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Day 14/30 (deleted? ) Draw the Line

Monday, February 22, 2010

written for yesterday while I was on call. I wrote it on my phone and apparently it was deleted! )

Well today didn't go the way I wanted despite good preparation. I think it was just a bunch of stuff going on... anyway, despite some unplanned eating I decided at 8 pm to DRAW THE LINE! I didn't have to keep eating just because I messed up earlier. I didn't have to feel defeated because I didn't follow my eating plan... All I HAD to do.. was DRAW THE LINE and start over. one off day doesn't = a 5 lb gain...

and so I did. And I stopped right where I was. Threw away the umpteenth french fry (and the rest of the container) and saved the hamburger (to give to my BF). and really the day was out of control with the fast food. You would have thought I had lost my mind with the # of times I bought fast food... but the moral of the story is... I STOPPED! GO ME! Yes I ate more than planned and yes I ate probably 2000 cals but it wasn't 3000! LOL

AND I did a jump rope workout right there in the call room at the hospital. 20 MINS of jumprope and 10 minutes of squats, pushups, walking lunges :-) And burned 300 cals!
Not to mention the 30 min taebo workout I did before going to work! :-)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RAYLINSTEPHENS 2/23/2010 3:26PM

    You are right - Yay You!!

You seized the moment and stopped the craziness! WTG!!

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SPARKLE1908 2/23/2010 8:09AM

    good for you!!! I need to learn to draw the line in a few more areas myself....kudos for staying on track...and you're right, one little slip won't derail everything you have accomplished!!

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FIT2BTHIN2 2/22/2010 11:34PM

    Thanks for writing this... I too will draw the line.

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GONABFIT 2/22/2010 10:05PM

    thanks Tamm!

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DRTAMM 2/22/2010 9:22PM

    Good job sis! Its very important to stop when you realize you want to start over!

YAY

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Day 13/30: Good start for tomorrow

Sunday, February 21, 2010

I did a good job with my nutrition and squeezed in a good workout (exercise bike + weights) with the bf.

I even went on a quick grocery run at the last minute! lol... got fish, fruits/veggies/ salad etc.
Even prepared lunch/dinner for tomorrow. I'm back on call for 30 hours tomorrow. So wish me luck!

What I packed in my lunch cooler/bag(got it from target and it's stylish and cute! :-) :
Lunch: chicken noodle soup + mixed salad with tomatoes (and lite dressing)

Dinner: baked tilapia (2 pieces) + 4 broccoli spears

Snack: carrot sticks + cheese square (80 cals) + granola
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and I'm bringing exercise shoes and a jump rope just in case I can't get to the gym (we're not supposed to leave the hospital but sometimes they are nice and will let you leave for 45 mins or so!)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GONABFIT 2/22/2010 7:47PM

    thanks! but don't.. lol I'm trying to get better but sometimes even the best plans get derailed! ;)

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ORIONKATHY 2/21/2010 6:15PM

    Wow! You are sure organized. I envy you! emoticon

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SPARKLE1908 2/21/2010 10:37AM

    Way to go girl!!!!!

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DRTAMM 2/21/2010 1:05AM

    LOL sis.... You did a good job! Great job getting so much done in one day! Enjoy the great weather! Love ya!!!!

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JDYJMM2000 2/21/2010 12:45AM

  Great job!!!

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GONABFIT 2/21/2010 12:38AM

    oh sorry to be misleading!

I call it work, because we are there so long that it feels like a job ! LOL I am a 3rd year student, but basically we have to be ther just as long as the docs, we just are paying them!!! LOL :-D During that time, we take care of any patient that comes on the service, and if it gets slow at night, we kind of sleep in shifts ( the head dr. stays awake- likely because they are on shorter shifts, i.e. night shift and get breaks earlier) and then the student will get some sleep at night, but you have your pager on because if a patient comes in and they pager you, you have to go take care of them :-)

Sorry for the long explanation!

Comment edited on: 2/21/2010 12:39:17 AM

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FOOFIT1 2/21/2010 12:27AM

    Wow! So are you already an M.D. then, working on your residency? 30 hours on call. CRAZY!!!! What do you do during all that time?

