Sunday, May 06, 2007
"Look at a man in the midst of doubt and danger and you will learn in his hour of adversity what he really is."
- Lucretius, Roman philosopher
Did you get the SP Mailer today that contained this quote? I find it interesting and quite true. When a person is placed in a situation that is less than ideal who does he/she deal with it? Do you fold? Do you run away with your tail between your legs? Do you stand up and fight and refuse to back down? What do you do?
For me I'd like to say that I'd stand up and fight. There have been times in life when I didn't. I wouldn't fight. I'd just take whatever came at me. At the time I thought I was being weak. That everything that was happening was my fault anyway so I may as well just take what I had coming to me. I was wrong. I was strong to live through it. And now I stand up for those who well they are too weak to fight. I empower them to stand up and take their lives back. I'm strong now. I don't believe the well worn, safe path, is the best all the time. I believe that the road less taken, though challenging and sometimes filled with danger, is the more rewarding. My views are not always the popular views. I make a lot of folks angry or uncomfortable with my outspoken ways. I'm glad for that. Usually if you can make someone angry you can make them think..even if just a little. If it came to physical danger, I'm fine with that too. I don't like being scared. And looking danger or death in the face can be very scary. But if you look at the world today aren't we all in danger anyway? Don't we all go to bed wondering if someone somewhere is going to finally get fed up with our Pres W and hit that red button? Fear is a natural emotional and chemical response to danger. And it's different for everyone. How you deal with that fear is what counts in my opinion. Do you run from it? To it? Or stand up and say I will let my fear control me?
One fear I have is my weight. I'm scared my health will fail due to it and I won't see my daughter grow to a wonderful adult. I won't be able to share my old age with my friends and loved ones. THAT scares me to no end. I'm fighting that now. Finally taking full action against that fear and the cause of it. I have to be honest. Today was a hard day. I woke up very early. Horribly early! But I decided to face it with a smile and energy to burn! I stepped outside and the humidity hit me. I nearly turned around and went back in. But I didn't. I went to the gym as planned. I got there and felt I was dragging a bit. Got on the treadmill and 10 minutes into I was having thoughts of "I'm not gonna make today. I'll never hit my 65 minutes." I nearly stopped several times. But I didn't cave into that feeling. I fought it. I focused on the outcome. I focused on the 13 pounds I've already lost and what it would be like to gain it back. I thought I my daughter and how she'd feel about it. I thought about my health and how I've been feeling sooo good lately. But my knees hurt today, my hip hurt, my leg muscles ached and my back hurt. I had a headache that could take down a horse. But I didn't stop. I didn't give up and buckle and let those minor aches stop me. I kept going. And I made it! I made it 65 minutes/3 miles/450 calories burned! I didn't lessen my pace or hit the stop button. I realized that all those negative feelings were just old tapes playing in my head saying I couldn't do it. And today I proved those old tapes wrong! Today I won. I may not always win. But today I won!