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Tiny Clothes

Friday, August 13, 2010

Today I am wearing tiny clothes! I am wearing a shirt that I originally bought back in the summer of 2001 when I weighed 165 pounds! And I'm wearing pants that I bought in November of 2006 (Black Friday shopping), but never wore a single time, because they were too small when I bought them and I'd only gotten bigger since then.

There's kind of a story behind both articles of clothing. First the shirt. Back in the summer of 2001, I was coming to the end of a VERY long-term relationship. I was having sort of an identity crisis. My life had been defined by my relationship for so long that I never really had a sense of "me". During the spring and summer of 2001 I lost a lot of weight. Probably 25-30 pounds. I don't know what my start weight was, but I know that my low weight by August was 165. That's the thinnest I've been in my adult life. During this whole attempt to reinvent myself, I did sort of a makeover with my sister. We went out and got my hair cut, I got cute new glasses (same style I still wear now, instead of giant wire frames), and I bought a bunch of new "stylish" clothes. This shirt I'm wearing today was one of the shirts I bought back then. It's just a little lavendar button-down with 3/4 sleeves and a little bit of curve to it, so it's a pretty timeless style. I can't believe that I can fit into it right now at over 200 pounds.

The pants. I bought these pants the day after Thanksgiving in 2006. It was my first Thanksgiving with Dan's family. We went to visit his grandparents in Reading, PA, which has an outlet mall. We went to the outlet mall with Dan's mom and I tried on some clothes. I tried on these pant which are an 18 (but a REALLY small 18) and I was too embarrassed to have his mom know that an 18 was too small on me, so I bought them. How sad is that?!?! I hung onto them, hoping that I'd lose weight eventually and be able to fit into them. And here I am, nearly 4 years later, wearing them for the very first time.

They really are a SMALL 18 though! I first fit into size 16 jeans over 10 pounds ago and these things are still kind of tight on me in the waist. What the heck?!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHELLYGON321 8/15/2010 8:13PM


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ONLY1TAN 8/15/2010 7:27AM

    Whoo Hoo moment! Keep it up!!

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MOMMIE2TWOGIRLS 8/15/2010 1:14AM


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CADYANN1 8/14/2010 9:52AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LOOZINITNOW 8/14/2010 8:05AM

    Yeah for exercise and your new hot toned shape! emoticon

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FITWIFEY86 8/13/2010 9:24PM

    emoticon emoticon

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SCMAMAJONES 8/13/2010 9:21PM

    That is so awesome!!! Keep up the hard work!

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RUNNINGOLLIE 8/13/2010 5:44PM

    Great job!!! You might weigh more then before when you wore these things but with all your exercising and eating better you body must be forming a new shape!!!!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Fun Facts (for me anyway)

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

I love statistics. I'm a sucker for trivia. So, I've decided to put together some fun facts about my Spark journey so far. You might not find them as interesting, but this blog is mostly for me!

- On average, I have lost 1.816 pounds per week.

- My biggest loss was the week of 3/2-3/8 when I was deathly ill and lost 7.4 pounds.

- My biggest non-sick loss was my first week on SparkPeople when I lost 4.5 pounds.

- My next biggest loss after that was the week of 3/30-4/5 when I lost 3.6 pounds. That was also the week I hit my 40 pound loss mark.

- I have only gained weight one week. The week of 4/13-4/19 I gained one pound.
The day before that weigh-in I had 3,605mg of sodium.

- Losing my first 10 pounds took 4 weeks.

- Losing my second 10 pounds (20 pounds total) took 6 weeks.

- Losing my third 10 pounds (30 pounds total) took 5 weeks.

- Losing my fourth 10 pounds (40 pounds total) took 4 weeks.

- Losing my fifth 10 pounds (50 pounds total) took EIGHT weeks!

- Losing my sixth 10 pounds (60 pounds total) took 7 weeks.

- Losing my seventh 10 pounds (70 pounds total) will take 5 weeks, I hope!

- I have tracked every single bite I've eaten every single day since Nov. 23, EXCEPT for my birthday, March 28.

- I have logged 16,980 fitness minutes. That's 283 hours. That's nearly 12 DAYS.

