ISMEME   31,076
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ISMEME's Recent Blog Entries

From triumph to heartbreak to trying to find myself.... after a pretty catastrophic knee injury/diag

Friday, June 07, 2013

I've went from the high of finishing my first half marathon, and under the time i had set for myself (finished in 2 hr 22 min) but in a lot of knee pain (a knee injury flairing even with it taped and braced) to being told 2 days later I had to see an orthopedist and likely needed surgery (after they took x-rays) by a Dr when I went into family medicine for pain in my knee that was not getting much better.... to being told a week after that (a week and a half ago from now) by the orthopedist that I indeed did need surgery to correct the mal-alignment in my knee and to shift the weight load to the outside of my knee where I have healthy cartilage. The orthopedist had also unfortunately told me I have osteoarthritis in the inside half of my knee. He ordered an MRI and a hip to ankle bilateral standing x-ray (the x-ray to determine angle of correction for surgery and the MRI to check for soft tissue damage since I was showing signs of a lax LCL).

I went in for the MRI and x-ray this last saturday and then went in to see my orthopedist a few days ago (tues)..... the tests reconfirmed I definitely need surgery, and unfortunately it is worse than he thought. The degree of bone he'd have to put in or take out is about double compared to what is typically done. :( The MRI fortunately showed only small micro tears in my LCL.... but unfortunately showed a complete grade III ACL tear and a moderately severe grade II partial PCL tear.... along with some small micro tears in cartilage (a relatively minor thing all things considering) and of course the cartilage loss and bone spurs developing in the inside half of my knee. So, along with the major bone surgery I have to have a double ligament reconstruction (the ACL and PCL)

The orthopedist also told me after seeing the test results that instead of the maybe 20 years he was hoping to put off a knee replacement for me that it may only be 8-10 years.... but I'll take it. I am considered younger than usual for the surgery they want but not really considered a candidate for total knee replacement yet due to failure rate for someone as young as me (turn 30 in 2 months). I was told that long-distance running is no longer an option for me... and that it will take a lot of work after surgery to increase my range of motion enough to bike.... lol, bring on the challenge :D I would love to distance bike if I am unable to run. It will give me something to work towards.

I've been going through a torrent of emotions the last two and a half weeks.... from triumph, to heartbreak and loss, to the watch this gonna figure it out and kick butt anyways.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JHITCHCOC 7/17/2013 9:28AM

    Hey buddy! I am a distance runner too and have had some knee issues also.
I got a second opinion and that doctor advised watchful waiting.
I got a couple of different bikes, changed my diet to avoid foods that contribute to inflammation and dropped a few more pounds.

I was also diagnosed with arthritis, and with bone spurs, etc. etc.

I hit the weight room. Upper body muscle mass could help we stay at my new low weight. And lots of ab work.

I am not a doctor, but I do know that the mind has a lot to do with healing. I decided to try a different approach and see what would happen. Watchful waiting like Dr. number 2 suggested.

Long story short, I have not attempted another marathon but I did complete a half marathon and run up to 6 miles in training with no pain.

Injuries do heal. If you do need a knee replacement so be it. But it is not the end of your athleticism.

Hang in there buddy.

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KAB7801 6/10/2013 8:32AM

    emoticon

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PONYFARMER 6/7/2013 5:49PM

    Wow, that is a lot of not so good news. I don't like to be to negative but you sound like someone who will jump back, bc you have a wonderful outlook.

I read your blog, not knowing you bc, I related to the title after just having had a major knee surgery (a left knee replacement) and I have had all that you mentioned on my right knee after an injury being thrown from a horse. I actually have a cadavar ACL and all the other stuff repaired. I am also having a right knee replacement on July 27th. Oh boy!

I love your outlook and your positive approach to a change in a sport you clearly love. I have to say when I see people running and they have knee braces on, I usually say to myself. Yep, there goes another knee replacement down the road. LOL! I am sure they keep the doctors busy and with job security with all the 5-K, half-marathons, and mud runs. Of course running is not the only knee killing sport. Soccer and football do a lot of damage to the legs, knees and back.

