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BBB: Day 68: It's been a month?

Friday, September 24, 2010

Well... apparently time flies, when you are distracted.

I finished my internal medicine month and it was a pretty busy month working 14 hour days 6 days/week. Today was my last day... and I move on to another busy and EXCITING (I'm claiming it!) month = Child Psychiatry. p.s. ~ 7 months til I'm a DR!!! :-)

My weight has not really decreased much but I have been working out steadily and even counting calories and eating better foods. So now, I have to be patient and KEEP making the right choices. I am going through my habits with a fine tooth comb... and trying to find ways to make each step better!

I WILL REACH MY GOALS. AND ... I WILL be much closer to the final goal by the time 2011 rolls in.

Focus now, celebrate later.

I need results. I want results.... and I'm going to get them.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GONABFIT 9/26/2010 6:05PM

    Thanks guys!

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NELLIEC 9/24/2010 5:23PM

    Considering how long it takes to be a doctor, you are within sight of the goal!!! emoticon emoticon

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CAMANDMAYASMOM 9/24/2010 11:01AM

    First of all, Congrats on being only 7 months away from being a DR!!! Girl, that is A-W-E-S-O-M-E!! I've been meaning to ask you what area of medicine are you going into? My daughter wants to be a physician at a Children's Hospital. She said she wants to work in the ER, but of course that could change over time:-)
And second, your positive attitude is contagious!
Keep it up. You can't help but get results!

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KATRIONAH 9/24/2010 10:09AM

    I love your positive attitude. With attitude like that your spirit can soar.....and YOU can do anything. Have a wonderful day and share a smile.......Karen emoticon

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TRAINER_T 9/24/2010 9:34AM

    emoticonOh YES you CAN!

Consistancy = Success

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JUSTFOXXY 9/24/2010 2:02AM

    Great attitude lady. You will get there, consistency is key.

Wow, only 7 mos. That time will fly. Congratulations.

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BBB: Day 37: I'm doing this for HER

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

You spread beauty where ever you go and believing in yourself allows others to believe in themselves. - gonabfit

I am doing this for Her

The 19 year old me. 138 lbs. Too embarrassed to actually wear this bathing suit in public! I was in HAWAII! and I did end up wearing a bathing suit in public, but not this one because I thought my stomach and thighs were too big.


the runner in me 8.24.10 - Just ran 5 miles... nothing like a good sweat to clear your mind


the young girl who was teased for being fat. Though looking back, I wasn't.

and For HER...

the me who KNEW nothing could stop me if I tried... and felt free to be. Before I was taught by the world, that it was NOT ok to be different. before I wasn't enough.

I'm doing this for the HER in me. The one who was too afraid to accept the curvy shape I was given at a young age, too insecure to truly be who I am, the one who longed to be the PRETTY one, the one who wanted so badly to be thought attractive and accepted, who wanted to be healthy, who wanted to be loved. To the HER who never felt like ENOUGH.

WELL, to HER I say, you are loved. You were loved before you knew what love was. You are LOVED despite your thighs, your hips, your stomach-that is not completely flat OR a 6-pack. You are LOVED because you are beautiful. and the sooner you believe it, the sooner you can thrive in this journey called LIFE... because truly it does not matter what others think of you. I will tell HER that they are fighting their own battles, and even if they say hurtful things, it stems from their insecurities and weakness, not yours! Happy people don't go around hurting others. So send them a prayer and HOLD YOUR head UP. If I can do it for HER, I can do it for me.

Looking at the 19 year old Hawaiian me, I just think... It is soo sad that even then I felt self-conscious about my weight... that's how I know this is more of a self-healing journey than a weight loss thing. I was beautiful... and I SHOULD have flaunted every bit of the beautiful body I was given.... and even looking at the pictures of myself now, I know I am not satisfied but I DO NOT LOOK THAT BAD. I am going to APPRECIATE where I AM NOW, while I strive to improve myself... because tomorrow is not promised. And each day is a chance to enjoy ALL that I am. Now. at this moment.

why are YOU doing this? emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JENNIFER9907 9/24/2010 11:05AM

    great blog! i was about in tears.. so true. good luck on your journey.

