Wednesday, September 12, 2012
My new favorite dessert.....
-One box mix Pillsbury Sugar-Free cake mix (I've used both the Devil's Food and the Yellow mix)
-12 ounces diet 7-Up (or Sprite, Sierra Mist... anything clear)
Bake according to directions on the box.
Serve with fresh cut up fruit (I prefer strawberries) and Cool Whip Free as toppings... YUMMO!!!!!
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
My last two attempts to stay on track (August and again in October) only lasted two weeks. I had decent losses both times, so I'm not sure why I wasn't motivated enough to get through week 3. I am very aware of this today, as I start week 3. Of course, being that it's Thanksgiving week really will keep me on my toes! It is only one meal, and I can enjoy it without over-indulging. I will be at my daughter's house with my two grandchildren, so that is what I will be focusing on.
I'm ready for you this time Week 3! You will NOT push me off track!!
11/28/2011.... omg, today is the LAST day of week 3 and I'm still on track!!! I'm so happy! Bring on week 4!!!!!!
Monday, September 26, 2011
I had a mini-epiphany this weekend.
I was in the midst of eating mindlessly, when I stopped and literally asked myself out loud, 'why am I eating like this..... why does it make me feel good?'
It didnt take long for me to come up with the answer this time. The food I choose gives me the feeling I crave for..... having a warm, safe, nurturing, cozy, peaceful home. You know.... like the ones in the magazines! There is always a warm fire burning... the family cooking a delicious meal together.... there are seasonal decorations everywhere.... the furniture looks so comfy with all the lavish materials.... the family is all smiling.... just a very inviting feeling.
So, why do I crave this? I grew up lower middle-class.... we had an average home which my mom did her best to keep nice. There was a LOT of disfunction in my parents marriage, which spilled over to us kids. There was never that peaceful feeling in the home. When I got married and had kids, money was very tight. I divorced when my two daughters were toddlers and money got even tighter. I rented the same apartment for 17 years while raising my kids. Our home was peaceful, but far from the homey environment I had always dreamed of. Plus, it wasnt mine. I moved from there six years ago and into a mobile home owned by my current husband. I have painted and re-decorated as much as I can, but I will never have that safe feeling in this home. Last month when hurricane Irene hit, I was truly scared.... like never before. A tree did come down on the property, but thankfully just the top of it hit the mobile home... no permanant damage.
I love to bake. I love to have scented candles burning. I love soft blankets and big cushy pillow. I love soft music playing. All pieces out of my imaginery dream home. I love to eat warm baked goods..... soft buttery mashed potatoes.... hot cocoa and toast.... slow-cooked pot roast..... mmmmmm, cant you just smell all of those!! When I eat, my mind goes to that place.... that place I crave. Even though it's only for a moment, its pure heaven. I continually eat to get that feeling... over and over. I've read many books for emotional eaters suggesting that I find alternatives for my eating to fulfill my needs. I've tried most of them.... reading, taking a hot bath, exercising, counting to ten, etc etc. They work temporarily, but nothing gives me what I really want. So how do I stop dreaming of a warm, safe, nurturing, cozy, inviting home? Or, how do I deal with the wanting it, knowing that I will never have it. (I'm a realist, I will never have that magazine home or the family that lives there!!)
You know.... this seems kind of silly as I go back and read this blog.... but it really goes deep with me. It's not just a materialistic want.... it's the picturesque lifestyle that goes with it. I'm sure very few people in this country really live that life... but I want it... I crave it. I have a hole in my heart from being raised in a cold, non-nurturing home. So I fill it.
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