Friday, May 06, 2011
Since last August I have been working my ass off in school and work. School has paid off, I am now part of the national honor society @ Kean University, buttttttttt my weight has suffered.
I am tired, out of shape....F-that I am beyond out of shape and completly unmotivated. I had two serious wake up calls; One was when I put on my suit to go to a wedding.....I could not breath! And the second was when I was looking as some pictures the wife took of me in the backyark with the kids.
My jaw hit the floor when I saw exactly how bad i look. It is scary how fast I put it on. My food addiction has kicked my butt, and this time really really bad. And the sad part is I am sooo tired I just dont care right now. I am trying, but not hard enough.
Getting the energy keeps getting harder and harder, it seems all the energy I have goes to everything else these days. And the times I could work out, just go down the drain.
I am coming back here to try and jump start it, I usually wait until Monday to start but I dont think I have that luxury now. I am back up to 225lbs and it makes me ill just thinking about it.
I must say this is the worst I have ever gotten. It seems as the years go on it gets worse and worse, i get in shape then get out of shape. Get back into shape get even more out of shape than the last time. And now I am back to being out of shape, becoming a shape and hating it.
I give all those credit for keeping up with their programs and giving the rest of us hope that maybe we can all use your energy to restart ours.
Ok, its May 6, 2011 lets see what I can do by the end of this month. No holds bared, once again.......la sigh
And yes I will post that picture I mention at some point, as soon as I find the courage to do so....its bad!