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MISHY19050 9/13/2010 12:02PM

    You speak my truth. I am also her. I have lived in shame of my body and a size six because i was a little thicker in the but and legs. Now with three kids and the same body i am finally becoming grateful for what God has blessed me with.
Thank you for that I needed it.
just beautiful!!!! keep up the good work, i know your inner struggle.

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MELLYBEANS0919 9/6/2010 8:53PM

    Very beautiful. You can do it!

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NLMARSHALLJX 9/3/2010 9:53PM

    This is beautiful. Awesome blog is all I can say. It encourages many people to do some self reflecting.

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DNS9264 8/26/2010 9:49PM

    Great blog! I've had the same feelings about how I used to feel so fat when I definitely wasn't. It's horrible what the teenage years do to people.

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SPARKLE1908 8/26/2010 6:47PM

    Excellent blog girl....we all have a "her" or "him" that is still longing to be free and happy!!!!!!

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LOSETHEWTIN08 8/26/2010 2:13PM

    Wonderful blog. Sweetie you have always been beautiful! That smile and your eyes filled with amazement nothing can stop you. Thank you for sharing you are truly amazing! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CBARRETT10 8/26/2010 2:02PM

  emoticon Thanks for sharing!

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JUSTFOXXY 8/26/2010 6:53AM

    Good for you lady! emoticon

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CAMANDMAYASMOM 8/25/2010 11:29AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon blog! Girl you had me almost in tears reading that. That is so true and heartfelt! I could've wrote this blog myself!!! Thank you so much for posting this.
So glad that you're my spark buddy! I know that you are going to make HER so proud! Well you already are, with the changes that you're already making in order to reach your goals.


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APATRICIAO521 8/25/2010 11:23AM

    Awesome blog! Good for you!!!

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GRACIE4ONE 8/25/2010 11:16AM


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NUTRIGIRL08 8/25/2010 11:10AM

    emoticonThanks for stopping by!

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MELTINGMIMI 8/25/2010 10:02AM


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FIT4LIFE! 8/24/2010 11:24PM

    Wonderful blog... wow, how I can relate! Never could appreciate how I was, and it took way too long to finally accept me in my skin. I'm so glad you can see your beauty - inside and out!!

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-SHIMMER-ANN- 8/24/2010 8:55PM

    Beautiful, girl!!!

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CLIMBERCHICK14 8/24/2010 8:29PM

    What an AWESOME blog!

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ABETTERKGIRL 8/24/2010 8:29PM

    This was such a beautiful blog. In some ways I felt like you were talking to me. I have photos of myself when I was thin and even at that time I felt fat and not very pretty. You are very right though, this is more than a weight loss journey this is a self- healing and self discovery for myself. Thanks for helping me to realize that

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LIFES_A_DANCE 8/24/2010 8:23PM

    sooooo true!! I hear you on all of this!!

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TEACHERANG 8/24/2010 8:16PM

    I LOVE this blog! Keep up the GREAT work!

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BEFIT014 8/24/2010 7:42PM

    Excellent Blog-so much truth & honesty!

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GENKI_WARRIOR 8/24/2010 7:17PM

    LOVED this blog! Thanks so much--we all need to remember this as we go along our journeys.


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    I totally hear you!

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    Awesome blog - truly awesome - thank you for posting this... I teared a little :D You ARE gorgeous and we're in this journey together ! Get it girlfriend !

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IFDEEVARUNS2 8/24/2010 5:09PM

    I love it! emoticon

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FOOFIT1 8/24/2010 4:51PM

    I understand where you're coming from. At a completely healthy 145, I thought I was fat and started dieting, and it lead to all sorts of disordered eating. This is a great post. You are BEAUTIFUL!


