largest pants will be too large to wear and will have to be given away. Even the four new pairs, including the spiffy navy pinstriped ones.
*Work on my Paul McKenna steps (which seem deceptively simple, but none of us would be here if we did them each and every day) each and every day. They are as follows:

1. When you are hungry, eat.
2. Eat what you want (not what you think you "should".)
3. Eat consciously and enjoy every mouthful.
4. When you are full stop.

and last, but not least,
*no freaking excuses. Shut up and do it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DCAPDEVI 5/6/2011 7:46PM

    Thank you for setting the goal of supporting newbies. I am happy to be one of your newbies today :-) From reading around your page, I have gained insight, inspiration, found a common bond, and shed tears for the right reason. The past few days depression has been hitting. I read some of your blogs and laughed so hard I had to go get a tissue! Hugz!

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NOVELIC 5/1/2011 8:37PM

    Hi. I stumbled onto your blog today and I am right there with you wanting to make some solid progress in May. So here's to knowing what will make that happen. Cheers.

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SARA72121 5/1/2011 6:33PM

    Congratulations on the jeans!!

I feel your pain about the ice cream sista! There's this ice cream place by my house same as yours, nationally voted the best blah blah blah. Their ice cream is like heaven. It's called Sweet Republic. My husband wanted some on the way home the other night so I stopped in to get him a scoop. I did the unthinkable. I didn't get any! I asked for a sample of the banana's foster ice cream and that was enough.

Now on to the beans. I love beans. I used to hate them and I'm always looking for new recipes with beans. This one is my current favorite. Black bean chili with orange and cumin.
pe-detail.asp?recipe=1562924 It freezes really well so I always have a few servings in the freezer. The other one that I just adore is roasted chickpeas. I use the recipe off the of the food network's website, it's from the show "Good Eats."

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GOLOPTIOUS 5/1/2011 6:04PM

    Congrats on the jeans fitting! I know how exciting that must be!

I hear you about the ice cream. I love frozen treats - mostly popsicles and fudge bars and stuff. So I've made myself a compromise. Whenever I want one of my frozen treats, I make myself a frozen fruit smoothie. They are delicious and easy to make. Frozen fruits, some nonfat vanilla yogurt, and a little bit of water or else some 100% fruit or vegetable juice/puree and I can have pretty much any fruit flavor I want! It's healthy AND it helps me get more servings of fruits/veggies daily.

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176 Reasons to Lose 176 Pounds

Saturday, April 30, 2011

It just makes sense to me that I have a reason for each and every pound I lose on my way to my dream weight. Each individual pound is important, and considering how much work it is to drop some tonnage, I thought it was worth my time and energy to come up with a list.

So here it is, in all of its not politically correctness.

P.S. Please take this idea and run with it. Come up with your own list! Whether it is ten reasons long or two hundred, I think you will find this extremely motivating. If you do make a list, and you have a moment, tell me about it so I can read your list!

176 Reasons to Lose 176 Pounds

So I appreciate sweets as treats, not as an every day food

I hate Clomid, and my research indicates that if I lose 50 pounds or more I may not need it.

Size 10 clothes are far more stylish than 24s.

I want to be able to shop in all of the clothing stores, not just Lane Bryant.

I like feeling in control of what I consume.

The meat packing industry grosses me out. *Thank you Food, Inc.*

Plantar Fasciitis-aka my feet frackin' hurt!

Heel spurs--The little boney daggers that are making my feet hurt even more.

My skin is clearer when I am thinner

Having a pannus is horrible. Pannus=Dun Lop Disease=Gross overhang of my gut.

I want to run again, without fear of breaking myself or the treadmill.

To look good in a bathing suit. (I realize this may require plastic surgery to remove skin)

To make my husband proud

So being the published author of a weight loss surgery book doesn't seem like a sick joke. (I have not had surgery, my side gig is writing about surgery)

High cholesterol

My fasting blood glucose was 148 the day I started this journey. It is now 98. It still needs to be lower but I'm no longer prediabetic.

