HEALTHY4ME's Recent Blog Entries

MY MUM june 30,1926-June 1 2009

Monday, June 01, 2009

oh well pic didnt work but you can see mum about 3 years ago in my pics if you so desire.

OMG thats the first time I have written that, she only passed not even 2 hrs ago, but now that we are home, I am wide awake and have to write. She was just breathing and opened her eyes, looked at us and closed them, sighed and went. Thats fine with me, no chayne stoking or anything catasrophic. She stayed with us longer than she would have wanted and now is at peace. I truely feel she is with my aunt darlene, her best friend and fav. sil.
dd was a basket case, ds tears, dad cried and held her hand, and brushed her hair, he wouldnt let me go home with him, or him with us. i hope he is okay there alone. scares me but thats what he wanted.
tomorrow call funeral home for cremation, and what ever else. they will have to tell me as I have no idea. dad has dr apt tomorrow, which i will cancel but will need his perscriptions refilled.
so dear mum, we did our best by you and I know you would be pleased. I am sad, will miss you so much but will continue to live life and take care of myself and know that you would want that. also I will try to be a great nanny to the new baby as you were to both our kids. You were always there for them and for that I am so thankful.
HUGs to you all and to each and everyone of you, thank you from the very bottom of my heart for being here and listening, answering and just being the best of friends.
Thank you and now i hope to sleep. tomorrow am, will come too early.
a hard day to face.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CALA2008 6/8/2009 9:37AM

    Cindy, our hearts are truly with you. We're so sorry about your mom. Our mom passed away on June 2nd. She wasn't ill, just aging issues. Very shocking and unexpected. Your mom will be watching over you and the grandbabies as our mom will be. They will both be in all of our hearts always, and are with their other special family members. Our love, hugs and blessings, always, Celeste and Michele.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KEIRALYNN 6/2/2009 3:38AM

    Cindy, I'm so sorry your mom has passed away. My thoughts and prayers are with you friend and your family.

Report Inappropriate Comment
COSMIC_ENERGY 6/2/2009 1:40AM

    Cindy--I'm so sorry to have missed this post yesterday. I know the peace of letting your mom go when it's time. Yes, even though it may be filled with the pain and sorrow of losing her on this earthly plain--you know she was ready to go. At least I did with my mom. Her body no longer served her beautiful essence and she's on to bigger and better things. emoticonJude

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACQUEBO 6/1/2009 10:03PM

    Cindy, my heartfelt sympathy in your loss. I am so glad that you are at peace with this. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time. I hope that you were able to rest. You are right about letting your dad stay alone, even if you were uncomfortable with it. It will take him awhile to get used to. I have been there. We are here for you anytime you need to talk.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HADYDADUBR 6/1/2009 4:38PM

    Sorry about your loss Cindy. You have my deepest sympathy.
I believe she is with Darlene now. Take care. Hugs Mary

Report Inappropriate Comment

She knew what a good daughter you were.

Comment edited on: 6/1/2009 12:15:38 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIBBIE49 6/1/2009 10:50AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
CAROLYN4033 6/1/2009 9:49AM

    Dear Cindy,

I am so sorry for your loss. The circle of life is hard. May the memories of your mother give you peace at this time.


Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMMA_GRIZZ 6/1/2009 6:55AM

    I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences. Take care. My prayers are with you and your family.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JLITT62 6/1/2009 5:52AM

    I am so sorry for your loss. I too believe that we are with our loved ones afterwards -- and even if we're wrong, it's still comforting to believe, right?

Peace to you & your family.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CAZ_NR_HEATHROW 6/1/2009 3:35AM

    Hello Cindy
Sorry to hear that mum has passed over, but I'm pleased for her and your family that it was peaceful at the end.
My sincere condolances, you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Much luv
emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

May 19 day 2

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

LOl yes I have to get back on track.... my Sp friend Von 1962 and I have both stated that we are back on track, so I decided to try to do my days again. hence dayyyyyyyy 2!

Life is still hectic. Mum is still in hospital and slowly going downhill. Some days are still pretty good, well 2 or 3 hrs of it then she is beat again. Mostly in bed, but able on a very good day to get in chair for a while. I have stopped going in the morning as she wasnt eating much and fell asleep very shortly afte I got there. Unfortunately, gas prices also play havoc in my visiting. Luckily we moved in from the country cos not sure what i would have done then! dad still goes 2x day, dd is there and I go too. ds drops in and dd is having issues with this. Oh well.
I had my interview and should hear back by end week if they are on time. I will not worry cos it will sort itself out. I do however need more hours from somewhere. I am going to walk to this new place today to time the walk. dog and I walked for 45 mins and mostly a good pace today. Very cool, winter jacket on and cold wind. argh........
Well was going to clean the inside of trailer today, suppose can put the heat on but gee. I have lots I can do in here instead. also dh and I are going up to the hosp. at supper as dd wants to make grampa and her bf supper at dads house. so I said all of you enjoy your time and I will feed mum and get her settled for the eve. will be a short visit as we have counc. at 6. I am hoping she will be awake this afternoon so she ewill be sleepy after supper. oh well all will be fine if we leave and she is awake for bit.
Gotta scoot - my back is really hurting sitting here. cya!!!
HUGS to all!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SF-RACHAEL 5/20/2009 1:38PM

