Sunday, December 30, 2012
Hi sparkers... have had a good day and actually today and yesterday eve have been regular days, no sad sack here. Which is highly irregular and so welcome. We took dad with us out for breakfast, and other than walks with allie we have been home. Well my walks, lol not hubby although he did shovel the driveway, he still isn't feeling well.
So been thinking what I can do that is different from any other year, or else how can I sustain any of my new ideas. It isn't so much doing it is sustaining. For instance I am craving choc. right now, well there is choc here but on the first I was thinking what can I have... I want to get sugar out.. I have done pretty well with flour for the most part and even more so want sugar to not have such a hold over me.
I also have to keep exercising, I am doing well with Allie being my walking partner although she must learn to heel better as when she pulls it really hurts my back and have been getting odd little sciatica pain in my R butt. NOt what I need at all. I don't want to resort to a haltie or gentle leader, I want her to be able to walk properly at any time.
But I need to get on the strength training bandwagon, I wish I could afford a personal trainer to help me or that my sil would do it or take me seriously. I think she is still too self concious to do it with or for family. I know there are tons of short ones on here and I will have to check them out and print them off. Also I have a book of them, and also a small pamphlet of stuff for bad backs and knees so can use them .Continue to do the knee strengthning stuff for pre surgery. EEEK.
Okay well going to go upstairs and continue sorting in craft room, so much stuff and got the table, large bookcase, and paper holder bookcase cleared. Not doing the closet. lol
Then have a few things to move in my exercise room and get the pump for my ball and will be good to go.
I started back to drinking 1 of my water bottles so will be back to 3 a day jan 1.
But have to get a plan. I will think and write. I got a binder with blank pages and also a small notebook. I want to keep track of food not only for cal. reasons but cos dr said to see if I can figure what was causing the pain in my belly. Haven't had it again and eating the same things.
Okay off to do a bit, and get ready for tomorrow. I hope to go to the mall, find a warmer hat, adn waterproof mitts or gloves on sale. Otherwise not sure what we are doing, Oh going out for breakfast tomorrow just hubby and me for my birthday at Coras as they have fruit and we have gift cert. from ds and dil. Kids will be over at some time, at least dd will as not sure what ds has to work and he hasn't been well again, called in sick day before yesterday as thought that kidney stone was passing but figures not yet. Geesh.
Hugs and cya in the am!!! I am going to have a plan! lol SMART goals. I know.
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Well I must say I have had a good day. Even though I have been very introspective, I haven't broken down or gotten melancholy. Thanks to some spark replies, spark messages, I again feel as if I am doing okay and don't always have to be looking for a huge"purpose" in my life.
But for now, I am going to go do some stretches and then going to go soak. I wish I used my sauna more, but I hurt to sit in it as it is a one person and I have to sit up pretty straight which really bothers my back. I have such poor posture, that is one area that I was weepy, Saw myself in the mirror side on and what a dowagers hump I will get if I am very very soon not careful. I seem to slump cos my lower back feels better, but when I do my B,D,C,C I feel so much better. That is my short form for hold shoulders BACK, let them rest DOWN, CROWN of head up, and CORE. but since having poor posture since getting breasts at age 12, it has been a long time. I so remember and now wish I had listened to mum, poking me in the back hold your shoulders back you will be glad....
Okay off to have a soak..... HUGS and many many THANKS!!!
Saturday, December 29, 2012
had to look at the bottom corner of the screen to see what day it was. lol. Sunny, cold and an okay 2 walks, she didnt listen well and I am still sore. Better than last night when I had a lot of pain in my back and my R knee, didnt sleep well at all fitbit says 88% and I do believe it for sure this time. Not tired now , just not rested. Oh well.
Wish hubby would feel better soon, he is coughing and no energy at all. He even said he has things he wants to get done, but even going out to stand the compost bin up after the wind knocked it over tired him out. I don't let allie go wake him before 9 :30 now figuring he needs his sleep but he is also getting into that not being tired and going to bed at 2;30 -3 which isn't good for him.
So have read 3 blogs on New years eve and by the last one I was sad, and nearly crying, man it all comes down to my birthday and how I so don't like it. I don't mind the attention, the happy birthdays etc. I think it is cos I allow it to be the END of the YEAR that I have failed myself yet again. Then I get into am I not worth it even to myself... then spirals from there. So read the last one and thought better blog this out or will be a blubbering mess.
I know I have done good for me things this year, I also have done good for others. I can't allow myself to only see that I didn't get to a goal especially when I don't set good goals.
I know I say I will lose or exercise, or eat well etc. but also know that I am like most, hard on myself.
Anyway....... same ole thing this year... putting myself down and not letting myself see or acknoweldge the good, the healthy, the being nice to me that I did do.
For now I hear dh coughing so he is awake. I am going to get the kettle on as I haven't had a cup of tea yet and we both will want one. I sometimes wish I could just go away all alone for a day/night in a small cabin with woodstove, me tea, journal, books and a good fire going with a warm bed. lol DD asked me what I wanted for my birthday, wouldn't they all be some surprised if I said that! I have never been away alone since I was married, other than to go to take the kids to my parents when hubby was away on course. I did take a day trip with girlfriends to anothers house about 18 years ago.