I like swimming, even though it requires me to wear that horrible thing called a swimsuit.

I'm too young to ache like I do.

So I can quit envying everyone else's beautiful baby. Or saying someone else's baby is beautiful when it really is a funny looking kid. Oh wait, I will still have to do that if I have my own.

When I fold my pants I am horrified by how huge they are. Seriously. I practically need bigger hangers.

When I eat better I feel better. Understatement of the century.

Rude comments and looks of disgust. (From people raised without manners)

I have nice legs when I'm thin.

I'm NOT big boned! I'm medium boned at best. I'm fat people. FAT. No bones about it.

I'm pretty under the fat. I'm not quasimodo right now, but I am much cuter when defatted.

Green poop is quite funny. At least it is if you are a 38 year old overgrown child.

Stinky skin folds and skin yeast. The constant battle of the powder, and drying, etc.

So I can swim around Liberty Island in NYC.

Smart and pretty is much more fun than smart, I remember what that was like.

I've always wanted to try yoga.

I'm putting running a 5k on my bucket list.

So if I don't get pregnant I will know I did everything possible and will quit beating myself up.

Fluevog boots will fit my calves and Fluevog boots are the sex bomb.

Organic and unprocessed tastes better.

So I quit spraining my ankles over and over.

So I don't feel trapped in my job, which is largely a desk job.

Double (triple?) chin.


I enjoy life too much to die young.

I want to grow old with my husband, so I can continue to irritate him for decades to come.

I want to be a spry old person. Hell, I want to be a spry 30 something.

To reverse the heart disease I probably have.

To never again fear an airplane seat or seatbelt.

I want to ride roller coasters again. Cedar Point, baybee!

So I'm not the fat one. Anywhere. Ever.

More energy and stamina.

Never break another chair.

Movie seats won't hurt anymore.

Clothes that are too big are lots more fun than ones that are too small.

I deserve better than a 311 pound body.

For the day when 4 mph seems slow.

One size fits all does not fit me.

So I don't have to say, "Do as I say, not as I do."

Adventure vacations.

To be significantly smaller than my husband.

Better sex.

Reverse cowgirl.

Girl on top!

Agent Provocateur lingerie. (I'm detecting a theme here)

So I can wear The Who concert tshirt I bought (seriously, they hadn't toured for 17 years, I HAD to get the shirt) knowing it wouldn't fit, because it was the largest size they had, hoping to one day fit into it.

In case I ever get to work on a LifeFlight helicopter, I will meet the weight requirements. They don't let fatties fly on those emergency medical choppers. 150 lb weight limit for most.

So going hiking in the Hocking Hills doesn't sound like work.

To get rid of my giant ass. Seriously, if it gets any bigger I will trigger seismographs.

Because boobs can be too big.

So shoveling snow doesn't give me a massive heart attack.

So I don't feel like I'm going to have heat stroke all summer long.

It is expensive to run central air all summer long.

Quitting smoking does not mean I must gain weight.

I'd like to ride a bike and not look like my ass ate the seat.

Wiping one's ass should not be the first challenge of the day.

I have features that are attractive other than my hair!

I work too hard to die too young to enjoy retirement.

So I quit loathing stairs.

So I am fit enough to use machines other than the bike and treadmill.

No food will make me feel the way weighing #135 does.

Never paying a surcharge for XXL clothing again.

Sexy bras instead of sturdy ones.

So getting my hair done doesn't seem like a waste of money, since the rest of me is so unsightly.

Because I wasn't always a frump.

To wear one of the cool Speedo suits in fun fabrics instead of the black ones they make for fatties.

So I am not an embarrassment to my future children.

We can show our friends how good organic food can be.

To avoid hip replacement, knee replacement, gall bladder and heart bypass surgeries.

Gastric bypass is not an option.

For the first (and the twentieth) time someone says, "Have you lost weight?"

So people don't recognize me since I've lost so much and become so small.

To regain the self esteem I once had.