- The most calories I've burned in a single month was 20, 706 in January.

- The fewest calories I've burned in a single month was 3,874 in April.

- The most calories I've eaten in a single month was 55,156 in June.

- The fewest calories I've eaten in a single month was 46,603 in December.

- I've made 162 blog posts, including this one.

- This is my 262nd day on SparkPeople.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CADYANN1 8/11/2010 4:41PM

    Love it! Isn't it amazing when you add it all up like that? My favorite one was the 12 days' worth of fitness minutes. Incredible!

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HEALTH-E-CLARE 8/11/2010 3:42PM

    emoticon Congrats you are doing amazing!

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RUNNINGOLLIE 8/11/2010 3:30PM

    Thanks for sharing! Love "just the facts" about stuff!!!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LOOZINITNOW 8/11/2010 3:23PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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REMEMBER2BME 8/11/2010 2:54PM

    This is outstanding. Killer job! So very impressive!

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RUNNER_TIFF_07 8/11/2010 1:58PM


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13-1GIRL 8/11/2010 1:48PM

    Awesome blog!! WAY TO GO!! emoticon

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KIMMAS82 8/11/2010 1:47PM

    Very interesting!! I love facts like this too!! ESPECIALLY if I can compare my own stats against themselves like you've done here!!!

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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I had a dream this morning that my sister-in-law, Becky, was still alive. Her death this past November is what inspired me to begin my weightloss journey. When times are at their toughest, it is still thoughts of her that keep me pushing through.

In this morning's dream, she was still alive, but I was still on my Spark journey. My weightloss was inspiring HER to lose weight and she was asking me all sorts of questions about the SparkPeople site and the tools and methods I'd used to lose nearly 70 pounds.

When I woke up and realized it was just a dream, I briefly had the nagging thought that if only I had started this journey sooner, maybe I could have inspired her to change her lifestyle and she would still be alive today. I realized quickly that sort of thinking would get me nowhere fast, but I do still think there is a lesson to be learned from my dream.

If you have people in your own life who are morbidly obese, do your best to inspire them and spread the Spark to their lives. Don't pressure them, but if they express any interest in your weight loss, encourage them that they could do the same. Take the time to answer all of their questions, show them around the site, explain all the tools and social support. Be patient with them and do everything you can to save them.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MESSENE 8/11/2010 8:36AM

    emoticon emoticondream! It sure has so much meaning. Your sister must be so proud of you! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LAURLEW 8/10/2010 10:14PM

    Really good blog! My mom is overweight and I wish I could get her on this with me. I told her all about Spark and I'm pretty sure she hasn't even looked. She claims she wants to lose weight but she has made zero effort. I feel like you're right that we should tell people they can do it too before they get to an unhealthy point but we also shouldn't feel bad if we can't really get them to listen. People will only do this for their self when they are ready too.

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FITWIFEY86 8/10/2010 7:44PM

    Loving this blog!! emoticon emoticon

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WEIGHTING4BABY 8/10/2010 7:02PM

    Thought provoking!!

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13-1GIRL 8/10/2010 6:31PM

    Jaime, you are such an inspiration!! Your SIL would be so proud of you!! Way to go.... nearing ONDERLAND!!! Do you use the SP guidelines for eating?((hugs))!! by the way, yay California!!

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LINDY2202 8/10/2010 6:27PM

    I loved this blog, but am so sorry for your lose. emoticon

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Moment of Triumph

Saturday, August 07, 2010

Today I ran a mile on the treadmill. I've been doing that a lot in recent months, but today was the first time I ran a mile straight without walking!!!! I am so proud of myself! I called Dan downstairs so I could tell him right away and I started to cry as I the words came out of my mouth. Once I was done with the rest of my workout I even called my parents to tell them. Who knew doing something as "simple" as running a mile could make me so happy and accomplished?

