just OVERWEIGHT!

Saturday, April 27, 2013

I can't believe my eyes. I weighed in today and finally lost that last pound of what I like to call my "hybernation" weight. You know those dreaded pounds you gain during the winter? Yeah, those ugly things. That's my most inactive season. For some reason I can't find the will, want, energy or time to do anything resembeling exercise. So I've been trying to wake up early in the morning before my troops get up for school. I've been putting in about 30 on the "DREAD" mill and it has helped. I lost the 6 pounds I gained this winter :) Now I have Just 20 to go!!!!

Most people would hear 20 pounds and be discouraged, NOT ME!! I'm taking these pounds DOWN! coming from almost 310 pounds to 185 so far, 20 pounds is nothin'. I have no doubt that this 20 will take me quite a while, as I'm sure I will find excuses not to exercise or a slice of pie that looks too good to pass up.. But those are the things I'm learning to just take in stride. Pick myself up and dust myself off. I'll get there cause I'm friggin' dedicated, no matter how long it takes. There's no dead line (Although I would have liked to reach my goal by my 32nd bday in July) this is the lifestyle that I'm choosing for the rest of my life. I'm sure it will always be a battle, there will be wins and losses because I LOVE FOOD! But I also love the feeling of accomplishment and hate to FAIL! So if anything, I have that going for me. I will not fail!


Okay, so anyway the whole point of this blog was the numbers lol . So I weighed in and changed my goal on spark, and you know how it brings you to the BMI chart? well my numbers are 29. something I think.. which puts me in the JUST OVERWEIGHT catergory!! AHHH! Again, people would be like "why the hell are you so happy with being Overweight?" and I'd say "because I'm not OBESE anymore!" That's what I've been working for. Now by no means do I actually follow this unrealistic , crazy ass chart.. but.. I mean if this unrealistic, crazy ass chart considers me JUST OVERWEIGHT, then.. hey, I'll take it!

Now my Doc says there isn't an actual weight goal that he has in mind for me. He says "If you have extra weight here, here and here (pointing to all the not so great areas of my body) then thats okay, It's around the stomach he says that is the most crucial to lose. He wants me to get rid of the strain around the intestines and so on. So that's another part of the goal I guess. So if I get to 165 pounds down and I still have stomach fat (which I have no doubt I will) then MAYBE, I will push myself to lose more.

This whole thing isn't just about looking and feeling great, although man, that helps! But I really want to add years to the life I have with my family. I want to be around for all the good and bad. I want to be something like the best me that I can be for these people that I love! Sappy, I know. We're not guaranteed time here. My husband passed away almost 8 years ago at the age of 26 from cancer. Our two girls already lost one parent.. and while I know that anything could happen to take us away from each other, I would like to do my best to make sure that doesn't happen for quite a while. So 20 pounds.. got nothin' on me (denzel washington voice lol)

So thanks for reading this JUST OVERWEIGHT girls Blog .. Keep SPARKIN'!

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little by little I guess

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Well, I'm pretty sure today is my two year spark anniversary. Glad I atleast attempted to put in a little time exercising.

I did 20 minutes of walk , jog , run intervals on the treadmill max speed 6. I haven't run in about 2 weeks so it felt like starting all over again and I hated just about every minute of it!


I have had the worst time trying to convince myself to exercise every day. I use excuses like the kids have practice or games EVERYDAY and there's just not enough time in my day ( which is partly true ) But, I need to at some point be honest with myself. I've become a little lazy again. Not drastically lazy where I would waste an entire beautiful day sitting on the couch in the house shoving fast food in my face, but lazy enough to feel awful about myself again. I'm still up 3 pounds (which reminds me, I need to change my weight tracker) and I know that 3 isn't going to come off unless I get back to sweating my ass off! It's just convincing myself to do it. This morning I laid in bed having an internal fight with myself about getting up and running so that I wouldn't have to do it when I got home. Well, I didn't do it and by the time I got home from work (which ended up being a half day for me) I was already trying to find reasons not to do it! UGH, wth!


I know I can do it cause I've gotten this damn far. So I guess I just really have to take it little by little. I signed up for a 5k in august so If i don't train my body to run those miles , it's just going to be my fault come game day . Maybe that will convince me LOL :)

Been gone too long!

