Monday, June 02, 2014
Last week of the RV Enthusiasts group challenges ! It has gone fast this time. This blog is part of that last challenge. I am not as adventurous as some but I love to try new things sometimes. First time I joined spark, I did not find a group that I felt was "family". I just could not relate to them, some did not have challenges or support and as a result, I ended up losing a lot of weight on my own and leaving just to come back heavier than what I had left at.
This time around, I was lucky enough to find "my" Rv group and I just love them. They are a fabulous group of people that support one another through thick and thin. Some have known each other for years, some have left and returned. Some are newer members like me, but I feel like we are family.
The challenges are like a bonus. They help me focus more on the journey or task of the week rather than the life long journey, which can seem quite daunting at times. To have a goal of 324# down to 130#- 150# is darn right scary at times. I enjoy the challenges whether I do well or not. It is learning about something new and testing myself to see if I have what it takes to make it through those challenges, that helps me focus and see my journey as one day at a time instead of the "life long diet" mentality that occasionally rears its ugly head.
I also get to see what helps me along my journey, what is not as helpful, and that we are all human. We do well, we fall down, and we pick ourselves back up. That, in my opinion, is what life is all about. We improvise, we overcome, we willing adapt to succeed in our spiritual journey through life and for me that includes taking better care of ME. I am all about taking care of others being a nurse, but I have found out the hard way, I do not want to be a burden to anyone else, so that means taking the time to make me a priority and get to healthy and stay there.
I think it is hard to run a spark group all by yourself and I have the utmost respect for Sharon for doing it and again, bonus, that she does it so well. I love these people and truly feel blessed to be part of this family. Thanks friends.
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
I think everyone struggles at one time or another. Negative Nellie gets very loud in my head sometimes and if I am in a good place, I can tune her out but let me be under just a little stress or be a little tired and she becomes quite pushy, takes over and I end up binging or not exercising. This can last hours, days, months or years, depending on where my head is and whether or not I can see my future (goals).
I have been strong in the past, lost a lot of weight a few times, and have put it back on. I have always had the high blood pressure and high cholesterol but now the kidneys and diabetes thing has cropped up. I knew it could if I did not take care of me. I foolishly ignored my own fears and continued doing everything in my life the easier softer way. I ate out too much ( too much fat & salt), I sat around too much (surprised I did not get a clot), I chose to blame everything in my environment but me ( insert excuse here). I ignored the situation until my legs swelled up and I could not breathe (think congestive heart failure).
I am 52 and am way too young for this kind of crap. I have not worked this hard for this long to retire and die. I want to travel and see the states. I want to hike, swim, and if I can conquer my fear, zipline. I never made any plans or goals. I just let life do what it would or could given my health and size. Well, let me tell you, my head is in the game. I am an active player now. I am taking that bull (poor health habits) by the horns and I am flipping him upside down. I am in charge.
I still have days or hours where lazy tries to sneak in and on those days I have a plan. I look at my vision board. I say my mantras or positive quotes. I look in the mirror in my eyes and ask what is my reality right now ? What will I do right now ? Do I want to be in that bad pace again where I can not breathe, I can not walk, I can not tie my shoes, I may have to have 6 people to lift me into the ambulance ? It is cold and hard but that is what I need.
My mantra's change but right now, these are some I use. It brings me focus on those days I feel blah, do not want to exercise, am craving sweets, feel bad about my body, etc.
WOW, YOU LOOK GREAT !
HEALTHY NEVER LOOKED SO GOOD !
I AM PROUD OF MYSELF !
I AM FULL OF ENERGY AND VITALITY AND MY MIND IS CALM & PEACEFUL !
I CHOOSE TO CHANGE MY EATING HABITS AND I SUCCESSFULLY DO SO !
I MOVE TO STAY HEALTHY ! (which saves me money in pills and Dr. visits).
BE MISERABLE OR MOTIVATE YOURSELF. IT IS ALWAYS "MY CHOICE" !
I SEE MYSELF HEALTHY FIT & FLEXIBLE ! This one helps when I am being negative about a particular body part.
MY BODY NATURALLY SHEDS UNNEEDED FAT ! Love this one, that means I do not have to work, right ? WRONG !
