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ILOVEROSES's Recent Blog Entries

Super Bowl.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

A man had 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. As he sits down, a man comes down and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.

"No," he says, "The seat is empty."

"This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting event in the world, and not use it?"

He says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Super bowl we haven't been to together since we got married in 1967."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else-a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?".

The man shakes his head.

"No, they're all at the funeral."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SENATOR9 7/20/2011 2:24AM

    Can't miss the game emoticon

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INFLATED 7/20/2011 1:23AM

    I think I would be speechless for the rest of the game, lol!

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L*I*T*A* 7/19/2011 7:51PM

    emoticon emoticon

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SUSIEPH1 7/19/2011 5:13PM

    emoticon emoticon

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DOOBRIE 7/19/2011 4:06PM

    emoticon

I love that wicked sense of humour!

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One more week till our big adventure, meeting my Spark Friends around the world!

Monday, July 18, 2011

I am starting to get excited! One more week and we're on our way!
We fly out on Monday afternoon to Bangkok and spend the night there. Then board Lufthansa flight to Frankfurt and after a 6 hour wait we fly to Edinburgh. I've booked a car and DH will drive us to Dundee. Spending the rest of the week with my two beautifull granddaughters.
Following Monday we go to Warsaw for a week. My cousin's daughter is getting married on Saturday and I couldn't pass up this occasion to see the whole family. Other cousins are coming from Israel too.
We go back to Scotland and enjoy our time with our DD, SIL and GD's. They start school and kinder middle of August, so then we go for a few days to London and then fly over the pond to New York.

I have plans to get together with Kathy, Marla, Mary Anne, Lizzie and Deb! We'll have a mini Spark Convention. emoticon
From New York we go to Toronto for a few days to see an old friend. Then fly to Chicago for a week and meet Marilyn, Trudy and Joyce!
After spending 4 days in Seattle/Olympia and catching up with Mike, my Dragon lairmate we go to Salt Lake City and the start of our American Parks Trail and thenWonders of the American West tours. I've been wanting to do them for the past 3 years and finally I will succeed. emoticon

The second tour ends in Las Vegas and that's where I am meeting with Jo Ann, Grace and Tom! From there we go to San Francisco and after a couple of days take a tour to Yosemite NP. Finish up our holiday with 2 days in SF and then United will fly us home!
I've never been on such a long holiday, 82 days! WOW!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TKAYSMILES 7/20/2011 5:03PM

    What a cool trip!!! Have an awesome time!!

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GRATEFULADY 7/19/2011 11:30AM

    Ania, We are all so excited for your trip. What a blessing!! We are looking forward to our time in Chicago. Love that you are finally getting to the NPs and your Western trip. Can't wait to connect with you once you are in the USA. Enjoy your time with your DD and DGD and at the wedding with family. That is the best. See you soon. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PHEBESS 7/19/2011 9:07AM

    Sounds wonderful! I know you'll have a terrific time with the family and friends - and who could pass up a wedding? PLUS grandkidlets!

Have the best trip ever!

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CANDIS799 7/19/2011 8:18AM

    Wow! That is a long, fun-filled trip. So glad to hear you'll get some family time, too. Enjoy!!

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DOOBRIE 7/19/2011 5:08AM

    emoticon

That is one unbelieveable trip of a lifetime - have fun! I hope the weather warms up while you're in Britain. It's been cold, cloudy and rainy just lately. Bring us some sunshine - please!

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MILLISMA 7/18/2011 10:47PM

    Wow, Ania, it's so exciting to see it all spelled out! What a fantastic trip. Now we're all really excited. emoticon

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SUSIEPH1 7/18/2011 10:17PM

    Sounds really awesome Ania ... I am sure you will thoughly enjoy it ....
Sorry to be missing catching up with you this year ... Helen had to change her dates because she is seeing three Specialists this year and having a MRI done.. Hopefully next year ..
Be Safe and have a wondeful time ... Love and Hugs Susie emoticon emoticon emoticon

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2BLEAN_N_FIT_AZ 7/18/2011 6:15PM

    I am getting excited, too!

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INGMARIE 7/18/2011 4:20PM

    emoticonsounds like a really fun trip emoticon
Enjoy

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MARYELLEN301 7/18/2011 3:23PM

    Your trip sounds absolutely WONDERFUL!! I feel like a slacker only going to Iceland & Greenland on Friday! Have a great time and take lots of pictures so you can look at them and reflect on the stupendous time you had once you are back home! Bon Voyage! emoticon emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 7/18/2011 3:22PM

    wow......what an awesome trip....
enjoy...enjoy........so cool to meet so many sparkfriends!!!
can't wait to see your pictures....
blessings and hugs.............lita

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DARUMA 7/18/2011 1:41PM

    How exciting! Let me know when you'll be in NY. I'm just a 2 hour drive away.

