Friday, April 26, 2013
As of this morning, I am back to the weight that I was when I got sick and stopped really 'counting' my food. I am very happy about that because that is 17 lbs to date. I know I have more to lose but I, also, know that this time I really AM doing it. :)
I had some good news yesterday so I took my son out for supper, to celebrate. We went to a steak and rib restaurant. I ordered a small order of side ribs, with a small caesar salad and a cornmeal muffin. It was wonderful and I enjoyed every bite. :) My son wanted dessert and I knew there was no way he could order sticky toffee pudding, which I love, without me having some. Most of it, most likely. So, I told him we would go to Marble Slab and he could have a medium ice cream with TWO toppings. Of course, I had to go in and pay for it. Well ~ darned if they didn't have fresh banana, my favorite (along with pumpkin), which I haven't had in years. *sigh I asked the girl if I could have a sample AND that was all I had was a tiny bit on the end of a spoon. Boy, was that hard! My son and the cashier both told me I had a lot of will power. I felt so good ~ and I did feel empowered. :)
In a few minutes, we are off to go swimming, something else I haven't done for waaaaay too long. I did buy a bike and have been going on short bike rides every night ~ but they really ARE short. LOL Sometimes even 5 - 10 minutes. These old legs need to get used to it, without aching. But, swimming is my passion ~ so it should be great on all levels. :)
That's what's new with me. How 'bout you? Have a wonderful day ~ and weekend! :)
Sunday, April 21, 2013
It seems like a good day to come back to SparkPeople. For awhile, I didn't think I was going to come back. Or had the 'strength' to come back. It's been a long haul.
Since about Christmas time, things have been adding up or not going right and it just got progressively worse. Some days, and even weeks, were fine ~ but, overall, things just weren't right. I wasn't Sparking as much as before. Then, a few unexpected things happened around the end of March which made life even more difficult. About that time, I stopped coming to Spark, at all. Then, I got sick ~ and off program, until there was no more program. Then, the depression and the blues . . .
I haven't actually gained too much back. And I don't want to stop. So, today, being a new week ~ and there is something that I like about the number 21 that just made it seem possible. I'm still not 100%, either physically or mentally ~ but a person has to start somewhere. So, I've been 'on program' all day ~ and have a healthy crock-pot recipe cooking for supper. I'm not concerning myself with exercise today ~ I always took Sunday off, anyway. I will, maybe, look at that tomorrow.
I really want to be happy, joyous and free ~ like I was before. I will do my best and that's all anyone can do. It might be baby steps for awhile but 'whatever it takes'.
Hugs to my Spark friends.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Happy Birthday, my darling Mark!
"There is nothing better than birthday cake. It's like a slice of concentrated love with butter-cream frosting." ~ Animal Crossing: Wild World, 2005
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear" ~ Mark Twain
Thursday, March 14, 2013
I don't know how ~ or even if you can ~ keep a particular blog entry private. If I did, I would have done that with this one.
I am, actually, just making this blog so that I have a 'reminder of time' ~ at some point in the future. I used to love making blog entries but I haven't felt 'much' like doing anything lately.
I am doing the things I can, putting one foot in front of the other, trying to be present ~ in all things in my life, lately. As far as SP goes, I am staying within calories and doing 10-15 minutes of exercise daily. I know that 'somewhere' inside myself, I still care and still want to lose weight and get healthy. Although, currently, I feel none of it.
Am I depressed? Does life suck? I honestly don't know ~ beyond the usual 'some things in life always suck'. I just hope some good feelings come back to me soon. Simply 'surviving' really is 'nowhere land'/
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