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AMAZING Before and AFTER! MAJOR MOTIVATION!!!! You can be an after TOO!

Monday, August 23, 2010

I'll start by saying this is JUST a visualization technique! lol. I found a program that let's you upload a pic and see what you'll look like at a diiferent weight! I LIKE IT!



Before BACK: Sorry, my bottoms are on crooked.



BEYONCE!!! LOL! I can't lie, I love my waist and butt lol! Just needs some fine tuning, and I'm hitting the BEACH!

SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO! lol :-D This is supposed to be 40 pounds lighter. We shall see!

The website is weight mirror it's free and you can customizeyour weight AND see you BMI ad IF YOUR GOAL WT IS with in your healthy BMI

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AGUAWOMEN 9/26/2010 8:05PM

    Tahnks for the imput.

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MELLYBEANS0919 9/6/2010 8:53PM

    Awesome. What is the site??

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FRANKBUD 9/6/2010 2:05PM

    i just love your determination

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MEREDIE02 8/24/2010 10:56PM

    Wow - that's WAY better than those virtual models!

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LOTUSFLOWER 8/24/2010 3:33PM


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KARLAMG86 8/24/2010 2:16PM

    The afters look so real! Sounds like a must-see website.

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SPARKLE1908 8/24/2010 1:42PM

    I'm gonna check that out!!!

You know you're gonna hit your goal...you always do!!!!!

Let's rock it!

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SMPO79 8/24/2010 12:40PM

    This is great motivation! And, you have a beautiful smile!

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RAVENSONG37 8/24/2010 12:23PM

    Awesome! You can do it!!

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TREASURINGLIFE 8/24/2010 12:02PM

    YOU CAN DO IT!! :)

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FLEURRR 8/24/2010 12:00PM

    You can do it! emoticon

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YOOVIE 8/24/2010 11:53AM

    holy moly! you are so inspiring and you'll totally get there!!!

Comment edited on: 8/24/2010 11:53:37 AM

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GONABFIT 8/24/2010 11:45AM

    YAY! I'm so happy you all enjoy it too! Visualization is KEY! If we can SEE ourselves at our goal weight.... Like really SEE it, we can learn to BEHAVE like the woman in the picture would!!! (meaning, exercising, not getting 2nd/3rds/etc)


emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SWEETLIPS 8/24/2010 11:29AM

    THANK YOU - I love how I am going to look ( oh, I will smile in my next picture). I feel like going on!! down 71 pounds and I am going to love getting there. It is worth the process. Yeah! emoticon

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MAGGIEX3UK 8/24/2010 8:58AM

    thanks for sharing this im definetly going to go check it out

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JUSTFOXXY 8/24/2010 6:01AM

    Very cool

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KFAYJAY 8/24/2010 12:44AM

    Cool!@ I am gonna check that out for sure!!!

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-SHIMMER-ANN- 8/23/2010 11:55PM

    Wow, that is so cool!!

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CARRAND 8/23/2010 11:28PM

    This is amazing. You're right. It is a motivator.

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CJJANISS 8/23/2010 11:05PM


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JAMER123 8/23/2010 10:53PM

    Beautiful! This can be the motivator that we all need, esp. me. Thanks for the site.

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GONABFIT 8/23/2010 10:51PM

    It's called weight mirror! and it's free!!!

Thanks! It makes me motivated... and I can compare what the REAL transformation will look like!

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GIRLMEA 8/23/2010 10:50PM

    Something to look forward to! :)

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FLAMENM 8/23/2010 10:47PM

    That is a great motivator!

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RAHAFEEZ 8/23/2010 10:47PM

    You look beautiful. Were can I get this program. I would love to see myself skinny again.

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BBB: Day 36: GoaLs MET, picture of dinner!

Monday, August 23, 2010

My dinner!

