Saturday, October 31, 2009
I had dinner out tonight and for some reason the way the servers spoke with the customers grated on my nerves.
Maybe it's not a big deal but when a server, or waiter or waitress as they were called in past days, does something that is part of their job and a customer says, "Thank you," a polite response would be "You're welcome" or "I'm happy to do it" or even "My pleasure."
But what answer did I hear repeatedly? "No problem."
Well, there is no reason it should be a problem, it's part of the job for gosh sakes.
Then there's the question, "How are you guys doing?" To me, when a woman is part of the group, the reference to guys is inappropriate. How would it be perceived if a group of guys was asked, "How are you girls doing?" A simpler question would be, "How are you?"
And, when customers were asked if they wanted another beverage, the question overheard was, "Do you want another..." instead of a more pleasant, "May I bring you another..." or some such phrasing.
It's not only restaurants where this occurs, especially the "No problem" response and the reference to guys. These are becoming the norm.
What I wonder is why did we allow this to happen? Where have common courtesies and manners disappeared to?
Am I expecting too much? Am I too old-fashioned? If it's not a problem :), I'd appreciate reading your views, for which, in advance, I will say, "Thank you."
Friday, October 30, 2009
I've been reading a mystery titled "Wind Spirit" by Aimee and David Thurlo. The story's main character saves a young boy from an abandoned mine shaft but in the process is briefly buried under sand. She is saved but is forever changed.
In one chapter, she and a friend meet for lunch. "You know," the friend said, "hearing about what happened to you at those mines was a real eye-opener for me. Deep down we count on having lots of tomorrows to catch up on all the things we've sacrificed for our careers. But we may never get them before it's our time to check out. Death doesn't play fair."
That statement startled me and made me wonder how many tomorrows are left. How many things have been left undone? How many words have been left unspoken? What if this is our last tomorrow? What will I want to have done and said?
The things undone are numerous, but nothing significant except to complete my books.
It's the things left unsaid that have me unsettled. It's too late to say "I love you," one more time to relatives and friends who have already passed on but it's not too late for those still with us.
That seems of paramount importance, not the things we should have done but the words we should have expressed. How many more times could we have said "I love you" or "Thank you" or even "Please?"
Don't ignore the rapid passing of time. Give an extra hug to someone dear today. Tell them how much you care for them.
Do it now. Tomorrow may too late. As the book's character said, "Death doesn't play fair."
Or, as the main character replies to her friend, "Putting off something you really want to do just means that you may never get to do it."
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Tonight I went to dinner at a delicious Chinese buffet that totally blew my calorie limit for the day.
Afterwards, as I ate the proffered cookie, I read my fortune: "If you're always a pessimist,consider just how futile that attitude can be."
That got me thinking about some differences between positive and negative times.
It seems that when we feel positive, abundant energy flows from us and we have a sense that we can do all things. Our conversations are livelier, we accomplish more. People are drawn to us. We are more outgoing.
However, when we feel negative, nothing seems to go right. People avoid us and we them. We feel bitter, unwanted and unworthy.
So, after some contemplation, it was readily obvious that a positive attitude is one to be desired, one to strive for daily. After all, does anyone truly enjoy walking around in a dark, gloomy haze of negativity?
But what about those times we slide into a blue mood? How do we get out of it?
For me, I realize the gifts I have been given to be able to see and read and hear and move about. I recall the wonders the world possesses, from glorious autumn mornings to the refreshing soft rains of spring, from the warmth of summer to the icy snows of winter when hot chocolate tastes so great.
I allow myself to appreciate the joys around me. I think of mountains and waterfalls and oceans. I give thanks for my relatives and friends and my online pen-pals. I give thanks, too, for the fun I have with my pets, all strays, two dogs and three cats, and the fun they have playing with each other.
I also give thanks that, despite some problems, I am fairly healthy and, I believe, possess a sound mind, although sometimes that can be argued. :)
I listen to upbeat music and let the tempo raise my mood. I clean some of the house and enjoy having done so.
I walk outside and simply sit and stare at clouds or stars in the sky. Doing so makes me understand how, in the big scheme of the universe, my problems are insignificant.
Basically, I allow the positive essence of the world to wash away the negativity. Getting out of a funk isn't always instantaneous. Eventually, though, my heart fills with peace and my mind becomes untroubled. Problems still exist, but they no longer appear to be insurmountable.
These are some things that work for me when the occasional negative mood hits.
What works for you?
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Today I saw a picture of a rainbow in a magazine and marveled at its beauty. Then I wondered about how happy the photographer must have been to capture such a sight.
That made me curious about how we project ourselves to others. Are we perceived as bright, colorful rainbows or dark, gloomy storm clouds?
Admittedly, it is sometimes difficult to be in an upbeat mood every minute of every day but, generally, how do others view us?
Be honest. are you most often a positive person? Do you look on the bright side of things? Do you anticipate happy conclusions to situations? Do you expect the best of others?
If not, why not? Sure, after a while it is easy to become cynical. Disappointments hurt. Put downs hurt even more. But do you prefer to spend time with chipper Cathy or negative Ned?
The answer should be obvious. We most enjoy being with people who build us up, who have confidence in us, who seem to put our happiness ahead of their own.
So, then, shouldn't we try our utmost to be more like rainbows that brighten the people whose lives we touch?
Get An Email Alert Each Time IUHRYTR Posts