Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Yes, it's true, I am back to 203. Oddly, although I know the weight has to come back off, I don't hate myself. It just is what it is.
The reason I gave all those months ago to go off my plan was I got tired of fighting. I did a self-check every now and again between then and now, asking myself if I wanted to stop overeating and go back on my plan, and the answer was no. Again, it was what it was, no excuses.
Something clicked a few days ago, and NOW I am ready. It feels safe to be here again.
It's so neat to see all the same friendly folks on my activity feed. It's good to be back...
Monday, April 18, 2011
Well, it wasn't as easy as the first day, but I did it, more or less.
I was absolutely beyond exhaustion Sunday. Disappointing, since I wanted to get a few little things done then to sorta lighten up the workload for Monday morning, always a good strategy when you work for yourself. Anyway, that wasn't happening. I slept half the day. And I'm one of these people who normally CANNOT sleep in the middle of the day, unless I'm sick. SO I guess I needed the rest.
In the afternoon, I felt so drained I gave in to temptation and ate a bunch of Wheat Thins. I'm 'fessing up here.
Granted, it's not the worst thing in the world, but still, 4 g of sugar per serving so they were technically off-limits.
I'm realizing the blessed reprieve a was somehow granted from my fibromyalgia is definitely over, and I am getting more and more of these "pooped" spells, with the muscle and joint pain and all the other fun stuff that goes with it.
I am not taking this lying down; I went to see my Dr., and she is ordering a full battery of tests to see what is going on with me. We will get to the bottom of this, no doubt.
I am realizing most of the time I overeat it's to get energy somehow. When you can literally barely move that (especially sweet) food looks awful good. Once I get this illness under control again, I will again be too busy to eat.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
At the suggestion of my friend Whitney (FIT-WHIT), we are going on a one week with out refined sugar challenge. If you are interested in the "rules," check her latest blog.
I started yesterday and here's the report:
It's not easy eliminating sugar! Especially if you're like me and totally hooked on the stuff. I do an okay job of staying off it when I'm being vigilant about my diet, but, alas, that hasn't been the case much lately (that's going to change, though).
Soooooo, how did I do? Actually pretty well! I went to town so I could work out and go grocery shopping and here's how I negotiated the challenge yesterday:
Breakfast was my usual: 1/2 cup oatmeal, 1/2 oz. raisins (fruit is allowed under this challenge; its the junky refined stuff we want to eliminate), 2 servings of whey protein powder (unsweetened), and herbal tea. No trouble there.
Mid-morning I set off for the gym and errands. Normally I would stick a Builders Bar in my bag, but those have 20g of sucrose, so I took a pass on that. There was basically nothing in the house, so I did not pack a snack. Bad, I know, but nothing I could do about it.
After my workout, I was really hungry, but I mentally scanned all the restaurants and eateries in Medford, and most of them had bad features: too much fattening food, too salty, etc. Not exactly a health-food mecca! I was really tempted to go to the Indian place, but its a ton of carbs plus I love the tamarind sauce (sweet!) so much that I drown everything in it. Um, no, not today.
But I was planning to shop in Ashland, which is a health-food mecca, so I drove the 15 minutes down there, parked at the Coop (one of my FAVE places, btw), and ran in to buy a loaf of flourless bread, some turkey, an apple, and some homemade slaw and asparagus from the hot food section. Yummy!
After going back in the store with a full tummy, I did my marketing, then drove to another store to complete it. Amazing how you have to shop at several stores to get all the things we want. It's tiring! I left a lot of things on the shelf, too, that might present a problem during the week. Not bad stuff, mind you; just things that are incompatible with 7-days-without-sugar.
After I finished all that hubs called me - would I drive to so-and-so's and pick up a package of bees (yes, you read that right, my husband is a beekeeper). Naturally, I had never been to this guy's house before and it's 25 miles out of my way, but I finally found the place and we loaded the big box in the back of my station wagon. I drove right home (in case you are wondering, yes, some of them got out, but they didn't bother me).
By this time, its pushing 5 and I was beat. Hubby saved the day here, because this is the WORST possible scenario for me - it's late in the afternoon, I'm tired and hungry and there's a whole houseful of food beckoning to me. He said, sit down, and I'll make dinner. What a sweetie! Thanks, darlin'!
It wasn't gourmet dinner, just a salad and a salmon burger, but it filled me up and kept me out of the kitchen.
Soooo, DAY 1 Completed!
What to you do to stay away from temptation?
Thursday, February 03, 2011
This year so far, it seems like I am perpetually digging out from something, not making progress like I was last year. Itís hard maintaining!
I got to within 4 lb. of my goal weight last Fall, and since then I have gained 6 pounds. Now I have 10 to lose. Sigh.
And stuff that makes me go backwards can happen in just a few days. Eternal vigilance really is the price of success. This weight will not stay off by itself.
Case in point:
A week ago Monday, everything was looking as bright as possible. A bit of bloating because TOM is coming, but hey, what else is new. (note to the Universe: I want menopause for my birthdayÖplease???)
Went to the gym, had a great leg workout. After I got home, my back started hurting. I guess I overdid it a bit. That happens too. Normally, I am fine the next day.
At the same time, sonny boy came home with a cold, which after fighting for a few days, I finally got. I donít get colds anymore, thankfully, unless someone brings one home and repeatedly inoculates me with it.
Then for some reason my PMS kicked into high gear. I was blowing up like a balloon and had the most intense food cravings. I mean like big time. Carbs, sweets, alcohol, you name it, if itís not on the eating plan, I want it.
