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I-11-13... PUNS FOR THE EDUCATED MIND

Friday, January 11, 2013

GOT THIS EMAIL TODAY AND THOUGHT I'D PASS IT ON:)

1.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was
Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2.
I thought I saw an eye-doctor on an Alaskan island,
but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

3.
She was only a whisky-maker, but he loved her still.

4.
A rubber-band pistol was confiscated from an algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5.
No matter how much you push the envelope,
it'll still be stationery.

6.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road
and was cited for littering.

7.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would
result in Linoleum Blownapart.

8.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

12.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

13.
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

14.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:
'Keep off the Grass.'

15.
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from
prison was a small medium at large.

17.
A backward poet writes inverse.

18.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts.
In feudalism it's your count that votes.

20.
If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you'd be in Seine.

21.
A vulture carrying two dead raccoons boards an airplane. The stewardess looks at him and says,
'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'

22.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says, 'Dam!'

23.
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again
that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

24.
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says, 'Are you sure?'
The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'

25.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain
during a root-canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

26.
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

(LEFT OUT A FEW I THOUGHT WERE IN POOR TASTE...)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GOODHEALTH4EVER 1/12/2013 1:50AM

    THANKS EVERYONE, GLAD YOU HAD A emoticon

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LINDAINALABAMA 1/11/2013 6:29PM

    thanks for giving me several laughs.

emoticon

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PROVERBS31JULIA 1/11/2013 2:03PM

    I LOOOOOOOOOVE PUNS!!

I probably have two or three copies of this email!!

Do you know what 2/3 of a pun is??



emoticon






emoticon







Giv
e up?




P U !!!



Comment edited on: 1/11/2013 2:04:11 PM

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BARBARAROSE54 1/11/2013 11:07AM

    emoticon

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MRSWHITEWOLF 1/11/2013 8:29AM

    Thanks for starting my day with a laugh. Hope you have a blessed Friday and weekend!!!!

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COLLEENROSTE 1/11/2013 4:29AM

    starting my day with a smile- thanks for sharing

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WINTER CHALLENGE GOALS

Thursday, December 13, 2012

HERE ARE MY GOALS FOR THE BL WIINTER LIME CHALLENGE:)

MY 5 GOALS

1) DO WATER EXERCISES AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK

2) EAT AT LEAST 5 FRUITS & VEGGIES DAILY

3) PAY ATTENTION TO HOW MY BODY FEELS AND EXERCISE ACCORDINGLY

4) GET AT LEAST 7 HOURS OF SLEEP NIGHTLY

5] USE PORTION CONTROL EVERY MEAL AND SNACKS

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MRSWHITEWOLF 12/28/2012 12:49AM

    You can do it! Great goals!

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BARBARAROSE54 12/15/2012 3:28PM

    emoticon emoticon

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KRZYKAT3 12/13/2012 10:58PM

    yahoo Rett! THeses are awesome goals.

Do you track on SP?

Sounds like we all need sleep this week, must be the changes in weather! Rest well my friend!

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KELLY_SS 12/13/2012 9:23PM

    Sounds like a wonderful plan to me!
emoticon

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BE-THE-CHANGE 12/13/2012 7:57PM

    emoticon

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UNZIPPEDFATSUIT 12/13/2012 4:24PM

    Great List! emoticon

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PHOENIX43 12/13/2012 8:57AM

    Love your background!
emoticon
Have a great day!

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GHOSTFLAMES 12/13/2012 4:33AM

    emoticon emoticon

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REFLECTION, BL FALL LIME TEAM CHALLENGE

Friday, November 16, 2012

I HAVE BASICALLY STAYED THE SAME WEIGHT OVER THESE 10 WEEKS. MY POOL EXERCISING HAS STOPPED FOR THE TIME BEING. I'M NOT HAPPY WITH THAT. I NEED TO FIND A NEW VENUE FOR MY WATER EXERCISING.
I LOST THE MOMENTUM I HAD FOR EXERCISING WHEN IT BECAME DIFFICULT GETTING TIME AT THE POOL. WE ALL KNOW THAT ONCE YOU SLACK OFF ON YOUR EXERCISE ROUTINE, IT BECOMES EASY TO STOP ALL TOGETHER. HOWEVER I AM NOT GIVING UP!!!
I INTEND TO CONTINUE THE GOALS I SET FOR THE B L LIME TEAM SUMMER CHALLENGE. I KNOW IF I FOLLOW THESE, I WILL BE SUCCESSFUL.

A BIG THANK YOU TO ALL MY LIME TEAM MATES AND LEADERS:) emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRZYKAT3 12/2/2012 11:02PM

    RETT, HOw is your hula & uke lessons going? Missed you this fall.

