Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Last week I bought a big bag of Doritos Cool Ranch for my little boys. I'm not a chips kinda girl. I'll eat them if I want them, but that's hardly ever. Well, since they had been sitting on the counter for a few days, unopened, I decided to open them and eat a handful. No big deal. The next night I did the same thing. And the next night. And the next night. A handful. They were really good, I guess that's why I kept going back night after night. Then one night, I was helping my 5 y/o with his homework and I grabbed the whole bag and sat down with him. I was eating and munching, eating and crunching, eating and smacking... I ate just about the whole bag except for a few more chips in the bottom of the bag. I did manage to pass a few to my son. Afterwards, I just kinda looked at the bag amazed. I started feeling guilty because I've never done that before. Then as I was putting the bag away, I realized I was satisfied. I had had my fill of chips. They were good to me. And every night when I would go back, I was just teasing the craving I had instead of indulging in it and getting it over with. Well... guess what, no more chip craving. It left once I put the bag away. I can look at chips now, the way I did before... no desire. I don't know what that was all about. But I did realize that sometimes we can deprive our bodies of things too long or too much. SOMETIMES. Not all the time. Just like cravings, if we keep fighting them, they never truly go away. But if we satisfy the craving, it will go away and it won't come back for awhile.
I woke up the next morning and got on the scale to see I hadn't lost or gained 1 pound from those chips. It's when we go back again and again to satisfy a craving that was gone already, when the problem begins. So I've learned, to allow myself the chance enjoy some things and not look at food as the enemy. I made food my best friend and my worst enemy. Now we're just associates that see each other from time to time.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
I cannot believe it took 6 months to lose 15 lbs. I tried so hard to get rid of that 2 in front of the number on my scale. It has been almost 3 years since I've seen 1 anything. But you know what? It feels like I've hit the lottery. I kept looking at everybody's spark page and I noticed that everyone was losing 20-30 lbs in 6 months. When I first set my goal, I had no idea it was going to take this long. But I kept on going. I fell off a few weeks, but then I would get right back on it. I even injured myself, but I found other ways to workout. It was hard!!! But I want this so bad. I have had to believe that I can do more than I think I can. I don't think I realized how much I limit myself in life.
I remember every Monday morning since Dec. 1, 2008 (also when I joined SP), I would get on the scale excited to see the numbers go down. Then when it stopped, I was confused. I kept talking with my friends on SP, and family members. I continuously exercised 5-6 days a week. I even had a long, long, talk with God about our agreement (see my intro). But He was quiet. Then I realized what was going on. God wanted to see how serious I was. Sometimes we say we're going to do something and we sound serious, but when the tough gets going, we bail out.
Well Praise God! I didn't bail out. But I sure as heck wanted to . So here I stand at 199 lbs, and it's on now! I am going to try harder to reach my next goal. Heck I was so focused on the first goal, that i didn't even think about another. I also measure my inches lost and I have lost a good amount since I've started.
The best part about this weight loss is that I didn't use diet pills, and diet plans. I just did what I was supposed to do. That's probably why it also took so long. I believe that this is "permanent weight loss".
Thursday, April 09, 2009
I was trying so hard to get under 200 lbs by March 16th and it didn't happen. I was so frustrated. I have never been this heavy in my life. I figured to myself, since this is not my normal body, then it should come off really easy like i see other people on this website. I am doing all the exercise, the eating, the mind-set, and it seems it's not getting me to my goal. Then, I started asking myself the real questions. How long have I been in the 200 lbs category. I believe I got here 2 years ago after I broke my ankle. Sitting around the house, can't do anything, but still eating. It took approx. 8 months to heal from the whole thing. Then when I was ready to exercise, and I did, I started having some foot problems on the same leg. Needless to say, i was retricted to do only certain activities. I could still go to the gym and workout on the machines... but I didn't do it. Then I had surgery, and this left me impaired for another 6 months. What did I do during that time??? Go back to the above paragraph-- "sitting around the house, can't do anything, BUT STILL EATING."
Hmmph! It's funny how before you know it, the pounds just jump on you. Not to mention, I went through alot of emotional problems at home. Emotional Eating. Yep! That was me. Then I began to eat on purpose to make myself feel as bad as I was feeling. What did that do??? More weight.
So then the question I now ask myself is, how long it take to put all of this weight on??? About 2 years-as I stated before. So why did I think it was going to take 2 months to get it off??? Silly me. It may not take 2 years to get it off, but this process will take awhile. I have to adjust to that and understand it. Now I'm at the point where I am accepting it. I believe I can do it.
Get An Email Alert Each Time ITSMYCHOICE Posts