Monday, July 18, 2011
Here I go again. i started weight Watchers last week...again. the first time I joined I lost 40 pounds, but stopped before I hit my goal and put it all back on and more. Then I tried Sparkpeople alone and was unsuccessful, so here I am again.
I'm not sure how much food tracking I'll do here because I'm tracking food already, but I sure could use some help in the exercise department.
I am so ashamed of how stiff and inflexible I am that I am too embarrassed to join any type of classes. Ugh. I am simply ashamed and really don't know how to get around it. I plan to walk on state land roads near my house with my dog to start out with, but I need strength training too.
My intentions are good but motivation is low and hating myself for not doing it is even worse. ugh.
This week it's supposed to be record breaking heat too, so easy to talk myself out of moving, so easy to hate it when I do. I need help!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
There are a few things that I find challenging in my home.
My husband is not a vegetarian and I am. I do most of the cooking. I'm not radical about not eating meat. I mean I don't expect him not to, it's just hard for me because I feel like I compromise my values when I cook meat for him. I've only been a vegetarian for a year, so it's new relatively speaking. I have many reasons why I have become one. I don't expect my husband to adopt my views. My whole way of eating is completely different than his.
For example, his birthday was yesterday so here's his meal request; Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, and of course birthday cake with peanut butter frosting. (did I mention I am not eating sugar either?) umm, yeah. Well, I made all that, because it makes him happy and it makes my stepson, his wife and my grandson happy, but I didn't eat any of it. That, was tough.
I also think, is it love when I feed them food that I think is essentially bad? I mean, what kind of person does that? Of course they don't think it's bad. Do I get radical and say hey, lets all mindfully have some of my delicious, fresh, organic, non-processed, veggies for dinner, instead of the processed, boxed, packaged, crap all of you usually eat, because I love you? Really, how is that gonna work?
This is the problem, I'm becoming a fairly "crunchy" gal, which is a personal evolution for me, and they have not. I like the changes I'm making and my thought is that I can only lead by example and talk about it without putting them down. My husband also cooks most of his own meat and shares whatever I'm having. The kids don't live here. I could go on a serious rant about their diets, but I'll save that for another post. Let's just say, the closest thing that comes to fiber in their diets is probably Doritos. Ugh!
Monday, October 26, 2009
I spent the weekend with friends out at "the Camp", a beautiful rustic cabin in the woods, and ended up losing my resolve. I feel bad about it but not as bad as I usually do. I mean I usually give up and stop trying for long periods of time. Then I gain weight back with a few extra pounds thrown in.
This time, I came home, read all my Sparks emails and thought, "I don't have to do that. I can just keep going with my new routine and KEEP losing weight."
I mean, why do I have to just chuck all the work I've done, throw up my hands and call myself a failure? I haven't stood on the scale yet, I'm afraid. I wasn't eating non stop or anything, but I definitely wasn't counting calories.
Today I'm just going to keep going as if I wasn't off the hook all weekend and I'm not going to beat myself up about it. I've still been doing more good for myself then bad and that is what I'm going to focus on. So, I'm off to walk with my dog, and I'm hoping the scale is not showing a gain.
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