Monday, April 15, 2013

Wow, Its seems like forever since I've visited this place. I haven't been able to keep up with spark like I used to due to having no computer :( but now I'm back and hopefully I can get back to it. Its crazy how much of a difference Spark makes in my life. I can tell the difference in the way my body looks and feels when I'm NOT tracking my food. Its so much easier to let things slip and slide when you don't have that hard copy of what you're putting in your mouth. Sometimes I can keep a tally in my head of my calories but It's not the same as seeing the numbers at the end of the day. Now I just have to get back in the habit of coming here every day and entering in all my info into my trackers, and hopefully with the encouragement from all my friends here I can get back to doing all the things that made me feel great.

So update. I made it to 122 pounds down , but now fluctuate between 118 and 122. I'm hoping to get that back under control and finish losing the 20-25 that I have left. That is the ultimate goal. Well that and toning up some of the not so HOT areas of the body :) So this is it for now. Glad to be back!

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I have FINALLY reached 100 lbs down!!!

Thursday, March 15, 2012

I stepped on the scale today and saw the numbers 207. Quite a few seconds ticked by before I even realized what that meant. I was literally asking myself, why do I feel like that number is so important? and then it hit me. 100 LBS DOWN!! Oh my god 100 pounds down! I got off, and on about five more times.. just to be sure. (I always do anyway.. it's an old habit from my old busted scale LOL) I remember telling myself that when I finally got to 100 pounds down I would do a friggin' kart wheel.. (i'm not even sure I spelled that correctly and I don't care) I didn't, I was too afraid to hurt myself! I went into my bed room and woke up my fiancé with the news. He ofcourse told me he was soooo proud of me while trying not to fall back asleep. I told my oldest daughter and she was super excited. I later ofcourse had to tell my entire facebook world.. it got about 20 something comments and 43 likes... so ofcourse I have to come here and tell you guys. You're my people, you're the ones that UNDERSTAND what this means.

I'm not nearly done with this yet. I still have at least 40something more pounds to go until I get to that END GOAL.. and from then we'll see where I land. If i'm finally comfortable with me then I'll let it be.. If I never get there, then it'll keep me going for the rest of my life.. who knows. I sure don't. All I know is that from the first day I signed onto this site it was a blessing. I surfed through peoples pages, success stories, blogs, thinking there's no way I'm ever going to get where these people are.. but little by little I started making friends on here and I am doing it and I'm proud of it!

I have no doubt in my mind that there are still going to be rough days. Tomorrow could be a rough day for all I know and hopefully I'll get through it. Who knows if I'll even squeeze in a run or workout tomorrow.. I'll be myself up either way and then I'll move on. That's what each day needs to be.. MOVING FORWARD =)

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Feeling good for today.. I'll take it =)

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Well friends, for today I'm okay with where I am at. I have 3 pound to go to reach 100 pounds down. At this moment, right now, sitting on my couch writing this blog.. I'm extremely happy about this. I feel confident and somewhat accomplished. Not to say this won't go away and that the frustration won't come back, but for today.. I'll take it!

I'm loving walking/jogging/running on my treadmill. The hardest part for me is convincing myself (once the children have all finally gone upstairs to play or sleep) that I need to get down there and get on the damn thing. Once I'm on it I have no problems. I bring my Nook down and listen to Pandora, plug in my program and I go. For some of the programs I still have to stop and grab a drink or even slow it down a little .. but I'm still doing it.. So that too I'll take =)

I bought a bathing suit for the first time in like ummm.. 10-15yrs lol! Actually it's just the top. I've always worn shorts for the bottoms and I don't know that that will ever change. But for now , I'm okay with that. Although I must say that I can see the difference in my legs already and I've only owned the treadmill like a week and a half . Anyways, back to the bathing suit (top) it's something I would have NEVER bought or worn when I was bigger and I'm almost kind of excited to wear it. There's still some areas that I'm uncomfortable with and that need a little extra time from me but I'm hoping it will give me the mojo to get that taken care of.

I ALSO bought a dress.. Nothing fancy, but super cute and also something I would have never bought or worm back in my BIG days. It's really more like a summer hangin' out at the beach or relaxing in the back yard kind of dress. I bought it in a 14-16 because the only other option was a 20-22 and I think that would have been too big. Which to me just saying something is going to be too big is still very foreign, scary and exciting all balled into one. So when it gets here, If it's too small, I'll have to work that much harder to be able to wear it comfortably and for now.. I'm okay with that =)

I'm loving the bodybugg that I bought and I think it's helping me better understand how many calories I'm burning during the day just in natural everyday movements. That's a big help, cause now when I get home I look down at the display and I know how many calories I have left in my calorie burn goal for the day. Still having trouble reaching that goal everyday, but at least I know where I'm going wrong and what I can do to fix it.

So these are my small updates and successes.. small .. BUT... I'm gonna take them and run... literally ..

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