I didn't even set out to run a mile straight. I've been working on C25K week 5 and the workout I've been doing is run 5 minutes/walk 3 minutes. Well, I was getting close to the end of my first 5 minute run and I thought to myself "you know, I think I can go longer." Then I was at 7 minutes and beyond and I thought, "I wonder if I can do a full mile!" The last couple of minutes were pretty tough. My heart rate was up to 180. But, I didn't want to get THAT close and give up, so I pushed myself and finished it out!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOOZINITNOW 8/9/2010 3:38PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SCMAMAJONES 8/9/2010 11:55AM

    WOW!!! That is BIG!!! I am so proud of you!!! I need to push myself to run more, but I get impossibly out of breath after only 1/8 of a mile. Then my walking is so slow after that it's almost impossible to keep going.

That is great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! emoticon

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MORNING_NOONAN 8/8/2010 11:35AM

    Congrats that is a huge accomplishment!!! If I were you I would be shouting my achievement out my window to tell the whole world (though the neighbours would think I was crazy!!)

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PIPERZ 8/8/2010 9:43AM

    Congratulations! That's a major milestone.

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MISCHELLEK 8/7/2010 10:56PM

    That is awesome! I am walking 3 miles in 60 minutes. I wonder if I could run? I need some serious athletic bras first!

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ONLY1TAN 8/7/2010 10:31PM

    You are truly killing it! Keep it up!!

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TADTURC 8/7/2010 10:25PM

    Huge triumph! CONGRATS!!!!!

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BYEBYEFAT. 8/7/2010 10:25PM

    SOOO EXCITING! i remember when i was doing the c25k.. and could run that mile the entire way through.. SUCH AN AWESOME ACCOMPLISHMENT! congrats!

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FITWIFEY86 8/7/2010 10:14PM

    emoticon emoticon Keep up the emoticon work!!! emoticon emoticon

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JACKKELL 8/7/2010 9:56PM


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Am I Becoming What I Hated?

Thursday, August 05, 2010

When I first began my Spark Journey, I weighed 270 pounds. I started exploring the Spark site, success stories, teams, blogs, etc. I came across people a LOT smaller than me struggling to lose weight and I would think things like "you have it so easy, you only need to lose 20 pounds." Or I'd see people who had lost 100+ and think to myself, "well it must just be easier for them."

Now I have lost nearly 70 pounds and I am almost to Onederland, I can't help but think there are some people in my life who think the same things about me as I once thought about others. "If you've been able to lose 70 pounds in under 9 months, it must be easy for you." Or "you only weigh 200 pounds, you don't know what it's like to be pushing 300." I feel like I have to be careful about who I complain to and what I complain about when I'm feeling overwhelmed that I still have 45-50 pounds to lose or when I'm unhappy with the way I look and how "fat" I still feel. I'm afraid that people will secretly be thinking to themselves that I have no right to complain. And the reason I worry that others might be thinking those things is because I had those exact same thoughts about other people 9 months ago!

So, here is what I have to say to my past self and anyone who thinks I now have it easy: there is absolutely nothing "easy" about what I have been through over the past 9 months. I didn't just decide I wanted to lose weight and then just have it magically fall off of me. I worked every single day. I struggled with every single food choice. I argued with myself every single day about whether or not to do my cardio and/or my strength training. Do you think it's easy for me to pass on the cake and donuts my coworkers bring in? Do you think it's easy for me to sit through an entire party with a giant bowl of cheese puffs in front of me and not eat a single one? Well it's not! It's HARD! It takes 100% effort and shear mental fortitude to have that kind of discipline.

Also, I'm NOT perfect, despite what you may think. Sometimes I cave in to that nagging voice in my head (or my stomach) and I eat an entire pizza or a big juicy burger with fries. But you know what? I suck it up and move on. I don't cry about it. I don't beat myself up about it. What's in the past is passed and we can't change it. All we can do is move forward and focus on the things we can still change. I don't use my failures as an excuse to fail some more.

People often ask me now "how did you do it?" As if I got bitten by a radioactive spider and just suddenly acquired some super power to lose weight. Why ask a question like that when the answer is so obvious? I've eaten less and exercised a lot more. That's my super secret, magic solution! I didn't just decide to lose weight. I didn't just talk about it with my friends and say things like "oh, I really shouldn't be eating this, I'm so bad." I didn't put together a fitness plan, do it for one day, and give up. I actually ate less and exercised a lot more. That's the only way to actually lose weight. You have to actually DO it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Amazing blog, thank you for sharing!