People really do treat fat people differently.

So I have more job options while I'm working on my master's degree.

To encourage my husband in his journey to health.

So I can wear shorts instead of jeans in the summer.

So I can complete a sprint triathlon.

Because foodie doesn't have to mean fattie

I am proud of myself when I meet goals I set for myself.


So I actually look like I belong at the gym.

So I can quit wearing CPAP at night.

My stomach will keep shrinking!

So my dogs get more exercise, which they love.

I can give my entire wardrobe away and start fresh.

Underneath the fat I have an hourglass shape.

People judge fat people and believe they are fat and lazy.

So one person says, "you are thin enough, you should stop losing weight." After which I run to the bathroom and cackle maniacally.

Tiny, narrow bathroom stalls.

So I'm not the fattest person at work. I think I'm in a tie right now.

So people aren't surprised when I finish 5ks.

So I quit avoiding having my photo taken or hiding behind others when I have my photo taken.

So I'm not the fattest one in my family.

To be smaller than my senior year of high school.

So my risk of heart attack and stroke are nearly non-existent.

I can grow much of my own food.

Exercise is a great way to reduce stress, and I have lots of stress.

Cool 5k tshirts.

Earning an "Alcatraz Swim Team" tshirt.

To look better than I did 10 years ago.

Because it will help fix my ugly toenails.

All of the cool rewards I will buy myself for major milestones.

So I can write about weight loss without it seeming like a farce.

Because no one should ever be told the celebrity they most resemble is Camryn Manheim.

So I can wrap a towel around me that is smaller than a beach towel.

So I can justify buying more workout shirts with the super cool thumbholes. I have an unnatural amount of love for the super cool thumbholes.

So I can trust myself around tempting food and become far more selective about what is tempting.

So my thighs don't rub together until they are raw.

Not having to wear two jog bras to smash the girls flat to keep them from bouncing up and giving me a black eye.

Never wondering if I will fit in the booth at a restaurant.


So I can cross my legs easily and not look absurd.

Serious abs!

So I don't feel sorry for the other people in the row when I need to go to the bathroom during a movie and I have to wiggle past them.

So I can wear high heels without feeling like a Weeble.

It is time to stop having an internal monologue that is filled with hate and disappointment.

J. Crew, J. Jill, Ann Taylor, Dior and Chanel clothes. Not that I will buy them, but I COULD.

Walking into a dressing room feels like walking to a punishment.

To be happy to be weighed at the doctor's office.

So I can jump instead of little tiny hops.

So I quit thinking my husband was dumb for marrying someone as gross as me.

So I look lean, strong, powerful and curvy.

To get rid of my gut that is so big I don't have a lap.

So I quit sounding like a broken record, "I need to lose some weight".

Because my 20 year class reunion is in October.

To feel sexy!

To conquer food addictions. Thank you Dr. Fuhrman for Eat to Live and detoxing my body.

So I learn my trigger foods and how to avoid them.

For the first time that I've lost so much weight that my underwear falls off. Hopefully, this will be in the privacy of my own home.

So I can do a pull up, or maybe even two pull ups.

People respect you when you lose weight, not when you gain it.

The process of losing weight and getting fit is half the fun.

Trying pilates, yoga, kickboxing, boxing and racquetball classes.

So our bathtub doesn't seem too small to soak in.

No one takes advice from a morbidly obese nurse seriously, no matter how good it is.

So my husband can pick me up, throw me on the bed and ravish me without risking back surgery or death.

So socks quit leaving deep grooves in my ankles.

To make me read menus in a totally different way, looking for the healthiest thing available.

Because food is fuel and I need to view it more that way than as a treat.

So I can quit envying the people I see outside running and become one of them.

So that my thighs are muscular and strong, not bumpy and rippled with fat.

So my fingers and hands don't look all chubby and stubby.

So I can put photos of myself looking impossibly cute on Facebook.

Because it is hard to find XXL and XXXL gym clothes.

Not feeling the need to avoid mirrors like a vampire.

