HILLSLUG98239   28,241
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HILLSLUG98239's Recent Blog Entries

I think it's working!

Monday, February 17, 2014

I'm still frustrated that I can't run. Well, I *could* run, but I know that would just hurt, and set me back even further. So I'm choosing to not run for a few more days. More time on the bike!

We went out to breakfast last Saturday. I got the heart attack special: chicken-fried steak with gravy, grits, and eggs. I prefer yellow corn grits, but these were pretty good hominy grits. This morning, I fried up the leftover grits and tossed them with some bacon, then plopped a fried egg on top of the mess. Not quite a heart attack, but still pretty tasty.

I checked my average daily calorie intake over the last month. It's about 2200. That's higher than the 2000 I was aiming for, but it's a start. And I'm hopeful that it's working. My weight has been the same the past two days, and it's the least I've weighed in ten years. Before law school. Before getting married. I'm hopeful I can keep this going. I won't be surprised if my weight slides back up a little, but I'm confident I'm on the right track despite the recent detours.

As usual, I went into the weekend with a list of things I'd hoped to accomplish. Most of them have not yet been accomplished. Yesterday, the Hubs & I went for a walk in a nearby natural preserve. It's in a valley, and I'd hoped it would keep us out of the wind. It didn't, but at least we weren't getting the full force of the winds. Although it meant not checking anything off my "to-do" list, it was time well spent.

When we got home, we worked in the yard. I decided to take advantage of the relatively mild weather and the previous night's rain and plant. I planted lettuce, beets, peas, broccoli, spinach, and kohlrabi. They're all cool-loving plants, so they should be fine so long as we don't get any hard freezes. The seeds are old (from the past two seasons), so if they don't germinate I won't be too surprised. I always wait too long to get the cool-weather plants in the ground, so I figured it was worth a shot at getting them in the ground early. Again, nothing checked off the "to-do" list, but time well spent.

The goodies sitting out at coffee hour after church were divine. (We attend an Episcopal Church. Unlike Lutherans, coffee is not a sacrament to Episcopalians; coffee hour is, though.) There were several people I chatted with, which means we were there for a while ... which means I ended up eating a cookie and some nutty, gooey bar cookie. Maybe that's why we went for the walk....

Today, Cheeto, our 20-month old polydactyl mitted marmalade tabby, goes to the vet for his annual check-up and shots. The vet wants an fecal sample to test for parasites. This means I need to clean the litter boxes, then watch him until he uses one of them. Oh, the glamour! It also means I need to stick around the house until this task is accomplished. On the plus side, I may get some housework done.

And so, I should get off my rear end and get to work. I just wanted to log my feelings about my weight. I have a long ways to go, but I'm feeling good about this.

  
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HILLSLUG98239 2/18/2014 9:43AM

    And today I'm back up two pounds, and my body fat went up, too. I'm not stressing, though. It's an example of why I don't get too excited by what the scale reads.

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JANROLG 2/17/2014 12:39PM

    You can do it!

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Beer Brain

Saturday, February 15, 2014

I succumbed to the box of Annie's Mac& Cheese. The kind with the package of cheese sauce, not cheese powder. Hot & gooey, salty & fatty. You're the worst thing on the planet, but sweet Jesus do I love you.

I'm pretty pleased with myself: as soon as it was done, I divided it into to one-cup servings. Two of those servings are in the refrigerator. I mixed the one I ate with two cups of mixed vegetables. So I got my hot & gooey fix with enough chewy/crunchy filler to make that one cup into a meal. Normally, I'd eat the enter thing myself.

On the other hand, I also picked up a big bottle of something called Wrecking Ball Stout. Twenty-two ounces of 9.5% stout. I've had one 30 dl glass (about 10 ounces) and, um, wow. "Wrecking Ball"? Try "Ass Kicker."

Needless to say, I'm staying off of ebay tonight.

  
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MISSG180 2/15/2014 8:27PM

    Every once in a while, it's just mac and cheese day.

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JEANINNEWCASTLE 2/15/2014 12:44AM

  LOL on the beer. Great job on dividing up the mac and cheese.

