Monday, March 21, 2011
I finally framed and hung family photos in one of our halls. When I look at the photos of myself I see that I left out the ones in which I was really round. Instead, I hung ones where I was partially hidden behind objects or other people or when I was much slimmer than now. But, since I wanted a couple of my babyish photos up, there was no getting around showing how very round that little face of mine was. My DH is a doll. He says our daughter's baby pictures and one of our granddaughters look very much like I did. I have to agree that we do look quite a bit alike. Now, I don't know what that little granddaughter will look like when she's grown...she's only 15 months old now. But, I do know what our daughter looks like and she is beautiful. She struggles to keep weight on ...a problem I can't even relate to at this point in life. Our son-in-law told me years go that she looks just like me. I can't say that I can see such a strong resemblance, but apparently others do. So, now when I look at my chubby photos or my slimmer self along the way, I remember the compliments I've also heard along the way. They echo through that self talk that can be so destructive. This week I intend to recall those kind words each time I begin to think in negative terms about myself. >>>>>> After all, I am a beloved daughter of our Most High God and I know that He doesn't make junk! Praise God and please pass those carrot sticks. Have a great week all of you wonderful SP friends!
Thursday, March 10, 2011
"Fatso", "Chubby", "Fatty", "Waddles" -- Those were the most common names that the mean kids called me when I was a little girl. Even my parents called me chubby as they continually loaded my plate with very unhealthy fare and told me to clean my plate and eat dessert every single day. It wasn't until junior high that I stubbornly refused some of what was put in front of me. I finally slimmed down and during high school and college I was not nearly the fat person I was as a child. Still, those names haunted me and it didn't really matter what the scale or the clothes said I saw fat when I looked in the mirror. The weight went up and down for a lifetime. I continue to struggle. But, now I'm trying to remember how it felt at my slimmest rather than at my fattest. Even when the doctor told me I was underweight I saw fat in the mirror. It has been a difficult journey, but I know I can be slim again. This particular time I'm bouncing around between a couple of measures and am eager to see another dive. But, this winter has brought me continual illness. The illness brought me to comfort foods. My DH brings home things I shouldn't eat, but I can't resist right now. So, I'm struggling a bit, but know that soon all will be back on track. I know I must remember what it feels like to be successful rather that continually hear the echos of those cruel names. I know I can do it better this time.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Every time I feel the least bit down and turn to blog or read from others at SP I am so encouraged. You give me so many good tips, so many great ideas, and so many positive strokes just when I need them most. Today I've begun my fifth course of antibiotics in four months. I just can't seem to get rid of this nasty infection that brings on the fevers, cough, pain and fatigue. The bad news is that it really plays havoc with my workout and other plans. The good news is that I end up catching up on quieter activities - reading, getting into SP, watching movies, writing cards and letters. I suspect I'll finally be done with this bronchitis and pneumonia cycle when the weather turns warmer and I get to be outdoors more. However, since I spend quite a bit of time with small grandchildren, I also suspect that I'll do better when their little immune systems are stronger and they stop coughing in my face. And....so it goes. Today I'm enjoying reading from all of you out there who share such interesting stories, blogs, tips and love. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! You are the BEST!
Monday, February 14, 2011
I just dropped my DH at the airport and he will not get to be back until a week from today. As much as I will miss him, I also look forward to accomplishing much more on a schedule totally of my own making. For example, I look forward to having time and energy to walk outdoors in this beautiful weather and also getting to my little gym a few floors below our condo. I do have several meetings and appointments this week, but I also have oodles of extra time when not having to think about meals or cleaning or laundry so much. I see it as a chance at yet another new beginning of sorts. For example, a friend and I just began a video and book weight loss series. We will compare notes again on Friday and spend some time walking together if the weather holds (snow is predicted, but a lot can change over time). It's also time to gather together all the tax info and this year it is especially complicated so I look forward to having it together for someone else to do. Meals can be very simple - small containers of light yogurt, oatmeal, cheerios, an egg here and there, fresh fruits and veggies and lots of water. I can graze rather than having to sit down to a big meal in the evening as my dh enjoys. I prefer to eat most of my calories during the day and just have something small and light in the evening. If I am successful in losing a few pounds while my dh is away perhaps he will join me in my desired eating plan. He says he wants to lose a few pounds so maybe he won't sabotage me this this around. I have high hopes. Yes, this is the start to a week that is all mine!
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