So I can be ankle behind my head flexible like I was years ago.

I can stop avoiding necklaces because they make my neck look fatter.

Working in the garden won't make me feel like I'm going to pass out.

Sleeveless shirts. Not that I will wear them, but I COULD if I wanted to.

Losing weight improves hirsutism, which may mean no longer having to have the 'stache waxed.

So oversized chairs feel oversized, not normal.

For the 176 times I will get on the scale and feel happy about my progress.

Because it feels good to get sweaty during a serious workout.

So I can wear those cute tights that the thin girls wear at the gym.

Short skirts.

Vacationing in warm places and locations with beaches.

To feel energized and ready to go when I wake up in the morning.

Never again saying, "maybe we can do that once I lose some weight."

To be "height-weight proportionate".

To qualify for life insurance.

Because there will never be a feeling like the one when I get on the scale and it says 135. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEESALLYRUN 9/17/2011 9:15AM

    Great list! emoticon

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LILLI56 9/14/2011 8:19PM

    I am so excited about your list that I am doing one of my own. I have alot, so it will be long.

I don't think the life flight have a weight limit here in Mississippi because I have 3 friends one a RN and the other two are RT and they all weigh over 150. One is way over 200. But maybe that is because TN and MS have the highest obese problem in the US. I will not be on that stat next year!!!!!!

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CHARMINGLUCKY 9/13/2011 7:01PM

  Jenn, I just joined your new Punxatawney Phil Pforty Team. Am working on my own 122 reasons! Finally found out that my saggy baggy old lady belly is called a pannus, I am shocked! I really want to start having pfun and feel pfabulous with the rest of the Phil team! emoticon

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TRICIAP0812 8/27/2011 2:32PM

    Very inspiring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ank you for sharing.


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JGILBERTMDY 8/8/2011 1:05PM

    Awesome list!!!! and your skin should nicely recover itself if you build muscle and lose fat, not lose muscle and retain fat. Starvation diets give us that wrinkly belly skin, not the Spark People way!!!

I'm off to make a list of all my reasons! emoticon

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LADYNEST 6/27/2011 8:07PM

    Thank you, thank you, thank you. This is just the thing I needed today.

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CACEYPARRISH85 6/13/2011 11:07PM

    i LOVE this.. i think everytime I think about giving up, i'll come back to this and read it over and over again, I can relate to a lot of things you listed. thanks for sharing :)

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LEIGHISME 6/10/2011 8:21PM

    Awesome list! Now I want to create my own. Thanks for the inspiration. emoticon

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RUE_19 6/10/2011 3:25PM

    I love this! Amazing reasons and totally motivating... i'm going to have to make my own

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BTLSMUM 6/10/2011 1:37PM

    What a great list!

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MSPEACHYJONES 6/10/2011 6:23AM

    Excellent blog really enjoyed it! Totally agreed on the cool thumb holes bit emoticon

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DOLCEVITA256 6/10/2011 12:33AM

    What an amazing idea! My favorite is "smart AND pretty" emoticon

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    I love your list! you've inspired me to start my own list cause sometimes I forget about the reasons and get sidetracked.
thanks for sharing

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LUCRETIUS 6/9/2011 9:43PM

    But Camryn Manheim is hot! Seriously, I love her.

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    Just to let you know, I heard weight training helps your skin rebound, so you may not have to get that surgery :)

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ABURCIAGA1 6/9/2011 6:15PM

    Jenn, I love your list and your honesty. I share many of the same reasons for wanting to lose weight. You can do it!

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SUMMER_FOR_LIFE 6/9/2011 3:55PM

  You have an incredible sense of humor, this list was both inspiring and heart warming. I wish you the best as you tackle each of the pounds and goals. Can't wait to hear more! emoticon

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    Such an amazing idea!!! I'm off to make my own list!

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KAITY_MAY09 6/9/2011 9:11AM

    I can agree with like 99% of your reasons. I am so going to make my own now. Thanks for the idea!

