Friday, May 20, 2011
FEELING MUCH BETTER in my soul today -- had to let the rain out of my clouds I was so upset with myself and my body and all I can do going forward is TAKE CARE of MYSELF 1st on my ROAD TO RECOVERY!!!
I was SO SAD and BLUE yesterday because I had SO MUCH guilt that I can't EVEN TAKE CARE OF my 3 yr old baby girl, couldn't bathe her, and had to WAIT until hubby came home to take care of her like that and he was SO EXAUSTED GOD LOVE HIM, he was falling asleep standing up singing a lullabye to her because I couldn't! He DID STOP from the moment he walked in the door after working a physically exhausting day himself and that made me feel even MORE GUILTY -- becuase I couldn't even vacumn the rug or sweep the floor, basic, simple things!
But I HAVE to LET THAT STUFF GO and CONCENTRATE on myself ... I'm asking my mom-in-law to help me out more, like washing my dishes ...I HATE TO ASK, MAKES ME FEEL SO HELPLESS BUT I MUST LEARN!!!!
TOOK CARE OF MYSELF this morning -- did my strength training and iced my knees up and took some advil so physically I feel a litte better ....
SMALL BABY STEPS RIGHT?!!? THANKS TO ALL OF YOU who took the TIME to write yesterday and send me inspirational goodies ...MY RAINBOW is STARTING to come back out and I can SMILE AGAIN!!!
xoxox you ALL!!!