Keep up that positive outlook and I can't wait to see you in your new sport, "Cross Country or Distance Biking."

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LRSILVER 6/7/2013 2:24PM

    I am so sorry to hear about your knee. I hope it does not turn out to be as bad as it sounds.


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AAIEE1985 6/7/2013 1:56PM

    im so sorry~! if you need a friend to talk to im always on facebook.

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1HAPPYSPIRIT 6/7/2013 11:25AM

    Thinking of you and sending lots of prayers and positive thoughts your way! Take care!

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CAROLYN0107 6/7/2013 10:15AM

    Sorry for your injuries and osteop. On March 5, 2012 I smashed my left tibia in front and two ligaments tore in my knee as well as my artery supplying my leg with blood and oxygen. Then I fell and crushed my ulna in my wrist and also displaced my wrist. After five surgeries and two months in Hospital and Rehab I was still in a wheelchair. 3/12 months after I broke my knee I had a knee replacement. Anyway, I am up and walking. Never could run nor did I ever desire to do so!
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I also have osteoporosis, diagnosed in 2009. It had just changed from osteoporosis to osteopenia before my knee and wrist break but I'm sure a scan would show me back to osteoporosis.
You are young. I am 63 y.o., almost 64. Do the rehab..... to get your knee to bend correctly so you can use a bike. I never could get my knee bent enough to do so but I had a lot of swelling due to all the trauma with five surgeries on my leg.

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Congratulations for finishing your half marathon!!!

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LAREINEFROIDE 6/7/2013 8:33AM

  Sorry to hear this Kat. My thoughts and prayers will be with you as you undergo this surgery, and wishes for a speedy recovery. I have seen your determination. I know you will find another goal to set that you can achieve and go after it. For now, take it easy and do what the doctors tell you! *Hugs*


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CHRISTINECAN 6/7/2013 8:29AM

    My heart goes out to you; I was told a couple of months ago that running is off the table and it was such a blow. Perhaps this is not the time to hear this, but there are alternatives out there. It just takes time to adjust to the diagnosis.

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BESSHAILE 6/7/2013 6:51AM

    Yeah - the grief process for serious injuries is just like the grief process for a death or the end of a marriage - but we do move on and we can - and do - build great lives after grief. Sounds like you are already picking up the pieces.

Stay strong.

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KABMPH 6/7/2013 6:43AM

    I am so sorry to hear this news. Surgery is always scary. You will find something new to challenge yourself with once you heal. But please be good to yourself and your body and do the right things! Best of luck to you, dear girl. Hugs!

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KATHIC2 6/7/2013 6:40AM

  I had very similiar surgery in 2004. I would be glad to answer any questions you have. You can have a very active lift post surgery. Do your rehab and you will be on the mend sooner than it seems!

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The journey of losing 95 pounds and reaching my goal weight!!

Sunday, January 13, 2013

I am still trying to process the fact that I am at goal weight, and no longer need to lose weight. I am down 95 pounds, several jeans sizes (from a tight 18 to a comfy 2), 41.5 inches (and didn’t start taking measurements until I had already lost 20 pounds) and am now in a healthy BMI and weight range. I have gained the ability to run again, lift heavier weights, do zumba for over an hour and not feel like I will die.

So what does it look like to lose 95 pounds while being 5'0" tall? The starting pic was taken about the week before I started back on SparkPeople this time (mid-March 2011). The current pic was taken about the time I hit goal weight (within a week to week and a half).


Another set of starting and goal weight pics. This starting pic was taken a few months before I started back on SparkPeople, but was approximately the same weight as when I started. The current (goal weight) pic in this one was taken this New Year's Eve as I was getting ready to go out with a friend (lol, my hair was not done yet).