I AM ATTAINING AND MAINTAINING MY IDEAL WEIGHT !
Live in the moment. Be kind to yourself. You only have one body. It is your house. Keep it clean with healthy food. Move it to clean it and get rid of toxins. Remember food is fuel and we are becoming like the hybrid cars and require much less fuel to be more efficient. I do not want to struggle with my health for the rest of my life. I want to be excited in every moment my God and angels bring me. So, for now, this is helping and I will continue to educate myself and try new things. Keep sparking friends.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
I am feeling so blessed. The past few months have been a whirlwind. There has been so much happy today, I can hardly stand it. I am celebrating me by sharing my blessings. I hope you do not take it as bragging. I am learning it is ok to celebrate me some times, so while it is a new feeling, it is also a good feeling.
When I joined The Living healthy Iowa Challenge through work, i never imagined we would win (my 72 year old mom & I). I did not even know they had prizes. I just knew I needed something to keep me motivated to continue on my healthy path and I had to have another person to make a team.
Mom was wanting motivation to change also so I added her as my teammate, introduced her to Spark and we got started. I never knew how motivated she could be when she had a goal in mind. Well, she sure showed me, and a lot of others. She is down 38# and 3 dress sizes in 10 weeks.
I "relearned" that there is a direct relationship to how much you lose, how much you move, and how good you can feel. I knew this. I needed a reminder because I was only doing 30 minutes of easy exercise. I am still doing only moderate exercise but now 60-90 minutes, and I am being more consistent with strength training. I am happy with the energy I have now. I still get winded easy but not as fast. I walk faster and definately farther.
I have worn sweats for the past 2 years because of my weight. I bought size 32 jeans but did not like that they were being pulled down in back by my hiney being so big so I never wore them. Today, we get our prizes so I tried on my jeans. Since I am down 71#, I decided to try the size 28 first, 26... nope, 24...FITS !!! OMG, IT fits and I can sit, I can breathe. I am so happy. Talk about NSV. That is anawesome one.
I started my day attending a mindful eating class through work (part of a decrease in insurance rates). I learned more than I thought I would. I had my snack questions answered since I struggle with what is a good for me vs. what sweet do I want. www.Myplate.gov was recommended by the dietician as a very informative site. I will check it out tomorrow.
I had some time before my health coach meeting (also through work), so I went to the mall and walked 45 minutes. Lots of people there and they were all smiling, happy, and EXERCISING. Go figure... another direct relationship.
Health coach meeting went well. My weaknesses are sweets (duh !) and I need to do more ST. I have a plan, I have the support of work, family, and Spark family. How can I fail ? I won't.
This time around, I am doing this for me, not to meet a guy, not to be promoted at work, not to fit in an airplane, and not to keep up with skinny friends. I want health and if that means I will still be overweight by BMI standards, then so be it. I can live with fluffy as long as I can move, breathe easy and still be active and have fun with the rest of my life. So today, I celebrated me and I feel good about it.
Friday, February 07, 2014
Today is an odd day. I am crying at happy, sad, laughing at happy. I feel off somehow. Emotions are up front and speaking out. I probably need to burn some energy. Some people I know are going through rough times, like we all do but they are finding it hard to see the light, the positive, that changes us and makes us who we are. I wish I could help more but I can not. They need to see it and embrace it and learn from it and all I can do is pray they do. Facebook is wonderful and horrible all in one. It is hard to not get caught up in the drama that is always being expressed. This day is testing my "tolerance goal". I am not in their shoes, I do not see their story, I can not judge.
I know part of my emotions are because I am doing everything right but the scale goes up, then down, same 4 pounds past 3 weeks. The number does not define me. It does not rule my day. It does sit on the back porch of my mind and occasionally the swing there moves and catches my attention and I have to turn back towards the future and my dreams & goals. It is distracting and I need to stay focused.
I will remind myself change takes time and I have time. I am in process like a file on the computer. I am growing and getting healthy one day at a time. I know moving will better my mood so I will go and exercise now and get some emotions out the healthy way and who knows, maybe that scale will be lower tomorrow.
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