JENNAAW   40,112
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WEC Blog: The person behind my mask

Saturday, November 01, 2014

Inside me there is a dancer and possibly even a singer. But I wear a rigid mask that prevents me from doing either. I think if that mask ever falls off you would find a wild dance somewhere.
I have worries about being laughed at and looking foolish. Attractive people seem to get laughed at far less than overweight people. I was with a group of people watching one of those "funniest videos" shows once and they laughed the loudest at clips where an overweight man or woman was placed in a silly situation. I think I would have to be model-thin before I dance in public, my aversion to trying it is so strong. Plus I would have to start that rhythm and practice thing from scratch since I haven't really danced since I was a kid! My favorite dances to watch- polka, tango, buck dancing.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STILLMENEWBODY 11/11/2014 9:24AM

    Hi!
I am just reading one of your blogs for the very first time. It was short and to the point but had enough strength to cause me to write. I instantly went to your photos and my thought was.....WHAT is she talking about? I just want to say that you are NOT fat. OK, I understand what matters most is how you view yourself, how you feel and how your weight affects you each day. I respect that.
You say you would love to dance but fear being mocked, laughed at because you are not "Janet Jackson". There are dancers of all shapes and sizes that partake in various kinds of dance. Yes, I agree, the physique is an important part of it all but mostly for how it performs. I am willing to bet that if you truly, truly had a passion to dance and you were committed to the time it takes to become great at it, the size you are today, would not matter. That being said, if you put all that hard work in...I am a firm believer you would have your desired physique you dream about.
I hope you find enough self love and confidence within you to follow your dream. You deserve it! emoticon

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IMAGINE_IT 11/1/2014 2:55PM

    I totally understand what you are saying..... emoticon
But Life is too short to worry about those people who may....but most likely not laugh..watch or talk about you!! So go out there and dance like no one is watching! emoticon Go for it and Dance!!! emoticon

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GEORGE815 11/1/2014 11:57AM

    I think we all have those defenses of not wanting to be embarrassed if we can help it!

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Superhero Strength Here

Friday, October 31, 2014

I have had many obstacles thrown my way in life, just like everyone else, I imagine. I am very shy (it runs on both sides of my family) and 99% of the time choose to withdraw from anything that might call attention to me. Throughout school I would crack when assigned to speak. I would either stutter uncontrollably or start laughing and not be able to stop. Really serious problems! I recently was offered an opportunity to volunteer for a cause I believe in as a speaker. I am worried that I will start to stutter, stammer or freeze (I doubt I will laugh because this is a serious cause) but I have gathered up my superhero strength to do this!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IMAGINE_IT 11/1/2014 2:51PM

    emoticon on facing your 'fear' of speaking in public.....Could you maybe practice in front of family or friends before you go out there and speak? I am positive that you will do great. emoticon

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BKWERM 10/31/2014 5:58PM

    I'm sure you'll do fine. If Dena can make a presentation with only a few weeks of preparation, I know you can, too. Just be as prepared as possible and you'll be fine.

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YISKAMIRYAM 10/31/2014 2:50PM

    And when you get through this, you'll be so proud of yourself!

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10000 Steps

Monday, October 27, 2014

At least I think I did 10000 steps. I haven't figured out how to get Map My Walk to show steps. The wind was against me and I had to hold on to my hat. There is still some pretty color although it is past its prime in my area. Came home to make a nice lunch of oven fried potatoes, apple cider, and leftover chicken. Oh and a soak up to my chin in a hot tub of water.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BABYBARNEY 10/28/2014 1:08PM

    Great job on the 10,000 steps you are on your way to great activity!

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JENSTRESS 10/27/2014 4:10PM

    Yes, 10k in steps is around 5k in steps. You did good

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Exercise Commitment

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

My husband confessed to me as we drove home from the gym in the pouring rain (it has been raining since last night and the roads have huge puddles everywhere!) that he would not have ventured out had it not been for me and the Pilates class I take. ( I really hate to miss a class because I lose so much precious ground in a week's time but if he had said he didn't want to go, I would have stayed home.) I also ran on the treadmill after the class. We are so glad that we support each other and nudge each other along when one of us wants to just relax at home. We have also discussed what we would do if one of us becomes unable to go to the gym. We would have to stay strong and keep working out without each other. He had a heart attack when he was in his early 50s and I had my huge bout with cancer later; we know what it is like to have a major disruption in our routines.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRAVELGO 10/18/2014 7:55PM

  That is GREAT!!

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LILSUZY1057 10/14/2014 11:10PM

    That's so great that you have that support right there beside you all the time. Unfortunately, my sister and I aren't such good supports. If one of us gives even a hint that we don't want to go, the other caves in also. Gotta get my groove on!

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Too little sleep, no rich color change outside but a good day...

Saturday, October 11, 2014

I had a “freakout” night where I woke up a little after 1 and couldn't fall back asleep. I went downstairs to read until 3:30 and then managed to sleep 3 hours upstairs. Hubby is a light sleeper and he came downstairs to investigate, poor guy. Today was a day off from the gym so we wanted to go on trails to see fall colors. The colors are still far from their peak. First few steps of our hike we started talking about what we will cook for dinner when we got home. Last night we had round steak, rice, loads of pickles, and tossed salad. We liked it so much we wanted the same thing for tonight. We walked at a leisurely pace. Hubby asked if I wanted to walk a little extra at the end to make it exactly 8 miles, but my feet had blisters so I declined. It was in the mid 50s all day today. It got dark quickly and now we are wrapped in blankets watching football on tv.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OWLWENEEDISLOVE 10/13/2014 8:43AM

    Great time of yr to see the colors :) sounds like a wonderful walk to me.

Have a great day spark friend !

emoticon emoticon

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A-STRONGER-ME 10/13/2014 8:27AM

    emoticon what a great walk

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JENNAAW 10/13/2014 8:12AM

    Those are beautiful, tiny maple leaves in the photo, I didn't do them justice with my technique but take my word for it they were breathtakingly delicate. I don't know my trees; anyone know what these tiny-leaved maple trees are called?

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ROUNDTOWNMOM 10/13/2014 8:02AM

    Beautiful trail to walk on!

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ITS_MY_TURN_NOW 10/11/2014 9:38PM

    Sounds like you had a nice time. I love this time of the year! emoticon emoticon

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FORZACHANDMATT 10/11/2014 8:55PM

    So pretty - I bet that trail is gorgeous when the colors change more! And what a long hike - good for you! I use map my walk/run too and really like it!

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DAIZYSTARLITE 10/11/2014 8:32PM

    emoticon

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