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MINEHEART 6/9/2011 4:43AM

  This really was an awesome idea, every day I find the reasons I dont want to face the world looking like I do. And now I have a whole new positive way of starting the day. I am going to start my own list, Thanks so much for sharing this idea emoticon

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SOL_SAPITO 6/8/2011 2:35PM

  This is pretty awesome!!! I'm inspired to create my list!!! Thanks for the tips!!

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MOM23GAL 6/8/2011 9:22AM

    I love this! I have lost 90 pounds and am trying to maintain it this time and I think that I will make my list of 90 reasons not to gain it back! And every time I gain a pound, I'll add another reason. Thanks for your inspiration!

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STEPHANIE1975CA 6/8/2011 9:09AM

  I am sitting at my desk thinking I can relate to every one of the items on your list! I was looking for motivation and I just found it! Hope you don't mind, but I am stealing some of your list and modifying it for me, LOL!

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BASBONBON 6/7/2011 8:27PM

    How cool. I'm going to start my 65 reasons to lose 65 pounds. Best of luck in your journey.

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CHESHRCAT 6/7/2011 2:37PM

    I love your blog! This post has inspired me to make my own list. I will be posting it soon.

Also, I wanted to give a shout out to a fellow Ohioan! I'm in Cincinnati. emoticon

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MAMASHAWN 6/7/2011 11:56AM

I so related to your list. I created my own a few years ago, but I need to add about four more reasons. They will include boots, maniacal laughter in the bathroom, and Thumbholes! There are thumbholes? I LOVE thumbholes!!

Here's my list, composed when my life was vastly different than it is now.
My reasons are still very much the same.

Go both of us!!!!

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METOO03820 6/7/2011 10:33AM

    Love your blog. I love that you have a sense of humor about all this, I think it's what keeps us all going. :D

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CINNAMONCAT9 6/6/2011 11:56PM

    Really really really WELL DONE! Loved it....I pray that you will find great health and have a lovely baby with a big gorgeous smile JUST like yours!

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DIVABUG 6/6/2011 7:51PM

  This was the most refreshing thing I have read in such a long nice to know we all have the same wants! You are a wonderful inspiration and I wish you ever success!

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LORENVER 6/6/2011 6:25PM

    That is fantastic! I think I might be inspired to make my own list!


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DIGITALJEDI 6/6/2011 1:51PM

    I want to hug you so hard.
You are my weightloss soul mate.


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AMY3BOYS 6/6/2011 8:57AM

  What an inspiration and what a great motivational tool!

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FAB_BY_45 6/5/2011 11:12PM

  I could relate to every one of them especially the one about people respect you when you lose weight than when you gain weight.

Off to make my own list of 110.

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COYOTESPEAKS 6/5/2011 7:03PM

  What a fantastic idea!

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JOCARAPACK 6/5/2011 9:45AM

  I totally relate. Especially 10 in more stylish than 24. emoticon

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JULIEPANN 6/5/2011 9:17AM

    This is really great! Thanks for the inspiration and the laughs! emoticon

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KLWMTSU 6/5/2011 12:49AM

    OMG! That was amazing. I wrote my own 60 reasons. I laughed histerically about the first challenge of the day shouldn't be wiping one's ass. I even giggle remembering it!! LOL. There were so many reasons that I can completely relate to!! I think it's wonderful that you shared them with us to help us inspire each other and have a giggle along the way!

emoticon emoticon

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BETHANY198325 6/3/2011 11:51AM

    This was AWESOME :) I just saw it today. I wrote my list yesterday, it was only 25 reasons, but we have a lot of them in common. Loved it!

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YOMAMA128 6/2/2011 1:03PM

    This is fantastic! I actually THREW BACK MY HEAD and LAUGHED out loud for several of these, including "So I can justify buying more workout shirts with the super cool thumbholes. I have an unnatural amount of love for the super cool thumbholes."

I'm with you on that one!!

You're a great writer. These are all excellent reasons to wave goodbye, one pound at a time. Thanks for posting the particularly harsh reasons, too. We are so hard on each other, and ourselves!