    Hugs right back atcha, Cin. Way to go on Day 2. Keep on keeping on. You're doing great!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
COSMIC_ENERGY 5/19/2009 5:35PM

    Light and love--Jude

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMMA_GRIZZ 5/19/2009 9:58AM

    Good for you for getting back on track. It's cold here too - I woke up to new snow on the ground and they are expecting more mixed with rain today. Have a good day Cindy - stay warm.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAUDELEBOWSKI 5/19/2009 9:51AM

    good luck with your interview & getting back on track!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIBBIE49 5/19/2009 9:51AM

    As Gilda Radner would say on Saturday Night Live "IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING!"

I 'm glad to see you are on Day 2, even with all the stress in your life. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

Sunday may 3rd

Sunday, May 03, 2009

Sunny day and I have to work at 3. thats okay as I havent been working and we dont want to use all our savings to pay for the new windows.
Got our RV on Friday!! what a f.... adventure trying to get it in the driveway! thank heavens 2 bus drivers that live down our street saw us and took pity and came up and helped him. WHEW not looking forward to getting it out of the driveway again! Dh will get better at it and we want to get the driveway widened some.
Mum is hanging on, had a good morning but wonder how she will be later. Dad wants to take her for a short drive today with lisa. it wears her out so much and not sure she knows now.
Well it is after lunch and I have to get myself organized for work.
hope you all are well and VON I sure hope we get a chance to chat soon.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GERRYB54 5/4/2009 8:17AM

    Driveway parking for newbie RVers can be a real problem! People also forget sometimes to check their driveway to see if the RV can fit, make it up/down the slope without scraping...many things to consider.

My current RV had me worried slightly when we bought it, but I had checked everything needed, just concerned about the leveling legs is better than any of my previous ones. The 19.5" wheels and the wheelbase make it much more accessible to sloping driveways without any problems.

You'll get the hang of it soon enough...I back mine into my driveway parking spot on a curved driveway through a 12' gate, no problems!

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIBBIE49 5/3/2009 6:38PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
COSMIC_ENERGY 5/3/2009 5:00PM

    But just think what great adventures you could have in the RV. Hope the drive gives your dad a sense of giving your mom a bit of escape. Know it's hard on everyone, and eventually it will be too hard to do. Rain slated here for the week-yuck. As a teacher, I think we may be in for a bumpy week. Blessings sent your way--Jude

Report Inappropriate Comment
CJROMB 5/3/2009 12:01PM

    I've been thinking about you and what you've been going through with your Mum. I hope your Dad is handling this okay. It's so hard seeing them try to deal with someone they've known for so long and loved for so long be sick like that.

You're a great daughter, being there for them both.

I don't envy you trying to park the RV. I have a Ford F250 King Cab. It took awhile, and I know it's smaller than an RV, but I can now back that puppy into parking spots like a world champion. It impresses all the boys, but alas, I've been married for 20 years, so that's not useful. :)

Good luck on getting the other job, too, and have a great day.

Report Inappropriate Comment

April 20th Hardest thing I have ever done

Monday, April 20, 2009

We had the meeting with mums Ca dr and radiologist and they were fantastic. She sat with mum and talked to her, asking us confirmation as mum was wrong about a lot of stuff. Anway she said given her state ( not moving around much, more bed to chair and not up and about) it would probably cause more problems and not give more quality or time for her. so we chose not to...... also the dr did say that hospital is probably the best unless we as a family had decided diff. I am glad she said that cos think dad may have wanted her home, and know dd does. the hardest thing besides having it totally confirmed that she will be gone... is she keeps saying she wants to go home. She has always said be in hospital, and she does know dad cant do this alone or even with just me. so she knows when lucid but man how hard it is on me, must be h@ll for dad her saying lets go home, hey we could go for awhile........ anyway long hard day and I am tired. I did better than I thought, except when dad was leaving the hospital for eve, and i hugged him and cried and he held me and kissed my cheek he was crying too cos he left some fast. I cant remember the last time he held me or kissed me so know that it was hard for him....
well going to go and do something, too dark to go walk. i did walk this am. I hope to go back to the pool on wed. get a bit of routine back for awhile.
HUGS to everyone.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 4/21/2009 2:41PM

    I'm glad you are getting to have her in the hospital, since so many now will not take a patient for general care, but would have her go to a hospice. Glad it is working out for you and your father since I know how stressed you both are.
One of my Sparker friends said her Uncle died from a heart attack the other day, and her Aunt is terminal with breast cancer. He'd been taking care of her, so it was a total shock to the family. SO, I'm glad your father is getting a break.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CAROLYN4033 4/21/2009 9:20AM

    Cindy, I hear the pain your feeling and I am so sorry. I DO know that this is the hardest thing to do. I went through this 10 yrs ago with my mom. The sadness is overwhelming and time is the only thing that helps (somewhat). Hospice was wonderful for our family and for mom. The sooner you get them involved the better. I will pray for strength for you and your family, for I will be thinking of you often. May your heart find peace......Carolyn

