Tuesday, September 07, 2010
I'm beginning a new phase of my weightloss. After losing 40 lbs. with Weight Watchers, I feel so much better, but have to admit that my focus was primarily on weight loss and not health & nutrition. I ate processed foods, meats & dairy...contrary to my inner desire to eliminate them and my belief that they harm.
I've plateau'd over the past month and have stayed right around 175. I've been okay with that since this is the point where in the past I'd start to backslide. So as long as I'm not gaining, I'm content to sit here for a bit and adjust before pushing to reduce more.
But now I'm having an ever-increasing desire to improve the quality of my food. After 6 months of tracking, I'm a little tired of that. I'm scared not to track, though, because that's what has always lead to my downfall and regain. However, it's not realistic for me to say I'll track for the rest of my life.
I encountered Dr. Joel Furhman's Eat to Live program right here at SP in 2007 and joined the team. Dr. Fuhrman's protocol is eating a vast amounts of vegetables daily, both raw & cooked. Also advocated are fruits, beans & legumes, seeds & nuts. Whole grains are recommended in moderation and he recommends the elimination of all oils, animal protein & dairy (although does allow it in moderation). He's totally against processed foods and my favorite quote of his is: "The most important thing to remember about food labels is that you should avoid foods that have labels." I think it's the healthiest way of eating on the planet. It resonated with me strongly and I followed it strictly for a couple of months and then gave up on it. Since then, I've been on again-off again with it. I've always had a strong to desire to follow the program, but it became too difficult to do with a non-supportive husband and no one else to turn to for support.
At this stage, my quest for good health is equally as strong as my desire for slimness. I've committed to eating the Eat to Live way and this time my husband is more accepting - maybe because he's given up trying to convince me it's wrong.
For now, I'm not tracking points or calories. I am keeping a food journal as a way of keeping a record of the foods I'm eating and being able to observe if any toxic foods make their way back in. I'm still going to my WW weekly meetings as a safety net. I only have 20 lbs. to go to become a Lifetime member, whereby I can go without having to pay. I still would like to accomplish that goal. But, I'd love to do it by eating only high nutrient-dense foods and doing so because it makes me feel good, not just to reduce weight.
This is a crucial turning point for me and I'm a little scared. I'll need all the support I can get from my fellow Eat to Livers!!!
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
This afternoo, DH and I went to the NY State Fair. We haven't gone in a few years and it's been a trigger in the past, with all the food smells beckoning to me. Today was different.
It got up to 93 degrees, but I found that the heat didn't bother me - one NSV I've come to appreciate is that without the added fat insulation I can tolerate hot days pretty well.
I went directly to the Herman's Hermits outdoor concert, and my dear husband Dan went to look at farm animals (win-win for both he and I). I felt so full of joy listening to the musics of my youth, and I truly felt like a kid again! When I was 14, I had the most wicked crush on Peter Noone. His poster hung on my bedroom wall and I would dream about being his girlfriend. I do believe I even liked him more than any of the Beatles. If someone had told me back then that I'd someday get a chance to be standing about 5 feet away from him to take a picture, I'd probably start screaming, LOL! I think he still looks good - I got a pretty good shot of him, didn't I? And he's very funny on stage too! I was on Cloud 9.
After the concert, Dan and I reunited to walk around and see some of the exhibits. The smells did NOT get to me...quite the contrary, all I could smell was grease and it was not appetizing at all. Then, the most interesting thing happened. Dan wanted an ice cream cone so we went into the Dairy and Milk building. He got one and I had NO interest whatsoever in getting one, so I didn't. I think he was a little shocked. When I thought about it, it wasn't that I wanted one and abstained because I thought I shouldn't have it.....I actually did not want it! That's a huge change for me that I need to recognize and acknowlege that I HAVE come far.
I was in a very good place...happy and content and feeling in the zone. It's a place I want to stay in as much as possible.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Here I am, 40 pounds lighter, from 215 to 175. I am happy about that, but am also feeling apprehensive about what is happening to me right now.
The first 3 months - March, April & May - were like a dream...I was focused, committed, and everything fell into place so well that it almost seemed too easy. I loved going to my Weight Watcher meetings because I lost every single week. I was excited and committed - nothing was going to stop me. I lost 30 pounds in those first 12 weeks, averaging between 2-3 lbs. a week after a 5 lb. loss the first week.
The next 3 months - June, July & August - were more challenging. I lost 10 pounds in those 12 weeks, which still wasn't too bad, averaging about 1 lb. a week with the exception of 1 week that I gained 1 lb. and another week I gained 0.2 lb. But I did notice myself slipping. Things began to change.
I started what I'll call an "attitude plateau" right around August 1. It's the same thing that has happened to me twice before, coincidentally each time after about 5 months when I'd lost 30-40 lbs. and was between 175-185. It's a pattern I intend to halt immediately.
As I think about it, one of the things that happens is that I get satisfied with the way I look and feel. I get complacent. I'm not at my goal, but I no longer feel fat and frumpy like I did before I lost the 40 lbs. I can wear a size 12 comfortably instead of squeezing into size 18 pants. Catching a surprise glance in a mirror pleases me instead of horrifying me like it did. I'm no longer winded while walking fast or going up the stairs. I'm feeling more energetic and fit.
The other thing that happens is that after 5 1/2 months of tracking, I get a little tired of weighing my food and do more eye-balling of portions and guesstimating how many points something is. I start to snack more than usual and go over my points more. I dip my toes into the water of trigger foods I haven't had in a while. But, at least I have continued to keep up my food log and can see in writing why my losses have slowed.
That part of me that doesn't want to have to plan or track starts to emerge...it complains "Why should I have to pay all this attention to what I'm eating? Why can't I just naturally eat less? Just a little ice cream, cookies, "you-name-it" won't hurt...I'll get back to my plan tomorrow". But that's dangerous thinking for me, for tomorrow doesn't ever come. All the tomorrows become one more today that accumulates into all those yesterdays that got me where I was in the beginning.
I CAN NOT, WILL NOT allow this to happen yet again. I've unleashed my inner Jillian, who says: "stop complaining and DO something about it!"
"Yeah, I'm talkin' to YOU!"
I've come up with some action plans...
First and foremost, I need to do the mental work. That means getting back to regular meditation, visualization, saying daily affirmations, and watching my weight loss hypnosis DVD. I'm a fan of Abraham-Hicks and believe in the power of thoughts and changing your vibration from "what is" to what is desired in order to attract what I want, which is good health, fitness, and a slim attractive body. All that complaining about "how bad things are" does is bring about more of "how bad things are". This is the last you'll hear me talk about slipping or struggling. From here on out, I am simply doing all that needs to be done and I am achieving my desired shape and size.
Next, I am going back to what worked. It's again. I have my first 3 months food journal in front of me and I'm going to repeat the food plans that yielded me great results. I will happily weigh and measure my food because I know that each week I'll get to see the scale move downward. I will eat more veggies, fruits & beans/legumes that offer more nutrition and fiber to keep me full and satisifed.
I'm only 20 pounds from my WW goal of 155 lbs. which should put me in a size 10. After I maintain that for 6-12 months, I may decide to go for my ultimate "dare to dream" goal, which is 140. I know this is possible for me. I haven't come this far only to slide backwards. This feels too good. The old me is history. Those old habits did not serve me. It felt like I was being held a prisoner in my own body, eating away pain and sorrow, yet never getting any satisfaction. That chapter is closed. Bring on the joy and freedom of being slim and healthy.
Get An Email Alert Each Time HAPPYWALKER Posts