Monday, May 02, 2011
I think I am still in shock, to be honest. I went to bed early last night because I was very tired. I didn't sleep well at all (and to be honest I sometimes have very spiritual thoughts about that and wondering if I am being called to get up, but that is another thought trail). I don't know what time I really laid in bed and didn't move. So annoying.
So I get up to finish prepping the kids to eat and catch their bus. I had not been on my computer or turned on the news (don't really watch news here...just read online). My oldest son stops me (he's 11) and says 'Mom my friend on xbox just told me that they killed Osama bin Laden'. Of course I instantly responded that I had heard Ghadafi (sp) had lost his son and grandchildren in gunfire, and I told him I had heard of that but nothing about bin Laden.
Then I head up to the middle level and my husband tells me. I was really caught off guard. And then I think, for the rest of the day, I have been cycling through a grief process. I am really surprised at it myself, but I have gone from being excited (more at the thought of the potential for the war to end and my brother in law is currently deployed and I hate deployments), to sad. The denial came first. I cannot really say I have felt anger. I have felt more disappointment in some of the responses and postings I have seen from people today.
Yes, he was a bad man. Yes, he made me cry many days in sadness over the loss of innocent lives. I will never forget that horrible day and the days thereafter.
I am sad and solemn about so many lives lost over these years. I am grateful for the courage of our servicemen and servicewomen. And I stand behind our country's leader. That has truly been a point of concern I have had today. The lack of respect, pardon me...I don't care what party line any one person is registered to. There is something that I think has saddened me more than anything today. The true lack of respect for our country's leader. I am not asking anyone to embrace and approve of any one person. But there is respect. It has been fading in my generation (and others) over the years and I just shake my head. I remember being in a public high school (having come from private school) and was appalled at the lack of respect with kids, teachers, and otherwise. It was unacceptable to me, and it still is today.
Perhaps it was the way my parents raised me. So thank you, Mom and Dad...for instilling in me the importance of being respectful, even if you couldn't put your whole heart into it...but because it was the right thing to do.
Please don't post an explanation as to why disrespect is okay. Because it isn't.
There are people who feel relief today, but still have empty arms and homes due to what happened on 9/11 or the resulting war. For them, and for so many other innocent lives lost, I pray for them.