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Goal #1 get emotional eating under control....

Monday, January 03, 2011

My biggest desire is to master emotional eating once and for all!! To master binging and to come to terms with what life throws at you without turning to food.

Food has been a comfort, my escape and has literally become my addiction to solve all problems(more like mask all problems) Some drink, some smoke, do drugs...I EAT. I eat when I'm stressed, i eat when I'm tired, i eat when I'm sad, angry. when i'm feeling guilty or overwhelmed....I EAT and boy do i eat. I wish i can say i eat a lot of apples, carrots and salad but when we feel emotionally distraught the only food that seems to call us and temporally make us feel better would be the delicious chocolate, fries, cakes, breads and all the comfort food imaginable. I'm out of control and i need to put the breaks on before i creep back up not slowly but rather quickly at this rate.

2 months ago i lost my niece 29years of age. She died in a tragic car accident on her way to work for me at one of my restaurants. Her death has affected me in a big way and i'm masking it with food as i bring myself to work everyday trying to pretend like i'm ok. And when i am at home i do the same for my daughter's sake for my husband's sake...even for myself i try to pretend that I'm ok but i'm not...I know i'm not... gained 20lbs and suffer from headaches and i'm eating out of never before. I need to stop...I have to stop...i feel it physically affecting me and the weight gain is just adding to my depression.

Less then 5 months ago i realized one of my long desired own my own restaurant....not one but two...
I became quickly overwhelmed by trying to be super-mom, super-wife, super-boss, super-businesswomen and super-partner....then Lidia(my niece) passes away in the mist of all this and i slowly stop caring abut wearing on these hats...I can only do my best.

Today i took the day off and made a doctor's appt(get my blood work done), also called to see a therapist(need to talk to someone)now this was the next thing. Sparkpeople has helped me in the past get back into shape like nothing else!! I really need to surround myself with the same things that made me loose 50plus lbs in the first place...I never want to go back to being that heavy again.

So that's my story so far....Got 20lbs to loose...Would love to loose it by this spring but more then anything would love to get emotional eating under control.......
and to find peace of mind again.

Any ideas?

Thank you for reading xo

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DSJB9999 1/4/2011 3:13AM

    So sorry to hear of your loss! I agree the Lord takes the children he needs.

I also believe the Lord only gives 'difficulties' and 'challenges' to those people who can 'handle them'. You are stronger than you think.

I really like LMALSBURY's ideas about the jar, going to use it for my issues too!

One step at a time. Keep sparking.

emoticon emoticon
Donna x

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OOLALA53 1/4/2011 12:42AM

    I can only imagine the pain your have been living with. You are taking many of the right steps. I'm glad you're on the LBF team. Our 21-day thread is very active. We have all paired food with all kinds of thoughts and emotions for a long time. We can unhook the connection. Sometimes there is nothing that will change our difficult situations in the present, but we can always do something else besides eat. And sometimes we eat anyway. You must have compassion and forgiveness for yourself, too. I hope you can find a way to grieve and that this emotional weight will lift soon. I wish it sounded like you could let your family share this with you, but you know your situation best. You deserve big hugs! emoticon

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LMALSBURY 1/4/2011 12:20AM

    I read this idea from somewhere and hope it might help you out. I too am/was an emotional eatter. I still am to a point but not nearly as much as I was almost a yr ago.

Okay, here is a challenge that will help with emotional eating. Do the following:

*Find a jar, small box, or bag that you can keep close to your refrigerator, pantry, or desk drawer.

*Get a piece of blank paper and scissors. Cut your paper into 10-20 strips.

*Get a pen.

On each piece of paper, WRITE SOMETHING YOU CAN DO BESIDES EATING RIGHT NOW. Here are a few suggestions to get you started:

*Brush your teeth
*Paint your fingernails
*Go write a letter
*Go type an e-mail
*Take the dog for a walk
*Kick a ball around the yard with the kids
*Put in an exercise DVD
*Phone a friend for support
*Jump rope
*Chew Gum
*Drink a big glass of water

You get the idea, right? Put these suggestions into your jar and keep them close to where you will be tempted. Most of the time, we aren't hungry when we go to the fridge. We are feeling emotional or we are actually thirsty.