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A Glorious Affirmation of Chocolate

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

This pleases me: www.usatriathlon.org/about-multispor
t/multisport-zone/fuel-station/article
s/dark-chocolate-021014.aspx

I keep the 70% stuff at work because it's soft and comforting. At home, I'm more inclined to go with 80-90%. I've had 95% cacao chocolate. It's dark, complex, and a little challenging. I love it!

I'm good about limiting myself to about an ounce a day. I don't currently have any chocolate in my desk; this article may inspire me to correct that. emoticon

  
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EBRAINK 2/12/2014 8:25AM

    Yay, chocolate!

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Dodged a Bullet (figuratively)

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Yesterday was just one of those days. I had this gnawing hunger. Eat-everything-in-sight hunger. Hunger that would not be distracted by drinking water or tea or by getting up and walking around. I ended up eating about 2700 calories, well beyond my allotted 2000. Shrugged my shoulders, gave myself a Leroy Jethro Gibbs-worthy slap to the back of the head and said, "I'll do better tomorrow."

On the plus side, it was a fairly healthy binge. Bacon, made-from-scratch sourdough pancakes with homemade (and low-sugar) blackberry jam for breakfast. Lunch was roast beef on homemade sourdough rye with cottage cheese, horseradish, and lettuce, a salad with real (as in only a handful of ingredients) blue cheese dressing. I'd had a banana as a snack earlier. At some point I ate my sample Quest bar (the only processed food I ate all day, and it's pretty healthy for precessed food), an apple, a half an ounce of raisins combined with a half an ounce of plain almonds. I ate my yogurt-agave syrup-flax seed blend with granola (ah - that's processed food, too). I've trained myself to only eat a half a cup of the yogurt at a time because although it's very nutrious, adding the flax seed makes it a little too calorie dense for a snack.

I also succumbed to little Butterfinger heart one of my more evil co-workers has left scattered around the office. (It's about half the size of a "fun size" candy bar.)

I was planning to go to the gym and alternate between the treadmill and the rowing machine. My ankle was really bothering me last Sunday (after the hike in the snow). It didn't feel all that great yesterday, so I finally gave up on going to the gym. emoticon But I ate my homemade Allen Lim rice cake anyway because I didn't want to be starving when I got home. (These rice cakes have bacon and egg in them, so they're not pure rice. Pretty nifty when you're need a boost.)

The premptive rice cake didn't stop me from having two cookies when I got home.

I let The Hubs make me dinner: a steak, homemade scalloped potatoes, broccoli. I had a small portion of the steak (about 3-4 ounces) and only a cup of the potatoes, so it wasn't horrible. And, other than a ridiculously high sodium intake for the day, it was a pretty healthy day. It was just TOO MUCH FOOD.

Tonight I will go to a Group Ride. I think the spin class will be good for my ankle. Yes, it will have to flex, but that will help loosen it and get some good blood flow. Even though I'll be standing on the pedals, it's not the kind of pounding stress running would be.

I did avoid the candy temptation all yesterday morning and again this morning. That's a victory. I didn't even bring yogurt with me today, so it's not calling my name. I have another rice cake, which I will eat in the late afternoon or after the Group Ride class.

But - the "dodging the bullet - I forgot about that. Despite the 2700 calories I ate yesterday, my weight was the same this morning as it was yesterday, and my body fat percentage went down. The body fat percentage is a decent gauge of how hydrated I am. If my weight goes down but my body fat percentage goes up, I know I've lost water. (I view both measurements with a jaded eye.) So I'm pretty happy about that. It's not something I should repeat, but it hasn't done any real damage.

And I will continue to do better today.

  
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PROPMAN1 2/11/2014 3:41PM

  It's another day so...do your best.

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Back to Wallowing in Self-Pity

Wednesday, February 05, 2014

I was so happy last week that I'd finally kicked that cold. Went for a 6.5K run on Saturday. That may have been too much, and it probably didn't help that I ended up driving 500 miles this weekend instead of doing some easy activity to help my muscles relax.