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LUCYLIN101 11/20/2012 10:37PM

    Rett, Your blog is almost identical to mine. Pool time fell off. Workouts suffered and I am totally off kilter from my normal routine.
But, like you, I am not giving up. Thanks for your presence and participation in the Fall challenge. I hope you have much success during the winter months!

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MRSWHITEWOLF 11/18/2012 12:59AM

    You can do it, Rett! I believe in you!!! You can do it, really you can! I am rooting for you. We both can do it together...may not be on same plan but we sure can root for each other and I love ya friend!

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WEEK 6 FALL CHALLENGE BL, LIME TEAM

Wednesday, October 17, 2012


BOTTOM OF THE LARGEST MONTEREY PINE IN THE BACK YARD. THERE ARE 4 TREES THAT HAVE GROWN TOGETHER.

I HAVE A LOVE HATE RELATIONSHIP WITH THESE BIG BEAUTIES. I LOVE THAT THEY REPRESENT STRENGTH, RESILIENCE AND BEAUTY. I LOVE THAT THEY REMIND ME OF THE PINE FORREST BACK HOME. THE SMELL IN THE SUMMER IS SWEET AND INTOXICATING. IT BRINGS BACK A FLOOD OF MEMORIES EVERY YEAR. I LOVE THAT WHEN IT GETS REALLY HOT, THE PINE CONES OPEN AND IT SOUNDS LIKE POPCORN POPPING IN THE CANOPY. THEY FILL MY SENSES DAILY WITH THEIR LUSH COLOR, THEIR DANCES ON THE WIND AND A CALMING PRESENCE. THEY GROUND ME TO THIS EARTH AND PUT IN PERSPECTIVE THE LARGER THINGS IN LIFE; LIKE DOING THE RIGHT THING AT THE RIGHT TIME, SHOWING KINDNESS AND RESPECT, THE IMPORTANCE OF DOING THE SMALL THINGS WHILE KNOWING I AM PART OF THE WHOLE AND I AM IMPORTANT.
I HATE THAT PROGRESS HAS SURROUNDED THIS LITTLE FORREST, CHANGING THE LANDSCAPE AND MAKING THESE BEAUTIFUL LIVING SENTINELS OBSOLETE.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRZYKAT3 10/25/2012 11:12PM

    wow RETT NOT ONLY ARE YOUR PICTURE SO WELL TAKEN THE BEAUTY OF YOUR WORDS MADE ME FEEL LIKE I WAS STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU AND THE TREEs

HUGS

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ORCHIDLADY56 10/20/2012 9:27PM

    Wow! What a tree!

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MRSWHITEWOLF 10/19/2012 12:03AM

    You are a wonderful writer. Loved the blog and trees!

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CLOWN54 10/18/2012 11:29PM

    you should be a writer, love your blog. beautiful trees. I do understand how you feel.

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SASSYLJB 10/17/2012 8:58PM

    That is one amazing tree and such a great pic! Lovin it!

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SEPTEMBER, AUTUMN...HOW CAN THAT BE???

Friday, September 07, 2012

IS IT JUST ME, OR DOES IT SEEMS TOO EARLY FOR SUMMER TO BE GONE AND SCHOOL STARTING?
WELL, I'M DIGGING IN MY "FLIP FLOPS" AND TRYING TO STOP TIME...IT'S GETTING CHILLY HERE. WE WERE JUST GETTING A FEW DAYS OF NICE WEATHER AND NOW IT IS DEFINITELY FEELING LIKE FALL...I AM JUST NOT READY!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MRSWHITEWOLF 10/3/2012 11:46PM

    We been still having fall/summer weather here...I am loving it...Hope it lasts and not go away. We been really fortunate.

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NEWCATA 9/10/2012 7:04PM

    I am so with you on this, I so love the summer emoticon

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SASSYLJB 9/7/2012 11:02AM

    I know sweetie times files by so fast! But I so love the fall months, and all the family time it brings. The feeling of togetherness, and the goodwill that people share with each other. So as you my friend are digging your flipflops into the sand, I am digging out my fall decorations.
Waiting for the leaves to change!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SHANSHE 9/7/2012 10:51AM

    LOL on Diane's comment! I agree, summer is fading quickly... BUT, i LOVE Fall, it is my FAVORITE time of year, the weather, the leaves, the food, bonfires... everything except Halloween, I hate Halloween, lol!
Have a good day, my friend!
Shan

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ORCHIDLADY56 9/7/2012 8:24AM

    No kidding! I am afraid I will wake up one morning and it will be Christmas!

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LASKIE2 9/7/2012 6:25AM

    I agree! But I love Fall emoticon emoticon

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GHOSTFLAMES 9/7/2012 5:02AM

    ME EITHER.LOL GOOD LUCK ON YOUR SPARK JOURNEY WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU IF YOU NEED ANYTHING AT ALL JUST ASK.
TAKE CARE AND REMEEMBER TO TRACK DAILY YOUR FOOD AND FITNESS TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE.

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