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10-12/30 : 30 hours at work

Friday, February 19, 2010

Wed: Was on call so I missed a blog but I DID great working out. made time to do 17 flights of stairs, snuck away to run 4 miles :-D walked 30 mins around the hospital... and basiccally tried to stay active and make somewhat healthier choices

Thurs: Finished my 30 hour call was exhausted. So tired so so tired. Came home and went to sleep. Needed to study... got a little done. tried to muster up the strength to exercise, ended up spraining my ankle while doing a dance routine! :-/ sigh

Friday: still had to go to work, walking was hard. ankle hurts... hoping its going to be better tomorrow but hte test is in a week and must buckle down... so it if I am MIA... that is why. School comes first and I am giving my all to getting a great grade! So I will be on, but only briefly! Test FRIDAY!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEENY_BIKINI 2/20/2010 10:20PM

    Concentrate on your test. Rock it!!!!

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REDWITCH78 2/20/2010 1:47PM

    Good Luck on your test. I'm sending healing vibes to your ankle. "Na-na-na-na-na."(Caddyshack) emoticon

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SPARKLE1908 2/20/2010 10:27AM

    No worries...I know you have a lot on your plate so being m.i.a. is expected!!

Keep working towards your goals and I hope your ankle heals soon!

TTYL

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Day 9/30:Honesty and a beautiful quote!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

I saw this quote and felt like I needed to share with you all! not sure why.

"After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, and you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security, and you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child. You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So, plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure... that you really are strong, and you really do have worth." -- basically I just like this quote! lol

--- Also I weighed in today and saw 150 on the scale. I hoped it was an error. I hope it's from lack of sleep, being sick, eating too many salty foods... BUT the truth is that the scale said what it said, and that is a reality. I am sad, hurt, confused but all and all this is a mere BLIP in my path and I will give 2 weeks before I weigh in to allow my body to readjust... mean while eating MORE veggies and healthy foods! But... i do think I've been doing MANY of the right things, waking up an HOUR before I need to... when I already have to wake up and BE at work by 6:15 most days.... skipping treats( like avoiding dairy queen, etc) , halving my more unhealhty meals, lifting weights MORE and cardio... So maybe this is a readjustment period. I WILL REACHMY GOAL!

I bought my bridesmaid dress... the lady tried to MAKE me put on a 12 (which I told her I did not wear) but fine, I don't have a point to prove and I want to look BEAUTIFUL in the wedding, not stuffed into the dress so I tried it on. I must say I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief when it was TOO big like I said it would be! YAY! And the size 10 was a little baggy in the shoulders/ breast area LOL so I'm going to try to lose a size by college roommates wedding in JUNE (the dress gets back April 1- then you need a month for adjustments). We shall see. But at this point I just want the dress to be comfortable... because NO ONE walks around with a size printed on the OUTSIDE of their clothes... its more important that it look flattering!


Long day tomorrow. 30 hr work shift. So I took a long nap, woke up to get on spark/ check some emails and study then back to sleep!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEENY_BIKINI 2/19/2010 8:50PM

    Great quote. Loved it. I am sure you will gorgeous in your dress.

Cheers.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LOTUSFLOWER 2/17/2010 12:27PM

    I love that quote!!

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JULIEO100 2/17/2010 10:10AM

    Thanks for sharing this quote it sounds awsome! I'm sure you will look spectacular in your dress. Just remember the insides are what counts!
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STOP.WAITING 2/17/2010 9:32AM

    I absolutely loved the quote. And your view on clothing! I need to remember that sometimes when shopping! As long as it's flattering, no one can see the size! You're doing great and will look beautiful in June :)

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SLOLOSER 2/17/2010 8:11AM

    Good quote!

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MEDDYPEDDY 2/17/2010 12:30AM

    Thanks for the quote - I loved it too!

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TEACHEROF4TH 2/17/2010 12:08AM

    I loved this quote. Thank you so much for posting it. Do you mind if I borrow it? I also love your attitude with the bridesmaid dress fitting issues... you are SO right, just make sure the dress looks great by the wedding. And keep working out! You have every chance of success in losing those inches!