Also, take note that you are traveling in a westerly direction and will only be crossing the international date line once so you will lose a day. To get it back, you can plan another trip once you've recovered traveling east. I still need to do that as I "lost" a day of my life back in 1990 when I returned from living in Japan by continuing in a westerly direction taking the Trans-Siberian and going through Europe.
emoticon

pesha

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INFLATED 7/18/2011 1:08PM

    I enlisted in the Air Force when I was young, but I never left the USA. Enjoy your travels!

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*MADHU* 7/18/2011 11:35AM

    I envy you for meeting so many Spark Friends especially the Dragons...say HELLO to them from me too emoticon

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Qantas Airlines Mechanics' Wicked Sense Of Humour

Sunday, July 17, 2011

The following e-mail whizzed around the web recently...

After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a "gripe sheet", which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction.

The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the "gripe sheets" before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humour.

Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers.

P = The problem logged by the pilot.
S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.


P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KIN59VARA 7/19/2011 5:23AM

    Loved it. My dad was an airline mechanic so it was especially heartwarming.

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DOOBRIE 7/19/2011 5:06AM

    I love to start my day laughing at a good joke from you!

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GOHUSKERS2 7/17/2011 11:28PM

    My youngest son is a pilot and has a flight school and I will forward this to him. I think he'll get a good laugh out of this one!!

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GRATEFULADY 7/17/2011 8:02PM

    And are you flying Qantas when you leave on your long trip? LOL

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PHEBESS 7/17/2011 7:29PM

    LOL!!!!!!!

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SKYFROG 7/17/2011 4:33PM

    The company I work for has a business relationship with Qantas - this will certainly be a big hit around the office!

Thanks for sharing.

emoticon

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INGMARIE 7/17/2011 3:19PM

    emoticon

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SUSIEPH1 7/17/2011 2:48PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 7/17/2011 11:04AM

    emoticon

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TEASCHERTZ 7/17/2011 10:20AM

    Thank you for the chuckle this morning!

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KBEHUNE 7/17/2011 9:24AM

    That is cute!

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FCARMICH 7/17/2011 9:16AM

  oldie but goodie

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Never Lie to a Woman!!!

Friday, July 15, 2011

A man called home to his wife and said, " Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his friends .

We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so could you please pack enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and fishing box, we're leaving from the office & I will swing by the house to pick my things up"

" Oh! Please pack my new blue silk pyjamas. "

The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy but being the good wife she is, did exactly what her husband asked.

The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good.

The wife welcomed him home and asked if he caught many fish?

He said, "Yes! Lots of Salmon, some Bluegill, and a few Swordfish. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pyjamas like I asked you to do?"

You'll love the answer...




The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box ..."

Never Lie To A Woman...!!!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

*MADHU* 7/18/2011 11:38AM

    This is great emoticon

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BAKERICLISA 7/17/2011 7:18AM

    emoticon

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PEGGYO 7/16/2011 8:43AM

    Caught!

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GOHUSKERS2 7/16/2011 8:35AM

    I love it!!! Thanks for the laughs!

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PHEBESS 7/15/2011 11:19PM

    Yup!

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SUSIEPH1 7/15/2011 10:50PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 7/15/2011 10:21PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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WENDYJM4 7/15/2011 9:57PM

    emoticon

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MELIVA 7/15/2011 9:44PM

    This is hilarious! Thanks for the giggles!

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INGMARIE 7/15/2011 9:42PM

    love it.

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CATHYJR73 7/15/2011 9:16PM

    That is perfect Thank you!!

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The Bathtub Test

Friday, July 15, 2011

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether
or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"

"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."

"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."

"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want to be near a window?"

ARE YOU GOING TO PASS THIS ON OR DO YOU WANT THE BED NEXT TO MINE?
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

*MADHU* 7/18/2011 11:39AM

    emoticon

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WENDYJM4 7/15/2011 9:58PM

    emoticon

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SUSIEPH1 7/15/2011 7:48PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DOOBRIE 7/15/2011 3:40PM

    Yes, but can I have the one near the window?

emoticon

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PEGGYO 7/15/2011 2:44PM

    funny

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MILLISMA 7/15/2011 1:32PM

    One of my favorites emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 7/15/2011 10:08AM

    emoticon emoticon

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PHEBESS 7/15/2011 9:32AM

    LOL!

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KERRYRHOTEN 7/15/2011 9:10AM

  Funny

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