ILOVEROSES   196,470
150,000-199,999 SparkPoints
ILOVEROSES's Recent Blog Entries

Odd Spot #25.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Springdale Cemetery, Illinois, is trying to get more customers with a 10-event marketing campaign that includes a 5 K race through it. "We know if we get people back into the cemetery, they're going to be amazed at its beauty." Springdale's chief Bob Manning said. "Then, hopefully, they'll think of us when the time comes."

Police in Illinois say a woman was shocked to receive a python in the post. Delores Gavin said a delivery man left a parcel at the front door containing the snake, which had been bought by someone using her credit card number. The young spotted python was sent from a reptile dealer in California.

The Californian owner of a parrot that went missing for four years was delighted to have the bird returned after it was traced by sales records. The only downside, says owner Darren Chick, is the African grey parrot that once spoke English with a British accent now speaks Spanish and keeps asking for someone named Larry.

Indiana motorist Ellen Bogan, 60, is suing state trooper Brian Hamilton because he gave her a religious pamphlet asking her to acknowledge her sins. Hamilton had stopped her and gave her a ticket for speeding and the pamphlet that also advertised the radio program 'Policing for Jesus Ministries' hosted by trooper Dan Jones.

An Italian hair stylist has set a new Guinness World Record for the world's hairiest car. Maria Lucia Mugno, 44, spent 150 hours sewing the strands of human hair to both the interior and exterior of her vehicle. Despite originally winning the title in 2010, she added a further 20kg of hair to her furry Fiat.

A Latin motto engraved on a New Jersey library was thought to read "we confirm all things twice". But "Nos Secundus Coniecto Omnia" actually means "we second-guess all". Stone cutters will change it to "we encourage all".

Eighteen-time Olympic swim champion Michael Phelps has been banned for six months and dropped from the 2015 FINA world championships after he was arrested last month for drink-driving. USA Swimming delivered the whack six days after Phelps was charged with driving under the influence, excessive speed and crossing the centre line while driving. Phelps tweeted he is taking a break from swimming and seeking treatment.

A US freelance software programmer has spent $100,000-plus on his ongoing aim to visit every Starbucks on the planet. The notion came to Winter (formerly Rafael Lozano) as he sat in a Starbucks café in Texas in 1997. His website says he's visited 96% of Starbucks in Canada and the US, and also travelled overseas. His freelance work gives him the freedom to pursue his dream - so far he's visited 11,700 of the chain's 17,000 stores.

A patient fled from a hospital near Phoenix, Arizona, by hijacking an ambulance. Police chased the vehicle and attempted to pull Michael Lopez over, but he refused. The ambulance was later found at Lopez's home. He is facing charges of theft, felony flight, failure to yield to police and disorderly conduct.

An 8 year old Hawaiian boy has survived a six-storey fall down an apartment building's rubbish chute. The boy plunged down the chute after emptying the family rubbish (garbage) and landed on garbage piled up to the second floor. He was pulled out by a neighbour who lowered a fire hose to him.
emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

123ELAINE456 10/21/2014 9:45PM

  Good Ones. Thank You.

Report Inappropriate Comment
1CRAZYDOG 10/21/2014 8:05PM

    OH my gosh!

Report Inappropriate Comment


Monday, October 20, 2014

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."


In a Podiatrist's office:

"Time wounds all heels."


On a Septic Tank Truck:

Yesterday's Meals on Wheels


At an Optometrist's Office:

"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."


On a Plumber's truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed."


On another Plumber's truck:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."


At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :

"Invite us to your next blowout."


On an Electrician's truck:

"Let us remove your shorts."


In a Non-smoking Area:

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."


On a Maternity Room door:

"Push. Push. Push."


At a Car Dealership:

"The best way to get back on your feet -miss a car payment."


Outside a Muffler Shop:

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."


In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"


At the Electric Company

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

However, if you don't, you will be."


In a Restaurant window:

"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."


In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

"Drive carefully. We'll wait."


At a Propane Filling Station:

"Thank heaven for little grills."



"Best place in town to take a leak."


And the best one for last............

Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:

"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

INGMARIE 10/21/2014 11:12AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon Great ones.

Report Inappropriate Comment
GOANNA2 10/21/2014 5:57AM

    Terrific! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DESERTDREAMERS 10/21/2014 12:45AM

    These are great!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ARTJAC 10/21/2014 12:13AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
PDSLIM 10/20/2014 9:19PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
123ELAINE456 10/20/2014 9:11PM

  Cute!!! LOL!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 10/20/2014 7:11PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
GAYLLYNNE 10/20/2014 5:48PM

    These are just great slogans. Thanks!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
WALLAHALLA 10/20/2014 5:04PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
1CRAZYDOG 10/20/2014 3:12PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
MONTREALESTMOI 10/20/2014 9:33AM


Report Inappropriate Comment

A short journey along memory lane.