However, besides gaining my physical health back, I have gained so so much more. I can run up a flight of stairs without being out of breath. I’ve gained a ton more self-confidence. I’ve stopped accepting being put down and being treated poorly. But most importantly, I’ve learned how to love myself. I had a friend point out to me how mean I was being to myself. I remember her asking if we would let someone else be that mean to us. Sad thing is, I used to let people put me down. But, her asking that made something “click” and I stopped allowing others to treat me poorly and also stopped putting myself down. This also became the huge turning point in me learning to love myself.

This is a favorite pic of mine, from shortly after I realized how mean I had previously been to myself, and was learning how to love myself. I remember the feeling of realizing that I could fit all of me in one pant leg of jeans that used to be tight on me at my starting weight. I started giggling as I hopped across my apartment to get my phone while trying not to fall face first into my carpet.


The most common questions I get now are how does it feel to be at goal weight and how did you lose so much weight. How does it feel to be at goal weight? Amazing, overwhelming, mind-blowing… only to name a few of the many things I’m feeling at the moment. I was pretty much numb and in shock when I saw 124.8 on the scale (below my goal weight of 125). I took a picture of the scale, sent it to an amazing friend, and got a phone call from her almost immediately (before I even had a chance to sit down) with her squealing in my ear. :)

I did not have my major reward planned until about 4 ½ months before reaching my goal weight, to have an amazing friend, that I actually met through the SparkPeople Live meetings when they were being held, come visit for New Year’s Eve weekend. We also went on a MAJOR shopping spree to start rebuilding an entirely new wardrobe for me, one that actually fits me. :)

New Year's Eve day and night



I was also told that I should do something crazy, lol… and I did in the end. I had been thinking about getting my nose pierced since just shortly before I started my journey on SparkPeople in March of ’11, so I did Wednesday night (the day after hitting goal weight). It didn’t really hurt and I absolutely love it!! I want to eventually get a nose stud with a baby diamond in it once it has healed. The best thing about the piercing is that every time I see myself in a mirror, window, shiny spoon ect... it is a constant reminder to me of just how far I have truly come.

A pic taken the morning after having my nose pierced.


The things I have learned the most from this journey are that it is about the journey (not a quick fix) and learning along the way, to love myself, that I can succeed at what I put my mind to, and the value of commitment to myself. If I was asked when I started this journey if I would like a magic wand to instantly get me to my goal weight I would have hands down instantly take it. Now, looking back, I would not have taken it for the entire world. The journey along the way has gotten me to where I am. As others have told me, losing weight is 90% mental work. One of the priceless things I have learned along the way is that putting myself down gets me nowhere, but that forgiving myself, learning, and loving myself can take me to innumerable places in life. This journey has also taught me that by not giving up, by dusting myself off when I slip up and keep going, I can achieve what I set my mind to… a skill and knowledge that has untold value for life. I made a commitment to myself when I set out in mid-March of 2011 to become healthier. I stuck to that commitment and can now say every struggle and break-through, high and low, set-back and leap forward was worth it. SparkPeople has given me the skills to continue on in maintenance, and also taught me that even though I am at goal weight this journey is not done. This journey is a journey for life, and I am now progressing onto the next stage. I am excited for the challenges this will bring.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

APRIL_V_2 5/14/2013 2:33PM

    This blog was so inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing your journey and congratulations!

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JUDYDGENTRY 5/7/2013 1:54AM

  I just started back on spark people today. Luckily I came upon your blog very motivating for me. You are truly a blessing! Thanks for the encouraging words.

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ROSEBUD1023 5/7/2013 12:46AM

  Congrats !!!! you rock

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DROPOFHONEY 3/14/2013 6:11AM

    What a wonderful Blog Kat!!! I am so proud of you.. You have inspired many on your journey and by gosh have been one of the MOST positive people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing..

YOU ROCK!!!
and
YOU'RE FREAKIN AWESOME!!!

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PS I know this is late.. haha

Comment edited on: 3/14/2013 6:11:52 AM

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KATHIC2 1/18/2013 8:44PM

  You write beautifully. Congratulations on all your accomplishments!