Instead of letting our emotions get the best of us (and sabotaging bathing suit season), we need to focus on something else besides food.

Have a I KNOW I CAN, I KNOW I CAN attitude and YOU can do it!

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BET212 1/3/2011 11:36PM

    I am so sorry for your loss. I know how painful the death of a loved one can be. emoticon

It sounds like you are taking the right steps...going to an MD for a physical and seeing a therapist so you can deal with your emotions. It's funny how we think we can push those feelings away with food. But the feelings are there, deep down no matter what we eat and the food just adds to our misery. We feel better temporarily but it doesn't last long, nor is it worth the cost to our health.

For emotional eaters it has become such an automatic part of our functioning that we forget we do have other choices. Talking to a professional; talking to your family; making healthy choices as often as you can are all steps in the right direction. With time, the old unhealthy habits will start to change to new healthy ones. I pray you find some peace of mind soon. emoticon

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1_AMAZING_WOMAN 1/3/2011 11:34PM

    I am so sorry to hear about your neice. I understand that at a time like this it is probably hard to care so much about taking care of your restraunts, your family, and everything else. But, hang in there. It is good that you are going to see a therapist. Someone to talk to to help you sound out all that you're feeling and get through it.

I wish you the very best in getting through this time.

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2BFREE2LIVE 1/3/2011 10:57PM

    I am still here my friend, just let me know how I can help. I am sorry for your loss but you must think ahead to the future and not dwell on the past as it is not your fault. The Lord only takes his children when he is ready for them. You know he let me stay to help others and I am here for you. Sandy

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To all you wonderful Sparkspeople; I believe!!!

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Nikki Yanofsky : I Believe

There comes a moment when my heart must stand alone
On this lonely path I've chosen
Like a house thats not a home

Sometimes when I feel I've had enough
And I feel like giving up
You willed me to be all I can be
Now nothing can stop me

I believe in the power that comes
From a world brought together as one
I believe together we'll fly
I believe in the power of you and I

This is the moment we have dreamed of all our lives
We'll be the change we wish from others
We'll stand tall for what is right
And in my heart there'll be no doubt
The arms of the world will come reaching out
And embrace me to be all I can be
Now nothing can stop me

I bel From a world brought together as one
I believe together we'll fly
I believe in the power of you and I
I believe in the power of you and I

I believe, I believe, I believe in..
I believe, I believe in you
I believe, I believe, I believe in..
I believe, I believe in you
I believe, I believe, I believe in you

I believe together we'll fly ieve in the power that comes
believe in the power of you and I
I believe the time is right now
To stand tall and make the world proud
I believe together we'll fly
I believe in the power

I believe in the power that comes
From a world brought together as one
(Of you and I)

I believe together we'll fly
I believe in the power of you and I

I believe the time is right now
(Of you and I)
Stand tall and make the world proud

I believe together well fly
(Together we'll fly)
I believe in the power of you and I
I believe in the power of you and I

emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WOOLRIPPER 3/9/2010 9:40PM

    This is just beautiful. Thank you.

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HICALGAL 3/9/2010 8:18PM


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SIEGRID 3/9/2010 4:07PM

Belief is what it's all about!!

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DSJB9999 3/9/2010 1:14PM

    Wow Irene, this is a lovely, lovely piece. I think you're right there is power in the Spark community.

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My continous battle with food addiction and emotional eating :S

Sunday, March 07, 2010

I don`t know if consequence of the stress i've been going through lately or me being an emotional eater but I AM REALLY STRUGGLING LATELY WITH MY DIET. i get anxiety just thinking of it and when i come to track my food and it`s mid day and i`ve already eaten over 1000 calories i`m a nervous wreck. i don`t know what is happening to me but i feel like i`m loosing my mind over this obsession to be thin and this addiction i have to food. I really believed when i started this new year i had won the battle and now i realize it truly is a problem deeper then lbs deeper then portion control...well i knew it but i guess its even deeper and more disturbing then i thought!!!!...... I remember when i started last year to loose the weight thinking when i get to 145 i will love my body and feel so much better about myself. i think in some way.....i felt better in my skin at 200 then i do now.

