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And You Ask What A Senior Does?

Friday, January 27, 2012

As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to "make a difference" in the world.
It is at these times that our hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other "seniors" who have found the courage to take on challenges that would make many of us wither.

Harold Jenkins is such a person:


THIS IS QUOTED FROM HAROLD:
"I've often been asked, 'What do you do now that you're retired?'
Well...I'm fortunate to have a chemical engineering background and one of the things I enjoy most is converting beer, wine and whiskey into urine. It's rewarding, uplifting, satisfying and fulfilling. I do it every day and I really enjoy it."
Harold should be an inspiration to us all.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEYSARAH 1/28/2012 11:44PM

    I keep reading your blogs to Dennis..he wanted me to tell you thanks so much, he enjoys the laughs very much (as do I).

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LUVSBULLDOGS 1/27/2012 10:12PM

    ;)

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IMNAHA 1/27/2012 6:57PM

    Quite an accomplishment.

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GOANNA2 1/27/2012 1:18PM

    emoticon

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GAYLLYNNE 1/27/2012 7:36AM

    Ha! That's great!!!! Thanks for the smile!

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PEGGYO 1/27/2012 7:14AM

    emoticon

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MRE1956 1/27/2012 6:09AM

    Heh, heh, heh!

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DESERTDREAMERS 1/27/2012 5:37AM

    Go, Harold!

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PHEBESS 1/27/2012 4:51AM

    Way to go, Harold!!!!!

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SUSIEPH1 1/27/2012 4:22AM

    emoticon emoticon

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TRYINGHARD1948 1/27/2012 3:42AM

    emoticon

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ARTJAC 1/27/2012 3:36AM

    emoticon

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NANT406 1/27/2012 3:34AM

    emoticon emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 1/27/2012 3:28AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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THE UGLY FROG.

Monday, January 23, 2012

An older lady was somewhat lonely and decided she needed a pet to keep her company. So, off to the pet shop she went. She searched and searched. None of the pets seemed to catch her interest, except this ugly frog. As she walked by the jar he was in, she looked and he winked at her.


He whispered, 'I'M SO LONELY, TOO. SO BUY ME AND TAKE ME HOME.. YOU WON'T EVER BE SORRY.'
The old lady figured, what the heck! She hadn't found anything else. So, she bought the frog. She placed him in the car, on the front seat beside her.
As she was slowly driving down the road, the frog whispered to her 'KISS ME AND YOU WON'T BE SORRY..'!


So! The old lady figured, WHAT THE HECK, and kissed the frog.

IMMEDIATELY the frog turned into an absolutely gorgeous, sexy, young, handsome prince.


THE PRINCE THEN RETURNED THE OLD LADY'S KISS.


SUDDENLY THE OLD LADY FELT HERSELF TRANSFORMING FROM HIS KISS. NOW CAN YOU GUESS WHAT THE OLD LADY TURNED INTO?

COME ON GUESS!



*

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SHE TURNED INTO the first Holiday Inn SHE COULD FIND!!!


She's old..... NOT DEAD!!!!!

OLD LADIES ROCK!!!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEYSARAH 2/2/2012 4:24AM

    emoticon

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GOANNA2 1/25/2012 12:56AM

    Woot, woot. Loved it. emoticon

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LUVSBULLDOGS 1/24/2012 3:46PM

    Cute

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OPALMOON 1/23/2012 10:32PM

    emoticon

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FATKAT65 1/23/2012 5:26PM

    emoticon

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TRYINGHARD1948 1/23/2012 4:34PM

    emoticon

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LITTLEWIND53 1/23/2012 12:28PM

    Cute

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GOHUSKERS2 1/23/2012 11:47AM

    That's so cute.....not what I expected....loved it.
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BATYAFA 1/23/2012 10:37AM

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TRICOTINE 1/23/2012 10:08AM

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L*I*T*A* 1/23/2012 9:12AM

    emoticon emoticon

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INFLATED 1/23/2012 7:47AM

    LOL!

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PEGGYO 1/23/2012 7:44AM

    way to go!

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MARYJOANNA 1/23/2012 5:38AM

  Surprise ending!

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PHEBESS 1/23/2012 5:09AM

    LOL!!!!!

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EUPHRATES 1/23/2012 4:46AM

    Teeheeheeheeheeheehee!
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SUSIEPH1 1/23/2012 4:26AM

    LOL!! emoticon emoticon

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Men's Rules.

Thursday, January 05, 2012

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear 'the rules' from the female side
Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched..
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as hunting, fishing, golfing, or something with wheels.


1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I'll have to sleep on the couch tonight.

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.


Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PENNYAN45 1/23/2012 8:57PM

    This seems very genuine and authentic to me.
Very funny, too!

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HIKETOHEIGHTS 1/8/2012 9:08PM

    This is hilarious! I like #1. Great blog.

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INFLATED 1/6/2012 1:32AM

    I'm a female and sometimes I have to wonder about us. Why would we accept a blouse that buttons down the back?

Were high heels invented by a woman that had formerly been kissed on the forehead?


A man labeled these rules all number one because of the saying, "When all else fails, see rule one." No wonder women are confused.