So that was Tuesday to Friday. Fighting the cold, fighting the urge to eat, and forcing myself to get work done through my aching back. Finally Friday, forget it, Iím done. Iím sick. To bed I go.
So I am in bed out of it big time all weekend. When I get a cold, I donít fool around. I canít think clearly at all. I have no energy and all I can do is lay there. And eat (feed a cold, right?) So laying around, my back is feeling much better, I guess I am so distracted with all the other complaints I donít feel it.
Thereís one week completely shot. Food, out the window. Exercise, are you kidding me??
So Monday I am feeling like I can breathe and function again, and WHAMMO! here comes the back pain again, so severe I can barely move around. Getting out of a chair Ė pure torture. And the weather is glorious, sunny, even halfway warm, so I want to potter around outside. No way. Humph.
Wednesday I was able to do a bit of my daughterís Just Dance 2 game. (Side note: that game is really, really fun, get it if you have a Wii). I was mostly moving my arms about; trying not to move my trunk so as not to make things worse. But at least it was something.
Today I will see how I feel after I get my work done. I might pop in to the gym, just to make an appearance and get back into the groove.
Not working out for almost 2 weeks is really killing me. I can see the return of my old ways on the horizon. The habits that got me fat in the first place Ė eating all the time, not moving, drinking liquid libations every nightÖ.oh, yeah, we all know well that worked. Ugh.
So Iím examining my motives Ė did I throw in the towel and purposely sabotage myself??
Honestly, I donít think so. Well, I guess I could have stayed home from the gym and locked my son out of the house (kidding, Iím kidding!). And as for the cravings Ė I get them once in a while, and I confess I havenít figured out how to deal with them yet. They are hormonal in nature, and not usually that bad. Generally I just roll with them, go over my calories for a couple days and live with it. This time, what can I say, a lot worse.
Now itís hard for me to get back on the wagon. Some foods that I normally eat just seem yucky right now. Iím still craving the comfort food.
Okay, I read this over, and I am depressing myself reading it. I guess we are supposed to be uplifting and always look on the bright side of things, but the truth is the truth. Maybe next time it will be sunshine and bubbles...I hope so.
Thanks for listening to me whine. I love my Spark community!!!
Friday, January 14, 2011
Okay, I admit it. Winter is NOT my favorite season. Some of you have posted beautiful blogs about loving the winter wonderland and dancing among the snowflakes. Iím just not one of those people. I grew up in Southern California where a 55 degree day made everyone put on heavy coats, and even though I havenít lived there for over 20 years, the intolerance to cold remains.
In southern Oregon where I live, Natureís palette for Winter is more gray-and-green, rather than the white-and-brown of points further north and east, but itís still plenty foggy, cold and dreary. Plus the days are short so thereís little light.
My idea of the perfect wardrobe consists of tank tops and shorts and sandals all year round. In fact I would dispense with the sandals if I could except Iím OCD about tracking dreck into the house.
So December was not my greatest month.
It was the perfect storm of all the weather-related stuff Iíve described above, hysterical levels of busy-ness at my job (I own my own business where I sell online), easy availability of sugar and junk like there is every Yule season, business travel and stress.
That wound up costing me about 8 (!!!!) pounds on the scale. Yikes! One of the first things I had to do (after I stopped stuffing my face, of course) was to be honest and change my weight ticker here. Itís easy to revise our weight downward, but itís a real blow to the ego to go the other way, isnít it?
Then of course I got busy! Gym time, weights galore, dancing and Zumba with the Wii and just to have fun with the music blasting, spending hours gardening on the one nice day weíve had so far this year, and on and on. Basically getting off and STAYING off the couch!!!!
This week I have burned insane numbers of calories. Itís nice having some time for myself again! Playing Santaís elf and having the kids home really cut into things last month.
So yesterday, I was feeling quite a bit thinner, stepped on the scale, and YEAH!!! Back down to within one pound of my lightest weight!!! And not only that, I took my measurements.
Get a load of this: The last time I measured myself was before a challenge I thought I was going to complete (wrong time of year, as you can imagine). That was on 11/24.
Measuring all the same bodyparts yesterday, I found I had lost a total of 3 (THREE) inches!!! They were mainly small losses, half an inch here, a quarter or an eighth thereÖbut hey, this is after basically five weeks of semi-crappy eating and 2 weeks of being back on the wagon.
What I really want to get across here is, forget that all-or-nothing mentality most of us used to have: you know, you eat a slice of cake and you figure, what the hell, I might as well eat the rest of it because everythingís already screwed up. Not true.
I obviously didnít follow my plan all the time during those stressful December days, but one this I did do that I never did before, I always started fresh the following morning. Too much sugary food and wine at night? The old me would have woken up and continued the binge unbroken the next morning.
Not anymore. Now, Iíd start with my on-point healthy breakfast, oatmeal and eggs or whatever it was, a snack, healthy lunchÖ
Then sadly at some point (usually at dinner) Iíd go off the rails. Not that I am excusing it, eating rich food in the evening is probably the worst time to do it, but I picked myself up and started again.
Every day. Without fail.
I think that strategy, if you could even call it that, helped me be able to lose whatever I gained fairly quickly. One of my Sparkfriends very wisely pointed out that if you gain weight quickly, itís more likely you can lose it quickly. Itís the fat thatís been pounded into our tissues for years thatís so hard to get rid of.
Never, never, NEVER give up!!!!
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