In the processes of loosing weight i was falling in love with myself again and so loving the new Irene...i was slowly gaining control of my life again and overcoming obstacles and doing things i never thought i could do. I don`t know if it was all too much too soon but i`m very drained and anxious when it comes to taking care of me these last 2 or so months....its truly a big effort and tiring. it was easy being 200+lbs i didn`t have to be accountable but now its another story people r looking to me for inspiration and constantly checking me out when the see me. The gym i work out at asked me last week for before and after pics of would think i`d be flattered by that i was partially but mostly i was like i can`t find any nice after expectations went up another notch and i was beginning to wonder can i truly be that poster girl for his campaign he is running at the gym (biggest looser program) i`m telling u since he`s asked i`ve been eating like no tomorrow and sabotaging everything i`ve worked hard for. I NEED TO GET A GRIP & every meal i tell myself its a new meal, a new day...u know what u have to do, don`t sweat it...yet my motions don`t want to listen to all that logic. in just one week i went up on the scale approx 4-5lbs. i had said good bye to the 140`s now this morning i weighed in @ 142...i`m so angry with myself but yet i`m like hungry all the time and all hormonal....anyone else ever feel this anxiety at this point in the weight loss journey. You know the other day i bought a box of thinsations bars both in chocolate and cheesecake....i ate the 2 boxes in two days....whats the use of 100 calorie snack when u end up eating the whole box. I AM SO FRUSTRATED WITH MYSELF. I find these 5lbs i gained really show and had such a hard time getting dressed today....i found myself to be very self-conscious and all of this is making me extremely sad. I have a daughter and i want to lead a good example and be a role model but what am i saying about myself and teaching her if i can't love my body and celebrate my curves.... It`s the flab & cellulite that gets to me really but whatever my self consciousness is all about....i'm beginning to think its really just a few months i went from being proud to extremely self-conscious i wonder why???
Anyhow...i could go on and on but ya i`d love to hear from u all and see if there r others that can relate and have overcome....truly overcome their addiction, emotional eating.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OOLALA53 3/10/2010 7:05PM

    You have hit the nail on the head. We can "diet" to a certain weight. But how do we live? I don't know what the answer will be for you, but my most recent one has been the No S Diet. It should really be called the No S lifestyle. I don't feel like I am dieting. I feel like I am living my life, eating my meals, enjoying my food. However, I am not at a goal weight. But I am not going to judge any weight results until I have been doing this for one year. I am just so happy not to be stressing over my meals.

I know you will find the routine you can LIVE with. emoticon

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SIEGRID 3/9/2010 4:06PM

    Lot's of good advice given here. I am also addicted to food. I have also being going through a bad time since august of last year. I did manage to put back on 15 pounds. But when I start giving myself talks it usually gets worse and then I berate myself more. I have gotten past how I look, although I admit to liking alot the way I do, but now for me it comes down to how I feel. How much energy I have and the things that I am able to now that I couldn't before, mind you I am a lot older than you are. My maianstay is susgarless gum which I chew like it's going out of style :-). Don't give up on yourself and don't put yourself down. Everyone has bad days. Love your body and youirself and try concentrating on energy levels. It works for me.