Let's commit to motivating ourselves with rewards, and turn the volume way, way down on our punishing voices. They may "mean well", but they just hurt - a lot - and get in the way. Rewards are best!

You've inspired me to blog my own list -- I'll let you know when it's posted!

Warmest thanks for all your blogs. Here's to slow and steady losses all around!


emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 6/2/2011 1:05:34 PM

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E27JUNEBUG 6/1/2011 10:42AM

    Amazing! You've inspired me to go make a list of my own, though it might take me a little bit to think up 100. Every one will be worth it though! emoticon

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CREATING_SARAH 6/1/2011 2:02AM

    Absolutely wonderful! This has inspired me not only to make my own list (143 reasons and I will be stealing a couple of yours cause you really hit the nail on the head) but to really delve into what is going to inspire me and keep me motivated so I look down and see #155.

Thank You

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JEANBAPTC 5/31/2011 8:41PM

    Love it! Love it! Love it!... I could identify with so many.... Great blog! emoticon

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TINASDUNWELL 5/31/2011 7:47PM

  Loved it! hehe. Thanks for sharing it.

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NINJA_SMOO 5/25/2011 1:51PM

  So many of your reasons resonated with me. Great list!

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TRACYZABELLE 5/22/2011 11:14AM


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MEAGANNAOMI 5/20/2011 8:20PM

    This list is soooo freaking awesome. I laughed and identified totally with pretty much every sentiment here.

My fave: "So my husband can pick me up, throw me on the bed and ravish me without risking back surgery or death."

Totally a goal for me too!!

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MELLYBEANS0919 5/20/2011 12:59AM

    What a great list!

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MAQQIE71 5/18/2011 2:02PM

    HILARIOUS! emoticon

* "I want to grow old with my husband, so I can continue to irritate him for decades to come." Ha ha ha!!! That's motivation for me, too!

* "I'm NOT big boned! I'm medium boned at best. I'm fat people. FAT. No bones about it." Amen! and we're going to CHANGE this about ourselves.

* "So our bathtub doesn't seem too small to soak in." I hate when my girls and belly float on top of the water.

And also a bit heart-wrenching.

* "So my thighs don't rub together until they are raw." Man, don't you HATE having to wear bike shorts under skirts? Muy attractive-o. emoticon

* "So I quit thinking my husband was dumb for marrying someone as gross as me." Sad -- but I've also thought this about my boyfriend. Why is he with ME?

* "It is time to stop having an internal monologue that is filled with hate and disappointment." emoticon I feel ya, oh Lawdie, I feel ya!

I have thought a lot of these, too. Thanks for sharing. I'll be re-reading many times. You made my day.

Comment edited on: 5/18/2011 2:19:02 PM

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DIENEBIENE 5/3/2011 5:33AM

    Thank you very much for the list. I could identify with so many points on your list. I am sure you will loose all the weight you plan to loose.
All the best from Germany Dinah

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BEACHGIRL76 5/1/2011 12:24PM

    Oh my gosh this was AWESOME! You should be a comedian. lol I was crackin' up! lol I feel the same way about so many you wrote down. I didn't know there was a weight limit for the life support hellicopter. I'm screwed too. lol

Here's my fav you wrote: So my husband can pick me up, throw me on the bed and ravish me without risking back surgery or death

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon I feel the SAME way. I think I've gotten picked up ONCE. I was going to do a list to be under 200lbs but after reading your's, screw that, I have enough to write out to be at goal. lol :) I'll let you know when I'm done! Great idea!!! YOU WILL DO THIS GIRL!! YOU HAVE TO! You have plenty of reasons to do it. Not wanting too, being tired/lazy, doesn't even compare to this list now does it? lol Keep this list handy at all times. I'm working on taking pics of my food and posting it. Mostly for me but it does work. Who wants to take a pic of an icecream cone and post it? Not me...but I'm gonna have to for my downfall yesterday. lol Today is a new day though! Let's do this!! :)

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I Will NOT Fear Fitness, AKA Fat Girl Win!