Woke up @ 7 am and worked out!
YAY. that was done through pure determination. ended up doing 20 mins cardio dvd (exercisetv) + 10 min yoga then walked dog 10 mins :-)

showered and got dressed to study... though I plan to go nowhere today lol. I'm gonna sit here and look pretty, if no one sees me but me!

Ate breakfast at 9. eating every 3-4 hrs.

emoticon eat according to the plan I made yesterday. If I notice things I left out, make a note and try to make a better plan for Tuesday. [ ate "mostly" according to plan. then decided to count pizza into my daily calories. I enjoyed it and COUNTED the cals, so it's all good. ;) ]
emoticonstick to 1200-1600 cals
emoticondrink 64 oz of H20
emoticon exercise 30 mins
emoticon eat fruit with breakfast
emoticon emoticon eat fruit + veggie for lunch and dinner [ ate only a fruit with lunch] dinner- will eat 2 servings of veggies :-) ]

Did extra exercise: 62 min walk!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    emoticon emoticon emoticon
Like those goals girl!! Keep it up.

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Day 35: I SAID NO!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

I decided to separate this part of my last post... here it is.

(Today was a really good eating day. I had fruit with breakfast. Fruit for a snack. and veggies with lunch. then veggies with dinner plus a baked apple.)

the surprising part is that my fiance and I were going on a study break date to the movies , and at the last minute couldn't go watch it. To cheer me up he offered to take me to my favorite pizza place. (hmmm.... I never thought I was an emotional eater... lol, but at that moment I KNEW I would feel better if I could get the pizza... and yet) I TURNED down pizza at my favorite pizza place because I didn't want to need that to feel better.

then, on a mission to find something else for us to do, and make me happy, he takes me on a ride... and then pulls over. When I ask where we are, he says I'm taking you to cold stone!! and AGAIN I turned him down! and AGAIN I WANTED cold stone too. I mean, it tastes goooood. I like it. But at that moment I realized that the happiness I'm chasing is NOT in a container or grease filled pizza box. the happiness I want, will come from resisting things I know I don't need on a regular basis.

And while I appreciated my fiance for trying to make me feel better. it made me feel bad(because I REALLY wanted it LOL and I felt empty saying no)
... Have I been sending him signs that food will make me happy if I'm disappointed? I'm going to improve on that. And since I probably have been sending those signs, I'm going to work on SAYING NO!!!

Oh and then the weirder part is after I said NO to the pizza and the cold stone - I felt like I just wanted to say turn around and let's eat that food! lol...

but I didn't!

so there. now I'm safe back at home, with my baked chicken and baked apple. safe to fight another day.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Well good for you girl!! That really takes some serious will power to resist those things, especially if you're in an emotional state. Way to go! :-)

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HKUHL77 8/23/2010 1:35AM

    Congratulations on avoiding the temptation of pizza and cold stone. Took a lot of willpower for sure. Way to go!!

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BECKYQUIGLEY 8/22/2010 11:07PM

    Good for you! I think it's a natural thing for a lot of people to offer food to cheer someone up, but I think it's wonderful that you were able to resist! emoticon

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GONABFIT 8/22/2010 10:16PM

    thank you both!!

memeemee- It is HARD, but you can do it! I'm gonna come check on you!

Cmrand54- yes he looked so SHOCKED that i said no! lol... then went to cold stone as a last resort. when Isaid no again he really was surprised!!

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MEMEEMEEE 8/22/2010 10:08PM

    It's very hard to turn down your favorite things and you should be proud of yourself for standing your ground and realizing you don't need food to be happy. I'm working on being that strong to walk away from the junk that calls my name...it's hard but with time it wont even be a second thought.

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CARRAND 8/22/2010 9:57PM

    It's never easy, but you did good to turn down the food you didn't need. I'll bet you confused the boy friend! You should have seen my husband the first time I went to Fuddrucker's and didn't get the strawberry shake.

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