Friday, October 17, 2014


A little house with three bedrooms,
one bathroom and one car on the street.
A mower that you had to push
to make the grass look neat.

In the kitchen on the wall
we only had one phone,
And no need for recording things,
someone was always home.

We only had a living room
where we would congregate,
unless it was at mealtime
in the kitchen where we ate.

We had no need for family rooms
or extra rooms to dine.
When meeting as a family
those two rooms would work out fine.

We only had one TV set
and channels maybe two,
But always there was one of them
with something worth the view.

For snacks we had potato chips
that tasted like a chip.
And if you wanted flavour
there was onion dip.

Shop-bought snacks were rare because
my mother liked to cook
and nothing can compare to snacks
in Betty Crocker's book.

Weekends were for family trips
or staying home to play.
We all did things together --
even go to church to pray.

When we did our weekend trips
depending on the weather,
no one stayed at home because
we liked to be together.

Sometimes we would separate
to do things on our own,
but we knew where the others were
without our own mobile phone.

Then there were the movies
with your favourite movie star,
and nothing can compare
to watching movies in your car.

Then there were the picnics
at the peak of summer season,
pack a lunch and find some trees
and never need a reason.

Get a cricket game together
with all the friends you know,
have real action playing ball --
and no game video.

Remember when the doctor
used to be the family friend,
and didn't need insurance
or a lawyer to defend?

The way that he took care of you
or what he had to do,
because he took an oath and strived
to do the best for you.

Remember going to the store
and shopping casually,
and when you went to pay for it
you used your own money?

Nothing that you had to swipe
or punch in some amount,
and remember when the cashier person
had to really count?

The milkman used to go
from door to door,
And it was just a few pence more
than going to the store.

There was a time when mailed letters
came right to your door,
without a lot of junk mail ads
sent out by every store.

The postman knew each house by name
and knew where it was sent;
there were not loads of mail addressed
to "present occupant."

There was a time when just one glance
was all that it would take,
and you would know the kind of car,
the model and the make.

They didn't look like turtles
trying to squeeze out every mile;
they were streamlined, white walls, fins
and really had some style.

One time the music that you played
whenever you would jive,
was from a vinyl, big-holed record
called a forty-five.

The record player had a post
to keep them all in line
and then the records would drop down
and play one at a time.

Oh sure, we had our problems then,
just like we do today
and always we were striving,
trying for a better way.

Oh, the simple life we lived
still seems like so much fun,
how can you explain a game,
just kick the can and run?

And why would boys put cards
between bicycle spokes
and for a sixpence, red machines
had little bottled Cokes?

This life seemed so much easier
and slower in some ways.
I love the new technology
but I sure do miss those days.

So time moves on and so do we
and nothing stays the same,
but I sure love to reminisce
and walk down memory lane.
With all today's technology
we grant that it's a plus!
But it's fun to look way back and say,
Hey look, guys, THAT WAS US!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AMARILYNH 10/18/2014 10:43AM

    That brought back some good memories!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DESERTDREAMERS 10/18/2014 8:14AM

    emoticon Those were the days! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
123ELAINE456 10/17/2014 11:42PM

  Wonderful Blog!!!Those were the days!!! Miss Them. Thank You for sharing. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
PHEBESS 10/17/2014 11:32PM

    The chips thing reminded me of the funniest chip flavor we saw in Australia - lamb and mint jelly flavored potato chips!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GOANNA2 10/17/2014 10:23PM

    Yes - that was us. I love how we grew up. I often
wonder what our kids will find when they reach
our age. I still love receiving letters and talking
to the postman and giving a few bottles of beer
to our garbage man, and... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LITTLEWIND53 10/17/2014 10:09PM

    I sometimes feel like I'm a fish out of the techy waters and miss those olden days.......

Report Inappropriate Comment
ARTJAC 10/17/2014 9:21PM

    emoticon them were the days

Report Inappropriate Comment
HELEN_BRU 10/17/2014 5:22PM

    I miss those days! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
1CRAZYDOG 10/17/2014 3:56PM

    Ah yes . . . that was my childhood too! Simpler times for sure.

Report Inappropriate Comment
WALLAHALLA 10/17/2014 3:00PM

    Lots of wonderful memories. I sure miss a simpler life.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SQUIRRELMOMMA1 10/17/2014 12:16PM

    emoticon Those were the days.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PDSLIM 10/17/2014 10:36AM


Report Inappropriate Comment

Have you seen my mind?

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Dear Friends:

Just a line to say I'm living ...
That I'm not among the dead,

Though I'm getting more forgetful
And mixed up in the head.