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KPETSCHE 1/16/2013 1:23AM

    emoticon

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JOSIE2013 1/14/2013 12:09PM

    You look great!!! emoticon

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LILLYPILLY24 1/14/2013 11:16AM

    Congratulations - you've earned feeling (and looking!) this good! Well done!

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VITCHY-VICKI 1/14/2013 9:45AM

    emoticon emoticon

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JASI27 1/14/2013 9:01AM

    I am so very happy for you! You worked hard for that and should be very very proud! I wish you the best of luck! You look fantastic!

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ANGELA08021 1/14/2013 8:34AM

    Congrats!

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AUTUMNBRZ 1/14/2013 7:42AM

    You are amazing! :)

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CAROLYN0107 1/14/2013 7:33AM

    emoticon Congratulations Ismeme on reaching goal!!



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DRASADAF 1/14/2013 1:58AM

    Loved to read ur success story...awesome it is..

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MICKEYH 1/14/2013 1:57AM

    You are so amazing !! Congrats for your hard work and success. I am so proud of you. You are so inspiring to me. I like your idea of getting nose pierced. Your reminder of your hard work. Looks cute on you too.

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LAREINEFROIDE 1/13/2013 10:42PM

  Thanks for sharing Kat! Congrats to you again.

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MJREIMERS 1/13/2013 9:46PM

    You are so right in every aspect of your blog! emoticon You know you are a strong person and don't accept anything but the best from now on. You are worth all the good that comes to you and to be treated with respect and dignity! emoticon

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MJ7DM33 1/13/2013 8:29PM

  emoticon Thx for sharing your journey!

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CYALE76 1/13/2013 8:17PM

    What a great journey, congrats on hitting your goal weight you look amazing. Good luck with the transition to maintenance

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GOOGIE1262 1/13/2013 6:18PM

    What a wonderful story of your journey...We are so proud of you... emoticon

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DESIRENIGHT 1/13/2013 6:16PM

    I am so proud of your accomplishments - you are truly an inspiration - I am glad I got to know you over these last few months and to watch as you beat the crap out of your goal and achieved it with flying colors - again - great job!!!!



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JAM2DREW 1/13/2013 6:07PM

    Congrats! You look fabulous. Any advice for someone who has been on Sparks for about 5 years now and is still yo-yoing with the weight. I just can't seem to figure it out.


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JANIEG68 1/13/2013 5:53PM

    Truly AWESOME = YOU!

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ITSMATT 1/13/2013 5:49PM

    Hi there - how are you doing?

Do you realize how inspiring your blog is?

I'm quite impressed and encouraged by your attitude and your accomplishments. The weight loss is GREAT but it is EVIDENT that you've learned much about yourself and changed your life.

Congratulations!
R>And thank you for sharing!

Make it a great day!
Matt

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KABMPH 1/13/2013 5:20PM

    Best. Blog Post. EVER!!! Congrats!!!!!

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WACFIT 1/13/2013 3:21PM

    Great blog! Thank you for sharing. Congratulations! You have accomplished so much.
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PJBONARRIGO 1/13/2013 2:02PM

    Wow, what an amazing story! Thanks for sharing, you are an inspiration to us all. I especially loved your pictures; you in the single pant leg is priceless! Congrats on your weight loss and best wishes for the next stage in your journey- maintenance! emoticon

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ALANAF_27 1/13/2013 1:11PM

    Amazing! :)

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SRBSRB26 1/13/2013 1:05PM

    emoticon

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Goal weight!!! (95 pounds gone!)

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

Yes, this morning I actually passed just below that number of 125 pounds on the scale that seemed so elusive when I started SparkPeople in March of '11. 95 pounds gone! It still hasn't really set in, and maintenance scares me like none other atm as there is so little info out there on it that is positive or helpful besides the small amount that SP has on it. It is overwhelming but I'm viewing it as a new challenge (and those that know me know I love a good challenge). I will be writing the almost obligatory "I made it to goal weight" blog when I round up pics ect :) I also will on having a running blog series on the transition to maintenance. Any info and experiences I learn I would love to share with others to help them out when they approach and transition into maintenance as well. :)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KDJUAREZ 1/11/2013 9:26AM