One of those retreats for women... oh yea, hubby actually said we could go to the one in ON sometime, drive and camp then I could go do that for the 3 days and he and dog would camp. Have to think about it.
HUGS and now to go have hot cup of tea on this sunny but cold cold wind day!
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Snowed and oh boy does Allie love that! then it has rained, poured rain, so we have snow, slush and just yuk. One of the worst dog walking days. So 9:47 and I am going to put on rain pants, snow boots, jacket, all to go out for 10 mins maybe. lol I so so so wish the darn fence and steps were done so she could just run down the backyard. oh well spring.......
Had a good visit with family at sister in laws yesterday, good drive there and back. Today hubby sounds worse, dad is so tired all the time, and I am sore. Weather was to change so perhaps that is part of my back issues. I took arthrotec this am, and was going to take it this eve, even though I must eat with it, but didnt' eat any supper or anything else cos I had a cup of sepcialty tea and got super heartburn, bad enough and long enough to take my nexium med. I think I will take it for a few days to see if I feel better, as had a bout a few days ago, coudl be the hiatal hernia bothering me.
Had a nap this afternoon, I find our house cold in afternoon as hubby turns heat down from 11 -5 and it gets damp. EVERYONE says it is, but hubby. I remember one time my sister inlaw, brother in law and niece sitting on the couch at 10 pm with their jackets cos the heat goes down at 10pm till 6 am. hhubby said I am nto at all cold. but offered to put the heat up she insisted no, as they were leaving soon. GOOD Grief and yet he thinks it is me, dd, dil, that "think" it is cold. Dad has his heat way up of course which is good. Hubby doesnt mind that but anyway, I had a nap cos was cold, not sleeping well at night with hubbys cold - snoring so went to bed to read, curled up under the duvet, and fell asleep. Was nice for hour and a bit.
Okay off I go to let her out and then go find that warm bed may try a cup of tea, not even my green one just red rose decaf.
NIGHT ALL HUGS
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
I am not a scrooge, nor bah humbug ( if I had to choose one or the other would be bah humbug). Only that I don't like commotion and busyness. So last night was at our house and total commotion as allie knocked baby over asap, then wouldn't stop going nuts so was in the kennel barking for 2 hrs. Thomas was good and so was Eva, was just the noise, just as they left the other gang came.... then that was noise as Nikki let the dog out and the others were just leaving.
So then today it is at dd wtih the same crowd, supper was to be at 5 wasn't totally done till after 6. so Thomas kept saying supper soon please papa, ended up falling asleep eating 2 mouthfuls of sweet potatoes. Eva was good. Thomas woke up and had one of his screaming at the tiop of his lungs crying fit. Lily the other 3 year old was bugging the dog and the 10 year old was bugging me. LOL food was awesome and dd did fantastic as she did nearly all of it. I commend her doing it all. and the noise of the crowd. Dad came but was exhausted by the time he ate, so we took him home, and I went back foer a pc of pie. Lemon ahhh, she mad 3 pies and chris and family had gone, and so had dad and hubby she has way lots left.
Tomorrow is another one, at sil and bil house but will be more civilized as no little ones and not as much commotion.
Thought I did okay only cried 5 times and only 1 time did anyone notice and was hubby and wasn't crying just biting my lip, cos the 9 year old was being a pain in the a$$ and man I have no patience. I used to be amazed at how angry mum would get a kids when they were just bugging, well arghhhhhhhhhhhh hge was only being stupid asking me the same thing over and over to be a pain. Well I got up and moved after I asked him to stop, went over to hubby said I love you, he said whats up nothing, gotta get out of here, so i just walked down dd hall.
Had a good xmas morning, I got up walked dog, we had breakfast at home, then I went and got in the tub and even tried to curl up to fall asleep, did relax to the point of seeing purple which is always relaxing for me. I was then going to go back to bed but decided I better make dil a bday card as her bday is tomorrow adn was giving her her present tonight. So till we went over to dd it was nice. I only was sad melancholy 3 xs. I don't know why I get like this. Mum used to say was always like that since I was small. Oh well. at least it is only 2 days a year and my birthday.
So now going to finish here, go hug my hubby trying not to cry so he doesnt get upset and then me and my tea are going to bed. I so want to sleeeeeeeeep. am exhausted and didnt do near as much as dd, i just hope her back doesnt hurt in the am.
I hope an dpray you all had the day you wanted, happy, busy, or quiet and peaceful, whichever you wanted.
I got 2 charms for my braclet, and a top, ds gave us a gift cert for a restuarant here so we could go to a diff place for breakfast as he knows I wanted to go to coras but hubby says too $$ for every sunday. and dd and sil are happy, they didnt give gifts but the niece got her glasses yesterday!!! in time for Christmas day. Must have been a very joyous day in that household!
Okay night all and hugs to all of you, sleep well.
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