Tuesday, July 02, 2013
So far so good. I had a good breakfast, A good lunch and snack, and I feel great.
Now for when I get home I plan exercise first and a light dinner.
Now for the quick joke.
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the President his daily briefing.
He concludes by saying "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."
OH NO! Exclaims the President. "That's terrible!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as he sits, head in hands.
Finally, The President looks up and asks........
"How many is a brazillion?"
Thursday, June 20, 2013
Grandpa was always talking about the good old days,and the lower cost of living, in particular......
"When I was a kid, my mom could send me to the store, and I'd get a salami, two pints of milk, 6 oranges, two loaves o' bread, and a magazine, some new blue jeans...all for a dollar."
Then Grandpa said sadly..."you can't do that any more...they got those darn video cameras everywhere you look..."
Sunday, June 16, 2013
Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He has 2 large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?" "Sand" he says.
The guard says, "we'll just see about that. Get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover it is just pure sand in the bags. The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.
A week later, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?"
"Sand" says Juan.
The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and he crosses the border o his bicycle.
This sequence of events is repeated every day for three years. Finally , Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard meets him in a Cantina in Mexico.
"Hey, Buddy", says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy.It's all I think about....I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?"
Juan sips his beer and says, "Bicycles."
Get An Email Alert Each Time IMEMINE1 Posts