Friday, April 29, 2011

Today was supposed to be my day off from the gym AKA the day I get to sleep in. So I slept in, went to work, then felt guilty because I hadn't worked out. That and I had a bounce on the scale (up 1.8 pounds BUT I usually weigh in the AM) and I feel decidedly swollen, thick fingers, whole nine yards. So I went to the gym. Full disclosure: I still have residual onion ring guilt from yesterday, so I needed to go.

I didn't want to take a class. I've taken one class at a gym in my life, approximately 19 years ago when you could bounce quarters off my ass and I could swim 2oo lengths of the pool for giggles. You know the days... I had this awesome neon green leotard I wore over black biker type shorts. I was styling. I have digressed. Oops. Somehow, I had convinced myself that I couldn't possible try a class alone, I had to have a buddy, etc etc.

So I did 25 minutes on the treadmill. Then, after 25 minutes of psyching myself up, I decided it didn't matter if I was the fattest person in the class, I would give it a whirl. If I hated it or thought I was going to keel over from a massive MI, I would stop. Oh, wait, I also did a 45 second run at 5.5 mph and a 30 second run at the same speed. I felt some bad pain (the kind that makes you think you need surgery, not the kind that says, wow, you're working hard) so I think running may wait for another 20 pounds or so.

So I went to class. I was in the very back of the room... hiding... next to this tiny little 125 poundish hardbody. First class for both of us. We get started, we both look kind of silly, but the dance moves weren't THAT hard. After five minutes, I caught on. After five minutes, she LEFT. The instructor even tried to help her and I heard her say in a vaguely whiney kind of way, "I can't, this is my first class, I don't know what to do."

So the fat girl wins. It turns out I'd rather be fat and fearless than a skinny sissy. I wasn't the biggest person in the class either! Dance on fat girls, dance on!

So, in the interest of being honest and conquering my fears, here are my fitness fears:

Kickboxing class
Dance! Dance! class (today's class, woohoo!)
Real stairs and Stairmaster (HATE stairs, have always hated stairs--a nasty fall down stairs led to broken bones when I was a kid, besides, they hurt and I hate them, so there!)
Elliptical machines (I feel like I'm going to die after thirty seconds. Like call the squad, this girl needs CPR, we will need 15 people to carry her down the stairs to the ambulance kind of die)
Weight training
Planks (ouch!)
Spinning (the vomiting stories don't help)

Here's some more honesty for you. The treadmill I work out on every morning is on the third floor of the gym. I'd rather do 65 minutes on the treadmill than do those two flights of stairs. STAIR HATE!!! Every single day I'm at the gym I have to resist the urge to use the elevator that is conveniently located next to the stairs.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ELLA83 5/1/2011 4:19PM

    I love your blogs! You are so honest and so funny. Congrats on trying the class. I haven't had teh guts todo it yet. I want to try Zumba, but I cant dance lol I have 100 lbs to lose so we can lose together! I recently had to conquer the gym on my own as well. I had friends sign up with me and promise to go and never went so I decidied to stop making excuses and do it!

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BEACHGIRL76 4/30/2011 9:53AM

    Ha! I love your blog!! You remind me of ME soooo much. I used to think just like you about having to have a friend go with me, but I realized I don't have anyone I know as committed as I am on the same fitness level or that is close enough to me. The only way I could or will find a friend is if I meet them at my gym. I finally got the nerve up to go to a Zumba class and there were like 60 of us and NO mirrors! I was so happy to not see the mirrors. lol I already know I look stupid, I don't need to see myself doing it. lol Anyway I wasn't the biggest girl either and there were way more people looking sillier than I did but I thought it was cool that they got out there and shook their tail feathers as if they didn't have a care in the world, so why should I feel bad? Screw that, that's just the devil trying to tell us not to go so we'll stay fat. lol So I wanted to comment on your classes you mentioned and give you my thoughts, from one fat girl to another. lol

Yoga-this is an ok class but some instructors are harder than others. It's totally doable but still a tough class if you don't have balance. Good for you though! I say go for it!