Thank you for your inspiration!

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Day 8/30: I can see clearly now the rain is gone!

Monday, February 15, 2010

Well, not quite... lol but I thought it was a catchy title!

I had a nice long talk with my mother today :-) She is a great listener and I ABSOLUTELY love her. :-D Definitely my best friend... well her and DrTAMM (My sister)! :-D Back to the point. I talked to my mother today and she reminded me to remember my worth in all situations. She said something along these lines: "Baby you are worth so much, never forget that. You don't have to settle for less than you deserve and there is/will be someone who appreciates you exactly how you are. (mentally, physically, spiritually). Someone who won't try to change you at every turn. Someone who will let you be, let you grow, and gently deal with your flaws. Who will respect you and not make you feel less than."

So i guess that is hard to understand if you don't know the whole story... but basically I've been going through a lot separate from all this weight loss stuff, but being the positive person that i am I usually just sweep it away and move on with the things on my list that take higher priority. Not to mention I'm a pretty private person (OK VERY private... lol Some of my friends hate that ;) oh well) ... which is why it's AMAZING that I have a blog + pictures of myself. But maybe I like being open in a way that is relatively safe lol :-D and I gotta love spark! Today I just decided that I wanted to share... even if it's just a little. I'm at a place where I need to decide if a person should stay in my life or not. I have pro's con's, reasons why the should stay, and why they should go... and usually I'm a much more decisive person and that scares me that I've become attached in a way that isn't good for me. And part of me feels like it could work out beautifully if the person would just act better... then the intelligent part of me knows that if it hasn't worked yet... it probably never will and there's a phrase that says "If it don't fit, don't force it, just relax and let it go." So basically I'm stuck between my heart and my brain, my independence and dependence, my self-respect and self-denial... and as easy as it is for me to choose... it's just that hard to make the right decision.

But something my mom said tonight scared me. (And she's said it before about the same topic): "baby... never let someone steal your light. You usually shine... and I think I see your light fading." (paraphrased of course!)

Self=preservation.... I need my light back




**Sidenote- exercising = dancing and strength training. Will count cals, think I went over. yesterday did 1 hr 5 mins of cardio and strength! Trying to get my body back. :-)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STEPHANON 2/16/2010 7:49AM

    Sounds like you already have an idea of what the right decision is, but you're finding it hard to actually take that step. Hoping that you're able to find the strength to give yourself what you need and not just what you want.
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MANDORA3 2/16/2010 6:23AM

    I hope your light shines bright soon with the right decision! One of my favorite quotes is:
"Don't make someone a priority, if they only make you an option!"

I love your moms thinking! emoticon

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_RAMONA 2/16/2010 12:26AM

    Hey there, Beautiful! Funny how Valentine's Day always leads to reflection no matter where you are at in you life... and you have one really wise and loving Mom!

This is a small part of what I wrote in my 'LOVE Story' blog:
"My MOST beautiful mistake was in loving someone who 'got me' so perfectly that sometimes I felt he could read my mind... trouble was, he 'got me' because we shared a common place of brokenness... he was in every way my willing accomplice, but accomplice in the least of what I was (whtever I was willing to limit myself to for his sake), NOT in the most of what I was striving for (to shine every way for which I was created). The problem was that I didn't want to live the rest of my life in that broken place, and he didn't even realize just how broken that place was... and I paid an extraordinarily high a price to learn that."

...And if your light is fading, you are paying way too high a price.

I'll be praying for you!
{{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}
Ramona

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GONABFIT 2/15/2010 10:29PM

    thank you for taking the time to read and give me advice. You are right... compromising who you are probably isn't the way to get what you want in the lonnnnnnggggg run. (even when you aren't sure you're compromising ;) THANKS!

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CRIS76 2/15/2010 10:22PM

    You should never have to compromise yourself in any relationship - if it a person you want to move forward with, then it probably isn't a good idea. If they are just a friend - as long as you know their faults and can accept them (that they don't harm you) then being friends isn't bad, just don't expect anything outside their norm.

I wish you the best of luck with your decision - it can be hard, but sometimes you have to look at the whole.

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