    Congrats!!! So happy for you! What a wonderful accomplishment and way to start 2013! emoticon

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CANDOTERI 1/11/2013 1:01AM

    Congratulations! I know maintenance must seem daunting, but I'm at the other end -just starting - and it occurred to me that you must feel like I feel now. I don't believe yet that this massive change in my lifestyle is going to be possible. I am afraid of failure. But, you have shown me that it IS possible, that I just have to believe and put myself out there and try. You can keep this up. You proved it is possible. Weight loss is the by-product of living a better life, and it seems that you are doing it. Believe in yourself! And, bravo!!

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MISSG180 1/10/2013 8:34AM

    That is most awesome. You have good reason to be proud.

Here is one really good blog about maintaining. I hope it helps!

http://www.sparkpeopl
e.com/mypage_public_journal_ind
ividual.asp?blog_id=5072438

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KATHIC2 1/10/2013 7:13AM

  Congratulations!!!!

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FROMNDTOGA 1/9/2013 9:09PM

    emoticon emoticon
You inspire me!

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RUNNING-TURTLE 1/9/2013 4:16PM

    emoticon emoticon

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AUTUMNBRZ 1/9/2013 7:06AM

    Congratulations! :)

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LIVELAUFLUV 1/9/2013 5:47AM

    Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! emoticon emoticon

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MICKEYH 1/8/2013 11:29PM

    Congratulations !! Way to go !! What a wonderful day for you. So proud of you !!

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ADARKARA 1/8/2013 10:29PM

    Amazing! Way to go!

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NIKKICOLE83 1/8/2013 9:52PM

    You can handle maintenance. You have rocked the weight loss and approach it the same way. I have read a lo to f SP success stories who said that they allowed themself a 5 lb range in maintenance. You may consider that. No panic from 125-130lbs.

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THESLIMMERME1 1/8/2013 6:35PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MJ7DM33 1/8/2013 6:12PM

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WACFIT 1/8/2013 5:36PM

    Congratulations! You have cause to be proud. Good for you to be willing to share what you learn about maintenance. It will help keep you at goal.
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PENSIEVEGAZER 1/8/2013 5:30PM

    Congrats!!!!!!!!!! How awesome!!!!

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CECISMOMMY09 1/8/2013 4:28PM

    congrats!!! so jealous!

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THISISTHEREALME 1/8/2013 4:27PM

    that is so awesome! congrats!

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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

82 pounds gone! Then and now and the changes in between.

Saturday, November 03, 2012

The last 20 months or so have been crazy!!! I'm down 82 pounds to 138 pounds from my starting weight of 220 pounds. I have lost a LOT of inches too. My body has changed drastically and I can physically do so much more so much easier than before I started with SparkPeople in mid-March of 2011.

This starting photo was taken late the fall before I started with SparkPeople this time at a gala, at which I was presenting a poster of my research on pancreatic cancer to the general public. The current photo on the right side was taken a week ago from today, at a Halloween party with friends. The heels were fun but I'm definitely not used to wearing stilettos. :D



This starting photo below was taken about the week before I started back with SparkPeople this time, mid-March of 2011. It was taken at a meet and greet with one of my favorite bands, Apocalyptica, before their concert in town. The current photo paired with the starting picture was taken yesterday evening, close to 20 months after starting with SparkPeople. It blows my mind the differences I see. :)



Towards the beginning of October, when I was having a rough day (and yes, I do have those occasionally) I decided to put my jeans from my starting weight back on to give myself a mental boost, and just for fun I thought... what the heck, lets see if I can manage to squeeze myself into just one pant leg of the jeans. :D And to my shock, I fit!!! I started giggling and about fell over trying to get to my phone to take a picture though.