Report Inappropriate Comment
KEIRALYNN 4/21/2009 2:10AM

    I'm so sorry Cindy, it makes me cyr to think of what your family is going through. I hope you can feel my (((((hugs)))))). Call me if you want to talk. When John was going through cancer I talked to a counselor at the cancer clinic, it really helped. Someone outside of the immediate family to talk to helps you to deal with the stress of it all. You go back to family feeling a bit betterafter talking it out. (((((HUGS)))))

Report Inappropriate Comment
COSMIC_ENERGY 4/20/2009 9:47PM


It is a hard time, but hopefully, you & your dad will get some rest. Does the hospital have any counseling for families, groups of caregivers, hospice chaplains that your dad would go to get validation that he is not alone in this and others struggle with these decisions too? These transitions adjustments are big hills to climb. Big Hugs--Jude

Report Inappropriate Comment
HADYDADUBR 4/20/2009 8:30PM

    It is good that you and your Dad can comfort each other during this difficult time.
Remember your friends are thinking of you too. Mary

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOSINGLINNDY 4/20/2009 8:19PM

    This is such a difficult time for you and your dad. Knowing you are losing someone you love is devastating. It is good that you can cry with your dad and comfort each other. Always know that I am here for you.

Blessing, Gaylinn

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMMA_GRIZZ 4/20/2009 8:09PM

    Aw, that's so sad.....and it must be so hard. Please take care. And remember to breath and cry if you need to, just cry to cleanse your soul.

Report Inappropriate Comment

April 17th Such a sad day, feel so bad for mum

Friday, April 17, 2009

Well mum got her hospital bed, understood when we took her where she was going etc.
Dad went back up around 7, but I wasnt talking to her. then dd and i went up at 8:30 to check and say goodnight. well she had been up at least 3 x. one time told the nurse yes she could help she was looking for aman, her husband. and oh there he is... sure enough he was walking in to see her. So now dad thinks they arent watching her. Anway they did get a sitter for the night to stay with her.
When we went in dd went in and i was talking to the nurse.dd comes out with tears. mummmmm she said oh lisa help me sit up I have to go home........ OMG tore at my heart and dd crying. OH man... i went in and said hi, whats going on adn you remember about the tumor and how dad needs rest etc. so when we left she was thinking about sleeping so pertty sure she will sleep and I know she will be fine cos I have done patient sitting and know all about it. I have actually worked on that unit so I am okay with this, just the guilt in one hand of her wanting to go home, but yet knowing it is the best thing.
I am overtired now, was beat earlier now am going to go to bed as niearly midnight. I hope and pray that dad sleeps. he is so tired the nurses are getting concerned about him.
I havent had time to do anyting but walk a short walk with dog the past 2 days. missed 2days at the pool, which is fine but i just want to keep taking care of me. Oh well...... Monday I may go to the pool. I can tell dad I will go to mum before or after or he in am. and me in afternoon.
wish i could find a money tree cos work has booked me off "incase" I need he weekend off and they cant fill it later. not really fair but......
Anyway we will be fine, just too bad this old world relies on the almighty buck so much.
I would love to go back to a abarter system.
night gotta get to bed.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HADYDADUBR 4/19/2009 12:38PM

    Glad your mom got a bed so you and your dad can rest. Take care of yourself. Mary :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIBBIE49 4/18/2009 7:47PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
KEIRALYNN 4/18/2009 4:18PM

    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I have lost many loved ones over the years and it is never easy but you do find an inner strength to get through it. ((((( HUGS))))) Try and take time to go the the pool, if possible, any stress relief you can find helps.

Report Inappropriate Comment
VON_1962 4/18/2009 5:33AM

    I am glad to hear your mom got a bed and that your dad will get some rest. I know she is in good hands at the hospital. You and I both work this field and know how important it is for the family to get some rest so, take your own advice and rest and take care of you. Your mom is in good hands. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Hope to see you around a bit this weekend. I am on the dayshift this weekend. Get this they want me to go back to nightshift because they are so short. I laughed! Take care my friend! ((hugs)) A day at the pool sounds like a much needed release.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEALTHY4JEANNE 4/17/2009 10:45PM

    I hope that you are able to get some rest. Be kind to yourself.
I am sorry that you have to go through this.

Report Inappropriate Comment
COSMIC_ENERGY 4/17/2009 10:41PM

    Take the rest--you will need to stop often and schedule breaks for yourself to stay rested and in control of your own life. I know you're keeping a level head about this all--Even so, it's hard to do what has to been done at times.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CALOUSTE 4/17/2009 10:40PM

    I am so sorry for your situation, it must be incredibly hard. Get some rest and take good care.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMMA_GRIZZ 4/17/2009 10:32PM

    Time for you to get some much needed rest too. Take the weekend off work and do just that. Rest and regain your strength. Many, many hugs to you.

Report Inappropriate Comment

First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 Last Page