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NEVERNAKED 3/8/2010 8:55AM

    strummin' my pain with her fingers, singin' my life with her words..

you have described a tee! it's incredible.

so, i don't know if i can offer any words of wisdom but please know that you are not alone in your struggles. i have the same ugly conversations with myself everyday.

i think that being happy in your own skin is the ultimate goal and it's something we all strive for..some more successfully than others.

so, i offer you hugs and the comfort of knowing you're not alone..i'm sorry i can't be more helpful!

try to have a cheerful day,
Tracy :)

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CINDYT63 3/7/2010 10:58PM

    When you are overweight it's easy to think all your problems are because you are overweight. So when you lose the weight there's no focus for all that anxiety. It sounds like the honeymoon is over with the weight loss and you are struggling with the "I'm not enough" issue. At the core of your issues are probably self esteem issues that are exacerbated by the emotional issues you are going through. It sounds like a counsellor and a support system could help.
We all need to learn to love ourselves regardless of our weight, and find other ways of coping and taking care of ourselves.
You don't have to be perfect.
AND...the 21 day binge free team is an excellent source of support and accountability for whatever you are working on.
Good luck to you. You have accomplished alot. Celebrate yourself!

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SPARKNMOM 3/7/2010 8:42PM

    Hugs to you. Sounds like you're dealing with a lot right now. I know that for ME, it's SO much more than losing the weight. Like you, I've dealt with emotions that I never imagined since losing the weight. I feel like I'm a whole new me and everything and everyone around me is the same...and I no longer fit.

I stalled about 20 pounds before I hit goal - and I was stalled for about 7 months. I don't think I sabotaged myself, but I certainly didn't HELP myself until I really got a grip and recommit myself. Take care. You've done a great job - you don't want to go back to your old habits - so keep trudging along. You can do it!!

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WKLYTTON 3/7/2010 7:57PM

    breathe girl.. breathe.

You are going through some real hard emotions and stress... but I know you can do it. Have a little faith in yourself. You got this :)

Hugs, Kelly

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Food Label Lies & Loopholes About to Get a Smackdown?

Thursday, February 18, 2010

I know some of u receive this newsletter already but those of u who don`t...found this to b intresting......