However, my journey has become about SO much more than just pounds and inches to me!! I never could have imagined me saying that at the start of this journey. Of course, I love the pounds and inches lost, but I have learned SO much on this journey. When I started I remembering wishing there was a magic way to just instantly be at my goal weight, but now looking back on how far I have come.... I am thankful for the journey I have had so far and no longer want/wish for that magic way. Without this journey I would never have learned how to make it work regardless of what life throws at me. Life happens and is sometimes messy, but that is no reason to not treat yourself and your body well. I have found that when I eat well and exercise regularly I am much more equipped to handle the curve balls that life throws my way.

I have also learned to love myself, with some help from a group of amazing people. Looking back, like most people, I have said some pretty mean things to myself. What good did saying mean things do for me? NONE!!! The world is harsh enough without me joining in! As I have learned to love myself, I have also stopped allowing others to put me down and no longer accept being treated poorly either. No one deserves to be torn down, put down, or treated only as a convenience by ANYONE!

I continue this journey with 13 pounds to go at the moment, until reaching my goal weight. I know I will reach that weight of 125, regardless of when it happens. However, my focus has shifted from just numbers to focusing on all the other changes I'm noticing within me.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMGIRL32 5/19/2013 2:45PM

    These photos are very motivating! Congrats on your weight loss. You look fantastic!

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MRSBUCKEYE 1/9/2013 1:02PM

    Awesome ... just emoticon

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PENSIEVEGAZER 1/8/2013 5:34PM

    I love this blog. I have learned many of the same things... especially about appreciating the journey and not saying mean things to myself! I'm only 1/2 way to my goal weight (but 60 pounds down) and I really appreciate reading this!

I saw that you recently reached your goal weight... how inspiring!

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RUNNING-TURTLE 12/21/2012 2:09PM

    That is just plain awesome. Way to go. You sure gave me a confidence boost. I would love to be able to one day fit both legs into one pant leg. That would be terrific. Keep up the good work. You look fabulous.

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LISA_SUMNER08 12/17/2012 4:16PM

    Amazing!!!!

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BEAUTY_WITHIN 12/10/2012 4:58PM

    Congratulations! Keep up the great work! You're an inspiration!

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RENEWME06 11/28/2012 12:39PM

    You LOOK AMAZING. Keep up the hard work!! You are inspiring!! emoticon emoticon

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KIMBOLEAN 11/28/2012 12:38PM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KJSIZZLE1 11/19/2012 11:12AM

    Amazing job! What a difference! Thanks for sharing your story! emoticon

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EMILYDOODLE 11/18/2012 10:18PM

  emoticon You look really good! emoticon

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EFFRAYECHILDE 11/17/2012 4:36PM

    emoticon

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ACTIONHEROFOX 11/17/2012 3:16PM

    emoticon

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ADVENTURESEEKER 11/15/2012 11:29PM

    Way to go!! emoticon

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DAENAERYS 11/11/2012 11:38AM

    emoticon emoticon

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OSUBUCKI101 11/10/2012 9:35PM

    Well done! Thank you for sharing your success as well as your enthusiasm! Keep up the good work. You inspire me! emoticon

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NERDLETTE 11/10/2012 7:48PM

    You are AWESOME! And so inspirational!

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BEATLETOT 11/9/2012 10:39AM

    Hope you don't mind my asking, but how tall are you? You look like a shorty like me! I'm 4'10.5". =)

The differences between the photos are amazing!!! Congrats!

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PEACOCKQUEEN 11/8/2012 3:29PM

    Wow I'm very inspired! I had a similar starting weight, and also a similar goal.. oh by the way.. I'm also a scientist ...ANd I'm a metalhead...I think we should be BFFs lol.

Comment edited on: 11/8/2012 3:29:51 PM

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PATNSL07 11/8/2012 11:26AM

    What an inspiration! You're half the size!! emoticon

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SERASARA 11/7/2012 9:49PM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MKINZNER 11/7/2012 8:44PM

    Awesome. I am starting at 236, and am working down to 135. It feels so overwhelming! But, then I get to read blog posts like yours and it reminds me that it is possible. THank you for sharing!