Monday morning, as I got out of the car, I felt my lower back seize. It's not really painful; it's more like someone wrapped me up in duct tape. Everything feels tight. I have that weird old-person walk: it's uncomfortable to move forward by bringing my knees up (using my quads/flexors primarily), so I'm kind of shuffling along with these little baby steps. And my posture looks really stiff.

The weather has turned. We're having "unseasonably" cold weather. Heck, it's winter: what other season has single digit temps? And it's been windy. I could handle the cold if it was just the cold. I can't handle 15 and 25-mph winds.

I may try a Group Ride class tomorrow night, after my follow-up visit with the chiropractor. Monday, he said I was the tightest he'd ever seen me be. After another adjustment tomorrow, I'm hopeful the spin class will help my back relax. I'd love to be able to run this weekend, but I'm going to play that one by ear.

So I'm really being a crybaby about all this. I've been consoling myself with treats. It's not overboard - a "fun size" candy bar one day, half a cupcake another - but because I'm not working out I certainly don't need the extra sugar & fat. And I'm crabby, because I haven't been to the gym since Friday. (I was thinking about swimming, but the lap pool is kind of chilly. Not sure my back will enjoy exercising in that.)

Times like this cause me to exagerate my self-described "can't win for losing" cycle. Often, I will get started on the right track, and then something derails it. Work blows up. I get sick. Saddle sores. Weather doesn't cooperate. Too many meetings. It doesn't happen everytime, but when I'm wallowing in self-pity, I don't view history with a clear lens. So I boo-hoo and whine about how the fates are out to get me.

The thing is, this - like every detour - is temporary. It's a detour, not a derailment. My wheels are not off the tracks, they're just a little off course. I don't get to control the road ahead; I can only control how I react to its twists and turns (and occasional detours). So while I'm complaining, truth be told, I kind of enjoy this wallow in self-pity. Sometimes the detour serves the purpose of giving me a break I didn't know I needed. I'm getting blown off course for a week, not months. DWI, Kim - deal with it.

But I'm still going to whine.

  
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THINFITFEMINIST 2/9/2014 5:13PM

    We all are attracted to self-pity but don't admit to it. Thank you for your honesty. You are right you have had a little detour and honestly I don't think it's going to last.

Sometimes when I need to vent and ready to blow I start shouting things out in my car, in the shower, on my walk, at my cats (they go and hide), and I do feel better afterwards.

Life is a journey of detours.

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SPEEDYDOG 2/9/2014 1:19PM

    Hi Kim,

I know how frustrating a little pain in the back can be. You may need to take it a little easy until you feel better.

It is OK to be a crybaby and temporarily wallow in self pity.

Thanks, Bruce

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EBRAINK 2/6/2014 8:35AM

    This: "The thing is, this - like every detour - is temporary. It's a detour, not a derailment. My wheels are not off the tracks, they're just a little off course. I don't get to control the road ahead; I can only control how I react to its twists and turns (and occasional detours). "

Detours are part of the journey, too. It's only when you wallow around in them and forget truly where you're going that you can say that you're "lost" or that you "lost direction".

What did you get from this detour? Confirmation of something you already knew - take it slowly while bouncing back from having a bad cold that kept you away from exercising. Also, that whining is part of the process for getting out of a detour - because (I'm going to go out on a limb here) you don't seem to like being a whiner, much. So (I think) the unpleasant self image of being a whiner (even though you've got good humor about it and you certainly made me laugh) helps you get back on track. I suspect that even though you worry about getting completely derailed or knocked off course, you know you haven't been - instead of spiraling out of control into a pit of "never going to get out of this" despair, you're recognizing it, naming it, whining a little, joking about it...and getting back on track.

So. Keep plugging away. No one said it would be easy.

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MRSKATEDUVALL 2/5/2014 8:46PM

    OUCH. Your body is telling you to take it easy. The weather is telling us to make a crock pot of something healthy and stay inside.

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MISSG180 2/5/2014 3:39PM

    I have so much sympathy for your "one step forward, two steps back" situation. It seems like every time I start to get some momentum, something comes along to knock me back down. It's frustrating, but we keep plowing forward.

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