Monday, November 26, 2012
I am seriously tired of being fat. I've been fat all my life. I don't want to do it anymore. I just don't know where to begin. I don't know how I can motivate myself. I've made this deal with myself a million times and a million times I have given up before it even really begun. I've always felt like I could do more. Like I had it in me to bust it out and get with the program, but I let my apathy and fear of work get in the way. It's easier to do nothing, you know. And to be honest...I really freaking like doing nothing.
I want this for my daughter. I don't want her growing up and making the same mistakes I did. I want her to be healthy and confident. I want her to be strong and independent. I don't want her to be a slave to food or her own apathy. I want this because I want to fully appreciate what it means to be alive. I want to reach my full potential. Plus, it would be really cool to not be the first to go in the zombie apocalypse. I want this so I can walk into a room and not feel like the fattest person there.
I don't know how I am going to get there or even how I am going to start. I have no clue how to exercise or read labels or anything else. I probably can't even walk a mile without heaving like Marlon Brando. I just don't know. I guess this is a start. A superficial and narcissistic start, but a start.