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STAYCXL-NOMORE 11/7/2012 8:12PM

    Very empowering blog , your story is such a inspiration ! Thanks for sharing , love it !
Congrats , the 13 pounds will be a breeze !
Stayc

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WACFIT 11/7/2012 1:52PM

    Great blog! Thank you for sharing. You have no doubt inspired many people with your story. I am one!... Also, thank you for your research on pancreatic cancer. My dear youngest brother died from it at the age of 28 back in 1992. They really had nothing to offer as hope when he was diagnosed. I pray that your research helps find a cure for this awful disease soon!...Congrats on your weight loss and on the many things you have discovered on your journey to better health. I wish you much success in all you do!

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EG8383 11/7/2012 1:08PM

  congrats you look amazing!! You're an inspiration and proof that we can make our dreams come true. Slim up, get healthy, and enjoy life more. =)

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CBULLIS1 11/7/2012 9:47AM

    You look AMAZING a big inspiration

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WHITNEYLD 11/7/2012 8:54AM

    emoticon

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DROPOFHONEY 11/7/2012 6:37AM

    Awesome Blog Kat.. You are an inspiration to everyone.. Keep up your good work...

YOU FREAKIN ROCK!!!
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MOONSTORMER 11/7/2012 12:25AM

    emoticon so amazing!

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FRECKLE10 11/6/2012 10:48PM

    great job!

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THESLIMMERME1 11/6/2012 10:35PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SHAZG321 11/6/2012 10:34PM

    emoticon

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MIATIA1 11/6/2012 9:26PM

    emoticon Nice blog very motivating and aspiring to us all....

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KIPPER15 11/6/2012 8:48PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PENSIEVEGAZER 11/6/2012 8:26PM

    This is amazing. I am learning so many of the lessons you listed. I think your closing comment about knowing you'll eventually be at your goal weight is such a healthy attitude that I would love to learn. Thank you for sharing!

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HEIDE69 11/6/2012 8:20PM

    emoticon What a great story! Can't wait to see pics from your goal weight!

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A-NEW-NURSE 11/6/2012 5:50PM

    Wow! Your story is amazing. Great work!

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FIRESTARINFINI 11/6/2012 3:03PM

    Apocalyptica!!! That's awesome!!! I love them!

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KRISTENMBATT 11/6/2012 1:38PM

    Amazing! So happy for you!

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DOUGLYE 11/6/2012 1:00PM

    Nicely Done! emoticon

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MIRFA71 11/6/2012 12:41PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
emoticon

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POLSKARENIA 11/6/2012 11:31AM

    Brilliant progress and the finishing line well in your sights!! Congratulations!

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MICNJ43 11/6/2012 11:23AM

  Great job. Keep it up.

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REGSHAR 11/6/2012 11:20AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SANDBBAR 11/6/2012 11:05AM

    Congratulations!! You look great!!

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MRSBUCKEYE 11/6/2012 10:59AM

    Awesome job ... one day, hopefully .. I'll have a happy lost weight story to tell/show also :)

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ONEATATIME3 11/6/2012 10:04AM

  congrats on your hard work. I like your pic in one side of pant. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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FROMNDTOGA 11/6/2012 8:31AM

    emoticon
You inspire me! Thanks for sharing your story.
clm

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MZKYND 11/6/2012 8:23AM

    You look amazing!! And I am not just talking about size/weight loss, your smile and your practically glowing!! I loved the pic of you fitting in one pant leg. congrats on all your hard work :))

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REMEMBER2BME 11/6/2012 7:31AM

    Beautiful blog. Way to go!!!!

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DUBLINROSE 11/6/2012 7:09AM

    You look amazing!!! Keep up the good work

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Beating ourselves up mentally and emotionally (learning to love ourselves)

Tuesday, October 02, 2012

Why are we SO hard on ourselves? Why do we sometimes say horribly mean and sometimes mentally and emotionally abusive things to ourselves? Would we tolerate this from someone else? The sad thing is, I used to tolerate others treating me like this and even called some of them close friends. The world is hard enough on us, so why do we think we need to be so hard on ourselves too?