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BYEBYEFAT. 8/6/2010 5:12PM

    I LOVED this blog!! You were right on, i have OFTEN said those exact same things.. "it must be easy when you have over 100 pounds to lose"..."ugh, you only need to lose 15 pounds"... I have never really thought about what it will feel like once im closer to my goal. Im sure i'll be the same way you are! Its exciting at the same time. Recognize your AMAZING ACCOMPLISHMENT!! it seriously is such a great accomplishment. I feel like losing weight is really one of the hardest things to do, if it wasnt.. we would all be in bikinis. Even the people who only need to lose a few pounds, its tough. Every pound lost should be a victory! :D

Thanks for the blog! One of my goals for AFTER i lose the weight is to be concious of my words. I dont want to be the person who complains about how "fat" they are.. because usually it is skewed perspective, and you never know how much someone else weighs. I cant tell you how many times ive been sitting there when one of my friends complains about how fat they are... (they are tiny)... "if you think your fat.. what does that make me? a WHALE?! " :D no more of that thinking! .. wow now that i just wrote a novel i think i can end this comment.. but thanks again for the blog! i loved it.

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TEMPUSFUGITT 8/6/2010 12:26AM

    Congratulations on your fabulous progress! Getting back to "onederland" is a great feeling (that I am looking forward to, but it unfortunately won't be real soon).

I have to admit that I too have been guilty of dismissing my "thinner" friends comments on their struggles with weight. As human beings, we want to believe our own struggles are more "heroic" than everyone else's. And when someone seems like they're in a better position than you are (i.e. less weight to lose), it seems unfair when they complain too. Of course this is all messed up... No one knows what another person's struggles are really like.

Best wishes on your continued success! emoticon

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WHITNEYFL 8/6/2010 12:21AM


I think the same thing, and i think we all do.. when we judge other's and their weight issues.

This blog really proves perseverance pays off!!!

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KIBAISREADY 8/6/2010 12:00AM

    True words! I really enjoy reading this blog! Congrats on your success so far. Keep up the good work! emoticon emoticon

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FITWIFEY86 8/5/2010 9:46PM

    I really needed this reality check! Your blog was definitely right on time for me! emoticon emoticon

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SHEENA4S 8/5/2010 8:08PM

Great blog - there's no magic bullet - it's all blood, sweat and tears!

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SCMAMAJONES 8/5/2010 8:04PM

    One step at a time, one meal at a time, one day at a time. Whether you have ten or 100 pounds to lose, that's how it has to be done. Any other way, and it will float right back on. I'm so proud of you!!! Yes, you still may have a big hill to climb to get to where you want to be, but turn around and look behind you! You've climbed a tremendous distance so far!!!!


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CADYANN1 8/5/2010 7:44PM

    It drives me crazy when people say "Oh, I shouldn't be eating this, I'm so bad." It's like you know they aren't really committed to their health.

As far as weight loss being easy or not...I don't have that much weight to lose and it's HARD. You are right, it takes commitment to eating less and working out more. Congratulations on your progress so far!


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MORNING_NOONAN 8/5/2010 6:53PM

    You are so right!! I often had the same thoughts as you. It's not easy for anyone and everyone on this site has to deal with their weightloss or maintenance each meal at a time. Everyone struggles but you just have to keep your head down and realize that the payoff is so great it is worth it!!! Thanks for the great blog. It really got me thinking!!

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FULLOFFAITH 8/5/2010 6:22PM

    I loved this blog. I needed these exact words to be said today. Thx !!!


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BLESSING4U5 8/5/2010 5:50PM

    Congratulations. I join sparks a couple years ago and really didn't get into it. I just recently started and just trying to figure things out. I been reading peoples blog and its motivating to see how they have lost weight. You are right losing weight is not easy. I really enjoyed reading your blog. You're doing great.

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HANNAHEP 8/5/2010 5:42PM

    congratulations on your fabulous weightloss and important realizations. You are right....this journey isn't "easy" for anyone!

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