I got used to my arthritis,
To my dentures I'm resigned,

I can manage my bifocals,
But Lord ... how I miss my mind!!!

Sometimes I can't remember
When I stand at the foot of the stairs,

If I must go up for something ...
Or if I've just come down from there.

I stand before the fridge at times,
My poor mind filled with doubt,

Have I come to put food away,
Or come to take some out?

There are times when it is dark out,
And with my nightcap on my head,

I don't know if I'm retiring ...
Or just getting out of bed.

So if it's my turn to write you,
There's no need for getting sore,

I may think that I have written
And don't want to be a bore.

I do know that I miss you
And wish that you were near.

And now it's nearly mail time
So I must say good bye, my dear.

Now I'm standing beside the mail box
With a face so very red,

Instead of mailing you my letter ...

I have opened it instead!!!

Author Unknown

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GOANNA2 10/17/2014 10:20PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
ARTJAC 10/17/2014 5:57AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
DESERTDREAMERS 10/17/2014 5:40AM

    I am developing symptoms! I tell people at work "I've got short-term memory ... thingy" when I forget things

Report Inappropriate Comment
LITTLEWIND53 10/16/2014 11:26PM

    Much longer than what I heard....

I can live with my arthritis,
My glasses suite me fine,
My hearing aid does what it's supposed to,
But How I miss my mind......

I love your version......

Report Inappropriate Comment
LINOVER 10/16/2014 9:21PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
PHEBESS 10/16/2014 9:12PM

    Sad but true!

Report Inappropriate Comment
123ELAINE456 10/16/2014 7:25PM

  Awesome Poem. Thank You. And how true.

Report Inappropriate Comment
-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 10/16/2014 6:17PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
HIKETOHEIGHTS 10/16/2014 5:35PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
INGMARIE 10/16/2014 2:30PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
WALLAHALLA 10/16/2014 11:56AM

    sounds familiar

Report Inappropriate Comment
1CRAZYDOG 10/16/2014 10:25AM

♥~*-:¦:-*♥~.•*´¨ )♥~*-:¦:-*♥~.•*´¨ )♥~*-:¦:-*♥
“Once we connect to the wisdom of our soul, we will see how every experience in our life benefits us in fulfilling our purpose ” Leah Levkowitz
“✲ •。* ✰ ˛★* 。° ✲。* •★ *˚。*。✰>

Report Inappropriate Comment
REBESANCON 10/16/2014 10:08AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
SOTEIRA75 10/16/2014 10:05AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
PDSLIM 10/16/2014 9:45AM


Report Inappropriate Comment

Four Retirees Walk Into A Bar....

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Four older retired men are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona.

They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents."

They look at each other and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true.

The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room,

"Come on in and let me pour one for you! What'll it be, gentlemen?"

There's a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a martini.

In no time the bartender serves up four iced martinis shaken, not stirred and says,

"That's 10 cents each, please."

The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at each other.

They can't believe their good luck. They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round.

Again, four excellent martinis are produced, with the bartender again saying,

“That’s 40 cents, please."

They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them.

They've each had two martinis and haven't even spent a dollar yet.

Finally one of them says, "How can you afford to serve martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?"

"I'm a retired tailor from Phoenix ," the bartender says, "and I always wanted to own a bar.

Last year I hit the Lottery Jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this place.

Every drink costs a dime. Wine, liquor, beer it's all the same."

"Wow! That's some story!" one of the men says.

As the four of them sip at their martinis, they can't help noticing seven other people at the end of the bar who don't have any drinks in front of them and haven't ordered anything the whole time they've been there.

Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men asks the Bartender, "What's with them?"

"The bartender says, "They're retired people from Florida.

They're waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price, plus they all have coupons..."
emoticon emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTJAC 10/17/2014 5:57AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
SUSANELAINE1956 10/16/2014 9:16AM

    Funny emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SQUIRRELMOMMA1 10/16/2014 8:19AM

    Gracious! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DESERTDREAMERS 10/16/2014 7:41AM

    Nooo! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GOANNA2 10/16/2014 7:08AM

    El cheapos abound everywhere... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PHEBESS 10/16/2014 4:12AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
HISTOGUY 10/16/2014 2:24AM

    emoticon emoticon GR8 emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LITTLEWIND53 10/15/2014 11:59PM

    ha ha ha

Report Inappropriate Comment
123ELAINE456 10/15/2014 9:42PM

  Love It. Thank You.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LINOVER 10/15/2014 8:34PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
WALLAHALLA 10/15/2014 8:13PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
1CRAZYDOG 10/15/2014 7:58PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
HELEN_BRU 10/15/2014 7:35PM

    Too much!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALICIA214 10/15/2014 7:29PM


Love it Thank You

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 Last Page