For years, concerned consumers and watchdog organizations have been screaming that the U.S. labeling laws are full of loopholesand in need of serious revision. After years of talk, the Foodand Drug Administration (FDA) says they're planning to so something about it. But will it be enough? There are many food labeling issues we could complain about, but one of the biggest problems (due to its direct relationshipto obesity) is serving sizes. I'm not just talking about super-sizing. What's worse is thatthe actual calories are being disguised with serving size sleight of hand. Let me show you some examples: Tostitos touch of lime. Calories per serving 150. Not too bad for tortilla chips eh? Not so fast. Check that serving size. 1 ounce. That's 6 chips. There are 10 servings per container. That's 1500 calories in the bag. Most guys could knock off half that bag for a cool 750 calories. Ok, suppose you have some restraint and you only eat a third of the bag (20 chips). You still get 500 calories. But who stops at 6 chips? Vitamin Water. While I could rant about how sugar water is being marketed as health food, I'll stick with the serving size sleight for now. The label says there are only 50 calories per serving. Plus they add all those vitamins. Must be good for you and perfect for dieters, right? Think again. Look at the serving size and servings per container: 8 oz per serving and 2.5 servings per 20 oz container. Excuse me, but is there ANY reason for making it 2.5 servingsother than to disguise the actual calorie content? When you see that the entire bottle is 20 ounces, you realizethat it contains 125 calories, not 50. Although 20 ounces is a large bottle, I don't know many guys who wouldn't chug that whole thing. Sobe Lifewater? Same trick in their 20 oz bottles. Healthy Choice soup, country vegetable. They make these in convenient little microwavable containers with a plastic lid. Just heat and eat. It says 90 calories and 480 mg of sodium per serving. Wow, less than a hundred calories. Wait a minute though. Turn the container around and you see the serving size is 1 cup and the servings per container says "about 2." Huh? It looks pretty obvious to me that this microwave-ready container was designed for one person to eat in one sitting, so why not just put 180 calories per container on the label (and 960 mg of sodium). I guess 90 calories and 480 mg sodiumsounds... well... like a healthier choice! Ben and Jerrys chocolate fudge brownie ice cream. This infamously delicious ice cream with its own facebook fan page has 270 calories per serving. We all know ice cream is loaded with calories and should only be an occasional treat, but 270 calories per serving, that's not too terrible is it? Look a little closer at the label. The serving size is ½ a cup. Who eats a half a cup of ice cream? In fact, who hasn't polished off a whole pint by themselves? According to Ben and Jerry, there are 4 servings in that one pint container. 270 calories times 4 servings = 1080 calories! That's about half a days worth of calories for an average female. I could go on and on - crackers, chocolate chip cookies, muffins, pasta, boxed cereals (who eats ¾ a cup of cereal), etc. But I think you get the point. What's the solution to this mess? News reports in the last week say that the FDA may be cracking down. One of their ideas is to post nutritional information, including the calories, on the FRONT of the food labels. The problem is, this move by itself could actually make matters worse. Suppose Tostitos started posting "150 calories per serving" right on the front of the bag. Most people would assume the chips were low in calories. Putting calorie info on the front of the label would help only if it clearly stated the amount of calories in the entire packageor in a normal human-sized serving! Ah, but the FDA says they're on top of that too. They also want to standardize or re-define serving sizes. Sounds great at first, but critics say that consumers would take it as approval to eat larger servings so the strategy would backfire. I'm not against the FDA's latest initiative, but what we really need is some honesty in labeling. Food manufacturers should not be allowed to manipulate serving sizes in a way that would trick you into thinking there are fewer calories than there really are in a quantity that you'relikely to eat. It would be nice to have calories for the entire package listedon the label at a glance. A new rating scale for caloric density would be cool too, if it could be easily interpreted. It would also be nice to have serving sizes chosen for quantitiesthat are most likely to be commonly eaten. But standardizationof serving sizes for all types of foods is difficult. My friends from Europe tell me that food labels over there are listed in 100g portions, making comparisons easy. But when you consider how much each individual's daily calorie needs can vary (easily 3-fold or more when you run the gamut from totally sedentary to elite athlete, not to mention male and female differences), standardization that applies to everyone may not be possible. I think the recent laws such as requiring calories on restaurant menus are a positive move that will influence some people's behavior. But no label changes by themselves will solve the obesity crisis. A real solution is going to have to include personal responsibility, nutrition education, self-discipline, hard work and lifestyle change. Changes in the labeling laws won't influence everybody becausethe people most likely to care about what labels say are those who have already made a commitment to change their lifestyles. There's one true solution to this portion distortion and label lies problem: CALORIE AWARENESS.

Of course that includes educated label reading, but it goes much further. In my Burn the Fat, Feed the Muscle system, ( is how I define it: 1. Get a good calorie counter book, chart or electronic device/softwareand get to know the calorie counts of all the staple foods you eat on a daily basis. Look up the calorie values for foods you eat occasionally. 2. Always have a daily meal plan - on paper - with calories printed for each food, each meal and the day. Use that menu as a daily goal and target. 3. Educate yourself about average caloric needs for men and women and learn how to estimate your own calorie needs as closely as you can based on your activity, weight, body composition, height, gender and age. 4. Get a good kitchen food scale and use it. Keep counting calories and doing nutrition by the numbers until you are unconsciously competent and eating the right quantities to easily maintain your ideal weight becomes second nature. Obviously, saying that calories are all there is to nutrition is like saying that putting is all there is to golf. Calorie quality and quantity are both important. However, it's a mistake to ignore the calorie quantity side of the game. Serving sizes matter and even healthy foods get stored as fat if you eat too much. You can play "blindfolded archery" by guessing your calories and food portions if you want to. Hey, you might get lucky and guess right. Personally, I wouldn't recommend depending on luck - or the government - for something as important as your body and your health. Train hard and expect success, Tom Venuto, Author of Burn The Fat, Feed The Muscle

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOLLIEMAC 2/18/2010 6:40PM

    Awesome blog! You are a wicked shopper for sure...MJ emoticon emoticon

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SWAL0701 2/18/2010 12:13PM


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