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FATKAT65 1/5/2012 11:26PM

    Very funny1

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TRULYVISIBLE 1/5/2012 11:00PM

  I like number one best, LOL.

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GOANNA2 1/5/2012 4:57PM

    Ah yes. Men eh?... emoticon

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CANDIS799 1/5/2012 4:25PM

    Ahhhh silly men!!

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SUSIEPH1 1/5/2012 2:12PM

    emoticon

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CHOCOHOLIC2276 1/5/2012 1:51PM

    emoticon

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LUVSBULLDOGS 1/5/2012 1:45PM

    emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 1/5/2012 12:49PM

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GATORJOY 1/5/2012 11:21AM

    emoticon

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PEGGYO 1/5/2012 9:43AM

    very interesting.

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ANNECEK 1/5/2012 9:38AM

    Bahahaha! emoticonCain't wait to show this to hubs! emoticon

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PHEBESS 1/5/2012 9:31AM

    All very true!

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GOHUSKERS2 1/5/2012 9:15AM

    Pretty good stuff!!

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DESERTDREAMERS 1/5/2012 9:11AM

    Loved it!

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INGMARIE 1/5/2012 7:45AM

    Funny thanks emoticon

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AZMOMXTWO 1/5/2012 6:30AM

  this is funny

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Jewish Newlyweds.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

A young Jewish couple got married and went on their honeymoon.
When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well", said her mother, "so how was the honeymoon?"
"Oh mama", she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! romantic"...

Suddenly she burst out crying.
"But, Mama, as soon as we returned,
Sam started using the most horrible language --
things I'd never heard before!
I mean, all these awful four-letter words!
You've got to take me home!!
PLEASE MAMA!"

"Sarah, Sarah", her mother said, "calm down!
You need to stay with your husband and work this out.
Now, tell me, what could be so awful?
WHAT four-letter words?"

"Please, don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter.
"I'm so embarrassed, they're just too awful!
COME GET ME, PLEASE!!"

"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset.
Tell your mother these horrible four-letter words!"

Sobbing, the bride said,
"Oh, Mama..., he used words like:
"DUST, WASH , IRON, and COOK...
"I'll pick you up in twenty minutes," said her mother.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEYSARAH 2/2/2012 4:27AM

    Funny stuff..use those four letter words all the time..in my to do lists!

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BATYAFA 1/23/2012 10:40AM

    Why didn't she say those horrible words to him? emoticon

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LITTLEWIND53 1/21/2012 1:58PM

    I agree.... 4 letter words indeed.

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NOTGIVINGUP49 1/21/2012 7:16AM

    Too cute! emoticon

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FLUTTER-BY)L( 1/20/2012 10:38PM

    emoticon

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NO_SNOW_BODY 1/20/2012 9:27PM

    emoticonon my way

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TEDYBEAR2838 1/20/2012 8:35PM

    emoticon

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SCRAPPY_RN 1/2/2012 7:23PM

    emoticon

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STRINGS58 1/1/2012 9:45PM

    tee hee emoticon

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PEGGYO 12/28/2011 6:50PM

    funny

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GOANNA2 12/28/2011 3:17PM

    emoticon

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LUVSBULLDOGS 12/28/2011 2:32PM

    emoticon

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SUSIEPH1 12/28/2011 1:18PM

    emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 12/28/2011 11:07AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NANCYRUBIO 12/28/2011 9:54AM

    Good---- emoticon

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MILLISMA 12/28/2011 9:48AM

    too funny! emoticon

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TICKLEBEE 12/28/2011 8:45AM

    this is what makes us all jewish princesses, just a litte.

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ANNECEK 12/28/2011 7:41AM

    Hehehe, I must be related!

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DESERTDREAMERS 12/28/2011 7:21AM

    *giggle*

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98 and no enemies!

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

All women should live so long as to be this kind of lady!

Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?"
Eighty percent held up their hands.
The Minister then repeated his question. All responded this time, except one small elderly lady.
"Mrs. Neely? Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"
"I don't have any," she replied, smiling sweetly.
"Mrs. Neely, that is very unusual. How old are you?"
"Ninety-eight," she replied. The congregation stood up and clapped their hands.
"Oh, Mrs. Neely, would you please come down in front & tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world?"
The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said,
"I outlived the bastards".
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LUVSBULLDOGS 12/28/2011 1:26AM

    What a cutie.

When one of the major generals from WWII passed, my mom said, well he outlived his enamies. My dad said, "Not all of them."

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INFLATED 12/27/2011 6:14PM

    emoticon

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PHEBESS 12/27/2011 5:27PM

    LOL! Go Mrs. Neely!!!!!

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GRATEFULADY 12/27/2011 5:25PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PATJ7084 12/27/2011 5:13PM

    you always write the funniest jokes emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 12/27/2011 10:01AM

    emoticon

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PEGGYO 12/27/2011 7:47AM

    Great answer

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GOHUSKERS2 12/27/2011 7:21AM

    I love it.....thanks for a good chuckle!!!

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GOANNA2 12/27/2011 6:55AM

    emoticon

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GAYLLYNNE 12/27/2011 6:54AM

    Hahahahaha, love it!!!!

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IMEMINE1 12/27/2011 6:14AM

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