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IBSFOSTER's Recent Blog Entries

Adding exercise

Thursday, June 21, 2012

For the past two days I've gone to the gym and walked slowly on the treadmill for 30 minutes. It's not much but it is a start. I've been discouraged because I must have misread the scale before my last blog. It is not 202, it is 206. Still downward movement but slower still than I had thought. I think all the medication I am on may have slowed my metabolism because I am only eating about 800 calories per day. Maybe my fat is holding on tightly, fearing that I am starving or something.
Hopefully the exercise will burn off enough calories to make a difference on the scale and off.
I am embarrassed to go to the gym because I am so huge, and I have a tendency to focus on the most fit people there and compare myself to them. But yesterday I was noticing that most of the people there, or many, at least were shaped more like me.
And I didn't see anything "wrong" with them or think that any of them should be embarrassed or ashamed, so it's just mind game number 4702, trying to keep me sedentary.
Well I'm off to the gym anyway. Wish me luck and I hope everyone else is having a successful day!


Drops in a bucket

Sunday, June 10, 2012

I was so encouraged by the comments on my last blog that not only have I persevered with my diet but I have mustered up the courage to blog again!
I have lost 10 pounds since that writing. I have been doing some heavy gardening, but have not started working out yet, mainly because I have been too fat to fit into any of my workout clothes. But now I think I can comfortably put on some and venture out. Imagine the weight I would lose if I wasn't afraid to take my heavy body out in public to exercise!
I am determined to overcome this fear this week. My goal is to go out in public at least once and exercise. I know there is stuff I can do at home, but I used to go to the YMCA everyday and there is no good reason for me not to be going. I am just playing mind games with myself.
My beginning weight was 212 and now it is 202. Don't tell my husband! He still doesn't know how much I weigh, although I'm sure he has figured it out by now! LOL
I want to get down to 135. I am 5 feet 5 inches and small framed, so I have 73 more pounds to go. Less than the weight of my German Shepherd. But so many sacks of potatoes that if I think about it that way, I'll get discouraged. I've made a drop in the bucket. And the drops will slowly but surely add up. And the whole time I've been dieting, I've felt empowered, like I am doing the right thing for today and not living in disease mode. In late stage Huntington's Disease, ironically, one of the problems is excessive weight loss. At one point, my mom got down to 88 and we had to take all kinds of measures to raise her weight. But I have many years until I face that and it is OK for me to stop protecting myself with fat and to live in a healthy body while I am still in the early stages of HD.
I'm going to keep doing what I am doing, with the addition of the exercise and of course more water. I am encouraged by my drop in the bucket!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STUFFNEARTABOR 6/10/2012 12:03PM

    Without each drop,the bucket would not be full. You are on the right track!! Keep it up & good luck!!

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JUFOME 6/10/2012 12:02PM

    Wow! You so can do this. Congrats on the weight loss so far. I love your comment about living now, today healthy and leaving concerns about the future dealing with HD to the future. Living healthy truly is a one day at a time process. Keep up the great work! Keep taking that 'fat armor' off - one day at a time. emoticon

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It is time

Thursday, May 31, 2012

So I have allowed myself to be fat for almost seven years. I gained a lot of weight with my last pregnancy and just kept adding to it.
I need to improve the quality of my life now instead of putting it off until tomorrow. Why? I found out I have Huntington's Disease, a neurological disease that is progressive and fatal. My golden years will be tarnished with disordered movement, speech and cognitive problems, and dementia.
So now is really the time to get rid of this fat that is weighing me down and keeping me from living in today as fully as I aspire to.
This is diet day three. I am using the phone app to enter my food and water and in a day or so I'll muster up the nerve to walk around the block. I feel like I am taking care of myself instead of biding my time, waiting for symptoms to appear. I haven't felt this hopeful since my diagnosis, so I know I'm doing the right thing and I just have to stay with it.
I was scared to post this, but here goes...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATSYB7 6/1/2012 6:39AM

    I'm sorry about your diagnosis. I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through. Congratulations on seizing the opportunity to live a more healthy life now. Best wishes--your Spark friends are thinking of you! Don't hesitate to ask for support. We're here for you .

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CGARR442 5/31/2012 9:01PM

    I'm sorry to hear of your diagnosis.
It is good that you are making positive changes instead of giving up.
Take care of yourself.
I'm wishing you the best of luck!

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ROBERTSONHLA 5/31/2012 8:22PM

  You have to start somewhere! Exercise is a great coping mechanism--a walk or a run can turn a negative mood/thoughts right around. Good Luck, and down forget to lean on others for support.

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