Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Here is my disclaimer. If for religious or personal reasons you find talking about sex offensive. Don't say I didn't warn you
So after 3 months on SP and losing 65 lbs I think the thing that has shocked me the most is how much the weight loss changes your sex life. Now I have never been shy about sex and even at my biggest I didn't hide from my fiancÚ etc. This isn't going to go into graphic details or anything, don't worry, some things are sacred and my fiancÚ is pretty conservative in his feelings about how much you should share with other people. At my biggest I did have insecurities about my size and I used to shower 3 times a day because I was so paranoid I would smell bad but it didn't stop me from enjoying sex. There were times like I felt my own stomach was making it difficult to breathe and limited me in my abilities and I had pretty much resigned myself to the idea that this was how it generally was going to be for me.
I can say, just 65 lbs later, this should be a huge motivator for everyone. Not only has my self-confidence skyrocketed but our sex life, which wasn't bad to begin with, has improved so much just from my ability to move around more. I hope this isn't freaking people out but I really can't believe how much things have changed. For a long time I felt like being tired all the time and being unathletic was my fault and that we had to limit our intimacy because of my own inability to deal with my own issues. He could barely hug me because my fat kept me so far away from him. I can remember times when he would try to snuggle me and I would feel like I was suffocating and I would have to move away. These aren't issues for us anymore. I am still big and have a long way to go but I am not losing out on basic human pleasures anymore as a result. I can walk around the park, go dancing, have sex, go shopping and enjoy all the things I have wanted too for so long. I used to choose food over living my life and I can say now, and for the rest of my life, I am going to choose me. Sorry food issues, you are done.