I have realized enough is enough! I will not accept myself being so mean to myself anymore! I didn’t reach this point overnight, as many are aware of. A few weeks ago I “only” lost 0.8 pounds, but instead of being frustrated about this I decided to celebrate that loss. 0.8 pounds lost is a positive step towards reaching my goals. Also, I am not just a number on a scale!! There is so much more to this journey. Fitting into smaller and smaller clothing, seeing more and more muscle tone and definition, learning to love working out, learning to love myself….. Yesterday I noticed I have an increase in excess skin on my stomach but I am quite okay with this actually. If I would have noticed it a few months ago I know I would have been upset about it…. But I so will take the excess skin any day than being obese again. I do not want to face the same health problems that the rest of my immediate family is facing. They have high blood pressure problems, and now my dad, mom, and sister (she just got told this past Friday that she is on the verge of full blown type II diabetes) all three have type II diabetes…. Leaving me the only one w/o out it. This only reinforced the fact I am not a number!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COLLEGE_GIRL2 12/19/2012 11:16AM

  Such a great post! We tend to beat ourselves up instead of building ourselves up. Focusing on our positive traits and leaving the negative out of our daily lives truly makes life enjoyable!

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MICKEYH 11/4/2012 11:07AM

    I used to beat me up myself a lots of time and get more depressed. but not anymore.
I have changed way of thinking about myself. I should appreciate who I am and what I am doing good for myself for transforming to better me. I now can appreciate so many thing in my life and my surrounding. I have lost my ex husband in pancreatic cancer back in 2008. I was very sad and devastated back then, but when he was alive, he used to say "Enjoy the gift of life." Now I can understand what that really means.
Thanks for a wonderful reminder,. I love your blog. Take care. emoticon

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LIVELAUFLUV 10/3/2012 5:35AM

    Awesome post! We tend to beat our selves up, and we all know we wouldn't allow someone else to treat us that way (at least not intentionally!).

Thanks for the reminder!

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TRAVELISMYGAME 10/2/2012 1:16PM

    I found the following poem/story on a website (www.dwlz.com) a few years ago. It's still hanging on my frig and every time I think that I've "only" lost a pound (or less) I read it.

Only One Pound

Hello, do you know me? If you don't you should. I'm a pound of fat, and I'm the happiest pound of fat that you would ever want to meet. Want to know why? It's because no one ever wants to lose me; I'm Only One Pound, just a pound. Everyone wants to lose three pounds, five pounds or fifteen pounds, but never only one, so I just stick around and happily keep you fat. Then I add to myself ever so slyly so that you never seem to notice it, that is until I've grown to ten, twenty or even more pounds in weight. Yes, it's fun being Only One Pound of fat, left to do as I please. So, when you weigh in, keep right on saying "Oh, I only lost one pound." ( as if that were such a terrible thing!) For you see, if you do this you'll encourage others to keep me around because they will think I'm not worth losing. And I love being around you - your arms, your legs, your chin, your hips and every part of you. Happy Days!! After all, I'm Only One Pound of fat!!!

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FEMISLIM 10/2/2012 12:50PM

    Good job! You have say the words rightly and they are of great impact. Thanks

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MISSG180 10/2/2012 11:18AM

    I've often said that I wouldn't care if I weighed 500 pounds, so long as I fit into a size 12! Weight is the least important measure of our progress, but because it's one of the most concrete we tend to get really obsessed with it.

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DROPOFHONEY 10/2/2012 7:18AM

    emoticon emoticon Love this Blog.. and how true it is that we spend so much time looking for what's wrong with ourselves that we forget to look at what's good in ourselves.. :)

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YOSHIBEAR4 10/2/2012 7:04AM

  This is a very good blog! It take a long time to finally realize our self worth! I'm proud of you for not only discovering how important you are but for realizing you are more than a number on a scale!

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BRENDALA11 10/2/2012 6:58AM

    I liked your blog. It is so true that we beat ourselves up and you're right we wouldn't take it from anyone else so why should we do it to ourselves. Thanks for writing that. I really enjoyed it. It's food for thought. emoticon

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