Pilates-NOT for fat girls...ever! Try Yoga first. If you make it through that class THEN try pilates. I tried it once and that was all I needed to know I'll never go back being this fat and I'm 5'7" and 222lbs. Plus I used to be a gymnast and this class just sucked because all my core strength is gone. I couldn't do about 1/4-1/2 of the moves. It could depend on the instructor too.

Kickboxing class-I can't remember if I've done this one or not. I think I have. I think it's doable. Just go at your own pace.

Dance! Dance! class (today's class, woohoo!)-Zumba is all I've done and it's FUN. Again depending on the instructor...some are crazy high impact others are slower. The latin dancing for me was the hardest to catch on too, but after the first few songs you start catching on faster. It's fun and prepare to burn lots of calories and sweat your butt off!

Real stairs and Stairmaster-Hate the stairs too. I actually got on a stair master for the first time 2 days ago. It wasn't too bad. It was actually easier than climbing real stairs...I still didn't last long on it, but at least I tried it!

Running-not easy for fat girls. It's uncomfortable. I have done it though, but I prefer to be lighter. Like maybe 190 or at least under 200lbs. Pounding can't be good for my knees. I already have bad knees as it is. I can sprint at a 10 on a treadmill for at least 30 seconds (used to run track) but I never do it. It's just not comfortable and I'm afraid I'll hurt myself. So at most I'll jog on a 4.5 or 5 and if I'm hyper maybe a 6 for a minute or two but then I go back to walking. I think it just takes time to get used to it. Try a 5k plan. It's works. I've done it.

Elliptical machines-eh, I don't really care for them. They are boring to me. I'd rather just walk on a treadmill but that's what I'm used to I guess. I did it for 10 minutes at the most and got off because it was just too boring.

Weight training-my FAV! There are so many programs out there and so many machines. I love the fact that I'm strong and that muscle burns so many more calories per minute than fat does, so you need to learn to love it. lol Let me know if I can help, I could give you a plan or tips. :)

Planks (ouch!)-Yeah those are advanced moves. Hard on us fat girls. Doable, but HARD. We have a lot of weight that hangs down from our bellies and pulls on our back so it's uncomfortable! Try modified planks first where you are on your knees and hands like a modified push-up, then move down to your forearms and back up to your hands. Going back and forth can give you a good core workout!

Boxing-This would be fun I think, but never tried it!

Spinning (the vomiting stories don't help)-I'm scared. lol But I'm going to go maybe next week for the first time with another girl. I'll let you know how we do! lol

Hope I helped you at least a little. So proud of you for going and getting over your fears! Walking in is the hardest step, but after the first song, it's easy!

Comment edited on: 4/30/2011 9:58:20 AM

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BANJO_13 4/30/2011 8:12AM

    Proud of you! I am workig on being fearless too. It feels good and you will just keep on gaining confidence. Next thing you know, you'll be running 5K's then 10K's and who knows what else!

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AMYSRUN4LIFE 4/29/2011 10:52PM

    WTG!! It's awesome when we realize that we can do it when we put our minds to it!

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I finally sucked it up and took my 1st class at the Y and loved it...muscle max...then followed it up the next week with cardio kickboxing...oh...loved it too!! I use to hate the treadmill, til I found out it wasn't the treadmill itself I hated but walking on it, love jogging.


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SARAMOUSY 4/29/2011 9:28PM

    Good for you!
Continue with the fearlessness!

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GOLOPTIOUS 4/29/2011 9:12PM

    Congrats on being fearless!

I have fitness fears too! And they are pretty close to yours. I'm okay with the elliptical, though. I think my two biggest fears are classes of any kind and spinning. I hate feeling like I'm the biggest one there.

Maybe I'll check out the classes at my gym next week!

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NYKIMMIE 4/29/2011 8:53PM


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